Would a pet dog help?

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out03doors
out03doors Member Posts: 36
edited June 2014 in Middle Age 40-60(ish) Years Old With Breast Cancer

Hello,

I'm approaching the one-year anniversary of finding the lump... 4/22.  Done with chemo/rads.  I looked forward to showing the cancer I triumphed, by planning something fun. But, today feel so down and maybe fear of recurrence, survival guilt, fatigue, who knows? Oh, will see my oncologist tomorrow and  part of me wants to stay away from doctors for a long time! Feel fortunate that my medical team is wonderful and kind. 

Um, rambling here...often I feel guilty when fatigue is too much. Stayed home from work today, which I've not needed to do since chemo. So, to problem-solve (smile) was thinking of getting a pet dog, not puppy, but not sure we could handle the care. My DH is still cooking.

Wish my feistiness would come back!! 

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  • thefuzzylemon
    thefuzzylemon Member Posts: 2,630
    edited March 2011

    I looooooove my puppy!!  Ok, he's not a puppy anymore ... but, let me tell you, that little guy is with me every step of the way!!  And, when I'm feeling better, he knows it!   He literally lays by me all day if I need it.  He eats when I eat.  He is such a blessing to me every single day.  And he is so understanding ... I might sound a little koo koo nuts here but he is strength to me.  He even gets protective if someone comes by me when I'm laying down ... like, "What do you want.  Just run it by me first ... " 

    If you want my vote ... get a dog.  Make the right choice for you and enjoy!

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  • AnewBeginning
    AnewBeginning Member Posts: 536
    edited March 2011

    Hi out3doors

    My little furball is what helps me get through each day as he himself also has cancer.  He was dx in October and the Oncologist told me he would not make it past 2 months.  I decided to go see a Chinese Herbalist who also believes in conventional medicine and my lil boy has been on Chinese herbs for the past 6 months and is doing well.  I must say he is braver than I because I am having such a hard time dealing with this monster disease.  When I look at him he just reminds me of how how important life is.  My vote is to get a dog, they are your best friend and you can train them to your schedule.  Let us know what you decide.

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  • out03doors
    out03doors Member Posts: 36
    edited March 2011

    LOL that your dog wants people to run it by him first.  Thank you!

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  • thefuzzylemon
    thefuzzylemon Member Posts: 2,630
    edited March 2011

    He is such a character!!  He gets this little scrunchy face (that's what we call it) ... he goes night night the same time I do ... walks me every where I need to go ... right now he is laying at my feet while I look through the boards (just like we do every morning). 

    If you get a little furball, you gotta post a picture so we can see it!! 

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  • AnewBeginning
    AnewBeginning Member Posts: 536
    edited March 2011

    thefuzzylemon

    Same here with my lil guy.......doesnt follow me around much these days as he hasnt got the energy he once had but he is my life and sleeps in the hollow of my knees at night.  I dont know what I'll do when he is no longer here with me.  Every day  with him is a blessing!

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  • bckicker
    bckicker Member Posts: 39
    edited March 2011

    You should not feel guilty about the fatigue I have been off chemo for almost 2 yrs and there still are days I dont want to get out of bed . your body has went through alot and it will take time to get your fiesty back just give it time and rest when u feel tired that will be the best.My dog was a big help getting me through my sad slumps.He would climb up beside me and just let me lay on him and pet him made me relax alot.If you are worried about the caring for one maybe a small companion dog such as a chihuahua or yorkie? I wish you the best of luck and if you decide for a dog hope you enjoy him/her:)

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  • thefuzzylemon
    thefuzzylemon Member Posts: 2,630
    edited March 2011

    Oh gosh ... don't think about that aweful day ... we had to put our baby down last April and it was just horrible!!  But, when my DH healed a bit, he picked out this little guy from the humane society ... DH had him for 24 hours before I got home and that was that ... we connected instantly!  He sleeps on my pillow with me ... rides like a champ in the car ... knows all the tricks!  DH didn't know what he did for me at the time (it was suppose to be a pooch for him) but now ... knows what a gift that little guy really has been ...

