DIEP 2014

JerseyMomOf3

good luck to all the ladies having surgery this week! We are here cheering you on!! ((Hugs))

pollyanna5

Anyone find after surgery wishing they had just done the mastectomy, and not the reconstruction ? I'm sure I will feel differently, once I stop feeling so cruddy.  But this recovery is nasty.  The breast part isn't too bad, or it seems that way, compared to the abdominal area.  The pulling of the skin is brutal, I can't straighten up, I'm numb, etc, etc, etc.  Sorry it's been a long day, and I'm weepy, and sore.  It's the first day my kids are home, which I'm thrilled, but they just up my stress levels.  My mom has had them this second week and she is burnt out too with the 5.  They go to their dads' next weekend, but it's us for this week.   I have meals coming in, friends coming into clean, people driving thekids around, but even with that they are just wearing me out (5,7,9,11,11 ages).  I want to feel better, and I don't.   I just feel kind of depressed today.  So sore.  And then don't even know what is coming up with the oncologist next week .

Sorry for the pity post, just a rough day.

goldie4040

Dvygirl, leaving to the open air as much as possible is great, if you can do it. What I like about the panty shields is they are not super right against the skin the way I tape them on and I feel like the wound is getting air, but it can't leak all very thing.

Zenful

Pollyanna , sorry you are having a rough time of it.  I can understand how 5 children could make it feel more challenging. I only had me and my DH to worry about, so I didn't feel the pressure of trying to heal sooner than I should. It's not unusual to feel a bit blue around the three week mark.  You don't have to apologize for posting your feelings. That's what we are here for. I hope you feel better soon. ((Hugs ))

Cherrie

pollyanna5- You have every right to feel whatever you feel this is a tough recovery, but you will get there. Take baby steps and take great care of yourself. It sure is tough with young children. Family and friends will need to circle the wagons and support you during this time. Once I went into my 4th week I had a much better attitude. You WILL get there. 

Goldie- so sorry about Lily. Please keep is updated. 

Jmb5- I am 1.5 years out. I still have tightness around scar on tummy and a puffy belly. I am numb below belly button and I too never saw a difference with my inner thigh lipo. (9 mo.) I need to workout more than I do, but I have come to accept this body. I look good in the mirror and my energy is back. Now if I could just do one girls push up and one sit up. My fault. 

thinkpink4ever

pollyanna, sorry that you're in a blue funk and feeling overwhelmed.  Please know that you are not alone.  I think once you really start feeling better, you won't have any regrets.  I thought about doing a delayed reconstruction, but I figured that doing immediate construction would save me a surgery.  If I would have done the delayed DIEP, I would have had the same incisions that I would have with immediate reconstruction.  So, I preferred to just get it done!  Stay encouraged, my friend.  Sounds like you have alot of help, and don't be afraid to ask for more help if you need it!

One love,

tp4ever

aff

sorry Dee, I didn't mean to leave you off my best wishes. I didn't see your name on the list above. Positive thoughts coming your way for tomorrow. 

goldie4040

Oh Polly, you are feeling all the normal things.  5 kids?  That's enough to make a completely well person over the edge, let alone somebody who is recovering from major surgery.  The tummy takes time.  Try to rest.  This week that they are home try to delegate as much as you can.  You don't need any set backs.  Also, what Zen said is true.  For some reason week three is the magic number for a little depression to set in.  It passes fairly quickly.  Week 4 seems to be the turning point for many of us, and up hill from there.  Do no ever feel badly about letting loose around here.  Let it all go.  We don't judge, just support the best we can. 

Cherrie, a friend on another site recommended wall push ups to me. They are easier than girl push ups, and it's a start. 

Teacher64

Pollyanna-not a pity party. You have a full plate. Sometimes it seems we are there for a buffet we didn't want, but after week 3, there is a turn around. Take it easy and let friends do as much as possible this week.

trish01254

Pollyanna - I was regretting the recon when I was in hospital.  I didnt feel like I was a strong enough person to get through the healing of this surgery.  I was very blue but a wonderful nurse's aide helped me through with her stories of strength.  Keep coming back here for encouragement when you need some.  You will feel better. 
Trish

jlbloom

Pollyanna, I had delayed DIEP after my BMX.  Not my choice, but a lymph node had them delay the reconstruction.  The DIEP would have been the same either way.  Having two surgeries in two months seems to have more of an impact in your recovery time.  I agree with Goldie, five kids would stress me out more than my recovery from DIEP did.  This too shall pass.  I believe, in the end you will be glad everything was over with only one surgery.

LisaLou, my heart aches for you.  I hope some of the information that jbdayton shared will help you.

