May 2012 radiation

AEM47

Goodie - I drank very little during chemo..but, I've got to say..I drink probably 2xs a week now...sometimes more, sometimes less.  I have a job where people are very social after work and being on a military installation, there is a bar open and ready at any time :-)

Betty Ford sometimes reserves a bed for me on weekends...heheee - just kidding.

In all seriousness, my Onc didn't seem too concerned, but I make sure I'm hydrated before and after drinking and try not to over do it.  I have a hard time thinking that it caused my BC, but I do try to keep it down.  Considering I was excercising, eating right and at normal body weight before BC, It's the one thing i do enjoy and I don't think it could have erased all the positive things I do to keep myself healthy.

I figure I'm willing to give up the estrogen..giving up my wine is just not something I'm willing to do right now :-)

Neeners815

Goodie - we've been talking about drinking a bit in the June thread.  I'm not giving it totally up, but I am cutting down a bit.

jittersmom

the report was in our local paper right after i got diagnosed with BC about wine and BC...None of my oncologist or RO's have said anything about giving it up..and I plan on drinking wine!lol.I went to a cooking demo called Taste and Savor by a BC survivor and she pair wines with food...her oncologist thinks wine is ok so that works for me!

Cheers everyone have a good weekend

mckenna

i was not a big drinker before cancer and probably have been drinking more since bc but by drinking more i mean a 1 drink a week rather than 1-3 drinks a month   i think like everthing else moderation is fine.  my big thing is diet and exercise, i need to be better about both. 

AND THEN THERE WAS 1!!!!!!!

mckenna

who  is doing the walk this weekend?  BL? Goodie? Neeners?  i can't remember but good luck and report back.  i am still a little nervous participating in a walk as a "survivor"

oh and my drinking is going to be bad this weekend, a friend just called and we are now having dinner and a bottle of wine while the kids ride bikes in the lot across from my house so drinking 3 of 4 days is way more than i typically do what was that i said about moderation?

Neeners815

I'm doing the walk tomorrow night.  It starts at 7 PM and goes until 7 AM.  We're bringing cots and a hammock for rest during breaks.  It should be interesting - it will be my first time walking.  I signed up for this BEFORE BC... and now I'm a 'survivor'.  Talk about freaky.  A few of the people going don't even know that I've had BC or are in any treatment; they'll find out when they see my purple shirt, I guess!

sbelizabeth

So...I have been asked to join several groups as they do a "strides against bc" event, and also the big Avon walk in September, but I just don't know.  With my emotions so close to the surface these days, I think it would be very difficult to see all those people with "in memory of" placards. 

Also, it feels a little weird to think about being in a party-type atmosphere and sort of celebrating breast cancer.  I know, I know...we're celebrating raising money for "the cure," whenever that might be, but women dancing in wild pink costumes just feels so NOT what I feel when I think about my breast cancer treatment.

Breast cancer isn't a joyful pink sorority.  It's what keeps me awake at night because I'm scared, and is responsible for this ugly surgical scar where my soft breast used to be.  But I don't want to be the pink ribbon grinch--help me with this!

mckenna

neeners, good luck and use that purple shirt to get the best sleeping spot

sb, i feel the same way.  i was anti pink before i got cancer and the now that i have bc, my feelings have not changed.  we don't have an avon walk in our area because i think i would rather do that than koman i just think avon uses it's funds more wisely.  i am doing koman next weekend mainly because it is important to my family.

i think you should take a pass this year, see if you still feel the same next year and if you do, pass again   if we have earned something through all of this it is to do what feels right to us and if it does not feel right don't do it. 

i told everyone i did not want one pink ribbon gift when i was diag.  i did get a pink ribbon wine glass which i plan to take to the winery on monday and then it is going in a box and put away.  i don't know what the answer is but the over the top celebrating in pink gets to me.  i have one pink shirt and i have stopped wearing it because i feel like it tells everyone i have bc.  even though i wore it long before i had bc

sbelizabeth

It's hump day, my sisters!

Today is treatment #18, which means I'm finally over the hump.  More than halfway finished. 

My skin is pink and looks like I foolishly laid out in the sun with baby oil on it, like I did when I was a teenager, but no blistering, just soreness.

Mckenna, I love the smiley faces with sunglasses when we finish our rads.  Can't wait for mine to be there!  Happy Friday, everyone!

