Stating Opinion's!!!

nobleanna007

I just want to say the few times I have come on the stage3 board I have been felt to be unwelcomed! I do not try to upset anyone, but I will tell the truth. I am not the best writer, I talk on the phone much better. LOL!!! But I do hve alot of compassion for everyone who has to go through this journey. No I did not have a easy time with it at all! And some will as my BF did. Unfournatly I am allergic to alot of meds, so no it was not easy for me, but I state that fact. I do not apprecite being told that what I think is a bunch of bull! This BC is not a easy thing to over come!!! And I so have compassion for anyone starting this journey. I have another friend who says she feels sorry cause she has baby cancer cause she is stage 1.  Cancer is cancer whether we our stage 1 0r 3!!  We are always monitered. WHY???????????? If we are cancer free!!! This is all that I was trying to stress, we are never over it not matter what we do! I have bloodwork, Pet Scan etc. so how do you put it behind you and say I am alright?????

I am sorry if this upsts people but it is the truth as we all know it!!!! And I am not going to sugar coat it like its not!!!

B

nobleanna007

I guess know one cares to answer me or write back, thats okay cause I am used too it from this site!  I have never felt welcomed and you know what???? That is okay I may just have a diffrent opinion or do not write as I feel and connect with you all!

But I stand behind my words whether you all agree with me or not!!!! And if you chose on purpose to ignore me, hey thats okay I will still write what I feel and thats all I have to say! No Sugar Coting from MOI, if you go through it better than I am so happy for you!!! TRULY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Take Care Friends!

B

hopeful34

I am sorry you feel like no one is listening.  I try to help people on here when I actually have some sort of knowledge that might help them.  I haven't experienced most things yet, so I cannot speak on most things.  I will say I have noticed that I have had to bump my posts a few times (sometimes) before I get responses.  I almost always eventually get someone who will talk to me though.  Maybe, just try to bump your post and eventually someone might respond.  I personally being fairly new to this BC thing....appreaciate someone who does not sugar coat things.  I want the truth, no matter how crappy it might be.  Just try and hang in there.  There are people that do benefit from your experience.  Don't feel bad for being honest.  I don't know what you are referring to as far as people getting upset with you, but just try and explain yourself and maybe they will understand what you are saying better.  I hope you start feeling better.  I know for myself, I have already had so many ups and downs.  To put it bluntly I have been pretty bitchy lately with everything going on.  My husband just told for the 10th time today, that I need to be positive.  I starting crying and told him I don't see where being positive is going to get me.  We are not rich people and I told him it would be alot easier to be positive if we had money.  I think the people that remain positive must either A.) have an escape B.) have much more strength than I do.  I guess what I am saying is everyone handles this differently and you shouldn't have to feel bad for how you feel.  I wish you the best and I hope you don't feel so isolated.  Take Care.  Allison

Bugs

I'm sorry you feel that way, B.  For me the stage 3 forum is a haven...very accepting and loving.  I haven't been responding to posts as much this summer as a) I've been super busy ..can you say preteen with activities and his baseball?   Sheesh, he keeps me moving.  and b) I'm trying to stay away from cancer talk.  I check in, though.

 Hugs to you.  Your feelings are your feelings and are valid.

squidwitch42

B,

I really appreciate your compassion...we all need and deserve it.  I will often times read stage three and stage four stories, and am not sure if I should respond, as I am stage two. But I too feel compassion for all, including my own journey. I also tend to put it out there, and don't avoid topics.  Just me, but I do realize that before the grace of God go I, and my circumstances can change at any time..just like they already have!  It helps me lead a more honest life (at least I hope it does.) So without knowing your previous experiences, I wanted to acknowledge your post, and tell you i am grateful for your compassion. I hope you can find the support you are looking for...I also attend a support group on a weekly basis and have a one on one counselor to help support my fears and feelings about having cancer and the loss of my breasts (as well as my uterous and ovaries...) My counselor is a Psychiatrist resident through the Breast Care center.

take care,

Traci

jenn3

I apologize for not seeing this and I'm sorry that you're hurt.   I'm not exactly sure what situation or situations got you upset, but am sorry you feel that people aren't listening.  I find that there are times talking on the computer versus in person can sometimes be taken out of context.  Someone may be trying to make a statement without judgement and it comes across as harsh or or inconsiderate.  I try to remember that when I read a response that I find a little off. 

This cancer world that we've been thrown into is hard to navigate and can be very frustrating.  To answer your question how do you put it behind you and say you're alright.  You don't.  You can't get rid of it, but you can distract yourself from it.  Finding the new normal isn't easy, I myself am trying to find the new me within the old me.  Start by waking up and facing the day, put one foot in front of the other and there will come a day when you realize that you hadn't thought about cancer for an hour, a day, a few days, a week.  As for alright, if you're feeling bad and don't feel like expressing it to everyone, start with telling yourself, I'm okay I can make it through today and just like finding the new you, you will start to feel better physically and emotionally, but it does take time.  Again, I am only one year from diagnosis and still working to finding my way.  If you're feeling cooped up indoors, take a walk, enjoy a sunset or sunrise, listen to the laughter of a child, the beauty of a flower or the sound of birds singing. 

