Anxiety and Depression

barbiecorn

I can see from a lot of the postings here, it does take a long time to adjust to having BC - I had my BMX on 2/1 and was fine and strong at first. I think I just knew I had no choice but now that surgery is 2 months ago, the depression and the anxiety has set in.  I am going back to work next week to stop thinking so much about the fears, etc. of recurrence and I do suffer from PTSD so I am on anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds but I never thought I would take it this hard.  Thank God for the meds.  Can you tell me how you felt after diagnosis and surgery and how long before you started to feel better and accept what has happened to you.

dlb823

barbie, you're just barely past a BMX, and IMO, expecting way too much of yourself if you're wondering if you should be anywhere near over what you've been through!  In fact, most of us are in such shock when we're dx'd, our normal, survival instinct is to compartmentalize and suppress our thoughts and emotions until we're done with our tx.  It's only then -- after things have settled down -- that we can work through all those feelings and emotions.

It's great that you feel well enough to go back to work, and hopefully that will help you get your mind on more interesting and enjoyable things.  But don't expect to be able to shut the door and put this experience behind you that quickly.  Each of our journeys is unique, but recovery from bc as a process that takes awhile.  I had more tx than you did, but I think it took me a good year after I finished chemo & RT to even begin to get my life back again, and I'm still working on it. Hopefully, yours will be a lot quicker, but it's still going to take some time and patience.  But you'll get there!    (((Hugs)))  Deanna 

barbiecorn

Thank you so much Deanna...I so appreciate your responding...It is good to know I am not the only one who felt this way....That is how I felt...I held it all together through everything and one month after the BMX is when the depression and anxiety started.  It is like I was finally able to realize what had happened to me and it was scary.  I figured if I was handling it so well before during and after then why should I feel so bad now, but I guess I held all the emotions in in order to get through it and now I am letting them out.  Thank you....((((hugs))))

dlb823

barbie, one of the things that helped me -- and I didn't even attend it -- was a flyer I saw where I had my RT that was for a weekend workshop for people recovering from cancer tx.  At the time, I wasn't ready for it, but the fact that the hospital psychologist & docs knew that we all could benefit from that much help opened my eyes to the fact that recovery wasn't going to happen automatically or quickly.

A couple of other things I've done that have been helpful to me are walking -- both for the physical & psychological benefits -- and trying to do little getaways with my DH when I can. Research has shown that exercise really does help reduce the risk of recurrence, and it also gives me plenty of alone time to think about, release and process what I've been through.  And the weekend getaways seem to get my mind out of bc mode and into new things.  Also, if you are planning to still do any more surgeries (like recon), I found that getting all of those behind me was very important to moving forward.     Deanna

barbiecorn

Deanna - I have been walking everyday.  My weekends are much better than my weekdays as my DH and I are more active on the weekends doing things with friends/family.  That is why I am going back to work on Thurs. as I know that keeping busy with other things is the best thing for me now.  Thank you again. (((hugs)))