DIEP 2013
Comments
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Klanders: thanks for keeping us posted on your recovery. I hope you get some good drugs for the plane ride home.
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Marty, what a great post to Lahela - always finding the positive in the negative, and in the end it always pays off. Thanks for always providing a balance here, and for helping us to think more clearly about all these issues.
Lahela, yes, it sucks that your boss disclosed info that you wanted private, but my experience is that it would eventually have come out somehow. People talk, unfortunately, and it is very hard to prevent them from doing so. When I was diagnosed, I told everybody myself. It helped me to lighten the load, to talk about it, and to get it out of my system. The more I said the words, 'I have cancer', the more I became used to it, and the less scary it became, if that makes any sense at all. We don't want people to pity us, but most people are compassionate about this, and will support you. You don't seem like a 'poor me' character at all, and you will earn the respect of all these people by the way you handle this. If it will make you feel better, maybe write your former boss a short letter expressing your feelings about the breach of privacy so that she can learn from this. Best wishes to you!
Klanders, you are doing great. Have a good flight home tomorrow!
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Lahela,
You have my sympathy. Currently only 3 people outside the personel/medical community know about my condition. I even misled work friends hinting that I was having "female surgery", so they wouldn't wonder why I was gone from work. I agree with the others that it will eventually come out but I too want as much privacy to deal with this disease for as long as I can get. I am assuming that I will have futher treatments such as chemo where I might not be able to hide what is going on as I am now. But I plan on dealing with that when it comes. I am so sorry you are having to deal with people right now on top of dealing with suguries, emotional stuff and all the other things dumped into out lap so suddenly. Hope things get for you soon.
Lahela made a point about not wanting is to be defined by this disease. This is exactly how I feel right now. In fact there is a bit of shame and embarrassment that I have this *again*. I was offhanded and casual the first time since it was stage 0 and the treatment was realatively easy and the prognosis was very positive. Now things are very much different and I feel much less empowered. I just want to deal with this privately. So far those who know are respecting my wishes. If I could go through this entire thing with hardly anyone knowing I would. I just *hate* the fact that I'm now a person with cancer, not just a person. I know it's wrong to feel this way but that is how I feel right now. Plus, I don't want to deal with peoples reaction both positive and negative. I just don't have the emotional strength right now; and I just don't want to be bothered with dealing with how people feel.
I just had to post because this issue something I really feel deeply about and I feel this is the only place I can honestly talk about it.
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Jeannie...shhhh...don't even whisper this to Nihahi...it was an "attle-ray ake-snay."
Lahela, I totally understand your anger. You were trying to be thoughtful and graceful in your departure from your job, and your privacy was stomped on. At the same time, I think Marty and Liefie are right. It's just going to come out. People talk. And trying to keep a diagnosis of breast cancer on the Q.T. makes it shrouded in mystery, which makes people talk even MORE. And like Liefie said, you'll never know who your experience will help when they experience their own BC fandango.
When I went back to work 5 weeks after my DIEP, I pulled all the ladies into my office and took off my shirt. I was pretty much born without a modesty bone in my body, but even then, I knew everyone was curious and I was proud of all it had taken to get where I was. And THIS is breast cancer. Not pink tutus, wild pink wigs, pink spatulas/mixers/you name it. It's recovering from being poisoned, slashed, and burned, growing a new head of hair, napping under my desk occasionally, and being happy to be alive, with amazing surgery to put breast-like creations where my breasts used to live.
My grandma-quarium is all set up today, complete with Aubrey as the wildlife. I have my grandmother's carved oak rocking chair, which means I'm rocking Aubrey in her great-great-grandmother's chair. Isn't life a miracle?
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Dear 2timer, you are totally entitled to your feelings. Each of us deals with this beast in our own way, and we do what we need to help ourselves get through this. That's why these boards are so essential to help us talk about these issues in a safe environment where we can find acceptance, and will not be judged. Big hugs to you!
DebDylan, hope you are okay. Careful now, eh?
Sbe, enjoy rocking that precious little one in that historic old rocking chair - priceless.
