Life does not end with a stage IV diagnosis (really!)

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  • RonnieKay
    RonnieKay Member Posts: 2,067
    edited May 2016

    Jharris...love & gentle hugs to you. I know the days when you wake up & just wish you could sweep bc under the rug (or wash it away on the not-so-gentle cycle). Thinking of you, hoping there is sweet joy that helps to lessen the harsh impact of this heartless disease.

    Kandy...so happy to hear you are healing well!!! Oh, oh, oh...August you'll be rocking & cuddling non-stop...taking your grandchild on walks, pointing out birds & trees & flowers. I'm a water baby like you & Artist & you're bringing back my ancient memory of breaking my leg in a sledding accident on 12/28/64 (before most of you were born! I was 10)...and the next August, winning the county champ title in freestyle, back & breaststroke! Swim, Kandy, swim!!!

    Caryn...the milk on Mile's lips is hilarious...and the smile!!!! Retired school (grade school & high school) secretary (and sub services gal) here. It's so hard to see strife in the district...but so necessary to stand up for what's right & just. I retired just before our district teacher strike in 09...very glad to miss the hard feelings by so many. Hoping for resolution quickly! In the meantime...hope leaving on time (something that just doesn't exist in teacher land!) means more time with Miles!!!

    Gator!!!! Thank you for sharing the love!!! The joy in your gorgeous face & loving pride in his sweet face...I need another tissue. You are a blessed lady & I hope those kiddos share their amazing quests with you for decades to come!!! A priceless picture :-)

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  • artistatheart
    artistatheart Member Posts: 2,176
    edited May 2016

    RonnieKay, I was raised on a swim team and lived in So. Cal for years so water was definitely my friend. Then about 10 years ago I broke my ankle very badly slipping on a snow hill. So when summer came the pool was my favorite spot. Warm days and swimming, I can't wait! Caryn and Kandy, I can't wait to see more baby pictures!

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  • 50sgirl
    50sgirl Member Posts: 2,527
    edited May 2016

    Kandy, I will check into that beautiful resort of yours soon. I am still waiting for spring to arrive up here. I am so happy to hear about your progress since surgery. It is amazing how quickly you are recovering. I am sure you think it is not fast enough, but I think it is amazing that you have come so far. You must be an inspiration to your doctors. I have no doubt that you will be able to hold that grandbaby in your arms in August. Just the thought warms my heart.

    GatorGirl, the picture of you and your grandson is wonderful. I have told friends and family members about what your grandson did for you. He is such a special child.

    Enjoy your weekend.

    Lynne




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  • GatorGal
    GatorGal Member Posts: 2,550
    edited May 2016

    Lynne, thanks for sharing what a special grandson my Thomas is. I am so blessed to have him in my life. His mom and my son never married but she lets us have him every other weekend. She is a special mom. My son has many problems, in addition to fighting addiction, and does the best he can do, but she realizes that he needs a relationship with his grandparents and makes sure he gets it. She is a great role model for her children.

    It is great seeing the baby pictures. I was able to see all my children today and my three granddaughters. We celebrated Mother's Day today. My husband cooked a nice dinner. The little ones called it "outdoor" chicken. Barbecued on the grill. Yummy.

    I am hoping to go to the Orioles game tomorrow if we have nice weather. Is it ever going to be warm??

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  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 12,424
    edited May 2016

    Kandy,

    Holding that new baby in your arms will be amazing. August will come quickly.

    A very happy Mother's Day to all.

    Outdoor chicken? Too funny

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  • Bliss58
    Bliss58 Member Posts: 1,154
    edited May 2016

    Happy Mother's Day to all the BCO mothers here of children and pets alike. Enjoy this day!

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  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 12,424
    edited May 2016

    💐💐🍾🍾

    Happy Mother's Day!

