Is this depression?

wifessupport

Hi Friends,

My wife was diagnosed recently about 3 months ago with invasive ductal carcinoma.  She is currently undergoing chemo.  12 * taxol + hercepting followed by FEC and hercepting thereafter.  She is currently in 10th taxol cycle.  However, for the past 2 weeks she has lost interest in anything.  It is hard for her to get out.  She stays indoors most of the time and is very reluctant to get out of the house.  The doctor has said everything will be fine and gave a good prognosis.  Still I am not sure what is bothering her.  My kids are 7 and 4 and I feel they are getting emotionally disturbed in this.  This is not like her, when it was diagnosed she was upbeat and taking everything positively. Now there is a 180 degree turn around.

Anybody experience this kind of behaviour?  ANy ideas are appreciated.

Thanks

HLB

I got sort of depressed on chemo. I think it messes with your chemicals. I asked the dr if chemo causes depression and he said well, you havE cancer, your breasts are off etc, anyone would be depressed. But that wasn't it. I was upbeat and positive too but I think the chemo was doing it. I dropped it because he clearly didn't get what I was saying and it did get better. That's a lot of chemo to get too. Hopefully it will get better when she's done with it.

Moderators

wifesupport, there is good information about Depression as it relates to breast cancer treatment at the main Breastcancer.org site. The article covers some of the causes - including some chemotherapies and hormonal therapies, as well as early menopause brought on by treatments.

There is also information about treatments, and strategies for managing depression.

• The Mods

fredntan

yep, btdt.....

chemo is very depressing. you have to make her take a walk. doesn't matter if its down to mailbox and back. have her put on some good music. you have to tell her she can do this. don't let her lay around depressed. best thing I did during chemo was get on some antidepression meds, it really helped.

when she cries, just tell her you love her and that she can do this, but you have to be firm also. don't let her lie around and feel sorry for herself. She has to find activities to do to fill her day. I still don't know how I filled my days.

Hugs

1Athena1

hello, wifessupport,

I am sorry that your wife is going through this.

We cannot give you medical opinions on this site - only a doctor can. Some people may experience depression during treatment and those symptoms may subside once treatment is over. She could also be suffering from extreme fatigue, which chemo is known to cause. It may be hard to separate the cancer from the treatment from the feelings that go with it.

I suggest that you bring your wife's situation to her doctor's attention. If it is affecting your children (which is only natural and would happen in most any family of a mother undergoing treatment) then it may be a good idea to discuss those concerns with the pediatrician to see what he/she recommends.

Best of luck to all of you. And remember that this is a process you are all feeling your way through. There are no one-size-fits-all answers.

wifessupport

Friends,

Thanks for the response. After this post  got my wife checked by a psychiatric and he suggested Cymbalta 60mg and Ativan on a as needed basis.   Just wondering, does anyone know how long before she starts feeling significantly better. 

Cowgirl13

The time for the medication varies by individual.  It can take from 2 to 6 weeks.

May I make a suggestion to you (and I have been on meds for depression)?  Hard as it is, try not to worry about when the meds kick in--they will--but your worry about when the meds will kick in will be another stressor on her and she does not need stress.  In my own experience, stress feeds depression.  She may just need time to rest and you may have to step up to the plate with the kids.  The hardest time for me was waiting for the antidepressant to kick in.  It was almost worst than the depression but my meds did kick in.

As one who has been there, I promise it will get better.

You and your family are in my prayers.

Lizzie

wrsmith2x

Wifessuport, 

The only time I cried was during chemo.  I was very upbeat the entire time but something about that chemo really messes with a person.  My husband kept telling me thru the whole thing, "In a year this will be a distant memory."  And he was right!  

Be patient with her.  Love her, let her cry, etc.  But keep telling her, "This too shall pass."

I pray she will be better, in all ways, very soon.  Namaste'.

wifessupport

Thanks wrsmith2x, I have been trying boost her courage up as much as I can.



Thanks again.

Moonflower83

I also got depressed during chemo. I believe it´s the medication and also the fact, that you start feeling sick because of chemo. The cancer thing get´s to your mind. For me it was the first time I realised that I really have cancer and that it is definitely not a bad dream.

It´s a hard time. Just be patient.

cfdr

When I was on chemo, I was not depressed but I was extremely fatigued. I really didn't feel like going out and doing anything. Sometimes it was an effort just to get up and walk around the block. Also, because of the lowered immunity, I didn't want to go out anyplace with crowds, such as stores, movies, parties (I was also in chemo this time of year, when we got a LOT of party invitations). And if your wife has lost her hair, she may be feeling a bit embarrassed by that as well. If she is having digestive issues, she may not want to eat rich food at restaurants or parties...and she may not want to be far from a familiar bathroom.

I also found that going out did not take my mind off cancer, because friends always looked at me with these sad puppy eyes to ask how I was doing, or to tell me I looked great when I was bald and felt awful. Strangers would stare at my turban. It wasn't a comfort, it just made me feel more like an invalid.

I guess what I'm saying is, don't assume it's depression, as there are many other symptoms that could be causing her to want to stay home. ESPECIALLY fatigue. Realize that she may be feeling at least mildly ill all the time, and being home is simply more comfortable than going out.