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Hi Flappers....been reading, not posting.......yesterday I went to PS office, to get the compression bandages/wrap off from my stage 2 (I had NO lipo this stage, due to tummy work done) .........before I go on, let me just say I realize (mentally, at least) that I am a work in progress, and that I am very bruised AND swollen from the foob centering/lift.....but when all the bandages were off, my foobs had disappeared......well, not completely. (I have always been an AB cup....NEVER had big boobs.....so the new girls were, well, AMAZING to me, because they were a B/C....I actually had boobs! Never mind that they were FOOBS......they were BIGGER, and they were MINE!). And now they are gone.....PS took my elliptical abdominal skin out and pulled boob skin tight over increased volume from tummy. He said " I knew you would react like this.....but I did NOT take out ANY of the tummy VOLUME.....just excised the skin and stretched your breast skin over it......it WILL come back, I promise!" I know I am being shallow and stupid, especially when so many of us struggle with healing issues......I cried all afternoon and evening.....this morning I got up and knew I had to put on my big-girl panties....so I am done with my rant session now.
On the positive side, PS used no mesh, but gave me a procedure just like real tummy tuck, w/o cut muscles. He said my ab muscles were in great shape, and this would be a better fit for me.....and I am flat.......(just wish it was the ONLY place I felt flat!). Not too sore today.....but incision was 7" instead of 4". He probably knew all along it would be that wide, but also knew that I would be very reluctant to re-open ab incision more than 4"..,,,,,(and, he would be right)
So, that is my initial reaction to MY stage 2........ And stage 3 (lipo, and nipples?) is on books for December 3rd.......
The recovery from this stage seems simple...compared to stage 1.
I hope and pray that those who are struggling with wound and healing issues see some genuine progress......and know that you are in my thoughts and prayers everyday. XO
Lahela-I agree. With Marty and Liefie..........you never know......knowing about your situation could save someone else's life..........positive thoughts!
By the way, PS wants me to lose another 10 lbs before stage 3........ I have lost 20........have three months to do it!
Love you all......
Namaste and God Bless. -Jackie -
Sbe-love your grandma-quarium.......... *o*
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Movie, I have always wondered how my PS was going to make this paddle disappear, and you just provided the answer. Wow! Don't know if I like the answer so much though, because I am also small, and certainly don't want to lose what I am soooo very proud of - lol. However, I am glad your recovery is going well otherwise. You will be totally done with everything by the time I have my next (and hopefully LAST!!!) surgery. Will be getting a nipple, and a lift of the healthy one which is still visibly lower than the perky new foob. PS said she would do everything at the same time in January.
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DebDylan, these days very few people actually get nauseous from chemo any more. These days they give you medication which prevents it. You may feel a bit queasy here and there maybe for the first day or two after the chemo infusion, but then it is over. So don't let the fear of nausea influence you decision for or against chemo. It is no big deal anymore. Will it help to put some heat on that contraction to help it relax?
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Liefie
You can leave your paddle flap on your breast if you like, and just have the nipple done over it. Eventually the scars should fade enough it won't matter. I have seen the procedure done several ways, they either do what Movie had done, or they take the dog ears from the ends of you tummy incision, or if you like, there is this awesome video on youtube of a doc making a nipple, and there was no loss of breast volume. But, I think what Movie's doc said is probably correct. The skin will stretch to accommodate the volume inside the foob.
Movie, I am so sorry you aren't 100 percent thrilled with your unveiling, but I bet your foob will expand some again, and you will be happy. Don't forget, there is always fat grafting at the next stage if you want it. Your tummy sounds awesome.
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Hey, Deb, I went through 4 months of TAC chemo (the big guns) without a moment's nausea. No kidding. They gave me gallons of anti-nausea drugs before each chemo round and it did the trick. I was super constipated, but that's another story!
I would get chemo each time on a Wednesday, and the following Friday I'd be tired and achy and cotton-brained. By Saturday it was lifting, and by Sunday I was fine.
Like Liefie said, it's different these days, and it's not like they show it in the movies.
Do you have any leftover valium or ativan? They're pretty good muscle relaxers.
Movie, I'm so sorry you weren't thrilled when the bandages came off. I actually wasn't thrilled either, but my PS explained how there's just more work to do that couldn't be done all in one procedure. I'm not on the books yet but I'm hoping for either November 27 or December 2 for the next, and hopefully last, surgery. And your PS promises you'll be happy with your size, right? Like you said, it's a work in progress.
Off to the Costco. Can I get anybody anything?
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Deb...please be cautious about putting heat on your tummy. Your sensation and circulation is not normal and you could easily do damage. Can you just lie down and rest for awhile? The hardness could also be due to swelling, if you have strained something, again, heat wouldn't be the best choice. Give it some time and rest.