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  • LynnFish
    LynnFish Member Posts: 22
    edited May 2016

    Hello Ladies! Happy Mothers' day, a tiny bit belated! ....Is it just me who feels a certain irony as our breasts kill us! :)

    I clicked on this thread ("Life does not end with stage IV diagnosis!) and read some recent comments, but did not read through all 1,400+ comments, so please forgive any repeat....BUT, re: the topic...Hell Yeah! Life does not end!! In many ways it begins! I was diagnosed almost 18 months ago, and I think these may have been the best 18 months of my life! I have reprioritized my life, and am fast-tracking all of my "someday" goals. I only wish that I had this perspective earlier...BUT, so glad and grateful to have it now! So many people get hit by a bus, or fall from a heart attack, and they never get this time to sort things out and do what makes sense and is right. We do get this time...very fortunate in this regard.

    To any newbies...please, please, please don't freak out!! Recalibrate, and make the most of the time you have. You might have a lot of time, you don't know. That is an agreement between the pharmaceuticals, your lifestyle, and your body.

    Happiness to all! Take care, go vegan! LynnFish

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  • Wendy3
    Wendy3 Member Posts: 1,012
    edited May 2016

    LynnFish that's really great I was diagnosed a year ago lots has happened but when I got done with the crying things got better. After having to completely rearrange my life moving cities and selling old homes for new after all the logistical stuff was done. Life got better I love more I see more and I enjoy more. I waste nothing and living in the moment is the best way to be. So Lynn I couldn't agree with you more.

    Wendy

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  • LynnFish
    LynnFish Member Posts: 22
    edited May 2016

    Wendy, I'm so very glad for you! So many people don't understand and almost can't deal with the happiness of folks like us! I frequently find that other people feel worse about it all (i.e. my illness...) than I do, so I find myself comforting and reassuring them, which is kind of odd, right? :) I've said to many people "Obviously we're all dying, I'm just doing it faster!". And more consciously. While I certainly don't look forward to the really nasty stuff that will almost certainly come near the end, I suspect that even that will be OK, especially if life is lived well up to that point...AND, side note, I'm pretty certain that happiness helps our health...

    Enjoy!

    LynnFish

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  • artistatheart
    artistatheart Member Posts: 2,176
    edited May 2016

    Happy belated Mother's Day to all! GatorGal, I love that outdoor chicken too! LOL! 3 grandaughters1 You are truly blessed. I hope you got to the game, had sunshine and a blast! I love going to baseball games. It does help tremendously to live in the moment every day and just do what you love as often as you can. And yes, my perspective on life has changed dramatically! Wendy, I may be changing cities and homes soon and while it is scary, I look forward to a new adventure in life!

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  • GatorGal
    GatorGal Member Posts: 2,550
    edited May 2016

    While I don't have the exact date, May 2008 was when my BC recurrence was discovered in my right lung. My sister prays for my healing. She says she wants a miracle. I feel I've had a couple of miracles. In 1987 I was given a 20% chance of surviving 5 years from my original Brest cancer. I was cancer free for 20 years. That was miracle one. Miracle two is 8 years with stage IV. While my qualify of life isn't what it was, mainly due to chemo side effects and fatigue, I am so thankful to have an oncologist and friends and family who really have stood by me. I have done my best to make these past years meaningful both for me and those who love me. It hasn't been easy and it hasn't been perfect but we do the best we can do with the hand we are dealt. That's what I strive for every day, even if that means a day I stay in bed because of low counts.

    Artist, I can't imagine changing cities and homes but you sound excited. You must be way more adventurous than me!! I'm happy for you! Sounds like it worked out well for Wendy.

    Still thankful, Caryn, for this thread

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  • Bliss58
    Bliss58 Member Posts: 1,154
    edited May 2016

    LynnFish, I totally agree with you! I am fast-tracking the things I've always put off. I'm originally from Denver and have lived in Colorado my whole life. I've always wanted to tour the Molly Brown House, but just never got around to it. So, this year for Mother's Day, my teen daughter and I went there for high tea. We sat with a great group of ladies and had a ball! One small thing off my bucket list. Happy Sunday to all.

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  • artistatheart
    artistatheart Member Posts: 2,176
    edited May 2016

    Thanks GatorGal for both the positive thinking on your situation and the encouragement about moving. We still waffle around and haven't made any decisions yet. We just can't decide what would be the best solution. We both have good jobs here and a wonderful home. Moving would mean starting over somewhere new, Not an easy thing at our ages (mid-50's). I hate for my DH to have to as he is very established. But trying to downsize here is nearly impossible because smaller houses get snapped up almost as soon as they list and are super expensive. Too much for my mind to think about along with everything else. Somedays I think we just JUMP, others I just want to crawl under the covers.....