Neeners815

I don't know what to expect from the walk.  This walk isn't just for BC, it's for all cancers and sponsered by the American Cancer Society.  My very close friend had thyroid cancer two years ago, and she is a survivor and our team leader.

mckenna

yeah for hump day!!!  i can't wait till we all have the smiley face with sunglasses next to our names!

i just got end of radiation flowers sent to my office.  since i won't be at work on monday, my aunt sent them today.  they are beautiful and smell great.  i love gerber daisies.

Jan24

I love gerber daisies too!  I love all the posts in this forum especially the orchid.  Yes, they drew on me lots.  I had boring elevator music during my treatments, no fun songs to make me laugh.  Beachbum congrats!!  AEM47  I got a kick out of your Betty Ford comment, I drove by the real Betty Ford center In Rancho Mirage every day on my way to radiation  hee hee. Mckenna almost done, are you eventually going to start a new forum for us or do we just continue on here?  I like the sun after our names  As a heads up, I have been so tired these last few days since completing radiation.  I saw my oncologist yesterday and she says it is normal for fatigue to peak now.  

Lagata1276

On the topic of drinking causing BC, I totally disagree. I love my drinks and used to be a party animal. As I got older, I would enjoy all sorts of mixed drinks and some wine now and then. I would say I would drink at least one drink a night for the last several years with an occasional break for several months if I was doing a weight loss competition, or had surgery for one reason or another. I have three maternal aunts who rarely drank who have had BC, around the same age as me, I am 45, and I still tested negative for the BRCA genes. But seriously? I have been physically active my whole life and rarely eat fried food or sweets. The docs have not said anything about my drinking history.



The only reason I stopped drinking every night now is to lose a few pounds before Tamoxifen. I'm going out with the girls tonight and have been saving my calories and will work out extra long this weekend. Long Island iced teas baby!!



Mckenna - you may even outdo me this weekend. Just dont drink and drive!

silviazara

McKenna - I love the winery celebration idea. 1 to go!

I also don't like the pink ribbons or pink everything other than baby newborn clothes.

I gave up drinking to almost ZERO after being diagnosed 1st time. Every time I would have a glass of wine I would feel incredibly guilty. Not anymore. Now I enjoy wine, beer and occasional margarita. No way I am going to give in to this cancer phantom anymore ..  let's enjoy our life and being alive!  

Goodie

Thanks for all the responses.  AEM - I drank very little during chemo too.  Nothing tasted good and wine doesn't taste good yet either.    Before bc I would like to enjoy a glass or two of wine before dinner especially on the weekends and in the summer my DH and I liked to enjoy our time on the deck in the evenings with a glass of wine and conversation.  I too think everything in moderation.  Now I find myself enjoying a glass of grape juice fortified with calcium.  Even my MO said you are very healthy other than getting bc when I was diagnosed.  Yup go figure. 

Neeners - I saw you mention about the discussion on the June rads.  I need to get back on track with that one too.  Good luck this weekend!  Have fun and it's even better walking weather than last weekend too when I had you walking.  LOL

sbelizabeth - I'm with you about the pink and all these walks.  I think you should pass this year too.  I'm with mckenna that I'm not all into that pink and companies putting it on their items to sell.  I was diagnosed late September and pink October was a bit overwhelming.

I was going to go to the beach with Reiley (my golden) for today and tomorrow but I decided to stay home with my family.  I was just too tired after my treatment this morning and as much as I LOVE the beach it can be a bit lonely.  DD has work tonight, DS has rehearsal tomorrow and DH's family is having a family dinner tomorrow night.  I would like to miss the family dinner but I think I may debut my topless look for them.  LOL  I don't plan on going topless full time until I my last day of rads.  So, I'm hanging here at home and I will probably do my summer clothing switch in my closet that I haven't done yet!  Yes, my room is a mess!  LOL and I don't really care.  I'm still sleeping on my relciner in the family room anyway. 

My techs just remarked two of my spots today and put on some new tape.  I asked if they used the one obnoxious mark in the center of my chest that you can see in whatever I wear.  Amy said she would ask them on Monday if they can lower it.  I hope they say yes.  It's one that use a lot though. 

BL - I'm not going to miss my techs either.  Now my oncology infusion nurses I do miss.  They are wonderful and I did spend a lot more time with them over 4 months. 

Hope everyone has a fantastic weekend.  And I think I'm going to enjoy a drink on my deck with my DH tonight and enjoy being alive!  Thanks! 

sbelizabeth

Umm, Goodie...when you say "topless," you're referring to a hat or wig, right?  And when you're "just hanging around at home," you're sitting around the house in a casual manner, not, well...letting the girls just hang, right? 

