February 2011 chemo pals

SpecialK

emily and fuzzylemon - LisaGH, dragonfly and I will be here too - we are all TCHx6 I believe so we will be here until end of May.

thefuzzylemon

  Is anyone still working or going back?  I may be trying it this Friday ... just wondering about restrictions you may have had ...

DivineMrsM

I'm still working. My job is part-time, 5 1/4 hours a day, Monday thru Friday at an elementary school. I'm a classroom aide in special-needs preschool.  There's a teacher, another aide and me for about 9 students of varying issues.  I also help out during the lunch and recess times with the typical 3 and 4 year old preschoolers, about 50 of those kids.  There are two aides and two teachers with that group. 

The job is 4 minutes from my house. I like the job and feel I offer some special qualities and insights that the students I work with really benefit from.

"But"....I am not going to mess around with my health.  My chemo is scheduled on a Wed., so I take that day, plus Thurs. and Fri off.  The first time, with a holiday and school cancellation due to snow, I also got the following Mon. and Tue. off.  My next chemo is this Wed.  and I will again take off Thurs and Fri.  If need be, I will take days off the following week.

I also took yesterday (Friday) off because I was just simply worn out and exhausted.  I have no work-related doctor restrictions.  I wash my hands a lot during school.  You know those preschoolers are notorious for all their little colds and fevers and other assorted illnesses the parents send them to school with.  So far, I've been around them and not gotten sick. But if I run into some kind of problem there, I will take off work.

I am fortunate that my DH has a good job, so I don't have financial concerns. My onc recommends her patients continue to work, but also says she would write an excuse to take off for disability if I felt it necessary. I do like my job, tho, and want to work when I can.  And I'll get summer off, and am looking forward to that.

countingmyblessings

EMILY: My last chemo #6 will be May 31 and then I too will be doing radiation after that, with an exchange surgery somewhere in between. Looks like there will be quite a few of us hanging around till May/June...

FUZZYLEMON: I had had grand plans of working through my chemo treatments, but my oncologist didn't give me the okay to work since I teach. First graders' fingers go into any and all orifices, so he did not think it was a good idea. 

WinnieThePooh

I am in the midst of chemo. (AC + Taxol).  I am getting ready for my final AC this Monday and I've been having a tough time since the third.  The side effects improved as I went along; however, the fatigue has worsened.  I feel "flat" and disinterested in the things that usually draw me out of myself.  My usual "perky" personality seems to have taken a vacation as well!  I was wondering if anyone else experienced this.  I keep asking my DH if I will EVER feel like myself again...  

thefuzzylemon

I've been told I shoudn't go back for at least 6 months ... after mid April I wouldn't have the choice at all ...

I have a Training and Development position ... I drive the length of Wisconsin with many over nights ... hundreds of people ... 60-70 hour weeks ... and I work for a drug store *illnesses abound).  I carry the benefits so I know what I have to do ... but the driving and overnights will hopefully be on pause until after rads ...

DivineMrsM

I should also add that I have not had surgery to remove the tumor yet, it will be after chemo and that will take till summer at which time I will be off work for vacation.  I don't know how I'd manage working if I'd first had surgery and then follow up with chemo, sounds grueling to me.

thefuzzylemon

Ok...here's another...I seem to have gained 6 pounds overnight...Steroids? Treament? Should I start to worry?

SharonJ1234

Glad everyone is coping okay.  My heart and thoughts are with you all

ruffy

If I stay on course, I will be doing chemo until end of May. Then a break, then sx followed by rad. My surgeon advised me to take 8 months all ti myself, no work , just working on my self and healing.that's probably why I'm going a bit stir crazy cause im so used to my schedule. I work for a vascular surgeon though and am unable medically to be in that environment day to day so I'm just going to have to use this time to realign my life. Enjoy my surroundings and learn to slow down. Oh and somehow learn to tolerate chemo:( Winnie, from what I hear you will feel like yourself again, let's cross our everything that taxol will be even one tenth easier, hope you feel better soon- hang in there , you're almost done

WinnieThePooh

Ruffolo1- thanks for the reassurance!  I agree with you- I am going to cross my everything that Taxol is a bit kinder than the AC!!!

