ranting - pinktober, unfairness, mindset

PiscesMoon

this is the time of year that the bc monkey is on my back banging on my head with a hammer.  3 years ago this month i had my very first mammo in my life and bingo there was bc.  pinktober drives me nuts.  in addition, a friend of mine who was dx'd with the same type/grade cancer as i was, had no lymph/vascular involvement, did the same TCH cocktail, took the hormonal treatment (i did not), and had a complete hsyto, still had this bas**** come back to her liver.  now she's medically retired, fighting for her life, and i'm NED (as far as i know).

this is insane.  this whole disease is insane.  the whole pink movement is insane.  HER2+++ is insane.  i guess at the moment i'm insane, too.  screaming in my mind how this is just not fair.  my mindset right now is not if it will come back but 'when'.  this is the month when i'm checking on my personal time at work and planning for the next time i have to go through surgery/treatment.

i really wish i could just sleep through this month and wake up in november.  but then that's when my yearly mammo is due and, of course, in december my 6 month follow up with the onc.

i guess this is a pointless post but i appreciate anyone who took the time to read it.

~M

jackboo09

Hi PiscesMoon

I feel exactly the same. All that Pinktober crap. I cant even pick up a tin of beans without it having a pink label. Too many companies jumping on the bandwagon purely for their own profits when the money isnt actually getting to where it is needed.

Your friend: That must be devastating for you. This disease just sucks. How can 2 people with such a similar dx fare differently? So awful. Don't know what else to say...

Its very hard to stay positive when that happens to someone close. Hugs to you and your friend.

Liz

markat

(((Hugs)))



I'm so sorry about your friend.