January 2013 surgery

peanutsgal

Hello everyone! I will be having BMX with tissue expanders on January 7. I really hope what I'm reading about the wait is much worse than the actual surgery is true. It gives me hope that this is actually doable!

Ariom

Hi all, I don't actually belong here, but I was diagnosed in November too and have just arrived home after my right side mastectomy and Sentinal Node  Biopsy. My surgery was yesterday, and I was home less than 24 hours after I arrived back in my Hospital room.

I feel great, just a bit bruised, but no pain, and the Sentinal Node tracer that I was terrified of was a non event for me. It truly didn't hurt a bit. I will be 60 next birthday, and really thought I would have a hard time because I am not the fittest person, I have rheumatoid arthritis.

I have only one, albeit a stonking big drain in, but it isn't putting out much so I have been told that my Surgeon will call me in a few days and meet me back at his office, which is already closed for the holidays, to remove it asap.

I have to tell you all that the waiting was by far the worst part of this, it was brutal. The surgery is so refined now that the recovery is fast. The anaesthetics are brilliant, and my scar is neat and will fade in time. I am not going to reconstruct at this time. I was wide awake within a couple of hours, eating a meal and calling friends and family.

I know it is hard to believe that this surgery will be a thing of the past very soon for each of you. Try not to go into it terrified like I did. It just wasn't worth the angst.

Tamiami

Well said Destiny71~

I've done sooo much reading here as well, and have found comfort in being better prepared and organized.  I'd like to send a thank you out to all of those before me that have contributed to the wealth of information on this board!

Lbwagner69

Hello,

I am so happy to find this post. I just found out yesterday that my DCIS has recurred. I am meeting with the surgeon on the 27th to discuss procedure....I am hoping to schedule a Bilateral mastectomy in January. I hope to keep in touch as my date is confirmed. I actually have no idea exactly what kind of surgery I will have...I am still a little cloudy from receiving the news yesterday, but I know I will be in good hands. God Bless everyone.



Laurie

Mirmirpanda

Thank you Ariom! I am having a mastectomy of my right breast and lymph nodes on January 8th with immediate reconstruction. The waiting is horrible. I am super nervous about surgery, but your post made me feel better.



Thank you for posting.

Ariom

I am so glad to have heard from you Mirmirpanda. I promise you it isn't even close to what you are expecting. Fear is an all consuming thing. Fear of the unknown is debilitating. I wish you all the very best for your future, and would love to hear how you are doing afterward.

You are in a fabulous part of the world there. i met many Canadians when I worked for United Airlines here in Australia, and we ground handled Air Canada.

I will be thinking of you on the 8th your time! All the very best!

I have just had a shower and put on my makeup for the first time since getting home, and my husband called me gorgeous!

Mariposa123

I was just told yesterday by my oncologist that they are resuming chemo for two more rounds:-(  (They had stopped early due to Neuropathy- but I am doing somewhat better at this point).  So - that means my surgery probably won't be until early February.  And it means I get chemo tomorrow- so  I will be sick for the holidays.  This whole cancer treatment thing sucks.  Anyway, I may stick around and learn from all of you on this board if that is okay:-) 

 

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Destina

Hi everyone,

I'm new here and this is actually my first post. I don't know how I discovered this site but I knew I needed to be in touch with other women walking this journey. I'm 51 and was diagnosed on Dec 10 and will be having surgery on January 9, 2013. Follow up treatment will be discussed further at my post op appointment on Jan 14, once we know margin and nodal status but at this point radiation and hormonal therapy are on the table. I'm scheduled for a lumpectomy and sentinel node dissection. I have a very good feeling about my surgeon and hope we're making the right choice for this type of surgery. I think given my stats that we probably are (IDC, mucinous type, <1cm, ER+PR+, Her2-, KI-67 at 7%)  but tonight I'm just really wanting to be cancer free...aren't we all? 

In any case, I'm glad I found you all. Thank you, JMRH, for starting this thread. And thank you, NatsFan, for your wonderful list....I really needed to hear that. Thanks to all of you for being here. I wish none of us were, but I am grateful for the sisterhood.

