just when I thought I had fear at bay

odie16

Coming up on one year cancer free and have been working hard to not let fear of recurrence bother me... Had myself down to a few hundred times a day until now. My close friend who just recently passed the 5 year mark has either a new primary or recurrence.  Still testing to determine which.... UGH!!!!! 

BikerLee

i'm so sorry for your friend - that is tough news to hear.

i have a thought regarding the fear of recurrence... 

take a look at this thread:

In topic Are you afraid to be happy?

In forum: Moving Beyond Cancer

i did the emotional freedom technique, and ... wow...  i did it last wdnesday, and the difference is ... delightfully surprising!

best wishes,

lee

calamtykel

I will tell you what my oncologlist told me, when I freaked about seeing so many people in the waiting room who were obviously dying - I asked her why I was even doing chemo if I'd just end up like them.  She said "It is important to remember that THEY are not YOU.  Every cancer is individual and different."

We all know the possibility is there - 5, 10 or even 15 years later to have a distant recurrence or new primary.   As horrible as this is, your friend is not YOU.  I think it will be healing for you to be there for her at this time.  yesterday I visited a friend who just had a kidney removed due to kidney cancer; and will be having a lung biopsy today to see if she has mets.  I found her faith inspiring and her peaceful attitude rubbed off on me, as I'm waiting for results from suspicious bloodwork.   Hang in there!  

odie16

Thanks for the replies.

Calamtykel, you are absolutely right. Thanks so much for sharing that as I needed it. Sending prayers for your friend as well. 

LRM216

If it's any consolation to you, I'm triple neg, 3 1/2 yrs. out, and still fearful every day.  Hard not to keep looking over my shoulder, no matter how long I am out.  I am most grateful for the years I have had, but don't ever think I will feel, at any point in time, "safe."  So sorry to hear about your friend, and I wish her nothing but the best and an easy journey fighting this beast once again.