December 2012 chemo group

jenjenl

Bren - good luck today, thinking of you!

Jodi767

I started chemo in Dec 2012 and I'm finally posting!! Finished my last round on April 18 (6 rounds total) and I have a good layer of fuzz! My onco dr wants me to see a radiation dr due to the size of my tumor and 3 lymph nodes involved (everything was removed during surgery) so time will tell if I need radiation. Can't be any worse than chemo!! I'll just be glad when the numbness eventually goes away!!

Nicole503

Jodi767 ~ Welcome!  Congrats on being done with chemo!! Let us know whether you end up needing radiation.  Wishing you well!

I'm starting Tamoxifen today.  Not looking forward to it, but since my tumor was super estrogen positive, it is the right thing to do. 

Anonymous

Jodi~~There's a thread on BCO for Spring Rads 2013. You may want to check it out. A lot of great ladies on there who can tell you about radiation. I finish my 12 weekly Taxol on May 17, then a 3 week break and on to rads.



Blessings

Paula

Sandra60

Welcome Jodi ! Rads are a piece of cake compared to chemo . I have numbness too in my armpit from the lymph node removal - not sure it will ever go away though . It really does not bother me though .

Jodi - I will be joining u on the tamox in 2 weeks when I finish rads . It does not seem too bad for most women ! We can compare notes soon



Paula - so glad u are close to finishing !

duckiedee

Good luck today, Bren!

So good to see so many friends finishing chemo. And, Jodi, congrats on having some fuzz! I'm envious... haha! All I have are some stubborn gray hairs that never really turned loose when I had my head buzzed back in December. Funny how my "real hair" gave up and only the grays held on for dear life. Doesn't seem fair somehow. Anyway, I find myself daydreaming about having hair again.

I start radiation next week and then hormone therapy once rads are done. I am post-menopausal. (Just turned 55.) And I meet with my MO in May to discuss which drug I'll be getting. Not looking forward to 5 years or so of hormone therapy, but it is what it is. And I guess I will do whatever I need to to keep this from coming back. I'll be keeping my port until December since I will be getting Herceptin every three weeks till then. I had my first "Herceptin only" infusion this week, and it was a piece of cake! So easy in comparison to chemo.

Hope everyone has a great day today. Thanks for all the support you have given me during all this. I don't post all that often, but I read what others have to say, and this discussion board has been a godsend to me. Thank you, sisters, for keeping me strong! You are all amazing women...

jessica57

Hi anyone and everyone.  I had my 4 treatments of A/C. Now I'm on my 3rd treatment of Taxol.  That didn't go over very well because I had moderate allergic reactions to it.  Not very pleasant.  Have to meet with the onco dr on Monday to determine the course of action.  Has anyone ever experienced an allergic reaction to taxol and does anyone know what other chemo drug they might try and what the SE will be with the next type of drug.  Very discouraged right now because I thought all was well with the taxol. The first 2 treatments were at a slow drip so I handled it very well until the 3rd time when they tried me at the normal drip.  That obviously didn't go over very well with my body!  HELP!!!!

JenMas

Welcome Jodi! I start radiation on Monday and I agree, it can't be worse than chemo!!!

Bren58

Welcome Jodi & Jessica!

I am home from my overnight at the hospital for ALND surgery. Surgery went well and I was fine until abot midnight when the anesthesia wore off and I had severe pain and nausea. After getting pain meds every 2 hours I finally felt better about 8am. Lots of rest over the next week or so. I will get the path results at the end of next week.

Anonymous

Bren~~I'm praying for an excellent report. I remember when I was waiting for the report to come back on my scans to see if BC had spread. I was to see my onc on Monday for the results. On the previous Thursday I was sitting here wondering...what if, what if, what if.........God spoke to my heart, and said, " Is it more difficult for me to heal a stage IV than a stage 0?" Of course not!!! Then he he asked me, " Were you not healed by my wounds?" Of course I was, 2000 years ago. I had complete peace after that.

Bren, I pray that same peace for you. The peace the world doesn't understand!



Blessings

Paula

Bren58

Thank you Paula for your prayers. When I made the surgery appt, I really did not have a peace about it. But over the following 2 weeks the Lord brought verses, people and events into my life that just kept reassuring me that He was in this and that it was going to be ok. By the time I went to the hospital yesterday I was very calm and did have that peace that passes all understanding. I am really not worried about the path report because whatever the outcome I know that He is in that too.

Nicole503

Bren58~ Wishing you swift healing this weekend.  I so admire your equanimity about your path results.  I am praying for reassurin news.  Take good care.

Sandra60

Bren - so glad your though that surgery and on he mend . I am praying for your good path results as well . I too have the power of Him helping me .... Nothing like the peace that gives one .



I was told today I have 2.5 more weeks of rads - thought it was only 2 weeks boo hoo.

I have a mild skin irritation -kind of itches - upper part of my Breast - told to us hydro cortisone cream 1% and it is working . Other than that just a bit of dizziness and mild fatigue . I am still exercising evey day though as this seems to give me more energy .