SpecialK

Hello,

fuzzylemon - you may be retaining fluid, what is your regimen?  With a sudden weight gain you probably should notify you onc.  Do you have any swelling?  Maybe just eat some asparagus...

I am not working - too much surgery in a row.  I also work in a biohazardous (Blood Bank) environment in a hospital with too much exposure to germs.  My job is very strenuous with often no lunch/break, etc.  There is absolutely no way I could have continued to work through chemo after coming off the surgeries.  I might have possibly been able to if I had just had the BMX and stopped there.  Unfortunately the job doesn't lend itself to days off here and there.  We are staffed 24 hours a day/365 days a year.

Fortunately I paid for short term disab benefits and the company pays for long term disab benefits at 60% of pay.  I don't know how long I can continue on long term - they are evaluating on 3/25.  As long as it is not causing overtime to cover my hours I think they will continue me.

thefuzzylemon

LOL ... why didn't I think about the asparagus!!  Always brings me to a happy place (puff puff).

I don't seem to be swelling but I will bring it up ... I have to think it's the steroids ... I guess they are pretty intense.  I know this sounds crazy but I really don't know what I'm on exacty.  It's the most aggressive - red devil and something something ... then its TAXOL for a while ... it's kinda a blur.  I cry when I sit in the chair now ... then I get my girl girl panties back on ... eat a bunch of popsciles and go home! 

Thanks for all the help!! As always!

Hugs and a smile!

SpecialK

fuzzylemon - if its red it is Adriamycin - or the E substitute because of the shortage.  I know the steroids will cause weight gain but that is pretty sudden so def tell your onc and keep track if it goes up or down suddenly. 

Makes me sad to think of you crying in your chair - can you bring a puppy, maybe?  One can't cry with a cute puppy in their lap.  I wish I could drive up and sit with you.  I have to go on Thurs. - trying not to freak out.  Do you go weekly?  I go every 3 weeks, just long enough in between to feel normal, right?

Chin up! (as my Mom used to say!)

thefuzzylemon

I had such a rough first go-round with the meds ... I just lost it!  I would looooove to bring my puppy!  He's been by my side the whole time!  He even goes into "protect-o-dg" mode when someone comes near me ... he's adorable. 

I go every two weeks - yep, it's red for sure ... I'lll call them on Monday if it's still outta whack.  Great advice - thanks a bunch. 

I wish I had you there with me!!  We'd probably laugh and giggle through the whole thing!  Your sense of humor is awesome!! 

This time was a whole lot better ... I was bed ridden for 6 days last time ... it's only 24 hours after round two and I ate, took a bath and all, and spent time on the threads!  Not bad ... considering!

Every three weeks. eh?  Are you on the Red Stuff?

SpecialK

No, I get Taxotere, Carboplatin and Herceptin.  Its not very nice.  I have only had one tx so far and was fine for the first two days, then down and out for five days.  Dry heaves, diarrhea, bad headache, ears ringing, fatigue, mouth sores, nosebleeds, you name it.  Then woke up at the one week point and felt like a new person. I have 5 more tx so wont be done until end of May - then Herceptin for a year through the port.  I am glad you are doing better this round - I have read in a couple of places that subsequent tx are somehow easier physically (maybe not emotionally!) until you get closer to being done and then it is cumulative fatigue that becomes a problem.  We will all have to be careful to rest more as we go along.

You need to get your puppy a "therapy dog" vest and bring him with you!  They are covered under the Americans With Disabilities Act - nobody can ask you why he is with you! 

thefuzzylemon

WHOA!!  You really had a rough round!!  I'm really hoping it goes waaaaay better for ya!

Can I really have him as a therepy dog??? Am I disabled??  I hope that isn't the dumbest questions but ... I'd love to have him with me ...

EmilyInOntario

Fuzzy...I'm on the "red stuff" too. Just curious..how many syringes full of stuff do you get? I get 5. For some reason watching that stuff being given bothers me ..don't know why. The rest is fine.

Special K...My mom has been saying "chin up" to me through this whole thing ( she's almost 80)...I think she just doesn't know what else to say, bless her heart.

Fuzzy..do you take someone with you when you go for chemo? I find that really helps.

