September 2010 Rads

dutchgirl6

Hi Fiver05, welcome to the group, it's never too late to join.  Good luck with your CT scan tomorrow. I know what you mean by reading and not posting.  When I first found this site it was just after my first surgery when I had lots of time on my hands.  I learned so much just from reading the various boards, I felt ready to tackle anything that my doctors threw at me. 

Good night all, I'm exhausted.  Six hours on my feet after five months of "relaxing" on the couch have caught up with me.  But, it felt good to be back at work again.

DiamondGirl

Hi:

Sespebadger ~ thanks for your detailed input.  I appreciate it.  In fact thanks to the BCO board that I read about other ladies not taking Tamoxifen while doing rads.  My med. onc wanted me to continue to take it, but now that he's on a month long vacation his partner said the ultimate say is with my rad. onc.  I'm so glad that I got that clarification.

Good nite all! 

shells43

Hey,

Speaking of bras, I was awake in the middle the night (as usual) and saw an ad for the "AhhBra" which looks very comfy, 3 for $60. Has anyone tried these? I know I need to get something soon since I'm starting radiation in a few days. The 'no bra' option is not an option. I have to go to work!

BocaCiegaBabe

Style wise they look perfect shelly, but I see they are nylon and spandex.  I was told I needed to wear cotton, were you?  They directed me to Walmart where cheapo cotton sports bras go for 2/$10.  My pretty bras are on the shelf for now.  Luckily for me, I am not working and am small busted so I can easily go bra-less, which I'm finding to be the most comfortable way right now.

 bubbalu...still sending good wishes your way that it will go smoothly!

Mel, I think the redness is still to come.  We are early yet.  My techs mentioned that it's most often after the first two weeks.  I just finished my 9th today, and have what looks like a little mild rash, only on the area that has had previous sun damage.  The breast, which has never seen the light of day, is fine.  Seems like that would be reversed, doesn't it?

 

Bambaloos

I had #2 today (only 34 more to go!!!).  It has all gone smoothly, I am feeling a little tired, but wondering if that is just me coming down from my anxiety or the radiation.  I also felt super depressed yesterday after my first treatment - that is probably me just thinking about the other 35 more treatments.  I have been smacking on the emu oil and drinking lots of water.  This too shall pass.................hope everyone is doing well.

DiamondGirl

Speaking of bras, I bought Warners wire-free from JCPenneys and they were selling Buy 2 get 1 Free.  They are the most comfortable thing and I'm not big busted.  The seams are very well put together and they are also tag free.  The material is very very soft and they are great to be worn under T-shirts.  I've also tried on the bras at Walmart but they are just a thin cotton layer without much support.  I couldn't even wear the sports bra, I'm still too sore to.

I have a question about the lines drawn during the dry-runs....?

I had the films done today and there were 2 techs helping me.  Not the nicest of people, one gal is rather cold.  When she was using the sharpie on me, one would be gentle and the other is rough and unfortunately, she was not careful on my scar

My question is...what do your lines look like?  I thought it was supposed to be a rectangle box and that was it.  Mine was more like a computer graphic with right angles here and there.  I also felt that the gal (the not so caring one) was doing it in haste.  

I normally have great rapport with people right away but this time I'm not sure if I even like to be around these 2 gals for 6.5 weeks.  What an awful feeling

jsmiley60

Hey Paula that is not nice that the wommen today weren't nice to you! Everyone is so super nice at my radiation center. Maybe the cold one was having a bad day?

Bubbalu: praying that all goes well with you!

I had treatment number 4 out of 36 today. Starting to relax a little more and get used to the routine. Sigh.

DiamondGirl

Thanks jsmiley60.  I didn't want to think that I'm starting to be super sensitive.  I am not that type but  today's "coldness" got to me.  Maybe I'm nervous myself, but you know what, I'm too old to not being able to decipher "warm or cold". 

Thing is, what else can I do?  Big sigh!

Paula

SweetMarci

My rad onc told me to buy front-closing sports bras from Wal-Mart.  They are 2 for $10 which is very cheap,  They are all cotton and about as comfortable as you can get in a bra.

