Anyone NOT do fertility preservation before starting chemo?

Youngwithbc

I am hugely stressed right now over this whole fertility thing. I will be starting chemo soon, and there may be a possibility of doing embryo freezing before starting my treatment. However, the timing will be very tight and I may need to go on certain drugs to speed things up...

I have not yet decided if I'm going to do it or not. Not only is it very expensive, but the idea of all the shots, tests, monitoring, retrieval prodcedure, pretty much back-to-back with the chemo... And also the idea of putting so many more drugs into my body with possible side effects and complications and lots of unknowns... it's just really really making me anxious. It all seems like too much to handle right now... another fun thing young cancer patients get to deal with that others may not have to! I've been really feeling the whole "this is so unfair, why is this happening to me" kind of emotion lately, which I hate. I just sometimes feel like I am the only one going through this and it feels really lonely and frustrating. Especially when I see photos online of various friends and acquaintances who are pregnant or just had a baby... it is so hard not to feel envious of their lives right now.

I do want a child so badly and I pray so much that after all this is done, my fertility won't be compromised and I'll be one of the lucky ones. You just never know, and that is what scares me... but I don't know if it's enough to go through all the fertility stuff right now and rush it, when I'm not sure I feel comfortable or ready to do it.

I guess I'm just wondering if there are other young ladies out there who chose not to do the embryo or egg freezing and how you came to that decision? And I'd also love to hear happy stories of women who got pregnant naturally after chemo and horomone treatments... I could use a bit of hope, if you are out there!!!

Clearly, I am having a bit of a bad day... week... eek!

stride

Oh for Pete's sake, the first response is an advertisement? I'm bumping this in the hope that somebody appropriate will respond.

The only thing I can offer is just to say even getting your eggs frozen would not be a guarantee of having a baby. I have watched a couple of friends (with no health problems) go through expensive fertility treatments, only to have miscarriages or no pregnancies.

I also know someone who had leukemia, got treated with chemo and thought she would never be able to get pregnant. Two years later she had a healthy, handsome baby boy.

So if you have to make a choice because of time, expense or any other reason, I'd recommend putting your own health first. 

Youngwithbc

Thank you... surprised no one else responded, but maybe not that many people are dealing with the same issues. I think I am definitely leaning towards not doing it, it just feels like too much to take on and something is telling me not to do it. Such a hard decision to make, impossible really, since I don't know what the outcome will be in the end, but I'm hopeful it will all work out and that in one way or another, I will be able to have a child. Right now my biggest concern is just getting healthy and getting on with my life and enjoying my marriage which hasn't been all that fun so far due to this icky breast cancer thing!

Thanks Stride for sharing the story of your friend who had the baby on her own... it is nice to hear

Krissy5

I was diagnosed exactly one week ago and am also battling with the decision to get my eggs frozen or not.  My doctors want to start chemo within 2-3 weeks, which puts everything on a very tight, stressful timeframe.  I am currently single.  From the research I've done, it sounds like embryo freezing is typically more successful.  If you are certain you want to have a family, why would you not want to give yourself a better chance to make that happen?  So many people have trouble having children even without adding chemo to the mix.  

My cancer is ER+ and the clinic my doctor referred me to says that their methods would be safe considering this.  I still worry.  Has anyone else done this before?  Has anyone on here gotten pregnant after un-freezing eggs?  Supposedly this is not considered an "experimental procedure" anymore, but part of me wonders if I would be doing this just for my own piece of mind and not necessarily because it will result in me getting pregnant in the future.  Even then, maybe it would be worth it so I can maintain some sense of hope.  

Thoughts?  Suggestions?  Advice? 

mrszinnz

I am 32.  I elected not to do fertility preservation.  I have a large tumor and am strongly ER+ and PR+ and I didn't want to delay my treatment.  I very much wanted to have children.  My surgeon advised me that it is still possible to have children after treatment.  I am not sure if I will because of the ER+ and PR+ situation.  I will also take Tamoxifen.

