Can't stop worrying - need a cuddle!

jgbartlett

Hi guys,

I finished treatment (lump, chemo, rads) for IDC last December, since then taking tamoxifen.

I've found another lump in the same breast and I'm pooing my pants that it's back again. I see my onc on thurs. Can't stop googling recurrence stuff, blogs, searching this site for info. This is all consuming.

Just need a few cuddles to help me get through the next few days.

Thanks, Julie.

Jennt28

Hope that the time until Thursday goes quickly for you Julie - big smooshy hug from me! At least it's a short week with ANZAC Day on Wednesday...



Jenn

Racy

Julie, just a suggestion to speed up the process if you can't stand the waiting: If you could see your GP earlier, you might be able to get some reassurance and a referral for testing so you would have the results when you see your onc on Thursday.



If your new lump is in the same area of the breast it could be post surgical. You had full treatment which should have killed all cancer only a few months ago.



Wishing you a good outcome. It is good that you are vigilent.

Karen3

Hi jgbartlett - like the post earlier, I just want to congratulate you on being so vigilent - if you look at my signature you can see that my own vigilence meant that my second BC (in opposite breast in my case) was found at a much earlier stage than my first diagnosis and I had a clean mammo and ultrasound! I KNEW something was wrong and found the changes early. The chances are that this new lump is scar tissue BUT it might not be. You are your own best advocate and get this checked out quickly - if only to give you peace of mind.

All the best to you,

Karen.

jgbartlett

For some reason now I can't stop touching / feeling my boobs. Something in the back of my mind has told me all along that this is not the end of it - I've just got this feeling it's going to come back eventually.

This lump is not in the same spot as the last.  The last one was 12 o'clock about 9cm from nipple (I have pretty big boobs).  This one is about 2 o'clock 2 cm from nipple.  But they did take a huge chunk with my lumpectomy - I think it was about 8cm x 9cm x 5cm or something like that, so I suppose it's a big area that is still recovering.

Now I also think that I have a swollen lymph node - but I'm not sure if that is all in my head !!!!

Racy, I should have gone to my GP and got the mammo done b4 the onc appt. Too late now, Thursday can't come soon enough, it will be interesting just to see if my onc can feel it.

Thanks for your kind words and support.

Julie.

camillegal

What a terrible feeling to wait, but it's not always bad. i hope it good for u Julie and just part of all u went thru,  Good luck

Everlastpink

Hi Julie,

I just wanted to let you know I totally understand because I am in a similar position.  I am in the 3rd year since dx.  Last week my rads onco said he felt something in my "good" breast.  I can't feel anything there.  He made an appt. with my breast surgeon for this Friday and I am also going nuts. Like you, I keep feeling around to see what he might have felt.  I know my breast surgeon will do a sono and then decide if there is anything that needs a biopsy.  I am trying not to "pre-worry" but it is really hard to wait.

I am trying to keep my mind off of it by going outside and enjoying the pretty weather, doing my nails, watching movies.  But I have also been doing crazy things like researching where I would get a second opinion this time, so I totally know how you feel.

I also wanted to say that I bet in your case it could be scar tissue, but it is always important to get everything checked out.  I hope that it is scar tissue and that your doctor can give you some reassurance.  I'll be thinking of you.

Katherine

madpeacock

Hang in there Julie! It's already Monday morning (here - even later for you!), so Thursday will be here soon. Hugs to you. I'll send my kitty over - he's an excellent snuggler. 

Katherine - thinking of you too. Hope the week flies by for you and the results are negative.  

LuAnnH

I can understand how frightening it must be to find a lump after going through all that tx!!   You realize this can be a new primarty and coud be removed with little to no other tx if it is very early stage.  The good thing is you were being proactive avo no sitting back qne ignoring the changes to your body.  Good luck, I'll have to check back for your results.

Racy

Julie, what time is your appointment on Thursday?



I'm hoping it's scar tissue based on your description. Was the incision near 2 o'clock?



Katherine, hoping your lump is b9 too. I see you are on Aromasin so hopefully that prevents any nasty cells proliferating.

jgbartlett

Racy, no the incision was at 12o'clock, about 8cm from nipple. My appointment is 3pm - but I've got a hectic day at work scheduled tomorrow, so hopefully I won't get a chance to think about it too much.  I'm also supposed to be leaving early Friday morning to drive to Sydney for a training course over the weekend, and then come back to Wagga for another 3 days training there. So I'll leave Friday am, and not return home till next Thursday pm. 

