Haven't felt this fear in quite some time

finallynow

Yay!!!  That is so wonderful!!

Lauralove

Sandy! I just cried so much after following all of your posts all month and to see it was nothing only reminds me that the mind can do damage to a person by filling them with worry and anxiety but the power of prayer and support is amazing! This story gives me hope that I can go on with life after the BIg "C"! God works in mysterious ways and maybe he was just sending this to you to show you that you should still look after yourself the best way you know how and that he's got you in his hands no matter what! I'm so happy for you! Now you have peace of mind and there is nothing better than that! CELEBRATE EVERYDAY! Amen!

I'm also a BC survivor, yes I am getting chemo next week Tuesday for the first time but I'm alraedy claiming that I'm cancer free and so it is! I hada lumpectomy in February and I had no lymph node involvement and stage 1 grade 1 so I'm glad for that. I have Pet scans and bone scans next week just to be sure of everything and of course I'm nervous about it but I have to be strong for my kids and my hubby and family. But enough about me! I'm celebrating your triumph! All is well my love, you are well and will always be well.

reesie

This is so good to hear Sandy - now we know where to tell people to look when they have scans that show something and we're trying to convince them it might be benign.



So glad it was benign crap just turning your life upside down. Now go out and celebrat (when you're up to it again) !

nora_az

Something guided me to this story here at 2.30am. I am in a state of panic here and I SWORE I would stay off the internet for the past 2 days. I said I would go on it for facebook, paying bills but NO GOOGLE SEARCHING on lung cancer and most definitely not this forum where I'm going to be scared.

Well here it is 2.30am and I lied. I am here because I wanted info on what I am in store for tomorrow and I am petrified and this was the first post I came to.

I was diagnosed with ER+ PR+ Her2+ September '10. I am staged currently at IIa.  I just finally finished up my Herceptin last Thanksgiving time and had my port removed. My last oncology appointment was my 3 month check last month. I felt so good when I was told, "You wont have to be seen for 6 months now but call us if you have anything different going on with your body and we'll get you right in to be seen for an evaluation"

Well fast forward to a week ago last Wednesday I woke up at 3am. I felt a chest sort of cramp in my back. The type that everyone gets where it hurts to take a deep breathe that go away in a matter of minutes by stretching? Well this wasn't budging when I was stretching. It lasted all day long. I thought I would sound like a wimp to call the onc on the first day of something like that going on so I thought to myself that if it was still hurting on Thursday I'd call my onc.  Well, Thursday around 4am I woke up again and it was really hurting when I was breathing in. I called my onc in the morning and she got me in ASAP, did blood work and a chest xray. Told me it all looked fine and told me to take tylenol for pain but she also wasn't satisfied with that she also wanted to do a ct scan "Just in case" I told her I thought it was feeling better so I wasn't sure but I'd think about it. She told me she would schedule it for Monday and that if I felt I wanted to cancel it that gave me a weekend to see if I got better.

Friday comes and I had another bad night (it seems to only be bad at nights) I called my onc. I told her the tylenol's not cutting it, please give me something else as I cant take NSAIDS, advil etc. It really limits me. She said she would but then my CT scan is something I really need to do, thinking about cancelling should not be an option.

I had my CT on Monday. Tuesday morning bright and early I get a call from my onc telling me I have a nodule on my lung, there are some lymph nodes on the sternum that look a bit swollen and something about something else, my mind went into a haze, Oh yes, "suspicious for metastasis" was a phrase that I remember hearing too. She would schedule a lung biopsy and I would hear back as soon as it's scheduled for instructions etc.

Tomorrow bright and early I have my ct guided lung biopsy. I am scared to death that I am going to cross the road to stage IV after this biopsy. Reading this really helped. It at least gave me a little bit of hope.

patsfan

nora- So sorry for what you are going through right now.  I know what you mean about staying off the internet.  It's a great resource and everyone on bco is so comforting and knowledgeable.  But sometimes it's scary.  Good Luck today.  Praying for a good report for you. 

nora_az

Thank you!!!   I am headed off for the hospital in a few minutes

Summer38

Good luck Nora - Hoping for good results!!

SandyInNj

Oh Nora, I'm so sorry you're going through the same stuff I just had to endure, but I'm glad that my story could give you some hope that it turns out to be nothing.  Please keep us posted.

And I have to say to the rest of you, your replies have really touched me.  It reminds me why I originally had come here many years ago.  Only those of us who's lives have been touched by cancer can possibly understand what we go through when something isn't quite right.

Lindissima

Sandy,

I am so happy for you!  Wonderful news (and sorry about that drainage tube!)

Nora, best of luck to you.  Hope all turns out well. 

nora_az

Sandy,

I am so glad your results turned out to be just fine. We shall see about mine now. I must admit the biopsy wasn't as big and scary as it sounds. In fact I found it much easier than the biopsy they did on my breast  (OUCH!!!)   The only thing was once the needle came out my lung HURT!!  I could hardly move or breathe!  Still hurts when I breathe in but I will take that any day over how bad I thought the biopsy experience (needle going through the skin etc) was going to be. 