You have to do what feels right for you.  I was also assured that the small delay in treatment would not harm my outcomes and would not cause an issue.

I had my second AC treatment last Friday and got my period yesterday.  I have heard that some women continue to get periods during treatment. 

comingtoterms

Hello Youngwithbc,

I wanted to let you know that there is always hope even though right now it may feel difficult to find it. I am neither young nor did I preserve my fertility, but at 52 years of age, I am still menstruating despite A/C/T chemo at the age of 48.  I send blessings and white healing light your way as you make a decision no young woman should ever have to make. Namaste. Tammy

sakura73

I did fertility preservation but it didn't really work (the day I found out it hadn't worked still ranks as the worst day in my life) and in the end I didn't need it. I conceived naturally 14 months after chemo ended, and my son was born healthy and is now 15 months old.

During chemo I had Zoladex shots to shut down my ovaries to try and protect them and though I can't say for sure that it was that which protected me, I am glad I did it. The younger you are the better your chance of your fertility returning. See a naturopath too for advice during and after chemo. I did and she helped heaps.

Feel free to PM me: I don't come here much any more but would be very happy to offer any further infomrairton or advice. You are in the most horrible phase of things, before treatment starts. It does get better from here, I promise.

kmadigan

I'm turning 34 tomorrow and was diagnosed with Stage3, HER-2+, PR &ER+ breast cancer on Sept. 28.  I had a double mastectomy on Oct. 15 and just started chemo on Nov. 12 (exactly 4 weeks later).  Everything moved so fast and I was told I should meet with a fertility specialist if I wanted to preserve my eggs, but when I met with him it just didn't feel right for me.  They said they prefer to freeze embryos instead of just eggs because they have a higher success rate, but then the decisions about what to do with the embryos if I don't use them, cost, and the thought of trying to squeeze the physical process in before my chemo was too much.

I also had a second opinion about my treatment plan with one of the top oncologists at UPenn and he said he felt there was a good chance I woud not go into early menapause because of my age - not sure of how old you are.  Apparently, the closer you are to menapause naturally, the more likely chemo will push you there.

I will be on hormone blockers following chemo & radiation for 5 years, which puts me at about 40 when I could try to get pregnant - some women go off the hormone blockers early to try and get pregnant, but I don't think I want to take any chance this will come back.

So that is where I'm at with this, but with all of that said, you have to do what is right for you.  You are going to be faced with many decisions through this process that leave you questioning yourself.   I think one of the things we all need to learn on this journey is to trust ourselves.  Someone else's choice may not be right for us.  If you decide not to do the fertility treatment, know in your heart it was what YOU needed in this moment so you could focus on beating this.  Ultimately, whatever you need to help you mentally be as strong as possible is what is right for you.  Best of luck as you move forward!

christina0001

For me, this was one of the worst parts of being diagnosed. DH and I were planning on trying to conceive in the near future, but then I was diagnosed. My oncologist brought up fertility options, but I decided against it. I was too overwhelmed with trying to understand all this cancer stuff, plus the cost is so high. We decided we would just get through cancer, and see what happened. It broke my heart that I might not be able to conceive, but slowly I am accepting that. I have always been open to adoption so I knew for me, there was an acceptable back-up plan, even if it was not my first choice of how to have children.

Having said all that, now I am six months post-chemo. I have not resumed menstruation. But I am much more at peace with not having children biologically, if that is how it turns out.