Happy weekend to all ! Going to my sons last swim meet of high school - bittersweet !

donster

Hi ladies,

Bren, I hope all your news is good news tomorrow. 

It sounds like radiation is going well for everyone.  I have also finished 27 rounds and have just 1 more round tomorrow and then the final 5 boosts.  It is very exciting to be so close to the end, but it is also full of fear and anxiety that this daily treatment is coming to a close. Like you Sandra, I had very minimal side effects from the rads. Nothing a little aquaphor, calendula, aloe and hydrocortisone couldn't handle :P  It surprised me though how the skin holds up for so long and then suddenly it becomes angry...

Nicole,  I started Tamoxifen about 6 weeks ago and it is going well with minimal SE.  The first couple of weeks I experienced pain in my thighs (like I was tackled in a game of football from both sides) but that went away and other than hot flashes, no other SE's have appeared. I hope your experience is similar.

I think about you gals often.  Sending everyone ((hugs)).

FriendGwen

Hi everyone! For those of you doing radiation what is the difference between the boosts and the regular sessions? Just want to prep myself as I found the worse part so far was day one when I didn't know how long I was going to be on the table.

My fuzzy hair is coming in more and more in a mix of brown, gray and white. I lost about 80% of my eyebrows but am seeing the regrowth coming up. It's like watching a garden bloom!

Bren - sending good thoughts your way. Whatever life throws your way you will come out strong.

jenjenl

Regular are at certain grays and then the boosts are stonger and directed to the scar line.  My regular is 180 grays and my scar boosts are 200 grays.

I had #1/33 today. 

Had a complete mental breakdown yesterday but feeling better today.  Boy did I cry like I just found out I was dx. 

Bren - any news?  Hope all is well

kslansky

Most of last week was a breakdown week. My hand and arm started swelling and hurting. It was just the straw that broke my back!



Had 1st PT appt today. Have stage 1 lymphedema, cording and webbing going on. Hate having to deal with this but looking forward to some relief!!!



I meet my RO tomorrow. I hope to walk away with a plan.



I've got grey fuzzies on top and my eyelashes and eyebrows are coming back!!!

Bren58

No news yet on the path report. BS said he should have it by the end of the week. I don't have too much pain from the ALND, but a lot of discomfort. Mostly where the drain comes out. I will be so glad to get rid of this thing, but my output has to be under 30 for 3 days in a row in order for them to remove it. I finally had the guts to look under my arm last night to see what it looks like. Wow, there is quite a cavern up under my arm! I am on the thin side and didn't have a lot of fat tissue in that area to begin with. jenjen, kslansky, sandra and anyone else, Is this what yours looks like too? The BS said there would be  a small depression under there, this just looks like more than I was expecting. Of course I may be overreacting since I can't get my arm up very far to take a really good look.

Kslansky I am so sad that you are having to deal with LE already. Hopefully your PT can help you with that and the cording and webbing. I had the cording after my BMX in 2000 and the PT was able to help greatly with the pain and get me back to full range of motion.

We all seemed to weather the chemo, but every new treatment plan seems to bring with a new set of emotional hurdles and require new reserves of strength. We should all be some amazingly strong women by the time this is over!

duckiedee

I thought I was the only one feeling sad and weepy at this point. Once I got through the chemo I thought it would be smooth sailing from there on. Wrong! The planning and simulation appointments with the radiation oncologist totally stressed me out! I felt so dehumanized as I had to lay on that table with my arms up over my head and my bare chest exposed for all to see. The tattoos were painful to me, and I hate having sharpie pen markings and stickers all over my chest. So many people were in my face and bombarding me with information. Not a very warm and fuzzy experience to say the least! Ugh... Is it just me???

I went for my first radiation treatment this morning, and it wasn't so bad. (Easier than the planning part of this phase of treatment!) But - as someone who has probably the palest and most sensitive fair skin on the planet - I am nervous about how my skin will hold up over 6 weeks of daily radiation treatment.

I think I am just so tired of pain and side effects and medications and doctors... I am just feeling battle-weary, I guess. Sorry to be a "downer" today. I try really hard to be positive and upbeat, but I'm just not feeling it today. And this is sometimes the only place where I can vent. Thanks for understanding. And I hope that everyone else's experiences with radiation are better than mine have been so far.

Nicole503

duckiedee  You don't have to apologize for being battle weary!

I don't see you as being a downer. 

I see you as someone reaching out a hand for support.

I'm happy to hold it.

Wishing you some rest and ease today.

Bren58

Duckie, battle weary is such a good way to put it! And we all have those days that are worse than others. No need to apologize! From those first frighteneing words "you have cancer", we have been thrown into a battle to overcome our shock and deal with our emotions. We have navigated a minefield of treatment options to find the right ones, dealt with the physical and psychological effects of chemo, surgery and rads, not to mention putting on a smile and keeping some of our darkest fears to ourselves so as not to burden those around us. Sometimes I feel like I am just being swept along by a tidalwave I have no control over. Other days I feel like I can handle it pretty well.