BocaCiegaBabe

Marci, Word for word, that's what my rad oncologist told me.  Are you going to the START center?

Paula...so sorry about the attitude you faced.  That's just what you don't need!  Hopefully, it will get better.  Regarding the lines, mine looked lopsided, definitely not a square....until I held my arms up over my head as they are positioned on the table.  Voila...perfect square.  

As to relaxing, I am not.  I'm not afraid of the machine, but I get really tense and apprehensive each time I walk in that room.  I commented on it to them yesterday, told them I couldn't put my finger on why it was happening.  He asked if I was afraid of the machine, and that's not it.  He said,"Maybe it's the entire process", and the more I think about that, the more I think he hit on it.  Not so much the process, but "cancer" has just really hit home.  I didn't need chemo.  Taht would make it hit home.  There is a whirlwind around you during diagnosis, little time to think, then you have your surgery and it's done.  You are healing.  I was sort of moving away from anything that said I had cancer.  I think now, walking into that room, every day I'm reminded big time of just what is going on, and it's finally getting to me. Not that I didn't know I had cancer....but the looks of that machine almost has the word written all over it.  I dunno.  I know that my blood pressure is responding poorly to it.  I've taken meds for about a decade for it yet the evening of my first treatment I could actually feel it was high so took it.  Sure enough 163/95.  Monday when the nurse took it it was 140something/90something.  Not good, so I'm watching it.  

 bubbalu...I'm SO glad things are going better for you this time.  One step closer, each day!

shells43

DiamondGirl - how about taking some cupcakes in one day (or something like that) and see if the attitudes change? Then you'll be their favorite patient. Heaping hot coals....

Thanks for the tip on the open front sports bras. I'll check for them next time I'm at WM, I have some jeans to return. Why can't I find non-stretch jeans anymore? Ugh. Just want plain denim with no stretch. They look awful.

Going today for my simulation. Wish me luck. My Rad Onc did the drawings himself and the cute tech did my tattoos. So far we are all getting along well. I might just take cupcakes for fun! 

bubbalu

I'm on my 3rd day back to rads.  The WM sports bras that open in the front, cotton, Fruit of the Loom are great.  I bought some several sizes bigger so they won't be tight around my chest.  If you are wearing a micro boobie for now, they are double layered so you can cut a slit and slide it in.  Whoala!

BocaCiegaBabe:  I hear you on the BP.  I have white coat hypertension so I'm always up when I go there.  I can't relax on the table either, I keep expecting something bad to happen, don't know why.  It seems it takes forever to get thru a tx.  I get 5 zaps and count down each one.  Music to my ears is 'you can take your arm down now honey".  I keep my eyes closed tight.  Don't like to see that machine so close to me. 

This too shall pass..............mid week crunch!

dutchgirl6

Hmm, cupcakes are always the right size, colour and style.  How could your rad team not love you if you bring them some goodies!

The techs who are working with me are all friendly, very professional, polite and respectful.  I just wish that they would lighten up!  I do understand that radiation, whether you are on the receiving or the giving end, is nothing to trivialize, but they are all so serious.  Maybe I should try the cupcakes.

I will have to find some inexpensive bras too, Fruit of the Loom you say?  I have one athletic bra that I bought after surgery that is extremely comfortable, but it was quite pricey, and I don't have the money right now to invest another hundred bucks.  I will hit the department stores and look around.

Shelley, I hope that the simulation goes well.  Aren't you starting tx this week?

Bambaloos, I was told to only use water based moisturizers, have you spoken to anyone about using emu oil?  I know that it is amazing stuff, but I would be careful about using it at this time.

BocaCiegaBabe, I hope that you can get that BP under control, you certainly don't need another thing to worry about at this time.  I am usually pretty calm around medical procedures, but I can totally relate to that kind of anxiety.  To me, this whole experience has been otherwordly, and a bit surreal.  The radiation is more tangible, and the fact that I am lying there and can see and hear the machine doing its job makes it real.  Also, as I move closer to the end of treatment, the "what nows" are starting to creep into my thoughts.  Lying on the table just gives my mind more opportunity to think.