Youngwithbc

Thanks everyone for sharing your stories, it really helps. I didn't go through with the preservation, it was just too much to take on and I wasn't prepared to deal with any more risks or complications right now. I think it's a very personal choice. It is helpful to hear from you women who also did not choose to do it, but made the right choice in one way or another. Makes me feel a bit less alone in all of it. Taking it off the table really allowed me to focus on other things though and put me in better spirits, so I do feel it was the right choice for right now. Time will tell I guess.

kiwikid

hi

I'm also 34 & I'm meeting my MO next week to talk chemo & hormone treatment. ive already decided to save myself and worry about babies later if i want too. the dx is enough to cope with atm.

all the best

kk

Sunrise79

Hi, I was diagnosed last November at 32. I chose not to have fertility preservation because I had already made the choice not to have anymore children with my husband at the time. He wanted me to do it, but all I could think about was that I had cancer and I was too busy trying to save my life for the two kids I already had than worry to about the possibility of the ones that werent even a twinkle in my eye.



A year later, we are divorcing and I'm sure he would have fought for custody of our embryos or my eggs if he could. Also, my period stopped 6 weeks after my first treatment and hasn't returned.



I sometimes wonder about the future and what if I meet someone and he would want kids and I kick myself for not doing the fertility preservation. But then I remind myself that I'm blessed with two kids and the man I choose in the future will take me as I am or not have me at all.



Anyway, hope this helps.

Arale

Hi, egg preservation is only one of the options. You can also choose the ovarian tissue preservation, which is actually really good because you don't need estimulation and therefore don't pose a risk if you are ER/PR+. Also you can ask your doc about zoladex, which acts like freezing your ovaries and minimises the risks of chemo on them.

Anyway there are many stories of young women who were able to have children without any kind of fertility prevention.

shadow2356

I did not do fertility preservation. I was sorry though because I was undergoing IVF at the time of diagnosis. However, I just had a baby with the assistance of a gestational carrier. He was born very early but he is doing great.

There are ways to have children (even your own genetic children) even if it is too risky to carry.

Good luck to everyone!

IFightLikeaWoman

Hello All,

I too am young (33) and was diagnosed with breast cancer recently. I am currently undergoing chemo and did not do any sort of fertility preservation. I really did not have the time to freeze eggs or anything like that because they wanted to begin chemo immedietly even before surgery. I hope that I will be able to have a natural child when all is said and done. If not my husband and I decided that we will adopt.

JadeGirl

Hi all,

I was diagnosed the first time just before my 33rd birthday and like many of you, were just starting to try for a family.  We too investigated all the fertility preservation options but decided to forego given the stress it would put on my body, cancer treatment timelines, financially etc.  I was put on zoladex and after 4 chemo cycles, my periods came back within 3 months.  

At that stage we planned to wait 2 years after treatment to try again but over a year later, my cancer came back.  This time I was given more aggressive and expensive treatment (again on zoladex).  Where I live, you have to pay for herceptin and I was glad we were able to fund this.  It was difficult decision the first time, but in hindsight it was the right one.  Don't get me wrong, I still would love to have a child but as my husband said "I need you here first and we can figure out the rest later".  My periods have come back steadily for 4 months now, and we are starting to adjust back to a "real" life.  

Given my previous experience, I am not sure if I will wait for 2 years before trying naturally for a family (and/or to adopt) but have great hope for the future, as we all should!  

Alexandra123

I did not preserve my eggs 6 years ago when diagnosed. Too much to take on at that time!! Now, we want to conceive. I took 5 years tamoxifen and lupron shots (hormone +). My last shot was in May 2012 and had 2 periods 3 months later. Now no period! Not sure if I'm ovulating. I'm going to make appt with obgyn soon to get her perspective. I'm 38 years old and feel its now or never to conceive. We'll see!!!

flimsical

I realize this may a bit too late for any advice, but I am currently in the process of preserving fertility by egg freezing. I've given myself two shots at night the past couple nights, and I have about 8 more days to go before they do the actual retrieval procedure. After the procedure, I will start chemo probably that same week. I thought I'd be totally freaked out giving myself shots, but it turns out it's not too hard, nor is it painful because it's just subcutaneous.