Tamiami

Absolutely it's ok Mariposa123!  I'm sorry to hear about your setback, but maybe February will be the right time for you.  Please know that I'm thinking of you and hoping you can enjoy the holidays

Mirmirpanda

So my best friend is being really negative about my cancer, surgery and chemo. I don't know why. Has anyone else experienced this?!



I was talking to her, very positively, about my surgeons and drs and how optimistic I was about surgery and how I (really) hope I won't lose my hair and she just flat out said how awful surgery would be for me and it's going to take months to heal and I can forget about tattooing and doing hair and picking up my daughter and that with my luck I will lose all my hair and get really sick and have bad reactions to chemo.



It felt like a punch in the gut. I know she's scared for me but wow!

Ariom

Wow, what a tirade from your "friend". I am sorry to say, I think she is scared that something is going to come between you and her.  Fear is a terribly destructive emotion, and people react in very different ways to it. Has she been there, or is this her own fear of what happens that she has thrown at you?

I had people tell me that the surgery was going to be horrific, and that the sentinal node biopsy tracer was the  worst thing you could ever experience. I am usually a very positive motivated person, but all this negativity really got me down. I was consumed by fear for a month before my surgery.

I truly can't understand what people get out of passing on this negativity. I'd rather say nothing than frighten someone about to embark on this journey.

When I found this site I got great advice and empathy from the others that had gone before me. Now I can pass on my experience to others in a positive way.

When my surgeon came to see me yesterday morning he said "go home you're doing really well, don't be an invalid and take to your bed, do what you can, but don't overdo it." That was just 16 hours after I returned from surgery.

I have had no problem showering, washing my hair, doing my makeup, making a meal, tidying up. I have done my arm exercises which I will be doing religiously, I don't want any shoulder restrictions, or the dreaded LE.

Sure there will be some restrictions for a short while, but that's all it will be. You will be Tattooing, doing hair and lifting your daughter in no time. This kind of surgery is so refined now. I can't speak for the Chemo, but there are many others here who can tell you all about that too.

Try not to engage in the negative stuff, just know that you will come out the other side of this and the fear will have been for nothing.

I'd love to hear about your tattooing, I am assuming it is cosmetic tattooing, or are you a tattoo artist? I am considering doing some ink on my chest later on. Take care!

Tamiami

Mirmirpanda~

Brush it off of you can...stay positive!  I have no idea why she would have said these things to you, but the best thing you can do for yourself is to try to forget about it.  This is your journey and you get to make the rules!!  xxoo

Tami

Tamiami

Ooops...I forgot to say that I'm a hairstylist too! 

NatsFan

Hi Ladies - I wanted to check back to see how you were doing.  I'm impressed with how much you all are supporting each other.  I remember how lost and frightened I felt in the beginning, and how important it was to spend time on BCO with women who knew exactly what I was going through.   I just want to let you know that you're a lot stronger than you think.  And, as Ariom says, the fears and thoughts we have before going through this often tend to be worse than the actual process.  Don't let your imaginations run away from you - deal with what you have to deal with now, and worry about the next step later.  A great thing someone said to me when I was first diagnosed was "Don't go there until you get there" - meaning don't let your mind run wild with "what ifs".  Just concentrate on what is coming up in the immediate future, and let the more distant future take care of itself.  Most of the time the terrible things we imagine never happen anyway, so all you've done is waste precious energy worrying for nothing.  That advice pretty much saved my sanity.

Mirmir - Yikes!!!  I think that "friend" of yours gets one warning - "I'm going through a lot right now.  I've done a lot of research and am confident in my doctors and the course of treatment they are recommending.   It upsets me when you bring up these negative scenerios and I would prefer that you give me your support now."  If she is unable to do that and continues to be Nancy Negative, then you need to pull away.  Negative people will drag you down and you can't have that right now.  Cancer is like that - some friends and family that you expected to be there for you will bitterly disappoint you, but on the other hand you'll find that others that you don't expect will step up to the plate and be there for you.  

MMSS - yes, this area has changed!  I grew up in Kensington, back in those pre-Beltway days when going to the county fair in Gaithersburg was a day trip out to the country! Now Gaithersburg is considered a close-in suburb.  Go figure.   

