Taboo subject

mollynminnie

Oh-  and thank you ALL for your support and understanding....  

Oh, and the tabloid headlines crack me up too....  but maybe that is what I did with "Taboo Subject"?  Well, at least I didn't use caps!    

otter

Hi, molly,

I think it's a good thing you've decided to seek help for something that is bothering you as much as this is. I still am not convinced that you are the one with the "problem".  But, that doesn't matter -- what matters is that you find someone who can help you work through your feelings and be at peace with them (or whatever it is they do).

Some of my long-distance family members wanted everything to be about them, even when I was the one in the middle of chemo.  So, there's more I could say on this; but that's not the purpose of this thread.  Plus, you've already said what needed saying (as have others).  I'll just offer my hugs...

otter

1Athena1

Good luck to you Molly. I hope that therapy helps you in this. It is hard not to come out of cancer treatment unscathed in some way whether because of your reality or that of others.

mollynminnie

Thank you all!  Love you ladies!

I went to a support group last night.  A newly diagnosed stage I lady was extremely distraught.  I went over to her and just hugged her.  We both had tears streaming down our faces.  I realized later that I was feeling empathy for her- because she is having a tough time- that's it!  And I would have felt the same for a Stage 0 to Stage IV gal.  I think I'm getting IT!

 

libraylil

I hope none of you will object to my posting on this board.  Right now my onco is thinking I am a a IIB.  I finished my chemo last week and will have a lumpectomy Jan 4.  Then we'll know more exact pathology as to what has shrunk and how many nasty lymph nodes are hanging out there.  Like many of you I worked through my tx, except for the day of chemo.  ONly because that was right for me.  It kept my mind off of BC. 

I have met so many incredibly brave and strong women on this board and in the infusion room.  Throughout this I have also learned that 3 other women that have students at my school are fighting some sort of cancer.  Also when I am shopping I notice women that obviously use the same "hair stylist" I use.

We are all awesome and wonderful.  We can't help some of the feelings we experience.  This is a very emotional time for all of us.  With the holidays right around the corner it just adds to the emotions pouring out. 

Molliminnie you can't help what you feel.  You are being honest and that takes guts.  Beth

anonymice

"She made me look in her eyes and said, "You listen to me -- whatever other people are going through does not negate what you are going through. That is them and this is you. You are entitled to your feelings."

JO-5, thanks so much for sharing that.  I will remember it to tell people when they tell me that they shouldn't complain because their problems are nothing to mine - sums it up succinctly. 

mom3band1g

So, I saw this header under "active topics" and had to click.  Forgive me if I am intruding but I did want to add my 2 cents.  I am one of those DCIS women.  I found my lump last December when I was 39.  I have felt very guilty for feeling scared, mad, etc because I was so 'lucky' to be pre-invasive.  My own Mother told me I didn't really even have cancer.  I had a lumpectomy with failed margins.  I had to have a mastectomy and then 6 weeks of radiation.  I still struggle with feeling like I didn't really have a right to be scared.  The truth is though, I did have a loss.  I did lose my breasts like many other women and I did lose 6 weeks to radiation.  I wouldn't ever compare myself to those with a higher stage than I.  I know my risk for recurrence is very low and for this I should feel thankful.  I cannot help but be angry that I lost my breasts.  I think I am more upset by the mast than anything else! 

I guess I have learned that we can never truly know what is going on with someone else.  People all cope differently and just because someone looks one way on the outside doesn't really mean anything.  I am almost embaressed to tell people what I have been through.  I never tell anyone I had DCIS.  We all have our struggles and all we can do is try and help each other.

Hope I haven't stepped on toes or offended anyone.