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Aubrey says hello!
Deb, Nihahi, is right. Probably all that's needed is a good lie-down and maybe some tylenol.
NOW I'm going to the Costco.
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Aubrey is too cute for words! Thanks for the smile!
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Deb - unless every of your incisions is completely healed, no hot bath. Don't want to let anything swim in (yuck). Just relax this evening and tomorrow. At 4 weeks out a little run is a big deal. A flexerill or valium if you have them should help.
Movie - so sorry about your boobs. I am sure that they will change. In December, he can take some of the lipod fat and graft it to the boobs to gain volumne. Your plication sounds like mine - no mesh. I gave it 8 weeks before I began to work out.
Catie - is that little baby a redhead? I do need a few things from Costco. Do you ship?
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OH.....MY.....LORD......SHE.....IS.....ADORABLE!!!!!!!
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Can't believe how much Aubrey has grown! So darn cute!
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Aubrey is so cute and changing quickly. Nothing like 'em!
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Seems like that sweet baby just got here, and she is already holding his head up by herself. Too cute!
Have fun at Costco. I go at least once a week.
Deb, I agree. No bath, no heat. Just some mild pain reliever, and rest. You had a long day anyway. You need the rest anyway.
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DebDylan, I am so glad we have knowledgeable people here to give you good advice. I am obviously not savvy about these things, and will apply a hot water bottle to anything - lol.
Sbe, you are clearly having such fun with that baby, and she is just too cute. You make me really look forward to having my own little grandbaby. Just a pity they live in another province, and Canada is such is a big country. Oh well, will be watching for seat sales I guess, and just hop on the plane every so often.
Love Costco too, and always buy way more than I plan for - lol.
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sbe - Aubrey is such a cutie! Wow, they grow way too fast don't they!?!? Did you have lunch at Costco? (from the samples?) LOL You can make a meal out of them sometimes!
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lahela, that is outrageous, and I don't know how things work in Switzerland but in the U.S. that would be grounds for a major lawsuit. Having said that, nothing defines you unless you allow it to. Everyone I know, knows I have breast cancer, but it's just a small piece of my life as far as I am concerned.
klanders, glad you are feeling well and got a good night's sleep last night even. Have a safe flight home!
Marty your post is inspiring. It would be a small ray of happy light in a dark situation, to know that others have been helped by our sharing this experience.
debdylan, thanks for the tip on the liquid silicone, good to know.
sbelizabeth - you gave me a chuckle, how awesome that you are so comfortable with your body! And I love that you have everything all set up to enjoy that baby. She's so cute! All the more special that you have your grandmother's rocking chair, that is truly precious.
I'm feeling great. Tomorrow I think I'm going shopping for a couple of new outfits.
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Aubrey is a cutie!!
Deb- take it easy !
I told everyone I had cancer and wrote a blog! I only did because I was SO caught by surprise that I think others can benifit!
Did alot today.. Now I need to take some meds and relax.
Question: my foobs are so big that I'm sweating under them and am rash-y .... Can I powder? -
Tracy - are your incisions closed under your breasts? I would think as long as the incisions are closed for the most part, it should be okay.
Question from me too: I am really sick of wearing my abdominal binder over my clothes and getting a million questions every day. If I got something like Spanx high rise panties that are for slimming/control, will that be just as good?
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Quick question DIEPPERS.....could I use ice to sooth sore spots after stage 2? PS is in surgery, and I have spot pain (away from incisions) that under normal circumstances I would apply ice to to treat and sooth......muscles seem to be spasm-ing in areas below foobs and off center (away from foobs or incisions)thanks..just found Ativan -going to pop one of these for now......
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Movie, everything I have ever read says so ice or heat. An ativan should be fine.
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Christina
Why not? I have a Spanx binder that just goes from hips to under breast. It's great because you can still go potty without pulling it up and down.
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I wear the binder put on by the hospital under all my clothes.
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I have a question I never asked before, and I thought of it because i just had a cold drink of water. Does anybody else feel the cold going down through your chest after their mastectomy? If so, when you had a delayed diep does that feeling go away? Of all the weird feelings I have had since the bmx this is certainly the least annoying, but I was just wondering.
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I have that cold feeling and I still feel it after diep.
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