Diep 2012

Beckers

Crying in the dark while everyone sleeps...oh yes. I've probably eaten some krispy cremes in the dark while everyone sleeps too!!!

fredntan

Arggh 2 donuts in middle of night not good. Just raises my blood sugar and makes me more anxious. They are leftover from pirate day at krispy kreme.

SuzyBlue

cg1234 what you are experiencing sounds very normal to me. And yes, you will probably feel more emotional the closer you get to your surgery. The night before mine my now husband of 2 months, took me out for dinner and proposed to me! It was wonderful but when I got home I cried harder than I have in my life. Losing a breast to cancer is devastating and takes time to come to terms with. Dont be hard on yourself and don't compare your experience and emotions with others. Believe me there is just as many of us here who struggled and cried and inched our way through this ordeal.



You will find good support here without judgement.

DFOnt

What has everyone been told or when have you resumed driving? On discharge I was told probably about 2 weeks as long as I'm not on narcotics. I haven't tried yet, am only taking 1 of those at bedtime now.  Anybody ask about skiing?  I just started last year and didn't really think about it until a friend asked if I was going to get a ski pass this year.  I only do the beginner hills, have to remember to ask about that at follow up.  I certainly don't feel up to it at this point! Got my follow up appt, Oct 2. Hoping I will be able to drive myself to it!

goldlining

cg1234 - I used Vitamin V (valium) until surgery. The waiting was too much for me and I couldn't sleep at night. I only needed the smallest dose. There's no harm in short term therapy. I didn't even need to taper off. The long anaesthesia must have taken its place in my body chemistry and I haven't needed it since. Be good to you.

DFOnt the physical activity of driving is one thing, but the cognitive activity is another. It wasn't the painkillers, but the leftover fog of anaesthesia. I could drive a straight line, but I'd have been a hazard to the public if anything needed reaction time. Emergency responses and normal activities use two different brain systems and you're often not conscious of the limitations of the emergency response system until it's too late. I sat in meetings struggling to find words. I could physically get there but not process. I took the streetcar or had someone drive me. I think I probably started driving when I absolutely had to at about 2 months. Fortunately I could walk to my follow ups. If you drive, allow lots of extra time to not be under traffic pressure. Physically, your restrictions will be lifted at 6 weeks, I've read others on the DIEP forums going skiing by a couple of months. I had no problems with the surgical sites (flaps or ab) from running 21km at 6 weeks + 2 days, but I did have swelling.

bdavis

Dierdre... I just posted this.. and now its gone... hmmm

About driving, I drove at 2 weeks.

About skiing, a woman on here skiied at 5 weeks, but I wouldn't recommend it... perhaps at 2-3 months.

J-Bug

cg1234: In response to your comments about grief, some of us are in different places in our treatment. This may be why it seems like there is a different response among us. I did four months of chemo last summer, then a bmx, then a lot of physical therapy, then radiation, then a lot of physical therapy... then I had to wait six months from the end of rads for my DIEP flap. I did a lot of grieving through treatments, but by the time I got to my DIEP flap, it was more of a celebration of starting to see the end of this for me.

I just try to keep in mind that everyone's grieving process and healing path is different. Feel what you need to feel and then focus on the outcome of finding yourself cancer free at the end of this.

My mom sent me this set of cd's. She uses some others of this lady's work in the cancer care unit she works in as a social worker in another state. I found it to be extremely helpful! http://www.amazon.com/A-Meditation-Promote-Successful-Surgery/dp/1881405346

cg1234

Thanks everyone, good to know I'm not the only one up all night.  I'll have to warn my husband to expect more waterworks. 

Now, valium-filled krispy cremes...hmmm, that may be a good idea...haha!

cg1234

Oh and J-bug, my sister in law just gave me that cd! I'll try it out.

Beckers

Interesting fact about vitamin V: my doc said to take every other night and my body won't get addicted.

DFOnt

I agree with J-Bug, I am at a very different time in the whole process.  I was diagnosed 4.5 years ago, had a unilateral mastectomy, chemo and radiation...didn't even really think about reconstruction and don't remember being offered the option.  This surgery has actually been a good distraction for me from other emotional issues surrounding my marriage break down over the last couple of years.  Still I was very nervous the day or so before and wasn't entirely sure I would go through with it, even afterwards wasn't sure it was a good idea.  Still concerned about how I will manage until I am completely recovered but what's done is done.  Have to deal somehow.  The Diep itself is a positive thing.  I think of it as reclaiming my body. I hope and think it will lead to better things for me, more confidence, self esteem, normalcy.  The last few years have really taken a toll on my emotionally.  I needed to do something for myself. I thought about taking Ativan / Valium before but managed without it. To me it was like a very big roller coaster, I hate the ride up to the top, but once you get on you can't get off and usually turns out it was a good thing in the end.

