December 2011 Surgeries - want to wait together?

Moonflwr912

Kam, I had one.of my.TEs removed due to infection. I had to start and finish chemo before they could replace it and continue reconstruction. So I've been lopsided for 7 months. I.also can't start my Arimidex til next week. am I having fun yet?LOL

spunkyboobster

Kam-I agree, I love this group and look forward to everone's posts.

I've been suffering with a severe case of the blues lately.  Not sure if it's the anastrozole or the reality of all that's happened is finally hitting me-almost a year later.  Hope it passes quickly...

You all are always in my thoughts and prayers.  Praying everyone is doing well, recovering quickly and completely, and smiling whenever possible. 

Blessings2011

KAM!!! Thanks for bumping up this thread!!! I was just thinking about everyone today, and was going to go looking for it.

Yes, my exchange surgery is in 9 days - August 22nd (not that I'm counting ) and I
had my Pre-Op visit with the PS this morning. We're all squared away on what I want and don't want. He's going to have to release more of the pectoral muscle at the bottom, near my IMF, so the implants fill the skin out better. And he might do a lateral capsulorraphy - narrowing of the pockets - because the implants I'm getting (Allergan Natrelle High Profile Smooth Saline 700ccs) are narrower than my current TEs. He'll see once he starts "trying on" different implants with different fills.

The cool thing about the saline implants is that they can be deflated before putting them into the pockets, then individually reinflated to just the right amount. That means going in through tinier incisions in the old MX incisions.

He said to expect about 2 hours in the OR (with general anesthesia), about 2 hours in Recovery, and them home I go with new Ta Ta's. Absolutely no using arms for 2 weeks, then gradually get back to reaching, lifting, etc. Will have an Ace bandage after surgery, then a few days later I can change to a sports bra or a Genie bra. He'll wait til I'm fully healed from the procedures before he clears me to get fitted for an underwire bra, which he says will help mold the pockets in the right position.

How about you? Are you ready? (Silly question....)

Hi, Moonflwr912!!!! Wow - you're doing good for just having your TE replaced today! Praying that this time things go smoothly for you, with no complications, and good healing! 

Ginger! Ain't feeling "normal" wonderful? The first time you feel it, you realize how BC has taken over every aspect of your life. It gave me such a sense of freedom and hope. (FYI, I reconnected with my DH at our 30 year HS reunion. We'd gone all through school together since Kindergarten, then after HS I moved away for college, and started a career. He stayed put for college, and married and started a family. By the time of the reunion, his kids were grown, and he was widowed. We've been married since 2005.)

Spunkyboobster - So sorry to hear you're having the blues. I've heard of this letdown period...kind of like a cross between PTSD and Post-partum depression. We are so focused on surgeries and treatments and everything BC....and then.......just a pill a day. I've been thinking about that a lot -  I'll start the Anastrozole next month. I am sending you HUUUUGE comfort hugs!!!!

Sending out good wishes to all my December Sisters!!!! Hope you are all doing well and recovering nicely.

Let's keep this thread going!!!! (thanx again, Kam!)

faithhopenluv

Always love a blast of 'December' to catch up with everyone!  It is a great group and I continue to learn so much from you.

Kam - So glad you are done with chemo

I've been taking tamoxifen for nearly 2 weeks now.  It's hard to say if I have SEs or if it is lingering SEs from chemo, or I'm just different emotionally.  I cry so freaking easily.  I'm lucky to say most of the time it is something happy or positive that makes me emotional, but tears come so quickly for me.  Otherwise the hot flashes are a little worse, they had been less intense since chemo ended but they still aren't quite as bad as they were during Taxol.

Tonight is 3 weeks of wearing the BRAVA, it is going well but I literally do not have enough time in the day.  I can't do much of anything when I'm wearing them.  I'm short (5 feet nothing) so my reach isn't very long around the domes.  I've been consistently averaging 10-11 hours and see a big difference.  After the BMX the skin healed with folds but the BRAVA is puffing them out.  They deflate a bit by the end of the day, but knowing that it is working makes putting them on each night worth it.  Next surgery is 9/13

Ginger48

Spunky- I went through the same thing right around the one year mark. Kind of like "what the he** just happened to me?" I think we are forever changed and have to get used to the new normal.

Faithhopenluv- My emotions are much closer to the surface these days too; I think we are all so tired and have lost the ability to repress our feelings. 

Blessings- that is so nice that you reconnected and married your high school sweetheart. I had such a great time reconnecting with old friends and I think it was extra special because even though some of them knew about my cancer they were relating to me as they did 31 years ago. It was fun to just be the "old me" again for a while!

That being said; I was so busy this weekend and got very little sleep and it seems to have kicked up my fibromyalgia so I am paying for it now and taking a rest on the couch today. Not sure how it will go when I start back to school full time in less than 2 weeks...