I've been thinking about cancelling all the training, but I'm trying to stay positive and I keep telling myself it's probably benign and nothing, and I've been trying to get onto both of these courses for ages. 

So I think it will all come down to my oncs reaction tomorrow. Will she feel it?, what does she think it is?, does she think it's urgent that I get the tests underway? have my tumour markers changed?. I guess I'll decide if I'm cancelling everything after I see her.

Katherine - I'm thinking about you too, hope your not going stir crazy waiting.

madpeacock - I've got plenty of kitty's here, my daughter wants to be in animal rescue when she grows up and she is getting plenty of practice (we have 5 cats !!!!)

Thanks to everyone for your posts.     Cheers,  Julie.

Racy

Julie, I agree, the doctor's impression will give you a good guide as to whether you can delay the mammogram. Do they run the training often? If needed, could you slip away from training to get the mammogram?



You sound like you will make a sound decision, but one thing that I have learnt through having BC is that health comes before work.



Good luck with your appointment and working out what to do. Remember we are here if you need any help.

ali68

Good luck I have everything crossed for you.



Alison

Galsal

Here's your cuddle hug....only good news permitted for you!

Racy

Julie, waiting a week for tests probably won't affect your prognosis but way cause an extra week of worry.

Moderators

(((((((((HUGS))))))))))  

 

Julie, we are thinking of you and good luck with your appointment tomorrow.

 

The Mods 

Everlastpink

Hi Julie,

Just adding to the chorus of everyone here who is thinking of you.  Hope you get some answers tomorrow (or today, your time).

I am still trying to keep busy, though cannot see how I could have a new tumor in my other breast, since I have been on aromasin and had my ovaries out.  I can't feel anything either.

I hope you have good news and maybe I will too.

((((((Julie)))))

 xxxoo

Katherine

ali68

Good luck Katherine will be thinking of you too.

Cocker_Spaniel

Katherine just adding my good wishes for you.  It could be a seroma that is fluid filled and can come at any stage if you have had breast surgery.  They are NOT cancer and you cannot feel the fluid.  Hugs and more hugs with all my good wishes that its benign. Annie    

Jennt28

Thursday evening here and just popped in to see if you've been past. Hope it all went well today...



Jenn

txstardust

I'm hoping all is well with your testing.  I know that the waiting is torturous, as I am currently experiencing it as well.  Sending all kinds of good thoughts your way.

jgbartlett

Ok so saw the onc today and this is what she said.  She could definately feel the lump, and she could also feel a thickening around my nipple - but she didn't feel it was anything to be overly concerned about. She said it felt more like the type of lump you get with a blocked duct. She also felt my lymph nodes along the outside of my breast and said the swelling there was lymphodema.

So I walked out feeling relief. I'm still going away and am booked in for a mammo/ultrasound on 7th May.  I guess I'll know for sure after that.

Let's hope she is right.  Thanks again for all your posts.

ali68

That sounds good and if she was worried you would be booked in now. Can't you push for it straight away so you don't have to wait.

Racy

Julie, enjoy your training and let us know how the scans go on 7th.

Everlastpink

Hi Julie,

That all sounds reassuring.  Lymphadema is not fun, but certainly is manageable.  I had very mild lymphodema right after my surgery too, but it does not cause me too much trouble and if it does, I wear my groovy sleeve from the Lymphadivas!

I hope everything is confirmed on May 7.

I will let you know what I find out tomorrow.

Katherine

jgbartlett

Good luck Katherine

Everlastpink

Good news, I think.  My breast surgeon did ultrasound on both breasts and said she saw nothing that concerned her too much.  She saw a slightly enlarged lymph node in my "good" breast, which is what she thought the rads onco felt.  She said it was too small to biopsy and she was not worried about it.  She told me to have my regular annual mammo/sono in July, as was previously scheduled, and to come see her again after that.

She was very reassuring.  Now I can enjoy my weekend!

Jennt28

Julie and Katherine - glad to hear you both got good news!



Jenn