Well, I'm off to #7, almost halfway there!   

MelBell07

Hey All,

Tom's of Maine deodorant has been sucking for me...I always feel like I stink! Every time I go for rads I apologize after having to lift up my arms. Anyone else have any other suggestions for deodorant during this time?? Thanks!

julia2

MelBell07, The Rad Tech gave me  a spray, 'Naturally Fresh Deodorant Crystal''  website is www.tccd.com  Don't know what to tell you re: how effective, I don't feel like I'm having a big problem even using nothing, I did use the deodorant last weekend when I was outside in the sun all day and it seemed to work.

Julia

kaydub

Hi girls, I had my first rad tx yesterday and when the machine started up I cried through the whole thing.  I haven't cried about the surgeries, chemo, loss of hair or anything until now.  Today I didn't cry so I guess it was just nerves.

MellBell , I have been usingTom's of Maine deoderant and haven't noticed it not working. Others use corn starch but I don't know how well that works.

 Diamond Girl, I'm sorry that you had an unpleasant experience with your techs.  I love Dutch Girl's idea about taking in cupcakes.  That would make me less cranky.

nwshannon

So here I am on day 6 of Rads & now I have an infection on the side of my breast & at the incision site, it is hot, swollen & pink. I am so frustrated now I am seeing the breast surgeon tomorrow to get it drained & today at the onc. office I got the two shots of antibiotics on my booty which HURTS! So no Rads until this clears up, looking to see of anyone else has had this problem or has an experience, I am 8 weeks out of lumpectomy surgery with no complications & now this.

sespebadger

Today will be #16 of 33. Last night my skin started to hurt, but aloe cooled it down. Hot flashes at night do not help! Thanks, chemo. 

 I've been thinking about radiation. We've all heard, "it's a cakewalk compared to chemo." When we get through radiation, maybe we can compare. However, none of us know how our skin will do and if we will have other side effects. My 6 mos of chemo were very unpleasant (and I did loose all my hair), but it had a rythm to it: a few bad days and then gradually better until the next treatment, then repeat. BMX after chemo was scary but not as bad as I expected and I got gradually better. With radiation things just keep getting worse, and we don't know ahead how much worse. I find that the unknown is the hardest. I keep telling myself that even if I have a few bad weeks, during the last sessions and even after the treatments are over (for a total of 2 weeks? 3? 4?), that will be a shorter amount of overall time then the chemo treatment took. Anyone else not like this march into worse and worse? I know I can do it, and I know all of us can do it, but I'm just saying.....Radiation is no fun. "Cakewalk" will be removed from my vocabulary. Anyone else feel this way?  

And good luck with those radiation techs. I like mine (there are four that rotate), although it seems like some are more precise than others. I talk to them all the time.They probably think I'm a blabbermouth, but talking takes the edge off for me.

Good luck everyone!

krhilde

Greetings from Texas!  Would love to join the group! Finished chemo last week, (whoo hoo!) and I am scheduled for a CT scan on Sept.. 21, with radiation to start the following week for 33 treatments.  They didn't say anything about a simulation, so I'll have to ask about that if it's not brought up.  Looking forward to hearing about everyone else's experiences.  Thanks for getting this started Dutchgirl!

dutchgirl6

Hi khilde, welcome aboard.  Isn't it great to be finished with chemo!  You will probably have your simulation when you get your CT scan next week, also your tattoos.

MelBell, I once heard somebody refer to it as "chemostench".  I went through a phase where I was constantly asking my DH if I smelled bad, his response was always no.  Maybe it's only you that smells it.  In any case I'm sure that the techs don't notice, they are dealing with this sort of thing all day long.

kaydub, it sounds like you had a huge emotional release, and that you needed it.  This whole experience can be so overwhelming, and I think that we sometimes hold everything in just so we can get through it all.  You never know when the floodgates are going to open.  I hope that you are feeling better today.

nwshannon, I'm sorry about the complications.  What a frustrating experience for you.  I hope that the infection clears up soon, and you can get back to finishing the treatment.

sespebadger, your posting made a lot of sense.  I told myself that radiation would be a walk in the park compared to the marathon of chemo, and so far so good, but I'm not even halfway yet and who knows what the next week or so will be like.  I think it's safe to say that all of this cancer stuff sucks!