Hopex3

Mirmir: that is too bad about your friend. Maybe she is so scared that she really doesn't know how to react other than being negative. My very best friend was not negative but got angry with me for dumb stuff. She even told me she didn't know how to behave with this news. So, I got her more involved with my care. She came to one of my chemo sessions and that totally turned her around. She even thanked me for letting her come and that she felt so much better after seeing what the chemo is all about. Now, she is there with me every step of the way.



It is amazing people who you were friends with pull away. We have about three sets of friends that we have had for years that we have heard nothing from. Yet, people who we were friends with years ago and kinda lost touch have come back into our lives. Even strangers of these friends are sending cards.



This path that none of us want to be on is certainly an eye opener!

Have a great day Ladies!

mrenee68

I am scheduled January 23 for my left side exchange and right side lift. My PS said he will also lipo my stomach to fill in any areas that need addressing. Kind of excited, but scared at the same time. Good luck to everyone have surgery in January.

JRMH

Hi everyone. Sorry I have been MIA. My husband and I have both been sick. In fact we are on the way to the doctor but I want to check in. I will read through the posts and update as needed, hopefully tomorrow. Sorry I have fallen behind! Definately will get caught up ASAP!

Mirmirpanda

Thanks again Ariom, and yes I am a tattoo artist and I fully support anyone thinking of getting a tattoo!!! I myself have my celebration tattoo all planned. Haha. I'm not havin nipple reconstruction. I'm just getting a really kick ass tattoo over the area



Thank you Tamiami, I love being a hair stylist. Sometimes it's overwhelming, but I'm my own boss and even a bad day can be better than most people's good days



Thanks NatsFan. Your post was great. I don't know what's up with her. I know she's stressed out lately with her boyfriend, her roommate, family, school and work. She may have just taken it out on me. Doesn't make it ok. We're goin to have coffee soon and I plan on bringing it up.



Thank you Hopex3. I like that you brought your friend to chemo. I didn't even know someone could come with you!!! I think I would love to have her accompany me. I am still afraid of telling people. When my dad told people about his cancer he did lose some friends, even some he knew from school, work mates that have known him for 20+ years. He passed last year, but fought really aggressive pancreatic cancer for just over 3 years! Funny enough, I haven't heard from my mom since I told her about my cancer. She cried when I told her, I'm sure she's having flash backs to my dad being sick. I'm just sad I haven't heard from her much, I use to hear from her every couple days, especially since the birth of my daughter. I'm a bit afraid to ask her about it for fear she'll pull away. She will be here in a few day to spend Christmas with us, I hope she see's that I'm ok and that I'm confident in my surgical/medical team, that I believe in them and myself and that I'm going to kick some serious cancer ass!!!



Thank you to everyone on this site really. For all the stories and wisdom you share. It has truly been a source of strength for me and a light in dark times. Thank you!!!

jebdra

Hi All

I'm pretty new to this site, having found a lump on 13/12, biopsied 18/12, pathology back in less than 24 hours and scheduled for surgery on 7/1/12, so I'm another January girl. (It would have been December if hadn't been for Christmas/New Year)

I have to have a mastectomy, as there are two well separated areas of concern, one of them very close or attached to the chest wall.  I've decided to have a bilateral without reconstruction.  I'm 58 and have no need to flaunt cleavage and I'm really looking forward to being flat chested.  My husband totally supports my decision and is being a marvellous tower of strength. 

Like so many of us I want to thank all the posters - both those that have been there and are showing us by example that we CAN get through this, and those that are sharing the journey with us.  I don't think I could handle this if it wasn't for the knowledge that I'm sharing it with so many other wonderful people.

Jan

Ariom

Hi Jan! So glad you found this site, it is a wealth of information. I am 59, and feel like you about reconstruction. I was a little hesitant to show my husband my wound on Thursday, but he just looked at it and said "Wow! that will heal really well, and you don't need two boobs to be gorgeous!" He's a keeper!

I wish you all the very best for your surgery, and don't hesitate to ask anything you need to on here.