Good luck to Kam and  Blessings on your surgery and congrats to Moonflwr for moving forward!

goldlining

Hi gals

I have had one session with the psycho-oncology service (a psychologist) and ranted a bit about my issues. I don't have any enjoyment from anything, just a lot of anger.  It's not the stupid BC or anything treatment and I had no chemo. It's how angry I feel at people not cutting me any slack or respecting the slack I have taken up voluntarily (or under duress) to minimize the adverse impact of my condition on other people and how tired it all makes me, and consciousness of the speculative link between stress and overwork and BC. I do nothing but work all the damned time now, to catch up. Even the psych pissed me off. I'm supposed to relax an hour a day, a day a week and a week a year. "Can you do that?" Yeah right. But I know I am supposed to say "of course you're absolutely right and I shall try my utmost to turn a new leaf", so that is what I said, but I haven't had a vacation in 12 years and not by choice. BC was the closest thing to a vacation I have had. That 12 hours sleep for DIEP was the best 12 consecutive hours I have had in years. I have pushed myself to go swim for a half hour a couple of times, but I can't run with a stress fracture at the moment, and that was the only "me time" thing I have done for the past few years. I have no option not to do the work. I have to figure some way to feel something other than anger, fear, or sadness.

So nice to read the good updates and progress from everyone. I get a little vicarious encouragement from good stories, and a little validation from the crabby and glum stories, that  maybe it's not just me and my evil people, but just lingering echoes of what we all went through. Interesting to think about.

Hugs to all. 

Ginger48

Goldlining- I am so sorry that life is not giving you a break these days. Does your job require you to work all the time? It must be so hard to never have any time for yourself. I know for myself that I would never be able to cope with all this if I was always worried about getting my work done and never having any downtime. Is there any way you can change the current situation? Sending you hugs and hoping you find a way to enjoy life again.

goldlining

Thanks Ginger. I appreciate the thoughts, and it's good to be supported. I'm a professor. Every break I take no matter how legitimate sets me back. I've typed 5,000 word papers with my left index finger because I sprained the right and the paper was due. I've written grant apps with pneumonia because there's no extensions. I've even lectured with a 103 fever, because there's no teaching assistant and students upset about cancelled classes can wreck a professor's evaluations, which has salary and promotion implications. This year I need to apply for renewal of my grant funding, because you have to find your own funds for the research half of your job, and I need to get more papers out to have a hope of renewal. I would feel pretty proud of my resilience and fortitude to bounce back and get back in the saddle if only I got respect instead of contempt. Despite the effort input, the output never seems enough. Sometimes, I even get a sense that certain powers that be think I contrived to go through this in order to have a big vacay. I know that makes them an ass, but being angry at the ass is starting to really wear me down. Thanks for putting up with my whining!

Moonflwr912

Goldlining, that is a lot on your plate. I hope you can get energy to do what you need.

CookieMonster

Hi everyone - so good to see everyone here posting. I'll save you all the pain of reading individual responses and just say that I've read it all and an happy that so many are healing well and feeling well and that I'm sorry that some are struggling. I think I'm somewhere in the middle.  I see the PS for a follow up on Friday and I'm curious about how the conversation will go. This last surgery was a lift and reduction on the non cancer breast and I'm currently not thrilled with the outcome, I hope things are still settling, but I'm pessimistic that this is actually true.

I'm getting ready to go back to work full time on Monday, summer has been a mix of getting stuff done, playing mom, a bit of travel, and relaxation. No major complaints from me about summer, except that it ends and then I have to work hard again.

HUGS to you all, smooth surgeries for those heading that direction, and happy days to all.

Blessings2011

Hellooo December Sisters!

One week to exchange....getting excited, even though the PS will probably have to do a lot of pocket work thanks to my weight loss. And - that could mean more pain, and a longer recuperation. I don't care! Just get these boulders outta me!

And I'm tired of being the Human Barometer. Every time a low weather front comes through, the TEs feel like they're going to explode. DH doesn't even have to watch the Weather Channel!

Sooooo ready for squishies!

Hope everyone is having a good night.

fitzdc

Greetings all,

Still busy trying to get my insurance issues sorted as the old insurance company sent the creditable coverage letter with the wrong dates, so back to square one again.  Next appt in September  for review prior to nipple recon. Now thinking about a lift on the non-cancer side so the breasts match, but then again might wait a few years for that surgery as tired of doctors and such.  And lucky for me, been on Tamox for months now and no horrible SEs - quite tolerable actually.  Worse, is that I have been in PT for a degenerative disc issue.  At first, I felt rather stupid being there - lots of patients learning how to walk after strokes, how to move again after a traumatic event, and I am there because it hurts when I move my head.  But for the past week - and the more I think about it the angrier I get - it seems that my therapist has no plan.  I show up and he says, "OK - we'll ride the bike."  like somehow that will help my neck.  I went along so as not to make waves, but tomorrow I am saying something.  I will ask to see his plan for me, let him know again that this PT is to avoid neck and back surgery, and question the treatment so far.  I have to believe that the Dr. who ordered the PT (3X a week with traction) is being overruled by a 25 year old PT who says 2 times a week with light stretching and biking will work.