Prayers for all of you and the surgery ladies!  ...Julie (from DIEP 2013)

pollyanna5

The kids are being pretty good today.  The older 3 did the laundry for me, and the dishes, while I napped/dozed on the couch.  We had lunch and dinner brought in, so that helps.  The younger two are at each other ,but copious amounts of TV is okay for this week I think.  It's raining, so they can't go outside, not that I could supervise much there.  Friends are taking the kids to gymnastics tomorrow night, grandma is doing the movie Thursday or Wednesday night, so it's sort of restful.  Had a decent morning, but this afternoon is rough.  Just very, very tired and sore.  

We have lots of helps, and then they are off Friday morning for 4 days, and then back Monday evening.  So, I will have lots of time to rest.  Cleaning people coming in.

I think that is part of the problem, I have lots of help, but I still feel cruddy and overwhelmed.  Their dad is being difficult, and causing issues with custody, so that is stressful as well.  I also figured part of my funk is my dad, passed away July 18th last year from dementia complications, and he started to go downhill around this date, and his birthday is the end of the week.  So, that is probably part or a lot of it as well. 

TinaHoff

Lemon, you made me smile when you wrote that "it's not a sprint it's a marathon."  I find recovery the most difficult aspect, as it turns out that I am not good at the patience and waiting for things to improve.  My head knows things will get better, but sometimes it's hard to avoid that feeling that "this is my life now, and this sucks!"

And you are right - we are blessed to be going through this in our time, as there have been SO many advances in medicine even in the last five years, not only for the treatment of breast cancer, but also to manage the side effects of that treatment.

Tina

pollyanna5

Also,  noticing that I'm sweating a lot since surgery.  I noticed in the hospital but the floor was hot, so I assumed it was that.  But, 13 days out, and I'm still sweating like crazy day and night!  Side effect of surgery? I did this after giving birth each time, so was wondering if it was just a surgical reaction?

TinaHoff

Pollyanna,

It's perfectly normal and understandable, feeling how you've been feeling.  I, too, had about two and a half weeks of "what the hell was I thinking?" about this surgery.  Did I really miss my right boob that much, to put up with all this pain, and not being able to get to the bathroom by myself?  But I'm just about to start week 4, and not only can I get up and down the stairs by myself, I am able to shower every day, and stand long enough to do the dishes.

I'm glad your kiddos are helping out.  Continue to let them.  From my own experience, it's been easier for my 10-year-old daughter to cope with all my breast cancer drama when she can do something for me.  Pick stuff up that I drop (which is a lot), load the dishwasher, and load the washer.  She also loves to help me with my exercises.

I'm sorry that the kid's father is being such a poop.  I pray he gets a shot of compassion when next he visits the kids, and comes to ask "Polly, you are the mother of my children, and I care about you.  What can I do to help you?"

I lost my father before my diagnosis, and I couldn't help thinking about him a lot during my treatment, surgeries, and recovery.  When I would feel really crappy and pissed off about how much I was hurting, I'd think about him, and imagine him saying to me "Yeah, but just think how good it's going to feel once it stops hurting!"  It's one of his corny dad jokes, but it always made me smile.

Tina

Shine14

Hi Everybody!

I just joined so I thought I would introduce myself.  I feel like a stalker reading all your great posts and learning about your lives but not sharing anything myself.

I was diagnosed with DCIS in late April and had a lumpectomy on June 10th.  While I am so blessed that everything came back showing non-invasive cancer, the margins were not sufficient and my girls are smallish so my BS is not comfortable removing more without leaving a yucky indentation.  So now I am on the road to mastectomy!  I was somewhat blindsided by this news as I thought that it was all well contained, but have come around to accept that this is the path I need to follow.  One of the things that has helped me is reading all of your stories!  I am a person who steps up to a new challenge and all the "you can do this!" posts have really helped me believe I can.

I met with a plastic surgeon on Saturday to discuss DIEP and felt really comfortable with him.  I live in Cincinnati, he and his partner work out of Columbus, but he splits his time between the two and he has a lot of experience.  A possible issue is that my belly fat might not be enough to bring me up to my current cup size.  Did anyone else have this issue?  I cannot say I will be devastated if I drop in size, but am worried that the abdominal surgery will be really tight. 

Thanks for all the help you have given me so far sharing your experiences!  I am so glad to have a group like this to provide mutual support. 

aff

Welcome Shine! Very sorry you have to join us. I lurked for a couple weeks before I posted as I was trying to gather as much info as I could. You will get feedback as several of these amazing ladies were pulled very tight after their surgery. I am just over 2 weeks post surgery. I opted for a umx and am still pulled pretty tight. I am not yet quite upright but have made huge improvements in just 2 short weeks and have no regrets. 

Teacher64

Shine - lurking is 100% normal. It helps you learn at your own pace. So sorry you have had to join us, but we will help you in any way we can. 

