Needing some positive thoughts!

SandraB

Hi everyone,

I am new here, so not sure of all the lingo yet. I have been diagnosed with a triple negative cancer and there is node involvement.  My surgeon wants to do chemo first, followed by surgery. I guess rad after that?

Right now I just feel frightened and anxious and terrified I won't be here to see my 3 kids (aged 2, 5 7) grow up. I know I am being a sook! 

I guess I am hoping some of you beautiful ladies out there can help put my mind at ease, a little

Blessings,

Sandra

RJ70

I know it hard at first, but remenber to take one day at time, and to stay positive.  The ladies on here are great if you have any questions. I will be praying for you.

msphil

hello sweetie, take a deep breath and you came to the right place we know your feelings we have been where you are today but you will see it will get better when you know what is in store and we will be here for you, so come back when you need to. God Bless msphil

SandraB

Thanks guys. It is so good to be able to talk here.. as supportive as my family and friends are, I need to be able to talk to, and get advice from, women who are going through it too. I expect to feel the full gamut of emotions over the coming months..
(hugs) 

profbee

Hi, Sandra.  I'm sorry you're here.  I have a different diagnosis, but I have a little boy (5), and thoughts of his future without me plagued me too.  You're in an insane time in your life right now.  You've just heard the worst thing you've probably ever heard.  So, it's normal to be a little nuts.    

My gynecologist gave me a prescription for some anti-anxiety meds when I was diagnosed.  I never took stuff like that, but as she said, "Now is the time.  You'll need to make a lot of decisions (treatment options leave room for your input and so you need a clear head), and you need to sleep to make them."  So, don't be shy.  Ask your doc for something to ease the anxiety if you think it will help.  It surely helped me.  Sometimes still does.  

Something else that comforted me--this may not be entirely PC, but we have a popular cancer.  They are doing SO much.  So, remember that lots of pink ribbon waving people are raising money to beat what you have.  So, there are tons of treatments and things they can do these days.  

It's one foot in front of the other for a while now.  Try not to get too far ahead of yourself and just deal with what you know.  

Thinking of you tonight. 

bak94

(((((Hugs))))))) Sorry you had to joing us, but you will find great support here. I am also doing neo adjuvent chemo and am getting close to be done. The good thing about doing chemo first is they can monitor to see how well the chemo is working and many triple negative gals have a great response to chemo. I just had a breast and chest mri to check on mine, find out results tomorrow but a ct that I just had showed my positive nodes are resolved and no tumor seen in the breast. I am hoping the mri says the same thing! Hang in there! It is a difficult time while deciding and waiting for treatment to start and the nerves tend to ease up a bit once treatment starts.

SandraB

Thank you ladies,

Can't believe how quick you are to reach out and offer me support. I feel like such a big sook compared to you! But yes, I am sure once we start treatment and I see the beast shrinking and dying I will feel a whole lot better emotionally and psychologically. 

I have anti anxiety meds and boy, are they getting a work out this week. I spoke to my psych on the phone and he told me to take what I need right now because it is important to keep anxiety levels under control. Hopefully today, after I meet with the doc and talk with an oncologist I will feel a little more at ease.  

Hugs to you all.  

numbie

Hi all - I too am triple neg and had the chemo first, surgery then radiation.  Today was my last radiation treatment!  I was and still am very emotional about it. the chemo shrunk my tumor almost completely.  Then surgery went very well - all drs were very excited to see the final pathology report.  Cancer only went into 1 node - they took 12 out.  I also had a double mastectomy - but only had to have a single.  My choice.

I can just say that everything will pass.  It's hard to give hopeful thoughts to everyone - as I have anxiety at the moment with "separation anxiety".  I don't see my oncologist again until December - it just seems too far away.

God bless to everyone.  And one thing I can say is that I was never a pill popper in my life (vitamins were a stretch for me) - but I was told by my first chemo nurse - "you'll be a pill popper for the next year!" and I was...  that's how I got through my treatments.  You have to do what you have to do.   

Shirlann

I am a tri-neg and 13 years post treatment.  Remember, our ace in the hole, if you get to two years, tri-negs RARELY recur.

Gentle hugs, Shirlann 

yellowdoglady

Thanks for stopping by Shirlann!

Like most of us triple negs, I want to live happily ever after.  At three years out, that is more a plan than a wish, but nothing is guaranteed just yet.  As you said, I have been told that at some point, we are better off than the positive folks because if we get far enough out from the dx, we can begin to believe that the beast is dead and will not come back.  If it could, we would see it by now, is my thought.  I was told that at a year and a half out, half of all of us who could see a recurrance already have.  The chances of a recurrence start dropping right then, and by three years, the drop is straight down.