SandyInNj

I'm glad that your were able to have a successful CT guided biopsy procedure, that may spare you the procedure I went through, which definately wasn't a walk in the park.  Lungs weren't meant to be punctured with sharp objects!  Damn that hurts.

How long before they have the pathology back?

I'm going back to see my surgeon earlier than expected.  I'm having some problems, but not with what I had expected.  I'm not having much lung pain or breathing problems.  What I am having though are RELENTLESS episodes of feeling extremely hot, then shaking chills, rinse and repeat.  I have no fever.  My blood pressure is high (157/108), heart rate is elevated (113 bpm) and I feel utterly crappy.  Didn't fall asleep until around 4 a.m. this morning and when I woke up at 7, I was drenching wet with sweat. 

I had mentioned a couple posts back that my PET scan had mentioned "symmetric thyroid uptake, may be related to thyroiditis".  So now I'm thinking the surgery and/or anesthesia could have triggered some weird metobolic issue.  Ugh, if it's not one thing it's another (but as long as it's not cancer, I'm going to try my best not to complain!)

I'll be sending good vibes your way - keep in touch Nora.

nora_az

Hi Sandy, I find out about my biopsy by tomorrow (Friday) or no later than Monday. I hear the phone ring a few times today and I was cringing. It's weird. I dont want to know! I think that pretty much is telling me that I know it's cancerous but I dont it confirmed.

I will most definitely come on here ot let you girls know

XX   thanks!

SandyInNj

Know what you mean - after I had my PET scan, I was at work when my phone rang and saw my doctors office phone number appear on the screen, answered and it was my doctor himself, which even made my fear worse.  Turned out he just wanted to give me the good news himself.  It's an awful feeling to just wait for "the call". 

You will get through this.  Deep breathe.

nora_az

OMG OMG!!!!!!!!!!   I have a lung infection!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   I am so happy!  They dont know what it is yet or how to treat it nad they are going to call on Monday to tell me how to procede but I will take this ANY day over the dreaded "c" word!!!!!

Yippeeeeeeeeeeee

Janie-bug

OH WOW!!!!!!! Nora_az I am so happy for you. A lung infection!!!!!!! that is awsome news!!!!!!!....Yippeeeeeeee. I hope you get that infection cleared up quickly and keep smiling yeah I know your smiling I'm smiling for you to.

nora_az

Thank you!!!   The roller coaster I've been through the past week and how I was so convinced I was going to hear it was cancer!!!    I am sooooooooooo happy. I dont care what sort of infection it is or what needs to be done. I can get trhough it!

Anonymous

So good to hear, Nora.  And Sandy.  So good to hear.

nora_az

Thanks everyone!

Sandy.....are you feeling any better?  What did the doctor say about those symptoms?  Did you sleep better last night?

xx

SandyInNj

There you go, TWO of us with lung infections being scared out of our minds!  Those "spots" on CT's certainly can cause ones' life to be thrown into chaos for awhile.

I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU, for us!  WOOOHOOOO!!

I'm not sure how they'll treat yours, being they treated mine by removing part of my lung!  It almost feels so unnecessary that I did that, but it was that, or wondering for the next so many months/years if I had something that was ultimately going to kill me.  So although it gave me peace of mind (which really is priceless), the flip side was 5 days in the hospital, 3 weeks out of work, along with pain and all the ick that goes along with it.  Still, what were my choices.

According to the pathology report that I asked my doctor for yesterday, here's the diagnosis: Lung parenchyma with atelectasis (huh?); two subpleural lymph nodes with benign reactive hyperplasia and anthracosis; no evidence of malignancy is identified.

^^I always ask for copies so that I can read it myself - it's so satisfying to read those last words!

Oh, and those symptoms I was experiencing, I had figured out the night before I saw him, and after seeing him yesterday and discussing my theory, he agreed with my accessment.  While in the hospital, I had been on heavy pain meds around the clock for 5 days and was given Oxycodone to take, as needed for pain once I was discharged.  Well, I never really had much pain once I left, so I didn't take any pain meds.  Those symptoms I described before were getting worse and worse.  Then, I had some pain on Thursday evening, so I decided to take a pain pill and, lo and behold, all those miserable symptoms DISAPPEARED!.  Then after reading the internet, I realized I was withdrawaling from pains meds!  My husband jokes with me and calls me a junkie now LOL.  Doc just said take the pain meds if I need them, but I take pain meds for pain, didn't want to take them to alleviate withdrawal symptoms!  But, until I'm weaned off of them, I suppose I have to, otherwise, I really do feel awful.  It is getting somewhat better though.

Anyway Nora, back to you, I AM SO HAPPY for you, and if you didn't live across the country from me, I'd say meet me out for a celebratory drink!! Yay!!!

nora_az

Yea, New Jersey to Phoenix is a bit of a long way to meet up for a celebratory drink but it would be great! 

So you're saying you are a junkie in need of her fix?  LOL (sorry I couldnt help but say that!!)  How long were you told you were supposed to be in the hospital after your surgery? I know there were complications and that's why you were there longer.

