Scared out of my mind

Charliestweetie

I am totally scared. Got the call from my BS. All of my 24 lymph nodes were involved. I had six tumors total in my breast- (one was an inch big)--none of them was picked up by MRI or Mammo. Stage 3---need pet scan now and chemo and rads and hormonal. I am soooooo damn scared now!!!!

cyano

So sorry to hear your scary news. It's one step at a time. Chemo isn't fun, but it is doable and you have a great community here to support you.

Cindi74

Charliesweet,  Do you have a significant other, spouse, friend, neighbor, work or church group for support?  You are going to need emotional and physical support to get through this.  When I called the America Cancer Society to find out where I could get a wig, they asked if I would like to talk with a survivor for emotional support.  When I called ACS to schedule a "look good, feel better" class, they asked if I needed a ride.  Now is the time to reach out.

I am retired and spend much of my time on a computer.  This website has been a god send--first for information that has been cleared through experts--those pages before you get to the boards and chat rooms.  My Surgeon explained my pathology using a Breastcancer.org phamplet. 

But more important is what I have learned from the brave, smart, knowledgeable women who write the discussion boards.  Those sisters, who, like me start Chemo in September are like a support network.  Those who started in August, July and even last year left a path of knowledge so very helpful.  None of us wanted into this club, but now that we are here, we are on a team to get us all through.  Hugs, hugs, hugs.  C.

Alicethecat

Hi Charlie

Diagnosis is always the worst part, in my humble opinion.

Once you find out more about it and have a treatment plan in place, you'feel better, promise.

These are the kind words that someone wrote to me when I was diagnosed and it turned out that way for me.

There are so many things the doctors can do to help us these days. Treatment really has come on.

Best wishes

Alice

etherize

{{{Charliestweetie}}}, so sorry you have joined us.  We all know how scary it is to get that damned call. 

You'll probably hear this advice a lot:  

First, breathe.  In through the mouth, out through the nose.   It's crazy, but the stress is intense (as you know) and it's so easy to forget to just breeeeeeaaaaathe .....

Write down your questions, and bring somebody with you to doctor appts.   You're going to be flooded with information and it's very hard to absorb it all.

YOU are in charge of who you tell, and when.   This is a time to care for yourself first, and then worry about others. 

Don't let yourself be rushed into any decisions.  Sometimes doctors have a way of making us feel pressured to choose a course of action immediately.  You will need time to process everything that's going on.

Of course, this site is a wealth of information.  But it's also good to take a break from it, to let yourself absorb what's going on.

I found chemo, rads and now the hormonal therapy all to be much easier than I expected.  Your health care team will work hard to make you comfortable.  If they don't, fire them! :-) 

FilterLady

Hi Charlie:

Like the ladies above have said, waiting for a complete diagnosis is so hard.  Getting scans, etc is scary.  I was scared too thinking the worst but then I realized that being scared was not going to change the outcome and that I needed to get all the facts so that I could make a decision on the first step that I need to take and when.

Don't be rushed into anything, you will need time to make a decision based on facts not on "what if".  Your medical team has handled patients that have been scared so they know and are well equipped to help you all they can.  I was in tears through several tests and it was so comforting to have the medical team be real "people" and realize that they had the power to make me more comfortable.

I didn't have to have chemo but I found that my lumpectomy and SNB then rads were easier than I thought it would be.  I'm down to just checkups now and taking letrozole for the next 5 years.

I'm a little antsy about my first post diagnosis mammo on Thursday, but I know that I can't get to the 2nd mammo till I get the first one done, etc.  You have to take one step at a time.

There is a wealth of info on the boards from what questions to ask to how well we recover from our various surgeries, deal with friends, etc.  Please read, read, read and have a list of questions to ask your medical team, then you will feel more "in control" of what's happening.

Please come back and let us know how your tests come out, we care about you.

God bless you,

LaDonna

TectonicShift

Same thing happened to me. I was supposed to be stage 2 with no nodes and turned out to be stage 3C with tons of nodes not picked up on MRI or Ultrasound. I cried nearly every day for about six months. But now I'm about nine months out and feeling great. Chemo is hard, I won't lie. But it is totally doable! Read the thread started by Many called Long Term Survival with Positive Nodes. You will see that many women do fine. My oncs have told me I have a better than 50% chance of being cured, even with all my positive nodes. And my nodes were busting open with cancer. I can't promise you everything will be okay. But you gotta believe it will be!

Here are just some ideas:

Do chemo. Consider fasting during chemo. (Google it.)

Do radiation.

Do hormonal drugs.

Take baby aspirin.

Take metformin.

Take simvastatin.

Eat lots of broccoli and cauliflower.

Exercise every day.

Drink green tea. 

Start reading about clinical trials at clinicaltrials.gov. If there is a clinical trial you are interested in, contact the nearest trial site to you and make an appointment. If you're onc doesn't offer it, it doesn't matter. You can join a trial at a different hospital.

Where are you located? 

You can do this!

TS 

Charliestweetie

Thanks girls!!!

TS, I live in the greater Philly area. I will do chemo, rads and the hormonal drugs as well. I will ak about the metformin. I know that a relative in Canada is also dealing with Stage 3 and her oncologist believes in combining the traditional medicine with natural one. So she is on Melatonin, Green Tea Extract, no sugar, no flour and no alcohol, too.

I have a great support system here: my friends are very encouraging and offer us any help possible, but still it is my body that I don't feel safe in and that scares the living hell out of me! Poor husband and kids are affected, too.

Needless to say I didn't sleep all night. I am so nervous. Don't know what I could take, if I have to ask for an anti-anxiety prescription or not.

Hugs

Charliestweetie 

jacee

Charlie...sending you a big hug! Yes, ask for some Xanax or Ativan to help you through these uncertain days! It is very overwhelming. Write down all your questions before you see each Dr. Ask for copies of all reports, pathology, lab. I always ask for disk of all pet, ct or MRI scans plus the written report. Take someone with you if you can...you won't be able to remember it all!

You are going to find out that you are stronger than you ever realized! You can do this, and we will all be here to help whenever you need us.

(((((Charlie)))))