A dog would be such a comfort right now. I often think of mine and wish she were here now. Ironically, she had cancer but lived to be a 126 in doggie years. I have actually considered getting a puppy again. What a wonderful friend a dog is !

thefuzzylemon

Hey there Em -  I get two (I think ... that's all I've seen anyway) and it really is troubling ... to think what kind of aweful toxin that is but it tames the demon ... gotta push on!

I have my husband and my daughter for a bit.  I really don't want them to see me cry - I'm (was) a tough little cookie and they are going through so much themselves ... I just need that few minutes...puppy wouldn't mind at all ... he'd lick em all off and lay his little head on my lap

Yes ... get that puppy!!!  There's nothing like it really ... as you know

Salma1971

WinniethePooh--- I think it's really normal... It happened to me after my 1st treatment!!! And I keep thinking to myself, this isn't me... ! I think we need to try to ease back into our old selves again... Yesterday was a brisk Spring day over here in Amman/Jordan and I took a nice walk... Try to do that when you feel up to it... it will help you a lot... Good luck Ladies...

Salma1971

Special K...... You really have an amazing and brave sense of humor... I feel like a LAMO here.. I am on 4xA/C and I have days when I feel I lost my spirit...! Fuzzylemon-- You know what, if the doctor says there is nothing to worry about medical regarding the weight gain, I would say, forget it... enjoy it... and one day soon.. all this will be behind you and you will get back on track again--

SpecialK

Emily - I think the chin up thing is my Mom's British/Canadian coming out.  She was very stiff upper lip.  I wish she was still here to say it to me, but I am glad she is not here to see me with BC.

Salma - is it morning for you?  Are you feeling OK?  I worry about you ladies with little ones to take care of.  I am glad you like my sense of humor - I think that comes from my Mom too.  She was very ill for more than 25 years with a degenerative neuromuscular disease (in the Muscular Dystrophy group of diseases) and was very good at redefining her expectations so they fit her situation.  She found humor at the darkest of times and taught me, by her example, to weather the storm.          

Salma1971

SpecialK---Oh I think you got your fighting spirit from her too... I am sure she's looking over you and smiling now!

Yes it is morning... and I am finally feeling like myself again...since yesterday. I am planning to go groccery shopping alone... You know reading about all of you lovely ladies in the US, Canada and Australia... I feel in awe of what you are able to do on your own with the support of your families. I lived in London and Boston for a few years and it is difficult enough when you are away from home and having to juggle all responsibilities without any support, even without being a cancer patient. Now I live in good old little Jordan, where family all lives sooooooo close... and house help is aforddable for a middle income family. My mom was here for the whole time... (lives 10 minutes drive from my home) - two sisters in law from my brothers' sides... another two sisters in law from my husband's side--- The one with a toddler took care of my 3 year old, the one with primary school girls took care of my 7 year old - not to mention the moms of my sons school friends who also took him after school on other days. My father in law is driving my son to school and back every day... and over and above I have a really nice live-in helper, who's been with us for four years now and my 3 year old absolutely loves her. She's going away for her annual vacation next week ;-( but that's ok with all the support I have... So in many ways I feel so blessed... and I so look up to you ladies for what you are able to do!

Nonetheless.. I think what really made it emotionally hard for me as a hands-on mom, team mom, class mom, who's always running around with my boys from activity to another is NOT being able to be the one taking care of them during the past week... I think that's what depressed me and pulled me down...

My you all be blessed with strength and positive energy

SpecialK

Salma - I am one of those moms just like you, at least I was when my children were young (they are in college now but everyone says I still baby them!) I was very involved with school, sports, etc.  It is hard when you feel like you are less than what you should be, whatever the reason.  Don't let it get you down because by allowing others to help you, you are showing your children the full circle of love - you give to others and it comes back to you.  What a wonderful thing that your family is all around you, doing what they can to help you.  Receiving their assistance is allowing them to give you love in the way that they can, and knowing you would do the same for them.   

sukie10

Ruffolo - We were diagnosed the same day. I think the chemo first thing really threw me for the biggest loop a week later. I was still trying to figure out how to tell everybody and then I had to tell them that also. As girls its in our DNA to make everyone feel good around us but have a good cry. I'm sure we all did. Remember also that chemo is throwing you into instant menopause that's just another wild ride on top of all of this. I worked right up until the very first treatment and with tests ect... I never really had time to process until last week when I was starting to feel better from treatment #1 and had nothing to do but wonder "is this really happening to me". Then I read the funny hair loss stories and the OMG thread and thought what a bunch of crazy people I've found-I love it.