    Oh I'm so glad I got to chat about him ... thank you for this post!!

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  • out03doors
    out03doors Member Posts: 36
    edited March 2011

    aNewbeginning: Glad to hear your loving dog is responding well to the Chinese herbs!

    bckicker: Thanks for the reminder to rest when I need to.

     thefuzzylmon: Glad you enjoy this post!

    All of you made me smile!  

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  • Christine5
    Christine5 Member Posts: 78
    edited May 2011

    Just got a beautiful two year old long haired German Shepard, she is amazing therapy for me and is my walking buddy.

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  • Christine5
    Christine5 Member Posts: 78
    edited May 2011

    Just got a beautiful two year old long haired German Shepard, she is amazing therapy for me and is my walking buddy. I am hoping she will help me gain some stamina back.

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  • YamahaMama
    YamahaMama Member Posts: 221
    edited May 2011

    My dad passed away from bladder cancer 16 years ago, but while he was undergoing treatment, he mentioned he wanted to get a teacup poodle...he'd always wanted one.  We weren't able to find a teacup, but did get him a tiny toy for an early Christmas present that year (1994).  Misty was his constant companion, and I swear he loved her more than his kids!  LOL  Anyway, one time, when he was in the hospital, and he was missing her SO badly, I went to his house and got her, but couldn't figure out how to smuggle her in.  Later that same day, one of the nurses came in to his room, and I jokingly said, "Ignore the dog under the bed."  She thought I was serious, but then mentioned it was alright with the hospital if I brought her, as long as she didn't bother other patients.  I immediately went and got her, again, and it was so much fun to watch both of them and the joy they brought each other.  During my dad's last days, the dog was, as usual, on the bed with him, and when the hospice nurses would come in, she would also have to check them out, then she'd move out of the way to let them do what they needed to do.  At the exact moment he passed, she was in another room of the house, but she wailed like I have never heard an animal wail in my life, and will never forget it.  She ended up living with my DH and I, and I cried for days and days when she passed...  My replacement for her has been a Godsend to me during my treatment, now... 

    So, I vote for the dog!!!! 

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  • kittymama
    kittymama Member Posts: 139
    edited May 2011

    I vote for the dog too! And as you can tell by my username I'm a kitty lover. Pets are the best medicine.

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  • bak94
    bak94 Member Posts: 1,846
    edited May 2011

    Did you get a dog? YES! A dog will help! You will be amazed. do it do it do it! If you haven't already done it!

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  • 37antiques
    37antiques Member Posts: 643
    edited May 2011
    Dogs are wonderful!  My shepherd sleeps on my feet to keep them warm, my mix loves to snuggle.  Puppies can be work to train, but there are lots of already housebroken furry joys at any shelter.  Something with no too much energy and muscle if you feel tired, you don't want a pet to take you for a walk!  The nice thing about a dog?  You can tell them anything and they still love you, they're always there when you need them, and they are awesome to snuggle with Wink
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  • YamahaMama
    YamahaMama Member Posts: 221
    edited May 2011

    Joycek, I'm sorry about your losing Cally...my dogs are my children, every bit as much as the child I gave birth to/married into.  I can attest to the fact my four-legged daughter has never put me through anywhere NEAR the grief the other five two-legged ones have!  LOL  That is so sweet that your dad was able to keep Cally during the day while you worked...I have no doubt she was a huge impact on his life, also!  (((hugs)))

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  • mrsnjband
    mrsnjband Member Posts: 1,409
    edited May 2011

    We just got a new puppy about 2 months ago.  She is so much fun to have around.  She is so funny & cheers me up!! I vote for a puppy! NJ

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  • YamahaMama
    YamahaMama Member Posts: 221
    edited May 2011

