vent about friends in chemo

fredntan

I just have to get this off my chest. I felt kind of hurt. I made a couple of "friends" in chemo. we exchanged numbers-or I gave one of them my number. I've talked to one of phone. well yest one of them came in and the other was supposed to be there. the one lady commented that they were supposed to go out for chinese after chemo. Hello! I like chinese too! whatever. am not sure if they don't want to be friends because I'm stage 3 or because I've allready had my mastectomy surgery.  

I've had so many friends dump me because I have cancer. I've tried reaching out to them. I know I'm also excluding myself. I'm pretty much staying home/just going to grocery store. I've made up my own little world and its working out fine. I havn't caught anything. I'm not depressed anymore and go for long walks daily. A phone call. or text from my friends would be nice. they better not come looking for me when they are dx with breast cancer.

only 6 more weeks of taxol left. then on to rads. just feeling a little bitchy from the decadron yest. and had to get that off my chest. the little old ladies like me in chemo. they try to teach me to knit. my hands shake to bad. they're going to try crochetting with me next. I love little old ladies.

and I will be one one day. going for long walk. arrggghhh hate being rejected by people!!!!!!!!!!! 

invirginia

Oh Fran, that sucks! Even my 9-yr-old knows not to mention events around kids who aren't invited like birthday parties and such. How insensitive of that person, although they might not have even been aware of what they did--but adults should know better. Well, if I was there I would go get Chinese with you! :-) 

MaxineO

Sorry to hear you're being treated so badly Fran! That was just insensitive.  I found a lot of friends dumped me, too. Like they are afraid cancer is contagious...especially if you're stage 3!  Vent away. It's a tough journey you're taking here.  Take your long walk and enjoy yourself.

I would take you out for Chinese, too!

fredntan

what should I do about my local friends? only a few have sorta kept in touch with me. the most they do is play words with friends with me. before I started chemo I told them I would be a hermit. I guess we really don't have anything to talk about. kwim? 

think I will just keep that anger in. I want them to teach me to run. a lot of my work friends run.

I've asked the cancer navigator to  hook me up with someone local that would like to go for chinese. 

just sometimes it seems like everyone around me doesn't have bad things happen to them.

this is not my first major crisis. My now 15 yr old was dx with type 1 diabetes 6 years ago. thank god she had her teenage rebellion from that last winter and manages everything very well.

my other dd broke her leg really bad a few years ago-was in long leg cast 4 long months-didn't heal and had to so  rod and pin surgery-I still havn't told my DH that the rod and pins need coming out-just been too much going on. My marriage has never been easy, but after 24 years I'm leaning on him.

I know other people have issues much worse than mine. just in my neighborhood-parents are both looking at felony charges for tax fraud or somehting like that. losing everything and lookinng at jail. one kid nearby is probably going to be admited to state psyc hosp for life. then a father beat his dd so bad she had to move out.

okay got all that out too. had lunch going for walk. I t hink my steroids are making me more bitchy than usual. 

LittleFlower

Sorry you had your feelings hurt.  You think someone in your shoes would know better!  Yes, treatment can make you feel isolated, It's good that you're getting out there, walking, shopping... that sounds like enough to me   I know what you mean about feeling excluded by friends etc.  You will get through this (6 to go yay!!) and life will slowly pick up where it left off.  (HUGS) from your friends on the breast cancer boards who DO GET IT!

fredntan

thanks ladies. went on my walk. worked on my arm. worked a lot of stuff out in my head. now on to the pharmacy and grocery store!!!!!!!!!