I'm pretty open with stuff like this, but going topless at my DH's family dinner would be right out.  I was even a little shy about breastfeeding in front of my mother-in-law.

mckenna

sb. i was wondering the same thing

 lagata, enjoy your night out with the girls.

jan, we have to atleast stay here until the last one of us finishes but i think we should just hang around after too.  who is going to start tamoxifin soon, i am sure we will have some stories about that.  i start 7/1.

silvia, that is great advice!  i am going to enjoy living. i have a question for you.  how closely were you followed after your first diagnosis?  i keep seeing all these recurrances that are stage 1 or 2 or even 3. it seems like no one has a recurrance or secondary bc of stage 0 if you are being scanned every 6 months how is there a new diagnosis past stage 0 wouldn't it be caught by mri or mammo?  that is what i am banking on but obviously i am very mistaken.  with every new phase of this treatment i feel more and more uninformed.

silviazara

McKenna - stage 0 is only for DICS, I had IDC.

I had yearly MRI. No mammo, since I had double mastectomy. The trouble with these scans is, they won't find anything smaller than few millimeters anyway. I found a new tumor myself, it was only like 5 mm. Right under the skin, almost in my armpit.

I also had blood tests every 3 months, but there is no blood test that would really find breast cancer until its already metastasized.

mckenna

thanks for explaining that to me. i did not realize you had a double mastectomy. good for you for being on top of things.  my original cancer was dcis and found on a "routine" MRI due to ADH.  i never had a lump that was able to be felt or seen on mammo or ultrasound.  if i had cancer again it would be a secondary cancer not a recurrance (at least that is what i think was explained to me).  so i just keep wondering how a secondary cancer can be diagnosed past stage 0 if you are getting screened so frequently. 

Neeners815

mckenna - mine was DCIS, too, but Grade 3.  No lump for me, either.

Well, it looks like I'm going to be the caboose on this Rads train!  I love the smilies, too.  Today I am 30% done. I'm sure I already mentioned that somewhere or another, but I have to remind myself that I have a nice little chunk done now.   My mom and dad sent me this cute little cupcake arrangement of flowers to celebrate 30%.  Totally unexpected.  My mom has been wonderful about checking in and sending encouraging notes, email, presents.  It's definitely brought us closer (we live far apart and rarely see each other).  So there is a little silver lining there.

silviazara

well, if you got a secondary cancer and it was IDC (meaning that it started in milk duct but spread behind it)... your secondary cancer would be automatically stage 1. It can spread when it is only super microscopic and doesn't have to be caught by any scan as DCIS. IDC tumor can be much smaller than DCIS tumor, but has some cancer cells leaving it. They can get to lymph nodes and only then be found by scans.. there you go, and you are diagnosed as stage 2. I don't know how else to explain it.. I hope it helps ;-)

Dizzy215

As I understand it, if you've had dcis, there can be a recurrence of that or idc. Same the other way around.

I could feel my lump but it was not detected on the previous years mammo or ultrasound and not even on the mammo that I had just before I was diagnosed! As it was 4cm at the time of surgery, it had probably been growing for a couple of years. It does call into question the usefulness of mammograms, particularly if you have dense breast tissue. I am going to skip mammos and have regular ultrasound scans and I'm going to give 3D mammography a try.

mckenna

silvia, that does make sense, i was thinking things happening in a more sequential process like, dcis for a while which turned into idc stage one which went to lymph nodes, etc, etc, so i just kept thinking why wouldn't the dcis be caught before it got to idc.  i think since my spot was so small, i was just thinking if it hadn't been found it would have moved out of the duct when it got bigger, never dawned on me that it could be a small spot and leave the duct.  see how much i dont' know.  my first bs was very bad at communicating and i was so overwhelmed i let him rush me and bully me into do what he thought was right for me not what i thought was right for me. 

neeners that was very sweet of your mom to send a 30% done cookie!!

silviazara

well, if you got a secondary cancer and it was IDC (meaning that it started in milk duct but spread behind it)... your secondary cancer would be automatically stage 1. It can spread when it is only microscopic and doesn't have to be caught by any scan as DCIS. Maybe IDC tumor can be smaller than DCIS tumor, but has some cancer cells leaving it. They can get to lymph nodes and only then be found by scans.. there you go, and you are diagnosed as stage 2.