I don't know if any of you are aware of this program, but I was able to do all of this because of the Livestrong Foundation. They have a financial assistance program called Sharing Hope that, for eligible cancer patients, covers most of the costs associated with fertility preservation. It's still kind of expensive ($4,000), but in my opinion, worth it if ever necessary. And much cheaper than if you were paying out of pocket (since most insurance companies do not cover infertility). If the treatments end up being less than $4,000, you get that money back. If they are more than $4,000, you don't pay anything more. Egg freezing, while not as common as embryo freezing, is no longer considered experimental. Unfortunately there isn't much data on it, especially of women who actually used the eggs. But, I think in the long run I will be happy I did this, even if I am able to have kids naturally after I am done with all of this. It's piece of mind.

http://www.fertilehope.org/financial-assistance/index.cfm

SKD

I had my embryos frozen before starting chemo. After chemo I got my periods back 6 months later. A year and a half later I got pregnant naturally but I miscarried and had to have a D&C. We have been trying for a year again but no luck but hopefully we will be able to naturally! Ill keep you all updated!

runner1987

I am 25. I haven't started chemotherapy yet but my oncologist says that my natural fertility is very likely to return when my treatments are complete. I'm triple positive stage 1, so no rads and only 4 rounds of TCH, no Adriamycin/doxorubicin. I'll only be 30 when I'm finished with Tamoxifen, so that may be why no one seems concerned about the potential loss of my fertility. In any case, I think egg harvesting or embryo freezing would just be too much for me to take on right now.

politicomama

I am young, 33, but we were done having kids when I was diagnosed.  My little guy was 14 months.  I did want to share that my friend was diagnosed stage III ten years ago, and five years post treatment they had a beautiful little girl.  They just recently adopted as well, as they had started that process prior to concieving.  Good thoughts and prayers coming to each of you.  

Poke

I agree with runner1987, I just turned 30 and I felt like it was all just too much on top of everything else. On the bright side, I just finished chemo Friday!!! 

cloudberry

Hello, sorry if this is too late to be of any use, but I opted not to do fertility preservation. I felt it would just be too much to take on, felt uncomfortable about the whole prospect and was concerned both about delaying my treatment and the surges of oestrogen involved (mine was ER+). I was diagnosed aged 30 and my consultant and onc seemed confidant I would keep my fertility despite FEC-T chemo. I am nearly two years into Tamoxifen now which messes with my cycle, but have had periods so am confident about my fertility. I now just have to wrestle with the decision when to come off Tamoxifen to try to concieve...! I wish everyone the best of luck during this challenging time and want you to know that you are not on your own - us youngies may not be statistically represented but we are out there! Good luck x

slg76

hi.  I was 33 when dx and I did not do any fertility preservation because I was pregnant at dx.  I did ACT and one year of tamoxifen.  My periods did not come back after I had my daughter and I did not have a period until 7 months after I stopped tamoxifen.  Although my periods returned I am not ovulating on my own (or perhaps sporadically).  I am currently using oral fertility meds to try and have baby #2.  It can be surprisingly safe to use fertility aid after breast cancer, even if it is hormone pos as mine is.  I have seen many success stories of pregnancies after chemo.  I am happy to share more info about the fertility meds with you if/when you are ready.  Hopefully by the time you finish your treatment I can tell you a happy story about me getting pregnant.  

Take good care of yourself and try to think that the time will come for you to be a mommy.  

Novagirl

I did fertility preservation after my surgery before chemo started. My Onc gave me 8-12 weeks after surgery to do fertility preservation. I was a week or 2 shy of hitting the 12 week deadline. With the stress of being diagnosed and my body recovering from surgery, it took forever for my period to start. I was trying to arrange things for the cold caps at the same time. This was the most stressful time in my life. I am a laid back person but during this time I was close to stroking out on a daily basis. I completely understand not doing it because it is too much to take on. It really was awful. We have 5 embryos frozen. I will hope to have a gestational carrier carry the baby. The cost of this is over $100,000. So now there is a huge dilemma about what to do with the embryos. I just finished chemo a few days ago and I still have radiation next year so I don't have to make any decisions now but I think about it so much. I feel like I have my children frozen. I won't give up hope that we can one day get them here.   

