WHAT ARE WE REALLY HERE FOR

onepostonly

I am a long standing member but choose to not use my online name in this post as I don't want to get caught in the fray of things. I'm not a chicken it's just that I don't need anymore stress in my life. I always enjoyed coming here when I was 1st diagnosed and I still like to visit with old friends I made here.

ONE QUESTION: WHY ARE YOU REALLY HERE? Is it to gain knowledge, provide help, receive help, comfort others, share a laugh, a recipe, enjoy conversations that aren't all about cancer. I'm sure that is why the vast majority are here.

One Observation: # of Views for certain Topics/Posters. Curiousity is human nature. Fair enough but in the meantime there are posts where people are asking for help, answers, guidance and yet these posts get relatively few views/replies

As an example:

topic on removing ovaries posted 12 hours ago/155 views-Tough decision. Poster likely looking for help from experienced members

topic; waiting for core biopsy 4 days ago/ 223 views-Newbie likely scared and worried

topic; Tamoxifen wards off return of BC for 10 years posted July 29/ 229 views-Sounds like great news but didn't get much interest  

TOPIC; FACT CHECK FLAG posted 7 hours ago 532 views-Wow that's a high number. Why so much attention to this topic? Why did it get into namecalling/accusations/threats to report? Is it because of who posted or what was posted. Be honest with yourselves!

Not to pick on that topic as there are many topics that get started here that quickly turn disrespectful, name calling etc. It's just so unneccesary. And I know, I don't have to read them but when a new topic pops up, you don't know what it's about until you read it. Then it just gets so disheartening to see grown women be so darn mean to each other. We're never all going to agree, but be respectful, voice your opinion and move on before it gets ugly. 

Ladies, whether you realize it or not your actions truly are upsetting for other members and I personally know of women that have left BC.ORG because it's so in your face everday when you log on. 

So ask yourselves; What are you really here for? 

Be kind and have a good day. 

                       

onepostonly

PS: That will be my only post on this topic.

Moderators

Thank you onepostonly for your personal, and very accurate, summary. We too hope that more attention (including from us) can be given to such posters as you quoted in your post. We hear you loud and clear, and agree.

Thank you, The Mods

suzieq60

I try to help answer questions and have been doing just that all along. I have received warm thanks from one girl recently which was lovely. I also like to post on friendship threads and my old chemo thread and I don't see that is a problem.

Sue

thats-life-

i saw this post in active topics, hence my response. ( i actually thought it was a philosophical question about life) ..

coincidentally, today i have also read the topics you mentioned..the removal of ovary thread, as i have a category one ooph scheduled, and dont know what to do...the core biopsy post because i remembered how scary my biopsies were, but i do not feel in a position to talk to newbies yet, unless they are stage IV newbies...and the good news about tamoxifen... i read that thread yesterday.

i saw the flag idea topic in active topics too.,..i only posted in one, because i only had an opinion on that topic. i have posted support messages to a number of stage IV women today.

your point may be valid, but i would think only to a very small number of members.

EachDay

What a wonderful one post...so well said.  It is because of the negativity and nasty comments, name calling, vile PMs going around that I left here...it simply became too much.  Hopefully things will continue to change for the better especially for those newly diagnosed who come here in fear, looking for a helping hand to guide them along.