So, I had zap #7 today......NOT!  The computers were down, and they sent me home.  I wondered, because as I was walking to my waiting room, passing all of the rad suites, I noticed signs in all the windows saying that they were all delayed.  When I got the to waiting room, it was full of other gowned people.  After 30 minutes, one of the techs came in and said that they didn't know how long it would be till the server was up and running again, and they told those of us who live in town that we could go home and come back tomorrow.  Argh!  So, that circle on my calendar is no longer valid, and I will have to add one day to my treatment.  I hope that this doesn't happen often.

Have a good day everyone.

 

Dawn46

sespebadger-My radiation doc told me the same thing "this will be a wlak through the park compared to chemo" I am getting a little nervous now too. I had my simulation this past Monday and starting my 33 treatments next week. I am also still having alot of problems with the hot flashes and night sweats.

bubbalu

Since I did chemo first, I can speak to the chemostench.  AC: All body wastes were awful, the underarms I had to wash 4 times a day and thank heaven for the baby wipes.  Sometimes I would wear a mask when I went to the BR.  Taxotere however for me eliminated all body odors.  Still to this day I don't sweat, don't have any underarm body odor (finished 6/3) so I don't have to use any deodorant so far.  I wouldn't put anything on the treated underarm ever during rads.  I use Toms of Maine all the time, the normal life before cancer.  If I need something I will use cornstarch. However, I'm 70 so I don't get the hot flashes!

As the 'walk in the park' so far it hasn't been for me.......just hoping I can complete it whatever it takes.  Chemo was awful for me.  Surgery is turning out to be the easiest part.

I feel so lucky that I don't have to go to work after txs because I'm so slimy from the Aquaphor I slather on after tx.  I've found that wearing organic cotton tanks with the skinny straps under a hoodie to treatments works.  It's always cold in the waiting area anyway (no hair) so I have the hoodie to put on over my smock until they call me.  After tx, I take off the smock, put the tank back on, slather up, come home and take off the hoodie and replace it with a XXL cotton tshirt that I cut down the front and hemmed to slip on over my slimy tank.  That gives me air in there!  I wear that until bedtime then put on a clean tank for the next day.  Easy to wash and comfortable.  Too much information????

DiamondGirl

Hi sistas,

BocaCiegaBabe - thanks for the info re: the lines.  I tried raising my arm up and no it wasn't it.  The lines are drawn straight, then a right angle and then turn right angle, go up and then another angle like someone was having fun making a pattern.  I remember I was told that they don't need to draw any line when I did the simulation.  About your high bp, my rad onc is telling me to start taking Vit. D3, between 1,000 - 2,000 I.U. a day.  When my DH googled it, the D3 helps with blood pressure and better sleep and everything else.  

Shelleyj43 - thanks for the cupcake idea.  I will bring them something and see if little "goodies" help.  Good luck on your simulation.

Dutchgirl16 - ditto on that.

Nwshannon - the scar on my breast is not healing well at all.  It's puckered and it is causing the aerola to be swollen and it is very tender.  BS said that the rads will make it worse.  I was told to take either IB profen or Alieve daily as they will take care of infections.

Kaydub - you took the words out of my mouth.  The experience is surreal.  How's your day #2 going? 

sespebadger - I totally agree.

khilde - welcome to this group.

Sorry if I'd forgotten anyone, it's my nervous brain at work right now.  Prayers to all.

dutchgirl6

BTW, I can't take credit for the bringing cupcakes suggestion, you can thank my friend Shelleyj43 for that idea.

