my pre-BMX bras

IndigoMont11

I had my surgery on 3/21/2012. Just about two weeks before my diagnosis, I bought two new bras. One I've worn only twice. Because I'm awaiting recon after all followup treatment, I'll be getting prosthetics in a week or so, and I don't see myself wearing any of my Body by Victoria bras again. I doubt they'll work with prosthetics, they are 34DD size (I will be "downsizing") and they all have underwires.



Anyway, I'm stuck on what to do with them. I am going to look for the receipt (I know, you'd think I would have done that already), and hope the store will at least exchange for credit, but if I didn't keep it, I hate to just throw them away. But it's kind of gross to pass down bras..... even to charity(?).



I didn't have an extremely hard time losing my breasts. The BMX was my choice; even though the one side was in fact healthy based on the path report, I no longer wanted to wait for the other shoe to drop.



But ... I think those bras are the last link to the pre-BC me. One of them, in fact, is the one I wore to the hospital the day of my surgery. Just need to move on, right?

River_Rat

IndigoMont11, I gave my bras that were in good shape to a women's shelter.  They were happy to get them.  If you can't get the store to give you a credit you might look for a shelter in your area.

IndigoMont11

There is a women's shelter that I know of somewhere off my commute - the women who stay there use my bus route all the time.  The thought did cross my mind - I'll just have to figure out exactly where it is.  But if they'd be glad to get them, then, I'll do it.

Thanks, River_Rat!

Erica3681

You said you're planning on getting reconstruction after your treatment is over. Why not save them until then? Perhaps they'll fit you once again!

IndigoMont11

Welll.... I'm not planning to wear a DD cup again, or I'd do that.  My upper body is really too small for boobs that size, (seems really obvious now without them!) and while I haven't had my PS consult yet, my plan is to stay in the B-C range.  Also, I just need the space in my underwear drawer - once I felt up to it after my surgery, I dropped into Victoria's Secret and bought a bunch of their Lacie panties in all different colors - the kind that would probably have mortified my teenage daughter if I had one - lol. 

To be totally honest, I'm kind of enjoying being flat for the time being - but it does limit the clothes I can wear - including most of my work clothes - so I'm still getting the prostethetics for dealing with the general public.

fredntan

My dd sold a lot well all of my old VS bras on ebay. Turns out i had a lot.

IndigoMont11

Hmmm... never thought of that!!  Another good idea, thanks!  I do have several but had thought I could toss out the older ones - it was the brand new ones I was dying over a little.

BikerLee

The women's shelter idea is a really really good one.  And... if you choose to stay flat... how about donating some of those clothes that don't fit you anymore as well! 

I'm like you - I LOVE being flat - enjoying it greatly....  I especially like how I feel when I'm just laying on my side reading a book...  Or when I just reach out to pick something up off the table... Or when I'm ... oh heck - I just really like being flat!  

beacon800

I would consider holding onto them til you are totally sure you won't need them. 

Here's why:  I have BMX, no recon and have pretty much tried on every bra under the sun in my adventures with breast forms.  I never used VS bras pre surgery but always liked their look.  I just tried on the Body by Victoria series and didn't mind them much at all.  They are totally a different size from any bra I have ever used.  In everything else I am 36B.  In Body by Victoria I am best in a 34D.  Yes, a D!!  This is from a girl who was an A cup prior to surgery and uses B sized breast forms. 

So I think VS cheats a bit on the size to make the customers feel good.  This means, even if you go smaller, you might be able to use these bras more than you think.  A lot of women find that post recon, they are a larger cup size than what they thought, mostly due to the shape of the reconstructed breast being a bit different and needing a bigger cup.

Unless they are emotional baggage to you, I would hold them and see again later.  If still no good, you can donate and, if you can believe it, I have even seen used VS bras sell on ebay.  And people buy them!

caaclark

If they are brand new I would try to return them or give them away.  Any other ones I would just toss.  I held onto my bras for a year or two and I have to say, it was sort of freeing to dump them.  I also threw away the shirt I was wearing when diagnosed.  I just wanted to get rid of them-every time I looked at them I felt bad.

SpecialK

I was surprised that some of my old bras still fit me after recon, but are on the small side, I was a large B/small C prior to BMX.  You will find that you may need the larger bras while doing fills because your filled TEs will be larger than your finished implants - they have more forward projection than most implants.  Also - I look like a C, but need a D cup bra because of the shape of the implant, I need the larger underwire to go up and around the sides under the arm.  During fills I used old bras after I made a small slit in the fabric that covers the wire, and then just removed the wire itself.  Also, the Red Cross collects clean used clothing to distribute to folks in the community who have lost homes to fire, etc., I am sure they would be happy to have them, the shelter is a good idea too.

IndigoMont11

Well, I hunted and did not find the receipt. Cleaned out my drawer, tossed the old ones that needed to be tossed anyway and kept the two I bought on 2/18. Receipts I had for other stuff said I should be able to at least get store credit for the price paid at the time of purchase without a receipt and did not say the tags had to be on the garments. I called the store to explain what happened and see if they would work with me. Without seeing me in the flesh, I'm not sure they believed my story, but they said to bring them in and they'd see what they could do.



I'm probably going tonight; should be interesting!



I really, really appreciate all the advice. So VS does vanity sizing in reverse, then? And here I thought it was the 20 pounds I'd gained over the past five years! And if they won't take them back, maybe I'll hang onto them at least until I get my prosthetics.

otter

I didn't believe it until I saw it, but our local GoodWill store sells donated underwear.  Yes, it's gross, but true:  people actually buy that stuff.  My sister claimed the same is true at yard sales:  people sell new/unworn or gently-used underwear, and people buy it.

Good grief.

Anyway, given those observations, I wouldn't hesitate to bundle my never-worn bras together with all those T-shirts and slacks in my next GoodWill donation.  Undies?  Nope, not even new.  I'm just not past the grossness of someone wearing someone else's undies.  But, a new bra, especially if (like mine) it still carries the price tag or store tag?  Why not?  (I always figure if GoodWill doesn't want it, it can go in that huge dumpster they have out back.)  And, the women's shelter idea is even better.

otter