    @Joycek - After we lost my dad's poodle, my husband was not ready to replace her...  He had grown up on a farm, and dogs stayed outside.  If they got to come in the house due to severe weather, they were sent to the basement.  Shortly after we were married, I asked him if Misty could come stay with us for a "weekend," because I thought my brother would change his mind and want to keep her.  He didn't want her back, so she ended up with us as her forever family in 2001.  He didn't realize when he agreed to that first weekend that she would have to sleep in the bed with us, under the covers!  Poor guy...  Didn't take long, though, and she had him completely wrapped around her paw, and she was, once again, a "daddy's girl."  Unfortunately, she passed a couple days after Christmas in 2004, and my daughter was leaving in January to go to college 400 miles away.  I was completely lost without the two of them, and just couldn't stand not having Misty there to greet me when I came home everyday.  He finally caved, and we got our next poodle in February.  They have some similar traits, and some not so similar traits, but I love the new one, Pandy, every bit as much as I loved Misty, and I still think about her every day.  They just have a way of working their ways into our hearts!  You are absolutely right about them giving unconditional love and never asking anything in return... 

    I don't regret getting a new puppy so soon, but I know my husband worries about having to go through that grief again at some point.  He was as heartbroken over losing her as I was... 

    @Norma June - Puppies are a LOT of work, but SO worth it!  The therapy is incredible! 

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  • AmyIsStrong
    AmyIsStrong Member Posts: 1,755
    edited May 2011

    Also you can consider a rescue, if a puppy is too much.  After my beloved Golden was gone, the house felt so empty but the thought of going through the puppy stuff all over again felt too overwhelming. We wanted something a bit smaller and settled on a cocker. Got our little girl at a local rescue at 6 years old and she has been wonderful the past 4 years. The perfect companion. She was a comfort when i went through all the bc stuff two years ago for sure.

    I know that when her time comes to leave us, we will get another one. There are so many unwanted dogs out there that need a good home and they have so much love to give.

    I vote for the dog! (altho not necessarily a puppy)

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  • out03doors
    out03doors Member Posts: 36
    edited June 2011

    We did have a dog years ago and until then I never understood why people loved their dog.  But after getting one, I so understood!  I'm just not ready to make the comittment now. If we did get one it would be from the shelter. 

     With the laundry/chores, work, and need for rest I can't even imagine taking the responsibility for a dog. Then again, some days I yearn to cuddle with a pet dog. Guess you hear my ambivalence (smile).  So for now, it's a "no," but who knows ... Smile

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  • NatureGrrl
    NatureGrrl Member Posts: 1,367
    edited June 2011

    out03, your energy will return.  I was still taking lots of naps several months after treatment ended but I gradually kept seeing myself move up "levels" of energy, which was encouraging.  I was about a year out when I started to really feel like my old self.  Everyone is different but I've been told that's very normal progression.  So be gentle with yourself, and get your dog when you're ready.  You'll know when it's right.  And the right one will be waiting for you!  

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  • pupfoster1
    pupfoster1 Member Posts: 1,484
    edited June 2011

    Oh my gosh, just caught this in the active threads! 


    By all means get a dog, but DO YOUR RESEARCH first!  They are A LOT of work, but SOOO rewarding.  I can't imagine my life w/out one.  Molly our black lab has been there through my whole journey and never fails to give me a big wet kiss when I'm feeling down. 

    All that said remember it's a lifetime commitment and you can't just drop everything and travel w/out thinking about the pup first, as well as the monetary expense over it's lifetime.

    And PLEASE go the rescue route (which it sounds as though you are already considering)!  There are OODLES of WONDERFUL dogs out there that could be put down if they aren't rescued.

    Let us know what you decide!

    Sharon

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  • mrsnjband
    mrsnjband Member Posts: 1,409
    edited June 2011

    We love our new puppy!  She is almost potty trained & we started "puppy" classes so we can be a better at teaching her good habits.  We won't ever be able to over-ride her breading but that's what makes her so special. I agree with sharon, do your research & make sure you know what you are gettin into!  

    Good luck! NJ 

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  • justagirl
    justagirl Member Posts: 730
    edited June 2011

    My girl, Jaki, is my best friend. She is 5 now and I rescued her from the RSPCA when she was 6 weeks old and she has never voluntarily left my side since. The worst part of my hospital stays was not having her to cuddle up to. Supposedly border collies are very active and hyper and Jaki can be that way but since in this past year I have spent so much time laying on the couch or bed, well, she just snuggles up beside me.  She listens to me when I am sad, licks me when I cry and always understands me.  She asks for nothing but to be with me.