I am planning on going back to work after treatment #2. I was a waitress at a busy tourist spot.That won't be possible, however, my boss has created a new position for me in the kitchen that is flex able and away from the general public so I think its doable.

Salma1971

SpecialK---- Are you SERIOUS?!!! Your children are in college?... Your photo does not show that AT ALL!!!

I have to agree with every word you are saying... We went through a similar experience with my borther in law last summer (Stage IV Lung Cancer) And it really helped us all to be able to lend a hand... no matter with what... Cancer hits the entire family... and it is healing to all of us to feel we have a role somehow in easing things up... For the first time in my life... I am admitting my weakness and I feel blessed with the love that is surrounding me... I think cancer is an enlightening experience..and I am sure we are all going to come out of it... wiser and stronger. Best of luck Salma

dragonfly1

SpecialK I knew there was a reason that I appreciated your sense of humor...my husband is British-keep that humor coming. How did that hair helmet go yesterday? 

thefuzzylemon:  I've been working during chemo. I've only had one round so far but the first one (TCH) was rough and my second one will be on Tuesday. I'm a social worker in the ER of a huge hospital. The oncologist told me to work as long as I feel like it and not to worry about it. She said the neulasta shot will cover me and to just use normal precautions and avoid anyone who is very obviously sick with flu, etc. So far, so good...the staff all try to help run interference to make sure I'm not exposed to anyone who is too sick but I try not to think about it too much. I have Herceptin weekly so I have blood levels drawn every week which makes me feel better because I have a very good idea what my white counts are on a regular basis. The biggest challenge is working during week one of the cycle when I feel pretty bad and I'm trying to manage the worst side effects. I just prefer to have the distraction of work because I know I would be very unmotivated at home. It's early though and we'll see if I can keep this up!

dogeyed

Emily and Fuzzy,

Thanks for telling me where asparagus is and I will start at the beginning.  My treatments will last until mid-July, then they'll FINALLY operate on my boob.  I'm not getting reconstruction, don't want to go in and out of hospital, just want it all to stop.  I'm 60 and tired, back hurts from car accident, just isn't in me to fight... it was hard enough for me to accept all this chemo, but I WILL say, as others have, my boob has improved SO much.  Before it hurt like the devil, all swollen with big red mark on it, and pain stopped about a week out from first chemo, and yesterday a few days from second chemo, it's actually resuming close to its normal shape and the red mark has finally decreased a little in size.  Gives me BIG hope, just hope this stuff doesn't spread.  GG

jenn_h

dogeyed...I was having soem heartburn issues and my doc said tums, mylanta and such were fine...

Is sleeping a problem for lots of you during the days right after chemo? I am having difficulty waking in the middle of the night and can't get back to sleep. I notice a lot of people are prescribed Ambien, does it work.

I have been getting the bloody noses too, but knock on wood, my Neulasta shot hasn't hurt yet after 3 times.

I'm glad to hear where this Asparagus post is I have GOT to read it!

Emily, I will still be with you, my last chemo is at the end of May, then surgery, then rad.

I think the big shave is tonight *sniff sniff* but it's pretty thin and pathetic now...I am going to take pics and make a photo journal and scrapbook page entitled "The Real Stages of Breast Cancer"

mks16

My last chemo is on June 1st, if all goes as scheduled, as I am on DD x8 schedule.

Then 25+5 rads after that. I am planning the big shave near the end of next week, if I can hold on to my hair till then. Its just as well, today is probably the lowest I've been emotionally, wouldn't want to go through the big haircut on top of everything.

The photo journal is a great idea Jenn. I took a few pictures of myself as I was going for my first chemo. I was very confident and strong, full make up, jewelery, nice clothing. It will be quite different for my second chemo, judging by my moods today but I still plan on taking pictures each time I go.