I remember after my first dx with BC, it was about a year after my surgery that I realized I felt "normal" again. And I didn't even have chemo or rads then! I needed to grieve the loss of my boobs and come to terms with my new body. I had to heal mentally as well as physically. I was only 41 then and no one around me had  BC. I felt very out of place around my friends because no one could understand what I was going through. Eventually life went back to normal and I rarely thought about cancer. My hope for all of us is that we can heal and move on, stronger and more courageous,  and have many more happy, cancer free years!

duckiedee

Bren and Nicole - Thank you so much for your kind words. I have really been struggling today, and I guess I just needed someone to say that they understand. Thanks for being there for me and helping me get through today. I finally allowed myself a good cry. Then a sweet friend called just to check on me. That was nice. I spilled my guts and honestly told her how I was feeling.

I am simply exhausted. From everything - chemo, now radiation, aches and pains everywhere, haggling about medical bills, waiting on test results, worries about how my skin will hold up over the next 6 weeks. I am ready to burn every hat I own and have some hair again. I am sick of fluid retention, seromas that need draining, feeling short of breath just from walking down the block, thigh muscles that burn when I climb a flight of stairs. You get the idea...

Anyway - tomorrow is another day, and maybe my inner tough chick will come back. Because I missed her today. A lot.

Thank you for your nice words and for giving me some encouragement when I sorely needed it. Yes - I am battle weary. I guess even the best soldiers get it from time to time. Here's to a fresh new start in the morning. Soldier on, dear ladies...

Sandra60

Bren and Duckledee - really feel your pain - this post chemo part is better but not easy all the time . Bren - I had 8 lymph nodes come out with my sentinal node - surgeon did not intend to take tha many they just came out with the fat when he had to go deep for the sentinal node - sorry for the tmi . So I did not really have ALN surgery . I have numbness in my armpit but full range of motion but no real depression under there . You are a stong lady so you should heal up very well .

Duckledee - the rads are a bit hard on the skin and with your being lighter you may see more sensitivity . I am more olive and doing ok - I have 2.5 more weeks to go - woo hoo ! Once u get into the routine it will go by fast . I just look at it as part of my job to make sure my family does not have to deal with a recurrence on me later !

I started the tamox Friday and so far so good .

Cyber ((((hugs ))) to all my fellow warriors !

Nicole503

One of the January chemo sisters shared this video on the FB page they started and I loved it so much I want to share it with my December sisters.  I remember when I was pregnant, my midwife encouraged me to think about the first 3 months of my baby's life as the 4th trimester ~ a continuation of the pregnancy with the baby outside your body but still intimately connected through nursing and lots of skin contact.  I think a similar approach should be taken to breast cancer treatment ~ that the first few months after chemo/radiation are as important an aspect of treatment for healing the spirit as surgery/chemo/radiation is for killing the cancer.

A little series of video clips of women discussing thoughts after treatments are all over...  Thought it was relevant and poignant.  Didn't scare me to watch it, so I thought I would share.  http://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/avon_foundation_breast_center/treatments_services/survivor_care/reducing_recurrence.html

Happy Weekend everyone!

donster

Wow Nicole.  I just read your post and watched the video.  Thank you for sharing.  It was exactly what I needed and I suspect others feel the same.  I am finishing radiation tomorrow and then I will continue Tamoxifen for the next 5 years.  This is a really strange time.  I feel like I have been running on adrenaline for 7 months.  I have never looked back.  Suddenly I am at the end and I am looking back and going HOLY COW!!!  I have been to hell and back and suddenly it is very overwhelming.  I did not expect to feel this way.  I found great comfort in knowing that other women had similar experiences.  Yes, others around me are excited for me and asking me how I will celebrate tomorrow.  I am feeling so emotionally drained right now, not physically, emotionally.  I am reminding myself that there will be years to celebrate and I don't have to do anything tomorrow but relax and smile that I reached the finish line. 

Nicole503

donster ~ I felt the same way when I finished chemo.  You are wise in your approach.  Wishing you a relaxing finish line.  Glad the videos brought you as much comfort as they did me.

Bren58

Had our meeting with the BS late yesterday and got the path results. Looks like the chemo did its job and there was no cancer in any of the 29 level one nodes that were taken!  There was some residual DCIS that was in the remaining breast tissue under the arm so they removed that too. So with clear nodes it looks like I might be able to skip rads! I still have to do PT, Herceptin, Estrogen supressors, etc. But I feel like the hard part is finally over. It has been a long 9 months!

Congrats to those who have reached the finish line. Hope you are all doing well and are able to begin looking forward to a more "normal" life. Now we just have to wait for our hair, brows and lashes to come back

Nicole503

Bren - This is GREAT NEWS!!!!  Thanks for sharing.  I have been thinking about you and my heart is happy that chemotherapy has been so effective for you.  

PeggySull

Been,



I am so excited about the great results! You've been so supportive of others. Thank you.



Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy your triumph!



Peggy

Sandra60

Bren - I am so very very happy to hear your wonderful news - whoo hoo!!! You've been so helpful to all of us on this board with your even temperament and great advice - Thank You !

On to "normalness " for u and all of us !!!

My rads will be done next week - a bit soar but nothing compared to chemo !

Tamoxifen giving me hot flashes - but no other se's - woppee !!