Another day in the park...

jajjaaj

I was diagnosed with a large and aggressive carcinoma tumor a few weeks before my youngest son's wedding that will require surgery, chemo, and radiation. While a bit in shock, I'm not all that concerned. Maybe it is because I have already been through the worst. My 21-year old daughter passed suddenly due to a ruptured tumor on her pancreas. Three years later, my husband was diagnosed with esophageal cancer that nearly killed him. Knowing the odds for PC and EC, I got this. I almost feel fortunate that it isn't one of those cancers or some flesh eating bacteria.

I put off saying anything to my children because of the wedding. Did not want to taint my son's wedding happiness or that of the other kids. Everyone was so happy and excited he was marrying his longtime sweetheart, a wedding that was in the planning mode for over a year. The morning after and with everyone gathered at my oldest son's home, it made telling them pretty convenient. They are all too aware of the "C" word and I knew they would be devastated. I'm a realist, and think my survival chances are great. So with a few added stats and a bit of joking, my youngest was not taking the bait. She gave me her stern look, and said, "Mother, I am not laughing." I have to admit, my greatest challenge is not fighting the disease, but keeping my children motivated and optimistic. I so worry about them.

Now that the festivities are over, I'm researching everything I can find on BC. I want to be prepared and educated. I'm feeling a bit sheepish though; had no idea there were several types of breast cancer. It seems I did not ask enough questions and do not have a copy of my pathology report to review. I will need get the additional info in the morning as surgery is scheduled for Thursday.