MRI didn't find my second tumor. It grew little bigger in few months I guess. I had MRI in February and I felt it with  fingers in September. I really don't know how to find a second cancer when it is still stage 0 .. to have MRI every 3 months? Would that even help? What if it would be so small that is still not really visible by MRI but spreading already? I guess that's how you get stage 1 and above with regular screening.

Sorry - I wanted to edit the previous comment and I deleted it instead.

Goodie

Yes, topless for my wig.  We'll see about tomorrow.  It will make it more real for his family.  I don't want to mess with DH's mom though.  She has dementia.  She does notice that I changed my hair style.  I guess I could just tell her I really cut my hair for the summer.  We'll see.  We didn't tell her about my bc.   

No, I don't go around letting the girls out.  My teenagers would have a fit!  It's been a nice relaxing day with my family.  I probably won't get to those clothes until tomorrow.  Oh well. 

DH & I are going to go out downtown to get some clams casino after we drop DS off for a dinner and movie with his friends.  We used to go out for date night on Wednesdays downtown and get clams casino and crab dip before bc.  I finally have my taste back!

Silvia - did you have chemo and rads the first time?  That's so good you found the lump so small!

Neeners - we will stay with you until you are done too!  Plus I'm going to get back to the June thread too!

mckenna - I love the smiley faces too!  I'm starting tamoxifen on Monday.  We should start our own tamoxifen thread!  My MO said I could start because he already thinks I'm a worry wart with "it" coming back.  I just picked up the prescription but I want to start on a Monday.  I guess it's one of the things I can control and choose for once. 

BLinthedesert

Happy Friday ladies!  

Happy next-to-the-last-day mckenna!

I will not give up my wine completely, but I had already cut back the amount I was drinking because I was training for a race before all this happened ... then after surgery and now I just don't feel like drinking as much.  But, every once-and-a-while, my husband will pull out a bottle we have been "saving" and I will indulge.  And, next week, I will live vicariously through you mckenna! 

This is the problem with DCIS, not all DCIS will invade outside of the duct, but they don't have a good way to determine which will and which won't.  It is not size alone - but grade does have some impact, as grade 3 on biopsy are much more likely to have micro-invasion after lumpectomy/bmx/umx.  So far, none of the "metrics" (van nuys progonistic index, oncotype, etc) have been validated outside of the small groups of woman that they were originately created -- so until then, there are just the options that we all have been given and we (and the doctors) just seem to guess as best we can which option is best.  By the way, the same is true for IDC and which chemo/treatment you receieve, there is simply no completely fool-proof way of telling who will recure.  Sylvia, I am just thankful that yours was a local recurrence - and that you were so diligent in finding it.

My DCIS was found in a lump (by me) - that ended up being mostly "florid proliferation" (ADH and other benign stuff), the lump was big (a little over 5 cm), but the DCIS was a small part of it (1 cm).  I would guess that now anything that may show up will be caught as very small (since every 6 months is a pretty short time period).

silviazara

Goodie - no I didn't have chemo or rads. Oncotype came back very low. Btw, there cannot be any second time with rads. Only if the cancer was on the other side I suppose.

I started Arimidex, I don't have any story so far. Anybody else on Arimidex? I took Tamoxifen for 2 years but apparently it didn't work.. or at least didn't work 100%.

I am so sick of those head covers I am just walking around with baldy head. I guess I don't care anymore.

BLinthedesert

I am sure they are annoying, silvia -- but you (luckily) have a good face for them ;-)

mckenna

You ladies are the best. I was so focused on getting on with treatment I did not learn as much as I should. Now I am researching more with this weird mutation.



I can imagine especially in the summer that wigs and other head wear would be annoying.



Goodie I wanted to start at the beg. Of a month and then I will end on my sister's 41st birthday but whose counting



Thanks again for your wealth of information. Enjoy your two day break

schatzi14

silvia..I am on Arimidex...into the 4th month now. I went on it almost right after chemo and before rads. I was doing really well with no SEs till yesterday and both my hips and calves started to ache. I was walking more than I usually do yesterday so I attribute the aches to that. Today was not bad but I also stood and ironed for 2 hours off and on.

My MO said if I have SEs that really affect my QOL, we will discuss options. My ER+ is only 1.5%...I am not even sure I need to take it but he insists. Will see him in October and see then how it has been going.

There is a thread for Arimidex gals you might be interested in checking out.