Awakening

lightandwind

When diagnosed with cancer, it suprisingly did not come as a shock, even made sense. How could this be? My spirit was crying, my body out of balance, and I turned away. I turned away to work hard, give to others and ignored myself, until I couldn't work hard anymore, couldn't give anymore. Something was wrong. I found out that what was wrong is I had cancer. Though it's only been five months so far on this journey which some are called to take, I am feeling almost grateful for this experience. Not the affliction of course, but what it has and is teaching me. Last night I dreamt of a baby. It turned into a cicada and back into a baby. this dream has stayed with me all day. Unusual. I didn't even think I knew what a cicada was, until I woke up this morning. I decided to look up the symbolism of a cicada. To the chinese, it means rebirth. Exactly. Exactly. The world I see is so different now. My body feels so differnt now. It is like a rebirth.. though it may end in death. How could my unconscious bring this message to me so clearly? a baby? a cicada? a dream I can't forget? Something greater than me is at work here. whatever happens..I am alive..and..I believe.