Self-Employed Survivors

cfdr

There are a couple of threads on the boards for people returning to work after (or during!) treatment. I'm starting this thread to see if there are any others out there who are self-employed and struggling. Or, not struggling!

My story:

I am a graphic designer/web designer who has been in business for myself for 8 years and work out of my home. This was a godsend during treatment...flexible schedule, no boss to beg for time off. During chemo I was able to focus on healing and resting, not on trying to put up a good front at the office. I have good insurance on my husband's policy.

My first year post-treatment has been tough. Lots of fatigue and chemo brain. I also find that whereas I used to be very focused and self-disciplined, now I'm lazy and unfocused and unmotivated. I seem to have lost my edge. On the other hand, I'm much less anxious than I used to be...part of that might be the lexapro I started during treatment, but I also think that it's been a psychic shift, to not worry as much about tomorrow and instead, to enjoy today.

Sometimes I enjoy today a little too much. It's soothing to watch the birds at the bird feeder rather than go upstairs and start on my work day!

What's your story?

beth1965

CFDR i am feeling much like you right now. I do not seem to have the same motivation as i did. I do have some days that i feel on the ball and productive workwise and then other days it is a struggle to get myself doing absolutely anything towards my work. I definately agree with the birds at the bird feeder interest compared to work most days.

I am an Artist i paint many things and one part of my business (the biggest part) is custom orders i paint requested designs on everything you can think of. I find i am taking custom orders again but tend to feel to overwhelmed to start working on them. Like i make the design for the item and then come to a complete stop for some reason. Once i actually get going on the order i am fine and thouroughly enjoy my work but its as i said i need a jump start to begin.

I was also lucky that i work from home mostly. So i was able to set my own schedule during treatment i feel very lucky for this. I closed my internet shops on and off and only sold already made items and just painted canvas paintings for my own enjoyment and pleasure no pressure or deadlines. I have not done this in years it was nice.

I also agree about the less anxious part i find i am very relaxed most of the time. TOOOOO RELAXED

I have an order i am looking at as we speak that i have not begun yet apparently i am much more interested in being on here today and petting my spoiled dog for hours on end.

CFDR if i ever get my groove back i would hire you as i will need a web designer within the next few months

cfdr

"Overwhelmed" is exactly how I feel some days. It's getting better bit by bit, but sometimes things that would normally just be an unpleasant chore--e.g. doing my taxes--seems so complex I can't wrap my brain around it. It help to break things into baby steps, but sometimes I have trouble even taking that first step.

Would be happy to talk to you about your website...PM me any time.

mrenee68

cfdr and beth1965 I am a self employed home daycare provider. I have been so blessed to have a daughter who is in college studying child development that has even able to help me run my daycare during this time. My husband carries our health insurance but my income helps support our family. I'm so glad I didn't have to close, it took me years to build my wonderful reputation and that would have crushed me. I do get what you say about lack of motivation. I love my job, but right now it's hard to get up everyday and focus. Thank goodness my daughter is still helping me because yes at times I do feel overwhelmed. Glad to know I'm not alone.