BocaCiegaBabe

Shelley--have you looked at Lucky jeans?  They have a bajillion styles.  Mine have no stretch in them.  Button up fly, which as you unbutton, says "Lucky You".  I am careful not to wear them to any Dr appts.  Hope your simulation went well.  Know you are anxious to start.

bubbalou...so glad it's all going smoothly so far.  You brought up a good point on the sizing of the sports bras at Walmart.  I bought a 34, my normal bra size, but it was too tight.  Will send those to my daughter as I'd already taken the tag off and she can use more jog bras.  Next bought a 36 and actually think I could have gotten by with a 38 instead.  You want loose. I like the rusching (sp) in the front.  Unlike most sports bras, it means you don't get smashed down.

dutchgirl.  Yikes no!  I would not want to chance ruining a $100 bra!.  The Walmart sports bras are cheap enough that if they get inked up, it doesn't matter. Agree with you...this is such an other-worldly experience.  I know we all must keep asking ourselves what in heck are we doing here.  This is NOT us!  BP was better today and hopefully will stay that way.  I am at the very end of reading "The Girl Who Played with Fire", and at a critical point, totally absorbed.  When they called my name to come in,  I must have jumped two feet off the chair.  LOL  Now they probably think I'm wacko.  Your issue with "what's next" when this ends is so very natural as you've had so many months of continuous treatment and being proactive, with a plan.  It will take adjustment, but the plan is still there, just for less frequent visits.  Sorry you missed #7.  It's a disappointment to have to move that date back a day!!

MelBel, I'm using something called Crystal.  Has a pink ribbon on it.  No aluminum.  Available at Walgreens.  It's funky sort of in that you have to moisten the end of it then rub it on.  Seems to be working.

{{{ katydub }}} Good you got it out of you and I'm sure they have seen that before.

nwshannon...I developed an infection too, but mine was 3 weeks after my otherwise uneventful lumpectomy and popped up out of the blue.  Like you, mine was hot, pink and swollen.  Hopefully your antibiotic shots will knock it right out!  I took something orally for 2 weeks and mine was slow to leave.  LOL...it was so hard to judge if it was getting less pink, I kept asking my husband to look and tell me what he thought.  He loved it.  :>

sespebadger, my thinking is if you can get through chemo and all that brings, you can get through anything.  It had to be rough, physically and emotionally!  I didn't have to do that and the idea of that possibility had really frightened me.  You guys are made of steel!!

khilde...greetings from South Texas.  What area are you in?

Question...how many "shots" of radiation are you all getting?  I only get two, the first it's positiioned high up on the right side shooting at an angle down, and the second, quite low on the left, shooting at an angle up.  I've noticed others mention more.  Some a lot more!

SweetMarci

BocaCiegaBabe - Yes I'm going to the START center.  Both chemo and radiation are  being done with them.  I go for radiation at the Stone Oak location and chemo was in the Med Center.  I feel so lucky after reading some of the posts about attitudes.  I have had the best attitudes from doctors, nurses, medical assistants, etc.  They have made this so much easier with their caring and helpful attitudes.

BocaCiegaBabe

Paula, we were writing at the same time.  Interesting about the D3.  I get 1,000 units in the Citrical I started taking with Arimidex.  I do sleep better!  BP was 113/70 after today's treatment. so even on the low side.  It's weird that it can go shooting up despite everything if I'm at all stressed.  Immediately following my surgery it was something/100 and they gave me shots twice to get it where they wanted it.  Pretty quick acting, whatever they were.  I exercise like a banshee, keep my weight in line...heavens knows where it'd be without that!!

SweetMarci, I'm at Stone Oak too.  Steve and Christina?  

SweetMarci

BocaCiegaBabe -

Yes to Steve and Christina!  It's a small world........

BocaCiegaBabe

Oh gosh...it really is!

DiamondGirl

BocaCiega ~ yes, your'e absolutely right about nerves.  I keep replaying what to do in my sleep, hence I had a bad night

SweetMarci + BocaCiega ~ you gals are so lucky.  Although I've gotta say that I loved my BS and his nurses and people at the office.  Med. Onc was good, people at his office are ok.  I like my Rad Onc too and his assistant but I didn't see that gal.  During this whole BC journey, I've met so many wonderful people.  In fact I was shopping at Auto Zone yesterday trying to get a sheep skin seat belt wrap.  The lady and I talked and I told her I will be needing it because of radiation.  She said she's been there, had to have both breasts zapped and she came out of the counter to give me a hug and told me that she'll pray for me. 

I'm hoping that the one gal was just having a bad day.