    At this time a puppy may be too much, with the toilet training and chewing stage, to deal with and recover from cancer, but to rescue a dog already house trained could just be what you need.  My girlfriend rescued a 8 year old lab, already house trained, and I swear that dog appreciates my friend loving her. 

    Keep in mind maybe to get a dog that does not require a large space, will fit with your lifestyle indoors, and will not require vigourous exercise.

    Also, a dog can motivate you when you need some, to go for a bit of a walk outside as fresh air and the sun are always a good fix-all.  They don't need  anything but love and attention.....

    Cats are good for affection too, and don't require the attention and a litter box will care for the basics.  They are independent but are a good cuddle.

    Speaking of potty training.  If getting outside to have your dog do it's business, small dogs can be trained to go on special mats designed for in the home and then you just throw the top layer away!  We have a dog door, so I never have to worry about taking Jaki out.

    I would truly say to avoid an expensive bred dog, as they can have many medical issues due to inbreeding and weak genes, and you surely don't need that in your life!

    Finding the right dog might take weekly trip to the local RSPCA but it could be a project for you.

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  • Blinx
    Blinx Member Posts: 280
    edited June 2011

    After being a life-long cat person, I adopted my first dog almost 2 years ago -- a 1 yr old Cairn terrier mix. Already house trained, past his chewing phase, and SUCH a wonderful companion. We bonded for life on the ride home! He makes me laugh just by looking at me!

    I enjoyed him so much, that the next year I adopted another dog, as a buddy for the first guy. But my luck ran out -- 2 weeks later, he tore his ACL, went through $$ surgery, long recovery, many behavioral problems. He's finally starting to come out of his shell (and he's on Prozac -- maybe that's helping).

    Still, I don't regret it. It's very rewarding with both of them, and they (mostly) get along with my cats.

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  • out03doors
    out03doors Member Posts: 36
    edited June 2011

    Hope he continues to come back to himself !  

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  • YamahaMama
    YamahaMama Member Posts: 221
    edited June 2011

    I had to do a four-day stint in the hospital last week due to pneumonia...  During my "admission," I was telling the nurse about being able to take my dad's dog to see him in the hospital 16 years ago, when he was on the oncology floor.  Much to my surprise, the nurse told me they still allow it, but there are hoops you have to go through now to make it happen.  I asked, but the weekend charge nurse turned me down.  Had I had to stay any longer, though, I would have asked again, and my baby would have been snuggling with me in the hospital! 

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  • out03doors
    out03doors Member Posts: 36
    edited June 2011

    YamahaMama, it's good you're better. So, hospitals recognize the healing power of pets!

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  • dreaming
    dreaming Member Posts: 473
    edited June 2011

    I had 2 dogs and 2 cats that help me during my treatment, that was in 1993, due to age all are gone now, but I have a new buddy that is really my 4 legged grandson, he is helping me now with basal cell carcinoma that caused to have a huge scar on my face.

    Pets are fantastic, they give love and ask very little in return.

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  • Christine5
    Christine5 Member Posts: 78
    edited June 2011

    My partner snuck our little dog into the hospital at the suggestion of our nurse. It was great to spend time with him.

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  • YamahaMama
    YamahaMama Member Posts: 221
    edited June 2011

    Out03doors, I was actually very surprised the hospital allowed it 16 years ago, but absolutely FLABBERGASTED they still allow it!  I'm sure it depends on the hospital, and the "condition" of the patient.  I wasn't expected to not get out of there, so I'm sure that had something to do with my getting turned down.  That, and maybe the fact the admitting doctor expected I would only be there a day or two, rather than four.  Who knows?  My baby was very happy to see me when I got home, though, as usual! 

    Christine5, I'm so proud of that nurse for suggesting that!  There are lots of studies out there that have shown the healing power of pets.  Glad to know there are people and places that accept that fact! 

    And, Out03doors, have your waivered at all on your decision to get a new dog?????  LOL

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