gildedcage

I also took some measures to protect my fertility before starting chemo. I'm 38 and had been trying to conceive at the time of my dx. They told me that without preservation measures I had about a 50-60% chance of going into menopause from the chemo. I completed an IVF egg retrieval and got 7 embryos from it. I'll have to wait until I'm 40-41 to get those implanted. I also was given the Lupron shot during chemo to shut down my ovaries and protect them from chemo. No one could tell me how effective it would be in protecting my fertility but was told that it would improve my chances. I just finished chemo last week so it will be another few months before I get my hormonal levels tested to see if I am still fertile. I did a lot of research before starting IVF and found that if you are in your 20's or early 30's, chances are that you will maintain your fertility after chemo. It may take time and your fertility may be reduced but you likely will not go into complete menopause. For someone in their late 30's or 40's, the chances are more mixed. I'm hoping that I'll be able to conceive naturally in the future but doing IVF gave me an extra measure of security and comfort going into chemo. It was expensive though and I was given a discount on the price because it was a cancer related situation. I used USC Fertility (they specialize in cancer and fertility preservation) and the cost was around $9,000 for egg retrieval. I was told it is typically about $16,000 for people who do not receive the discount. 

Anonymous

I doubt I will be doing fertility preservation. I'm 28 so I've been told that the chances of being able to conceive naturally after treatment are pretty high, the chances of frozen embryos taking pretty low and the chances of my Her2+ very aggressive cancer spreading by delaying a few weeks...well, it's more than I'm comfortable with. My BF agrees with me--he says he'd rather lose our chance at a bio kid than risk me progressing to Stage IV. My onc is consulting with the fertility doctor this week and making his recommendation but I'm pretty sure what way I'm going to go.

andreamia

I was diagnosed at 26 last summer. Everything was just moving so fast that I didn't really feel like I had time to investigate fertility preservation... I had to make a quick decision. I decided that it was too expensive since insurance wouldn't cover it. My doctor told me that I would still have a 90% chance of being able to have children after chemo (four rounds of AC and twelve weekly Taxol). Those seemed like pretty good odds to me. And the one consult I had with the fertility doc told me that IVF would have a 40% success rate... I was really surprised by that. Not terrible numbers, but I thought it would be higher? Didn't seem like it was worth the investment to me at the time. 

However, I am a little regretful that I wasn't able to look into it more. I did not know about the fertile hope program and I believe I would have qualified. I had regular periods through my AC and then in the middle of Taxol they completely stopped and the hot flashes started. I was terrified of entering "chemopause" but my doctor seems very confident that I will come out of it when I am done with my treatments. I sure hope she is right! I definitely want to have children in the future. I only have two more rounds of chemo so I hope my periods won't take too long to return. Then again, I will be on tamoxifen so that might mess up my menstrual cycle too :-/ So much to worry about! Ahh

h0pe

Hello, I'm 31 trying to decide whether or not to freeze embryos before chemo.  I am very nervous because I am ER/PR positive. I know studies do not show any correlation with fertility preservation and BC/recurrence; however, I feel like since most BC survivors do not do fertility preservation, the studies are somewhat limited.  There's such a small cohort of women who are diagnosed in their child bearing years. I want children more than anything, but am so scared it will "still things up." I am BRCA 1 + so this is really my only chance to have biological kids.  Any thoughts would be appreciated.

Srh242

I think the link between ivf and breast cancer is very scary. Please talk to your doctor. 

mom2Bnegativex3

I didn't do it. I didn't think I could get pregnant but here I am! 39 and 20 weeks pregnant!! I wish you luck! BTW I was dx 11/09! 4 AC and then 4 Taxol. Mast. in the middle! Good luck!