Teacher64

Today I got some answers from my PS about the pain of last week and the deep blue funk That hit me after getting the surgery packet for stage 2. I talked to another of his patients and feel better. I've decided I need to wake up and be grateful for all my blessings, chief among them that the cancer is gone. I'm looking forward to the end of this marathon. 

Zenful

Shine,I didn't have enough belly fat, so I ended up at NOLA, where they combined my butt fat with my belly fat to make two D breasts.  My options in Ohio were Cleveland or Columbus, but they don't combine flaps.  I was pulled very tight, but it is getting looser. I am still doing a lot of stretching, but that may just be an ongoing practice that I will have to keep. I am four months out from Stage 2, and very happy with my decision. 

gila4936

Shine, who is the surgeon you met with? You can send me a PM if you like. I live in Columbus and I'm thinking you might be talking about my surgeons. 

tlbradyful

Shine, Make sure you get someone who is accustomed to dealing with difficult situations. I did not have enough belly fat so I also went to NOLA where Dr. Massey was able to get 3 flaps from my DIEP incision. Listen to your PS if he is hesitant about the result he can offer. Some situations are very difficult. Don't feel rushed. Take the time to find someone who can best deal with your specific situation. 

Pollyanna, you are expecting too much of yourself. It is really frustrating to still feel bad every day. You will be happy you have done this once you have a little strength back. 

Cherrie, the lipo didn't make a visable difference. Really? I was counting on that. If not, why do it?

LoveAllMyBoys

Hi All --

I hope that everyone here is doing well. I have especially
been thinking of everyone who also had their surgery this past week and hoping
that things went smoothly and that you are all healing well.

My surgery went well. It took 9 hours total for the BMX
and DIEP reconstruction. I don't recall much about the morning of the
surgery. My husband and I got to the hospital just a little after 6am and I
checked in and went off to meet with the nuclear medicine folks. I was
apprehensive about the pain of those injections, but for me they weren't as bad
as some others here have described. After that they took me into pre-op.
I saw my breast surgeon and my oncoplastics surgeon, and he took his
purple marker and drew a road map on my torso. I don't remember much else
that morning. I remember waking up in recovery…and I remember waking up
several times…each after feeling like I had been in a long deep sleep, but from
what I could make out on the clock, I think I was taking lots of micro naps…a
few minutes at a time…after each time I hit my pain button.

I vaguely remember my recovery nurse helping me (making me :-)
get into the recliner on Tuesday morning. …and then mid-afternoon on
Tuesday they moved me up to a room. They just wheeled me in my recliner.
Because of the DIEP flaps, the doctors required that the room temp was
high…78 degrees, in order to maximize dilation of the blood vessels.
Getting back into bed that night (Tuesday) was awful. I think that
was the most painful part of the healing process so far.

I did have some complications during/after surgery and I'm
wondering how common they are…or if any of you had similar experiences.
My blood pressure got very low during the surgery…so they gave me extra
fluid to raise it…but then I had excess fluid outside my lungs (pleural
effusion) which made it hard for me to inflate my lungs and breathe. The
result was that my oxygen level was low and I felt very week. I'm doing
much better now. My blood pressure is still lower than usual, but better
than it was…and I am finally making good progress working on the incentive
spirometer. I am trying to make sure that I'm eating, even though I
don't feel much like it, because I know that if I don't eat, that will also
play games with my blood sugar and energy level…and I'm trying to keep all of
that stable…plus I know I need the food/energy to heal.

Anyway, my nurses in the hospital were all great…and I liked
hearing the "swishing" sound when they checked the pulse-ox on my
flaps. It reminded me of hearing my boys' heartbeats when I was pregnant.

The first few days I was in the hospital I didn't even look at my
incisions or my new breasts. I finally asked one of the nurses how big my
new girls were. :-) …and I took more glances at my new girls and my
incisions as I started using the bathroom (there was a mirror) and as the
doctors /nurses looked at them. Yesterday afternoon I looked down and I
realized that I have cleavage…and today, I finally took a good look. I’m very
excited about how good the new girls look…and I am looking forward to being
able to buy new bras. (I was very large,
34G, before my surgery. I am probably a
C or D now…which means that I will have a much better selection of pretty
bras…YEA!!).

I finally left the hospital Saturday night. We got a recliner so I’ve got a spot in the
livingroom and my diningroom table has been transformed into a nurse’s
station…meds all lined up. 

I have my first post-op appointment with the oncoplastics
surgeon tomorrow. He is super nice and I
am looking forward to seeing him. I’m
hoping he is as happy with my progress as I am.
...and I’m also hoping that maybe he will take some of my drains. I will be VERY excited if that
happens!!

I am slowly trying to catch up on everyone’s posts…so more to
follow…

goldie4040

Hi all.  Welcome Shine.  Sounds like the ladies all got you up to speed on what should come next for you.  Glad you found us.