DFOnt

I agree with J-Bug, I am at a very different time in the whole process.  I was diagnosed 4.5 years ago, had a unilateral mastectomy, chemo and radiation...didn't even really think about reconstruction and don't remember being offered the option.  This surgery has actually been a good distraction for me from other emotional issues surrounding my marriage break down over the last couple of years.  Still I was very nervous the day or so before and wasn't entirely sure I would go through with it, even afterwards wasn't sure it was a good idea.  Still concerned about how I will manage until I am completely recovered but what's done is done.  Have to deal somehow.  The Diep itself is a positive thing.  I think of it as reclaiming my body. I hope and think it will lead to better things for me, more confidence, self esteem, normalcy.  The last few years have really taken a toll on my emotionally.  I needed to do something for myself. I thought about taking Ativan / Valium before but managed without it. To me it was like a very big roller coaster, I hate the ride up to the top, but once you get on you can't get off and usually turns out it was a good thing in the end.

DFOnt

I agree with J-Bug, I am at a very different time in the whole process.  I was diagnosed 4.5 years ago, had a unilateral mastectomy, chemo and radiation...didn't even really think about reconstruction and don't remember being offered the option.  This surgery has actually been a good distraction for me from other emotional issues surrounding my marriage break down over the last couple of years.  Still I was very nervous the day or so before and wasn't entirely sure I would go through with it, even afterwards wasn't sure it was a good idea.  Still concerned about how I will manage until I am completely recovered but what's done is done.  Have to deal somehow.  The Diep itself is a positive thing.  I think of it as reclaiming my body. I hope and think it will lead to better things for me, more confidence, self esteem, normalcy.  The last few years have really taken a toll on my emotionally.  I needed to do something for myself. I thought about taking Ativan / Valium before but managed without it. To me it was like a very big roller coaster, I hate the ride up to the top, but once you get on you can't get off and usually turns out it was a good thing in the end.

Hoya03mom

Cg don't worry about the tears. I think all of us have shed them. I would cry in my car but on the outside I was calm. My husband said the only thing that kept him ok was that I was ok...little did he know!! But I also felt like I couldn't be too sorry for myself since I was going to be ok and my sister was dying. I do recommend a cancer support group like this on or in person where you can rant or have pity party and we all understand. Glad you got to Disney.

bdavis

Deirdre... Its ok to be on a roller coaster with reconstruction. I know I was glad, apprehensive, scared, elated etc etc... before my surgery... Afterwards, it was only positive. And I had some complications... still I am glad I went through with it. The alternatives were not appealing to me.. And in the big scheme of things, recovery time is a drop in the bucket.

bdavis

Deirdre... Its ok to be on a roller coaster with reconstruction. I know I was glad, apprehensive, scared, elated etc etc... before my surgery... Afterwards, it was only positive. And I had some complications... still I am glad I went through with it. The alternatives were not appealing to me.. And in the big scheme of things, recovery time is a drop in the bucket.

New-girl

My PS didn't let me drive for 6 weeks.  Hard but my healing went really well in part because I wasn't running errands and picking up kids. 

fredntan

I had my phone consult today with PRMA. 14 more days. getting everything ready.

said I couldn't even get something from cabinet shelf for I think a month. what is everyone doing or plan on doing to keep busy. no laundry or housework. these are things I used to do to keep me busy.

I could do some online geneology stuff. any other ideas.

can't wait for the twins to arrive 

Jennt28

I've activated my 6 month ancestry.com acess fredntan :-) Surgery is this Friday and I figure I'll be on my iPad a lot in the next few weeks...



Jenn

fredntan

Oh yeah Jenn.

michellej1980

Hi all. I'm 5 days post-BMX and DIEP surgery and am now doing well. My new boobs feel like they're under my arms though and they're all a bit misshapen and lumpy. Does this fix itself in time?



For those preparing for surgery, I have to say I am glad I did it. I feel as much like the old me as I can possibly expect to and although the first few days were really tough, I've not really suffered any pain. My tummy is quite uncomfortable and tight but I have been able to shower and wash my own hair (in a shower chair)with no problem.



Good luck to you all!

michellej1980

Hi all. I'm 5 days post-BMX and DIEP surgery and am now doing well. My new boobs feel like they're under my arms though and they're all a bit misshapen and lumpy. Does this fix itself in time?