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  • GatorGal
    GatorGal Member Posts: 2,550
    edited May 2016

    i really get that crawling under the covers! I've gotten to be pretty good at that! Especially after a weekend filled with grandchildren! LOL!


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  • artistatheart
    artistatheart Member Posts: 2,176
    edited May 2016

    Oh, hahahaha! Yes, I remember when my kids used to come up to my face very early in the morning and whisper rather loudly MOOOOOMMMMY! so as not to wake me up.........

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  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 12,424
    edited May 2016

    I've spent a couple of nights at my granddaughter's house when my dd was out. She wakes up and sits up in her bed shouting "Mimi, Mimi, Mimi!", until I come into her room. A very efficient alarm clock.

    Here's Miles at 4 weeks old:

    image

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  • Kandy
    Kandy Member Posts: 1,461
    edited May 2016

    Awww, he's so cute.

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  • GatorGal
    GatorGal Member Posts: 2,550
    edited May 2016

    Mimi, Mimi, Mimi, you have adorable grandchildren!!

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  • ShetlandPony
    ShetlandPony Member Posts: 4,924
    edited May 2016

    Oh, very adorable photo, exbrxgrl. I can just about smell the wonderful kissing-his-head baby scent.

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  • DivineMrsM
    DivineMrsM Member Posts: 9,620
    edited May 2016

    Wow, what a beautiful baby boy

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  • Nel138281
    Nel138281 Member Posts: 2,124
    edited May 2016

    beautiful!

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  • 50sgirl
    50sgirl Member Posts: 2,527
    edited May 2016

    Caryn, that is a beautiful picture of a beautiful baby. He looks like he would like to say something profound. It must have warmed your heart and put a smile on your face when you heard your granddaughter calling "Mimi".

    Enjoy the weekend, everyone.

    Lynne

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  • dlb823
    dlb823 Member Posts: 9,430
    edited May 2016

    What a sweetheart little Miles is! So handsome already! And I'm smiling at the image of your granddaughter calling you! You are very blessed!

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  • ABeautifulSunset
    ABeautifulSunset Member Posts: 990
    edited May 2016

    What a beautiful baby, Caryn. I've got SO many years to wait before I get one if those!

    Here is my life does not end at stage 4 upcoming vacation: this summer my DH,DS, DD and I are going on an African Safari. We are going to Tanzania and then on a Gorilla trek in Rwanda. It was very expensive... We probably would've saved a lot in airfare if we booked it for NEXT summer, but I'm kinda in the why wait mode. I mean, i feel great now, and anything could happen. So... Off we go.

    Stefanie


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  • singlemom1
    singlemom1 Member Posts: 434
    edited May 2016

    Your trip sounds very exciting stefajoy!! I think that is awesome that you are going for it and not waiting. I hope you have a wonderful time!

    Caryn, too cute for words!!!!

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  • DivineMrsM
    DivineMrsM Member Posts: 9,620
    edited May 2016

    Stef, what an amazing trip you have to look forward to

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  • artistatheart
    artistatheart Member Posts: 2,176
    edited May 2016

    OMG Caryn, Miles is sooooo gorgeous...... A truly beautiful baby! Stephanie, your vacation sounds fabulous. And heck ya, why wait? When it feels right it just is. It is so great you are going as a family and will create such wonderful memories for years to come.

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  • Wendy3
    Wendy3 Member Posts: 1,012
    edited May 2016

    Miles is adorable my goodness I want one of these too I can wait forever for that one.

    Stefanie that sounds like the dream. I have been thinking lately where I would like to still go. Reading your post gives me something to ponder. You have to tell us all about it and lots of pictures please

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  • 50sgirl
    50sgirl Member Posts: 2,527
    edited May 2016

    Stefanie, Your upcoming trip sounds like a dream vacation. What a wonderful adventure for all of you. I am glad you aren't waiting another year. It would be hard to wait. Take lots of pictures so you can post them for us.

    Lynn

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