(((HUGS))) it gets better.

Joviangeldeb

Hi, B.  I'm not sure what happned here in the past with your prior posts, but do know I read and listen.  If I don't post, it just means I'm not sure what to say because perhaps I've not experienced what the person is posting about.  Or I may not see the original post because I'm unable to come here everyday.   Do know that you are welcome here, though.  Here's another (((((((hug))))). 

Deb 

nobleanna007

Thanks too all of you for your thoughts and prayers.

I am sorry if I have made people feel bad but, I only wanted to state my journey in this all!!!

  I am sorry to say it has not and continues to be a battel for me. And believe you me I have always been the tough one!. I am not trying too cause anyone pain or nonbelief, I am in hope that their will be a cure!!! If not for me than my daughter.

I read these boards cause I get so much imfo fro it!!! And its great!!!!

But yes I have had a hard time and Yes I may be bitter, or just not able to get over the hump, but I am trying, one step at a time!!! If anyone wants to pm me please do so, I have really pretty much been through it all, and stil have more too do!!!

Thanks again for all of you that support my opinion's!!!

B

nobleanna007

Wow!

Got alot of reaction's and thoughts from this post!!!

I wish you all the best and cancer free. But I am still taking meds. to keep it at bay.

So I am sorry if I upset anyone with my thoughts and words I only wish everyone the best outcome of this journey we are on. It is hard for me to put it behind me when I have 3 surgeries yet to go. I am sure this is some of my issues of not putting it behind me. Alot of you all will have it alot easier than I have had, and I am sorry if I sound like a downer. Its my view only!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HUGS-B

jenn3

nobleanna - I know it seems hard and it is hard, but you can and will get through this.  There are some days that are much harder than others.  I found it easier to not compare myself to others, especially when I was having a bad day and read how easy it seemed for others.  It gets better.

AnacortesGirl

Jenn -

You hit it on the head for me.  It took me a while to realize that I was never going to find someone who was an exact fit that I could compare myself to.  Once I got over that it became easier.  But on the bad days it would just irritate me that others would talk about how easy taxol was when it was kicking my butt.  I finally was able to let it go and understand that I am different - we all are different - in how we feel physically and emotionally.  All we know is we are justified in our feelings.  They're real and their ours whether others understand them or not.  It's OK.

nobleanna007 -

Looking at your dx you've been fighting this a long time.  And you mentioned that you have 3 surgeries to go.  Would you mind sharing your story?

Frankie_

Nobleanna-I have been on a 2 week vacation and just came across your post. Just wanted to reach out and send you a ((((BIG HUG))) Did you feel IT??? I hope you're feeling better since your initial post.

Frankie

navygirl

noble, 

I don't normally respond in the areas for which my diagnosis doesn't fit, but your post touched me and I wanted to tell you that you are not alone. I don't know what other post you put out there that was not responded too, but I totally understand your feeling. In my journey, I felt like I was hitting obstacles with every turn. I had a traumatic outcome to my BMX which required moths of physical therapy, the A/C part of my chemo was a breeze once they got the nausea under control, but then the taxol/herceptin part kicked my ass up and down the street. I was so strung out from fatigue, vomiting, allergies to the herceptin etc. that I DREADED the days after each treatment - which was 12 weeks worth. I'm so sorry you are having a rough road as well...hand in there lovey, it does get better. It sometimes takes a lot longer than anyone understands -or in some cases BELIEVES it does to get back to your new normal...but eventually you will get there. Hang in there and you post as much of your truth as you have to in order to make it through...

XOXOXO

Bonnie 

karen1956

B.....just wanted to send you ((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))......This is a hard journey...but doable....I finished chemo 4 years ago today (just realized the date on another post)....that must be good....self talk is good.....tell yourself that you will be okay and maybe one day you'll believe it.....slowly, the farther I get from Tx, the better I do.....the acceptance part is saying that I am different than who I was before!!!  Wishing you an easy time as you finish Tx....and keep posting.  Karen

AsiaYM

B, my dear,

For those who didn't welcome your words, don't pay attention to them. Just imaging they are having a bad hair day or something and brush it off.   Embrace with the good ones.  Never mind with a little thing like that.

Hugs,

chasinghope

Noble,

You're right cancer is cancer but there are people that care. We are all going through cancer, yes, different stages but bottom line is cancer sucks. It can take your identity away from you. I try to go one day at a time. Right now, I'm trying to start up a support group in New England. Have you thought about getting into a support group around your area? I usually stay off the threads that are different from my diagnoses so I don't offend anyone. I try to be very careful not to upset or insult anyone, but I've been through surgery, had both breast removed and chemo, I hope I'm allowed to say pm me whenever you want, if you just want to vent, I'll listen. Have a goodnight.

SusieMTN

B you said you had 3 surgeries left?  Reconstruction????