Please help, am in despair

Letlet

Hello, I am due for my last EC treatment next week and will start on Taxol shortly. Mentally and emotionally it has been rough for me but I have always hanged on. I am on the BCO boards  everyday for the past couple of months to get me through this and have always found encouragement and comfort. Please I hope I am not offending or upsetting anybody but I have realized that so many, many posters have had a recurrence and/or mets. I have just come to this realization today and it's hitting me hard. I started chemo thinking that if I do everything, (surgery, chemo, RT) that there's a mighty good chance that I will be okay but reading people's stories and posts about how it came back and/or spread despite everything, I think I'm losing a little bit of hope..

suzieq60

My oncologist told me to stay away from these boards because of what I might see happening to other people but I can't. The love and support here is wonderful. Yes there are some a lot less fortunate than us but we can give back to them with friendship, kind words and good wishes. Yes I may have a recurrence or mets BUT I know I've done everythng I can to keep this beast at bay and I have comfort in that. Don't lose hope. You're doing all you can - in time you will move on but at the moment you are still in treatment and it is all so overwhelming.

Meanwhile hang in there and know we are all here to love and support you ((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))

Sue

nowords

We can't control much, but we can control how we react.

 Live now, today.

 Worry is a waste of valuable time.

 Remember that those (many) without a recurrence probably are not on the boards often...

gillyone

Also note that there are hundreds and hundreds of people who posted here when they were going through treatment and then don't come back.

ICanDoThis

Yes, many of the women who post here have had recurrences.

The rest of the women who haven't had recurrences aren't posting here any more, or if they do, they are checking in on old friends, chat groups, or Christmas luncheons (my group is having one!). Most women who are diagnosed with breast cancer are completely cured by their initial treatment. After a year or so, they actually believe that they are done.

A small number are so unlucky as to have a recurrence or have mets discovered. And BC doesn't have a cured date. But women to whom this happens really are the minority. It truly stinks when this happens. But even they usually live for years afterwards.

I'm sorry that you are frightened. But remember that Herceptin has made HER2+ BC as treatable as HER2-. And you are doing all the right things.

Maybe a break is in order for you, or perhaps your oncologist has a social worker on staff. I saw an oncology counselor for a while after my treatment was over. It's pretty normal for this whole thing to be pretty overwhelming.

In the meantime, congrats on being almost halfway through treatment. Sure, it sucks. But it will be over soon.

Sue

Letlet

Thank you ladies, thank you for reminding me of all these things. It's hard not to think of anything else except BC with me at this point. I had just read a post on some lady with a problem with her implants and I'm thinking are you kidding me! I look forward to my exchange surgery as a milestone to going back to "normal" and to read that there might be complications with those too is quite disheartening.

IllinoisNancy

Don't be afraid of recurrence.  I am fighting it now and I know I will beat it again.  It's not the end of the world when it happens.  The reason I'm getting through it is because I have this board and all my friends who lift me up.  This forum is a true blessing.

Take care,

Nancy

LRM216

You must remember that there are countless women living full lives away from any cancer forums whatsoever that have never had to deal with this beast again. 

On a forum such as this, you will find those afraid of a possible diagnose, those newly diagnosed, those going through or just completing treatment, such as yourself, and unfortunately those that have recurred or progressed.  And then, of course, there are those of us that have built a comraderie and strong bonds with sisters we will never meet, but who are oftentimes more understanding of our fears, pains, etc., then our own natural born sisters and family members that suffer this disease only through us (thank God).  Who better than another gal fighting this battle do we have to go to. 

I stay because my interest in finding new information is fulfilled here, and I can share any fear I have of any ache or pain I might feel.  I also like to think I am paying it forward to those new to the site.  God knows all these wonderful women were here for me and got me through many a baaaaaaaad night.  

Trust in your treatment and know that you are doing everything you can possibly do so that you hopefully will never have to fight this again.  God bless,

Linda