T

QuinnCat

Goldlining- your situation sounds exhausting!  It sure sounds like academia isn't very accomodating....dog eat dog. It reminds me (though a totally different situation) of a gf who was headhunted for a fantastic job in the museum world.  It required her to move from SoCal to Seattle...... the moral of the story was that she didn't stop along the way to take care of her health (her gyn wanted her to get further tests on a mass on her ovaries) due to her new job, so when she finally took the time to take care of her health, her prognosis was not good.  Funny thing, she was let go due to budget cuts not long after her surgery.  I can think of so many times I have overproduced at work but got nothing out of it but bad health and little appreciation.  Balance. I hope you kind find some way of achieving that, even if it means a different job?

Blessings- one more week!  I wish I had you on my research team. I just can't get excited about these implant things...what, how, size etc.  I am interested in the recovery though.  I can't wait to hear about your experiences, though I'm only a week behind you.  Saline, huh?

To any of you that had chemo.. I'm 2 weeks out from last chemo and I feel more tired than ever.  Is this normal?  Unfortuneately, I have pretty severe neuropathy, still, and has made working difficult.  Hard to believe I'll be ready for surgery in 2 weeks (and technically that is 4 weeks removed from chemo, not 3, which is the requirement).  I have it good, though, at work.  Everyone understands and if I leave early, they chase me out the door.

Cookie - so, if you go back for touch ups, etc. on the reconstruction, do insurance companies balk at this?  How does this work? I can't imagine the PS will always get it right the first, or even second time, but are health insurance companies required to pay until we are satisfied with the results? 

Started Aromisim on Sunday....maybe those pills are making me feel this way?  Just exhausted.

Faith! 

CookieMonster

I honestly don't know if the insurance company will eventually say no. I can discuss all this with the PS tomorow, I suppose.

goldlining

My workload is a poison pill. Heavy enough with teaching that it keeps me from getting the research productivity that another institution would hire. And the university HR chirps "work life balance" at the same time as the dean says "you lazy people are crap!" I'm basically unemployable in any other role. I'm too old and expensive to be drafted by a new place, and even at half my salary, I wouldn't even be interviewed 99 times out of 100 because deaf people are scaaaaaary (employment equity is fiction). I'm pretty much stuck. But my secret plot is to get the final rank of promotion and then slack off. Not really, but at least start taking vacations. On the bright side, I have had a fantastic week in the field with my extracurricular students. My feet are falling off from standing and walking for 12 hours a day (and I have a stress fracture but can't wear the aircast due to need for safety shoes) and I'm just this side of sunburned, but it's just the best. Weeks like this is why I do it.

goldlining

fitzdc, I'm sorry you seem to have a dud PT. Mine has been just the life preserver for me. What we do varies from week to week based on my prime complaint at the time, but she always seems to discover the root of it all. Hope it helps to clear the air tomorrow.

Cookie, fingers crossed for your PS followup.  How hard is it to do a reduction/lift? It's like a sewing pattern. Extra degree of difficulty for matching the DIEP side, but I hope they keep on the case.

Best to all. Wishing everyone happy energy for the last weeks of summer. 

Moonflwr912

Well I got my official notice of termination today. Seems I have been out of work too long. Used my FML, used up my vacation, used up discresionary leave. I am not ready to return yet, cause I can't be on my feet that long, I am recovering from.my te replacement. Oh well, I knew it was coming, but it just hit me I qm once again unemployed. Also doesbthat mean they don't have to pay my longterm disability? that sucks. I can't change it, so will just have deal with it.

CookieMonster

Thanks Goldie - the surgery is more than a lumpie but less than a MX - about a week to recover. They cut a circle around the areola & nipple, then cut from that a line down underneath the breast. I suspect he took out a wedge of skin from that vertical cut, took out some of the tissue, cut the areola piece smaller (he said my areola was bigger than most so I okd reducing it's size too). Then pull the two sides of the vertical cut together and put the smaller circle of skin nipple areola back to fill the hole. Does that make sense, it's hard to describe, but I can picture it all in my head. If you take a circle of fabric then cut out a circle from the middle of it leaving a ring, then cut out a wedge from the wing, pull the two ends of the ring together, the cut out circle area gets smaller, so cut some off of the cut out circle and put it back in - I think that's basically what he did, but on a 3D shape instead of 2D, same idea though.