Mirmirpanda, I am very interested in looking at having a tattoo over the area too. I have seen a few on line that are interesting. Do you know of any sites that are worth looking at? I worked in the beauty business for many years, and loved it too. I have always had a fascination for beautiful tattoos, and had my first, and only when I turned 40. Never thought I'd have another, but maybe!

JMRH I hope you are both on the mend. Sorry to hear you've been unwell.

mrenee, good luck for everything on the 23rd, you have a great attitude! WOW, that is tomorrow. You'll be just fine! It will be all over before you know it! Please let us know how you are.

Hopex3, I know what you mean about the missing friends. Most of mine have been amazing, but a few, well, I am hoping it is just the time of year.

Natsfan, wise words from you. Thank you! Grateful that you are taking the time to help all of us newbies!

Mariposa and Destina, how areyou doing? Please let us know how you are doing.

I have had a quiet day today, can't believe my surgery was just three days ago. All is going well, and still no pain to speak of, just a little tired today, but so glad to be over this hurdle.

Take care everyone!

 

Ariom

So sorry, my anaesthetic head has let me down, I thought I was doing well!

I thought it was surgery for you tomorrow mrenee, sorry to have got it wrong.

MMSS

What terrible timing Jan. Somehow getting bad news just before Christmas makes it seem so much worse. I also have a tumor that went into my chest muscle but they gave me hormone therapy before scheduling the surgery and it has shrunk a lot and is totally out of the muscle now. I will have to have radiation after the surgery but am grateful that it responds so well to the hormone therapy that I can escape chemo. Perth is such a beautiful city. I was there for a meeting about 15 years ago and just loved it. Hang in there we can do this. It means so much to have others to share with. What a marvel technology is that being half way around the world is no barrier to instant communication.

JRMH

Okay everyone I updated the list. If I accidentally missed you or the info is incorrect PLEASE let me know so I can edit. I want to make sure everything is complete and correct.

Sorry I was later getting that up than I meant to be! My husband and I both were battling an upper respiratory infection but we are both feeling much better today.

Mariposa- Of course you can join us!

ETA: Another reason I am not necessarily doing the best at keeping up is that my head gets kind of foggy sometimes. I have bipolar disorder and sometimes I have trouble concentrating. I probably should have let someone else start the thread who would be better at keeping it updated and kind of wish I had because you wonderful ladies deserve the thread to be kept up very well.   But I really do plan to do my absolute best!

JRMH

*problem solved

jojo2373

Hi ladies, glad to see so many wonderful women here. Jennifer, hope your better soon and thanks for all your work on thread. I will update you with my surgery date this coming week after my appt on Weds with my surgeon.



Hope all of you enjoy the holidays!

MMSS

Relax Jennifer, you are doing a great job and we are all grateful to you for bringing us together. What a lovely Christmas present you have given us in an otherwise not so hot year. The gift of community is precious and we all celebrate it this holiday season. Let's all take some deep breaths and vow that cancer is NOT going to take away our joy for these next few days.

JRMH

Thank you jojo and MMSS!

I agree with you... let's not let cancer steal our joy!

Tamiami

You are doing a great job Jennifer!  Everyone is busy during the holidays and no one expects anything more from you!  Hop you are feeling 100% soon!

jebdra

Jennifer - don't stress it.  You've done a wonderful job starting and updating for us all.  Particularly with a nasty bug and foggy head.

Just one thing - please don't spread your upper respiratory bug around cyberspace !!!  I don't know about everybody else, but I'm virtually putting myself in seclusion for the next couple of weeks.  Only seeing people who are well (no sniffling children), no visits to shopping centres etc.  I really don't think I could handle it if they had to delay surgery because of some stupid bug I picked up.  I just want this done.

Happy Christmas everybody and lets make January a month when we all kick that damn cancer right where it hurts the most.

Ariom

Totally agree with you about the "bugs" My family were calling me "the hand sanitizer queen". I had little bottles everywhere, and I wouldn't let anyone shake hands with me before my surgery. I was so paranoid that I would catch something and have to postpone the op.

I managed to avoid a really bad bug that was going around here, even sent home one of Colin's attendant carers because she was sick.