After we got the news my husband was CRYING. I guess I didn't stop to think of how this had been affecting him at all. He was so happy last night when we went out to dinner to celebrate, he couldnt quit looking at me and hugging me and telling me how happy he is.

My husband and normally dont have the best of a relationship but I think we all need to realize what sort of hell they go through as well. I think yesterday really let me see it.

I am hoping I dont have to have part of my lung removed like you did, I dont want the nodules there either (I found out there were three during the biopsy, I had thought it was just one) It's causing pain when I breathe etc. All I know is I can get through anything here as long as I know it's not cancer. I am being treated at the Mayo and that always makes me feel assured. They treat all sorts of strange ailments there and will know what to do and get to the bottom of this.

Hugs

Nora XX

Moderators

We are soooo happy for you! Take care of yourself this weekend!

Your Mods 

SandyInNj

Yup, I had pain too (before surgery) when I breathed, so it will be interesting to see, once I"m all healed up, if that pain is gone too.  I'm hoping by them removing this thing that it will have also removed the chest/back discomfort i've had for the past 5+ weeks.  (to answer your question: I was only supposed to be in the hospital until Monday at the lastest, but because of the drainage accident, got out a day later.)

With my mastectomy, I was only in the hospital 24 hours so I was only on a morphine drip (patient controlled) for a short time.  So I had never experience drug withdrawal.  Now I get how people can get addicted to that crap after a surgery, but being Im so drug-phobic, believe me, I will ditched these things asap.  In fact, my last one was at 11:30 p.m. last night and I don't feel like I need any.  So maybe the worst is over.

My husband looks at me all teary-eyed too, hugging me alot.  I think they run through the gammit of emotions just like us...the "what-ifs".  I looked at him last night at dinner and thanked him for everything he's done for me to help me through all of this, and for being at the hospital for 10-12 hours a day, only leaving a few minutes to eat something.  After nearly 28 years of marriage, he's still my rock.

nora_az

It appears we are the same age, Sandy.

I'll keep you updated on what they say about me. I did the relay for life yesterday but only was at the opening ceremony, did a couple of laps and had the survivior dinner. My right lung is KILLING me now. It feels heavy and full. When I talk I can barely talk a sentence without getting winded. I dont think that outdoor air was good for me.

patsfan

Nora- so happy for your wonderful news.  The pain is easier to deal with when you know the cause and it's not the dreaded c-word.  Hope you feel better soon.

A group of us are thinking of doing the Relay in June.  We have always done "Making Strides", but it is very disorganized here so we are thinking of switching. 

nora_az

Ok here's my return and report....

The surgeon knew what she was going to do before she even saw me in person. She walk in and says, "Dr Northfelt (my onc)  is not going to leave you alone is he?" and she sort of chuckles. I said, "I know it!!   She told me that my onc called her early Monday morning tell her that she had to see me and he wanted that nodule out of there. The nodule is about 2 cm and near the pleura   and it's rubbing on that area when I breathe in and that's what's causing the pain. There is also another spot but it's in a very difficult location and very small. She think's its some sort of pneumonia or valley fever infection in there, she's not thinking cancer. She said the biopsy is clear but there's still a very slim chance that's what it is but she really doesnt think so. She is going to leave the small area alone unless she opens up the large nodule and doesnt like what she sees, then she will get the other one out. Problem is she'd have to remove part of the lung to do that and she doesnt want to, so if the large nodule is what she thinks, she'll just leave the other one alone.

I felt in very good hands, my surgery will be scheduled soon.

patsfan

Glad to hear the good news.  It's a good feeling when you are confident with your Drs. Good luck with your surgery and keep us posted.

SandyInNj

If you have to have that part of your lung removed, I can say that I'm recovered very well where my lung and breathing is concerned, I can now breathe every bit as deep as I used to, and without any pain at all now. 

So this thing I had must have been doing something similar as yours and causing pain when I breathed deep or cough, but now that it's out and my lung has recovered, I feel good, so I guess I have to credit the wedge resection for that. 

I'm still having some issues with tenderness/achiness around the skin where the incision areas are and also some problems with my energy level, but I'm heading back to work on Tuesday - I'm ready to get back in the swing of things, even if I only stay partial days.

Keep us posted on your surgery date.

nora_az

Sandy....

She told me it was an easy surgery (to get to that larger nodule) for her. Not so much for me. What you were discribing is what she told me. She said it will be very painful afterwards and that's why I have to be in the hospital is for pain control. She also said I will be hurting for more than a month afterwards. Also, for up to 9 months I will get shooting pains that will come and go.

Hang in there. I wish you had a few more days off to recover.

nora_az

May 22st is the date. They want to do a hysterectomy ooverectomy and the lung surgery at the same time.

SandyInNj

Oh boy, you have quite a bit of a road ahead of you yet.  How are you feeling about all of this?

You now have a date and a plan and hopefully peace of mind once everything is out of your body that could cause you harm.  The surgery is still a bit of a ways off, the wait alone would make me anxious..I've never been known for my patience, especially with these types of things.