Diagnosed 6 Months Ago Today & Extremely Emotional About It

Theresa1790

I am surprised to find myself so emotional over this anniversary.  I have been excited looking forward to being 6 months cancer free on June 15th but then today has hit me out of the blue!  I find myself starting to cry for what seems to be no reason all day but I know it's the anniversary that's causing it.  Months 1 thru 5 have gone by with no problem at all.  Has this happened to anyone else?

3jaysmom

hey theresa; ive gone thru bdmx. chemo, als in the last 11/2 yrs, and everytime i mark an anniv., or discover yet another gift from treatment, it takes a little while 2 cath my breath..ie stop crying..some greiving is involved in all this cancer stuff... a few days ago  i was weepy all day..i was having a hard time playing my playstation!!!it's the 1 thing that occupies my mind, as physically, i'm still catching up. for awhile i felt like cancer had taken away something else. i did some deep breathing, some stretches, and got back on game. slowly, im learning to use controller another way!!( i have chemo induced neuropathy)  my point is, those moments PASS and the same fight that got u cancer FREE yeah, is the same fight u have and will continue with.. it's strong women fighting (and winning) this fight. hang in there, i'm sure more ladies will be along soon...

Theresa1790

Thank you so much!!!  BTW, I have chemo induced neuropathy too.  I finished chemo in late April and it has improved but I'm still taking my B-100's to help with it.  Hope yours gets better soon!

ruthbru

The 'anniversarys' are always tough. I get very wierd each February (or crabby, as my husband would say!). It just brings everything back to the 'you have cancer' moment, and I think it is a grieving. Also, I get almost physically sick before each recheck appointment and go out in the car and cry like a baby after they tell me everything is fine. I think you just have to accept the fact that you will have these feelings, acknowledge them, give yourself a little time to cry, or swear or whatever you need to do, and then pick up, move on and enjoy all the good things in life. Ruth

dlb823

Theresa ~ Getting a breast cancer diagnosis is so shocking for most of us, and then having to face one or more surgeries, chemo, radiation.... it's all just overwhelming.  So what our brains tend to do is compartmentalize some of our emotions, so that they don't overwhelm us.  Loss, sadness, grief, anger, fear -- these are feelings that many of us don't get to work through in the whirlwind of our diagnosis and treatment, but at some point they need to and will surface.  Anniversaries are one of those times, and finishing our treatment can be another.  It's like we let some of the worry go, so our minds think -- oh, now you have room to deal with this and brings up the sadness that you'd had to push aside earlier to survive what you had to go through.  It's all very normal, and may actually continue for awhile.  I recently had to book some 2 year followup tests, and that feeling of dismay and terror just enveloped me one day as I was on the phone discussing the need for an MRI.  It was totally unexpeced.  I got off the phone and cried uncontrollable for a few minutes as the feeling of what I'd gone through just flooded back so vividly.   (((Hugs))) & just know that what you're going through is not only normal but necessary and healthy.    Deanna

iodine

I totally agree.  You finally have "time" and brain and emotion space, wheather an anniv. or not to acctually wrap your head around the fact that you've had Freekin' Cancer!  OMG. 

So go with whatever your feelings are.  It gets better.  Honest.

Hugs,