What's your therapy?

PlantLover

So, you're really upset and angry with a co-worker, a relative, an ex-husband, etc and if you don't rid yourself of the feelings you know they will just fester and multiply day after day.  What do you do?

Some of the most therapeutic & freeing words I have ever written are in letters I have composed but never intended to send.  Give it a try sometime when you really need to vent.  It works wonders for your spirit!!

I think I'll compose a letter to Breast Cancer next. 

thefuzzylemon

PlantLover ... oh if I could only tell you how upset I am... I will give this a try today....

PlantLover

Fuzzy ... I found the "Romp Room" thread and now understand why you are so upset.  ((( You )))

Give the letter writing a try. 

The reason I started this thread ...

When I received the most recent nasty email from "He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named", I started to send a really crappy reply.  Instead, once again, I simply wrote a response that I had no intention of sending and finished it yesterday.  It's two pages long and it made me feel so much better!  Unfortunately, I've had to write so many therapeutic responses to him that I risk exhausting my hard disk capacity. LOL!

Anyway, I thought I'd share the idea with you guys.  I hope some of you find it useful and will share your ideas for dealing with this sort of crap too!

jennyboog

I really need to try this too, I have no therapy.  I have had problems with anger since dx.  I think I'm angry at the BC or the situation and take it out on everyone else in my path, add the no ER into that and it makes for bad storm.

Elizabeth1959

I feel angry too.  I think I'm angry with breast cancer.  I'm angry that I'm missing a breast, that I have to have a painful surgery to recreate some semblance of a breast.I'm angry that it hurts when I raise my right arm in the air.  I'm angry that I'm stiff as a board on AI's  I'm angry that I do not know if I have a future to look forward to and on and on.  I tried therapy.  My not very insightful therapits told me that I needed a better sense of humour.  I was too serious.  Well *@&*, I've always been a serious person.  At 52 years of age, I doubt I'm going to become more lighthearted now.  His suggestions included watching a comedy on tv.  I don't think an episode of the 3 stooges is going to improve my mood.

faithfulheart

Hey girls, can I put my 2 cents in. Lately I have been really upset too. I was 2 years post dx in

sept, and I think I have been doing really well, but not through the holidays!!! I can't seem to shake my anger. stupid stuff like, I wish people cherished there health more, or jealous of another mom already planning for her 11 yr olds colledge education!!! Really? I want to see my kids graduate from highschool, and thats a long way off. I pray alot, and I do like the idea of writing, however, I am just not that good at the journal thing. I don't know why it's been so hard lately, I probebly need to exersize more!!! Who knows, feels good to not be alone......

 OH and like jenny said,  the no est in my body does not help the situation, AT ALL!!!!!

Happy feelings to alll...............

steph

Linda-n3

Elizabeth, I can relate to having a therapist who totally doesn't get it.  I had one that told me my only problem was I needed better time managment.  REALLY???? I HAVE TAUGHT TIME MANAGEMENT COURSES AND MANAGE MORE IN A DAY than he could imagine!!!

So I got a different therapist, she was an oncology nurse before she became a counselor.  She has been wonderful!  Get someone you can work with and it will help a lot - if you have someone who you don't trust, you will be wasting your time (and the therapist's time!).

Faithfulheart, I have had the anger that I have mostly aimed at the BS, probably because she is the least personable of all my docs and because I feel like she just blows me off with any of my concerns.  I still have pain 4 months after surgery that I really don't think is the "normal" kind of pain, so I have been angry with her and blaming her for causing the pain from the type of procedure she did.  I don't have that kind of energy to waste on the anger.  I read that forgiving others is a gift you give yourself.  I have slowly let much of my anger go over the past week and althought I hate to admit it, I think it has been good for my mood and energy.  Something inside just doesn't want to let that anger go, even though I know it is healthier to do so.  Sending you prayers for healing and peace and freedom from pain, fear, and anger. (hugs)

Linda-n3

Oh, yes.... I have done journaliing, sometimes it helps, sometimes it just takes too much time.  I feel better when I do, though!

I really am wanting to get back to my painting as it is the best therapy for me. 

MiniMacsMom

I have found that sometimes I am angry at the cancer. Not particularly because I am missing a boob but because it affects everything and everyone in my family.  It seems that every decision we make we make with the cloud of BC or chemo over our heads.  I can't take my son out to do all the normal young kid things because he will be exposed to germies and I can't afford to get sick on chemo.  My hubby has had to take on a ton more house hold responsibility. Even doing normal things like travelling or grocery shopping are a difficult. 

My anger at that is transient it comes and goes, but it does make me significantly more volitile to other stressors.  In the beginning, of DX I always had a it could be worse attitude, now it seems like stupid things drive me NUTs.  (I have to say that the chemopause is prolly not helping this..) 

I sat down my hubby and explained to him my feelings on all this, because he kept blowing me off and saying, we don't need to talk you are going to be fine.  And I finally was like NO, I do need to tell you how I feel about all this so you understand why I get mad or sad or upset in general.  Things between us have been much better since then. 

Otherwise, I have just beeing trying to spend time with friends as a form of therapy.  And I just started germinating seeds.  Its the best thing in the world to watch my son check on the sleeping baby seeds   He is a joy!  I haven't found much else yet that allieviates the stress other than the forums!