For those preparing for surgery, I have to say I am glad I did it. I feel as much like the old me as I can possibly expect to and although the first few days were really tough, I've not really suffered any pain. My tummy is quite uncomfortable and tight but I have been able to shower and wash my own hair (in a shower chair)with no problem.



Good luck to you all!

michellej1980

Hi all. I'm 5 days post-BMX and DIEP surgery and am now doing well. My new boobs feel like they're under my arms though and they're all a bit misshapen and lumpy. Does this fix itself in time?



For those preparing for surgery, I have to say I am glad I did it. I feel as much like the old me as I can possibly expect to and although the first few days were really tough, I've not really suffered any pain. My tummy is quite uncomfortable and tight but I have been able to shower and wash my own hair (in a shower chair)with no problem.



Good luck to you all!

sunshine0406

I had a left side DIEP a year ago and I am not happy with how my tummy looks and I really hate the scar and that it is not flat it is sorta bumpyI really hate the love handles that i am left with now. I talked to my surgon about it and the jerk just said" you know what is good for that? ...exercise". Then when I said something the next visit he said "you could do lipo....but you can't afford it" I am so sad and upset I was told I would love the results but I am not loving it. I also am still having a hard time sitting up from a lying down position. Is that normal? thanks for letting me vent...I needed that.

sunshine0406

I had a left side DIEP a year ago and I am not happy with how my tummy looks and I really hate the scar and that it is not flat it is sorta bumpyI really hate the love handles that i am left with now. I talked to my surgon about it and the jerk just said" you know what is good for that? ...exercise". Then when I said something the next visit he said "you could do lipo....but you can't afford it" I am so sad and upset I was told I would love the results but I am not loving it. I also am still having a hard time sitting up from a lying down position. Is that normal? thanks for letting me vent...I needed that.

bdavis

Sunshine... First of all, I would ask if you had a DIEP or TRAM... If you can't sit up at a year out something doesn't sound right. I could sit up almost from the beginning... And I had a doctor tell me I could go to the gym to lose the love handles too.. I didn't use him.

fredntan

Michelle i had my phone consult today, and i think she said they would start out on the harder side and would soften over time. So glad you are doing well



Sunshine what a jerk

mommaof4

I'm finally here in Charleston  My mom and I arrived here today from Chicago and checked in at Hope Lodge around 2:00 (very nice).  Tomorrow I have MRA in the am and then my first face to face with Dr Kline at 2:00 (can't wait to finally meet him).  Stage 1 DIEP is early am on Wed followed by 5 nights in the hospital.  I have been so nervous for the last 2 months but for some reason I am strangely calm now...  Just hoping not to have too much pain or any complications so I can get back home to my babies!

 cg1234- I feel so bad and remember being where you are...  I was diagnosed about 1 1/2 years ago and even though I went from a DCIS diagnosis to being invasive and HER2+, I still think that the whole not knowing was the absolute worst.  I felt that after I knew what I was facing then I could make a plan and things would go up, up, up from there.  I went through a bilateral mx, chemo, rads, Herceptin, bad te's and implants, and now am in Charleston for my DIEP but I can honestly say that the time has gone by so fast.  There was definitely a lot of tears, anger, fear etc... in between.  If not for the DIEP it would all feel like a distant memory.  We have 4 children, the younngest is 8 and that was tough though.  Please feel free to pm me if you ever want to talk.  Things will get better with time...  Hugs to you

mommaof4

I'm finally here in Charleston  My mom and I arrived here today from Chicago and checked in at Hope Lodge around 2:00 (very nice).  Tomorrow I have MRA in the am and then my first face to face with Dr Kline at 2:00 (can't wait to finally meet him).  Stage 1 DIEP is early am on Wed followed by 5 nights in the hospital.  I have been so nervous for the last 2 months but for some reason I am strangely calm now...  Just hoping not to have too much pain or any complications so I can get back home to my babies!

 cg1234- I feel so bad and remember being where you are...  I was diagnosed about 1 1/2 years ago and even though I went from a DCIS diagnosis to being invasive and HER2+, I still think that the whole not knowing was the absolute worst.  I felt that after I knew what I was facing then I could make a plan and things would go up, up, up from there.  I went through a bilateral mx, chemo, rads, Herceptin, bad te's and implants, and now am in Charleston for my DIEP but I can honestly say that the time has gone by so fast.  There was definitely a lot of tears, anger, fear etc... in between.  If not for the DIEP it would all feel like a distant memory.  We have 4 children, the younngest is 8 and that was tough though.  Please feel free to pm me if you ever want to talk.  Things will get better with time...  Hugs to you

michellej1980

Thanks fredntan. I'm not panicking too much at this stage as I know it's still early days but just need some reassurance that it won't feel like this forever!