Moonflower - sorry you're unemployed. I'd check to see if them terminating you is legal - it may be in some states and depending on the size of the company, but it might not be, definitely worth checking.

Goldie, I'm sorry your job doesn't treat you better - to talk out of both sides of the mouth like that must be infuriating. HUGS!

QuinnCat

Goldlining - in the field?  In safety shoes?  Now I'm wondering, what your discipline is...archeology, botany, soil science......

Cookie - the incision you describe sounds like an Anchor.  They used these on my MX and PMX, but no nipple-sparing for me. 

 Moonflwr - I think it is illegal to lay someone off for an illness, but I know it is done and how perfect is it to do it to someone that doesn't have the fight left in them.

Blessings - I sent you a PM. 

Are we all on hormone blockers???? 

Moonflwr912

I haven't started yet. I am supposed to start on Monday.

CookieMonster

Kam - not an anchor, it doesn't have the curved part of the anchor, more like a keyhole, circle up top and then a vertical line down from there.

I'm on tamoxifen, my BC was just a little bit ER+ and a lot PR+

Blessings2011

Kam - I've managed to dodge my MO and the Anastrozole until September!!!  

(Her recommendation, due to the Optifast program I was on. Didn't want to mix up any possible side effects....)

QuinnCat

Well, here is the good news....6 days into Aromasin and what I mistaked as a possible SE, insomnia, was really the result of switching from one 20 oz drive thru Americano to 5 cups of Mr. Coffee cheap coffee (in attempt to save money...now I think I've just justified my wanna New Espresso machine!).  Apparently, by the Starbucks nutrition website, I was gettting 3 times morcaffeine from those 5 cups of regular coffee than the 20 oz daily Americano.  Problem solved...I slept 8 hours last night!!  [I started Mr. Coffee the same day I started the Aromasin.]

On the other hand, menopause was extremely easy for me.  Never a hot flash.  In fact, if my periods hadn't stopped the day Edward Kennedy died (causing me to remember that fact), I'd still think I was having them, except for the convenience factor!!  

Today I went on my typical "keep up the strength during chemo walks" and all of a sudden I felt like normal me.  On the second hill, I hadn't even realized we did the first hill already (usually I would just dread the thought of either hill during chemo).  We also shaved off 10 minutes of our typical 45 minute walk.  It's so nice to feel normal again (though neuropathy is still a bugger).

Yes, confusing Anchor with Keyhole.  How does it look around the keyhole part???

CookieMonster

Kam - I'm so amused by the caffeine, glad it was an easy solution. Keep up the walking!! (I need to get back to the exercise, but I just hate the heat). The keyhole part isn't round, but PS says that we can do some fine tuning without general anesthesia, so when we do nipple we can do that as well. The keyhole scar is on the edge of the areola so it should blend nicely.

Blessings - good luck on Wednesday! I hope it all goes smoothly and that you love your new squishies.

I hope you all have a great weekend - It's a busy one for me, tonight friend in from DC so dinner and a small gathering, tomorrow arborist in the morning, then b-day brunch with my parents (I'm becoming the answer to life, the universe, and everything), then friends at our place in the afternoon to hang out and play games, then another friends birthday dinner, on Sunday we have a BBQ in the afternoon and then birthday/anniversary dinner with the in-laws - their anniversary, my b-day. I'm going to be exhausted by the time Monday rolls around and I have to go back to work!! But fun will be had!

goldlining

Maybe the keyhole makes more of a lift than the anchor? I had the full anchor-shape incisions on a reduction way back in 1976. It was a spectacular job. Shame about later... But I guess I got a good 35 years out of them :-)

I am free of safety shoes today! Back in the air cast and much better but still a long day on the feet. No archeology, plants or soils are (intentionally) involved. Lots of roller coasters and whatnot.

Moonflwr, that totally sucks. Grr.

Kam, loved the coffee story. Have to remember that the regular life factors are still there doing their thing.

Ginger48

I have been taking letrozole for almost 8 months. I have some hot flashes which are pretty manageable and some joint/muscle pain that gets better when I exercise consistently.

Bogie

Moon, so sorry on the job news. Yes it will affect your LTD unfortunately, however you are eligible for unemployment so apply ASAP.



I have been MIA for a bit, my Mother just passed away and so crazy around here. Only medical update is deciding if I want to have DIEP surgery sine both TE failed.



Hope all is well hugs to dec sisters...

QuinnCat

{{{Bogie}}} sorry to hear about your mother. I still miss my mother and it has been 43 years....it's so hard.  xxox

Ginger48

Bogie- sorry to hear about your mom. Sending hugs your way!

Blessings2011

Oh, Bogie, I'm so sorry to hear about your mom! Big hugs to you!!!