"Listen"

Kicks

When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving advice you have not done what I asked.



When I ask you to listen to me and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel the way I do, you are trampling on my feelings.



When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem, you have failed me, strange as that may seem.



Listen! All I asked was listen, not talk or do - just hear me.



Advice is cheap: 10 cents will get you both Dear Abby and Billy Graham in the paper. And I can do for myself; I'm not helpless. Maybe I'm discouraged and faltering, but not helples.



When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself, you contribute to my fear and weakness.



But when you accept as a simple fact that I do fl what I feel, no matter howirrational, then I can quite trying to convince you and can get about the business of understanding what's behind this irrational feeling. And when that's clear, the answer is obvious and I don't need advice.



Irrational feelings make sense when we understand what's behind them.



Perhaps that's why prayer works, sometimes, for some people because God is mute and He doesn't give advice or try to fix things. "They" just listen and let you work it out for yourself.



So please listen and just hear me. And if you want to talk, wait a minute for your turn: and I'll listen to you.



Anonymous





The other day I was going through some of my 'stuff' and found this handout from the last Retreat I went to. Thought I'd pass it along. It is a bit dated - 10 cent paper with Dear Abby and Billy Graham - but it says a lot that is still pertinent today.

This isn't just for loved ones of cancer survivors but for all of us. It is so easy to want to just make things 'better', be in our own world where we really don't listen, put our ways of doing/handling which while perhaps the best for us but not for all. Please take a minute to "Listen".

Blessings2011

I hear you, Kicks....

And you are absolutely right!!!!

LADYGIGI

  Thanks KIcks You just made me feel and understand my Mom's diagnosis and her feelings.