My sister in law who is also my best friend has breast cancer

eyes75

My sister in law was diagnosed with breast cancer then we descovered it had spread to her lungs, liver and bones.  She started chemo 2 weeks ago. I have done a fair bit of research on this and as of yet no dr has told her or our family the prognosis of this aand i am becoming so frustrated about this as i feel that she has a right to know. Has anyone experienced this where the cancer patient has not actually been told everything????

Alpal

Has someone been with her every time she's talked to the doctor? The reason I say this is because many of us spare our relatives and friends the reality of our diagnosis. And quite frankly I'd fire any doctor who shared my prognosis with my family unless I had given him permission to do so. Some patients make it clear to their docs that they don't want to know the stats. Do you know if she has even asked her doctor? Some doctors don't give a prognosis unless asked. Others refuse to give a time line because stats are really not reliable. Would it make it better to hear that according to the stats she only has 18-24 months to live? Or that only only 20% of Stage IV patients live for 5 years after diagnosis? That info is readilly available on Google. Stage IV is increasingly treated as a chronic condition, albeit eventually terminal. Come over to the Stage IV board and meet many women who have made a mockery of the stats. Better yet, encourage your SIL to come to the Stage IV forum.