Teacher, glad you are feeling better about stage 2.  Personally, I can't wait for stage 2.  I want to look complete again asap.

Polly, I think the sweating has something to do with our bodies trying to regulate after the heavy anesthesia. I sweated for weeks.  I kept a pack of fresh wipes by my recliner, and was constantly freshening up.  I am 7 weeks out and feel like the anesthesia and most of it's side effects are over.

Well, went to see my PS about my wound today.  He called in the antibiotics last Friday, saw him today and he debrided the tummy wound and now, guess what? You got it, wet to dry packing until this small area heals.  I already did it once myself to practice.  Not too bad.  He told me to continue to do what I want.  He still feels I a not going to burst open.  Considering how tight I was pulled, I guess I am lucky this is all that happened.  I told him I will not delay my stage 2.  He said he could revise my tummy if I waited a bit longer.  At this point, I don't think I care about it that much (looks wise), just get these foobs looking okay. But, as time goes on, and I am grateful the tummy is healed I probably will care. 

Oh happy day!!!! LOL.  I just got to laugh at this point. Really. 

So, my niece Lili found a way to look at herself.  Teenagers!!!!!  Her mother has been camped out in her room for over a week waiting and watching Lili in her medical coma.  There are no mirrors on burns wards.  Well, when her mom left the room she took a selfie of herself with her mom's IPAD. Well, she took it better than I would have. She used come choice words. Got mad, and told the doctor he better make this right. That's our Lili.  Her father finally got there after 2 days of travelling, and his worst fear, facing Lili for the first time, went much better than he expected.  She has spunk and attitude, and now has him as a captive audience. He will be watching the whole Walking Dead series with her, starting tonight. As bad as this is, there will be some bonding going on, which this particular family needed.  Both parents are PH'd professor's who are always busy travelling, lecturing, writing books, etc.  Now, she has them all to herself.  I hate that it took this tragedy to bring them all together with a common cause, but it could be the good thing that comes out of the bad. 

lahela

Goldie, great to hear that Lili is such a tough girl!

I huuuuuuuuuuurt. Between my legs from the grafts really stings (and they shaved me! That was a surprise when I looked down there!), hip scar revisions are so tender. Can't feel the nipples, of course, just an occasional nerve pain. Heavily bandaged until the unveiling on Friday. They let me come home, so hubby dug out all the pillows - it sucks to be back sleeping again!

I hope Sammy and Dee are doing well!

The1toC

Shine welcome. We all love questions so don't be shy about asking anything that occurs to you.

Teacher glad you are feeling better!

Polly each day is a new one to do and feel as best you can given the circumstances. Sounds like you might be due for a pitty party to honour your dad and your own strength and endurance.

LoveAMB sounds like you are doig well. Make sure some of your food intake is protein to help that fluid/electrolyte balance and get fluids back in the compartments they are supposed to be in.

Goldie your Lili has spunk! Good thing given what she is going through.

Oh lahela sorry you are hurting. Where are those pain meds?? Just remember its temporary.

Thoughts for successful surgery and good healing to all the new flappers this week.

The1toC

i am heading downstate for my 6 wk follow up with PS and hopefully talk about/p,an/schedule stage 2. I have questions mostly about permissions for activities (weights, biking, hiking, rollerblade). Anything else you think I should be discussing?

goldie4040

Lahela, so glad you hear you are on the other side!!!!  Yes, that lipo hurts on the thighs.  In a week you should be fine.  Rest, relax.  You will bounce back so much faster this time.  I can't wait to hear how you like everything.

1toC. sounds like you have everything covered.  Just keep added to that list anytime something pops in you head.  If you are anything like I am these days you will forget on your way to write it down...lol.  I am doing everything within reason now, and I am 7 weeks out.  Everything seems to take more effort and tires me out much easier, but with each day I can do more.  Like tonight, I cleaned up the kitchen after dinner without having to sit down for a couple of minutes to get my momentum back.  It all comes back.  I think just the business of living is the best physical therapy.  Of course, there are some special cases (frozen shoulder, cording, etc.) that need PT, but truly just getting back to normal seems to be the best medicine. I am thinking about some PT because my pec muscles just need some extra attention after having implants under them for a while. I don't know how hard, or little to work them.

lahela

Goldie, I didn't have lipo - they took skin grafts from the inner thigh, right along the panty line, to build my nips, so I have 2" scars there. Can't wear underwear and I walk like I've been riding a horse! LOL!

nihahi

Congrats on the nips, Lahela....sorry for the discomfort, though!! Finish line approaches girl....hang in there!

Goldie...sounds like your niece has what it takes to get through this....good for her!

It also sounds like you are doing so much better, too. How is that iron bra sensation now??? Fading I hope!!!