So I did a photoshoot...

bambers88

I can't even believe I did this. So I came across this ad from a local college student looking for models to complete her Senior Exhibition. Her major is Photography (happen to have a pretty big camera myself) and the theme she decided on was "Scars". Long story short, my photo is up at the ASU Herberger Institute of Art Gallery 100! I was both nervous and proud to put myself on display like that, but I do believe it has not only done myself some good, but I think I helped to shed some light on the subject for many people. Opening reception was standing room only.Some people would look at it and cringe and almost run from it like it was going to reach out and get them. Others would cringe and step in for a better look at it. Others just stood there and talked amongst themselves, pointing here and there. I was told more than once that night that I had a pretty big set of balls. Although I took that as a compliment, I think I'll ask my plastic surgeon if she can transplant them instead of silicone.

Yeah for me! =-)

barbe1958

I am VERY proud of you and I don't even know you! You done good! 

diana50

WOW....good for you** i can see how doing something like this would give you a bit of a boost**

getting really comfortable with our bodies....after all of this.......is part of the healing in my opinion**

diana50

AnacortesGirl

I'm applauding you (can you hear me clapping?)!  It takes real acceptance of your body and who you are to let someone photograph such a personal experience.  I don't know if I'll ever get there but that's my aspiration.

It's good that it has people talking.  We can all use some exposure to what others go through. It lets us know that what we have to face is doable and that there are other people out there who are facing different challenges and living through them with true grace and strenght.

Irishtess

BRAVO!  I join the others in admiring your courage and strength!

Wonderland

Good for you! I'm so proud of you for doing this. I have read another post where the writer was troubled about a billboard she saw on the highway. It was about BC and had a beautiful, nicely dressed, great hair (you get the picture) woman on it saying "I will not give up" (or something like that). The writer and many women who replied thought the billboard was not truthful: it didn't show the scars, the pain, the emotional roller coaster through this woman.

You, on the other hand, are showing the true side to BC. Thank-you!

By the way, one of the woman who responded to the post is Stage IV. She said that she has not given up, but that she's run out of options. I don't think we will ever see that on a billboard.

Wonderland

Lowrider54

We are all troubled by the perky representation of breast cancer...I am still determined to get a calendar together showing the true side of what we have to do in order to keep ourselves alive - we don't give up either...and I am proud of you for doing the photoshoot!  My efforts are mainly in the stage iv realm - the scars, the pain, the rollercoaster - but most importantly...we do still die despite the fact that we have never given up. 

Ride On!

LowRider

bambers88

Thanks! Although I did have a sheer scarf type thing covering my face, it definitely shows the scars. Let me see if I can post the image..

KristyAnn

Proud of you and its a gorgeous photo- scars and all!

SusieMTN

Good for you!  Well done!  We need to LOVE these bodies of ours, after all they got us thru treatment, they have been thru so MUCH!  Love that you are doing this!

bambers88

My surgery was a month ago tomorrow. I think because I was so startled  when they took the surgitape off, I was expecting Frankenstein or much more gruesome than it actually was anyway, that somehow I felt better about it from the get go. I didn't even think I was going to be able to look down at all, I was so terrified. We took the photo about 10 days ago and at that point I'd had two fills. Of all the women that I know and have shown them in real time, ALL of them we're expecting much worse too.

The gal who took the picture put together a stunning display of 7 or 8 pieces of various people and their scars that we go to great lengths to hide. Nothing was as beautiful as the 7 or 8 of us up on that wall. A 2 inch wide scar from neck to tail bone from scoliosis, a skin graft, a burn, a c-section AND appendectomy scar on the same belly, every one of them spoke volumes. It was a very powerful exhibit. I'm kinda bummed today is the last day. I sooooo wish I could have been a fly on the wall to hear what the people were whispering as they stood in front of each. All in all, I'm glad I did it.  

barbe1958

That means your scar was 20 days old at the photo shoot! Wow! You healed well!

My torso scars make grown doctors weep:

Thyroid scar at base of neck

Double mastectomy

2 previous breast biopsies scars still show on chest

Pyloric stenosis scar running down right side of abdomen

Laparoscopy scar at belly button

Laparotomy for ovarectomy running horizontally

Hysterectomy scar runs vertically to join the above scar

Add stretch marks from 60 pounds gained at pregnancy and I'm a REAL mess! 

LRM216

Your photo is mind-blowing and such a tribute to yourself and all of us too.  thank you.

bambers88

Girls! I think Lowrider54 is on to something. I say we all get together for that calander shoot, Barbe1958 on the cover. Wouldn't that be something! I bet we'd give Playgirls a run for their money..

Joviangeldeb

Clapping and a standing ovation, here.   Beautiful and touching photo.

barbe1958

Hang on though.... MY mastectomy scars run from my back right across to the centre of my chest where there is a ONE inch gap before the next scar starts and then continues to around my back!

bambers88

Had we been born with our scars, physical and emotional, we wouldn't know what it is to suffer, in whatever capacity. Cancer gives us and teaches us so many things we might not have ever known. Faith, courage, generosity, aspiration, patience, sympathy, kindness, forgiveness, humility. I'm not the same person I was a month ago. And looking back at it, I don't want the old me back. We all have suffered in our own ways but we grow from it, make progress from it, become better people.

karen1956

Bamber...the pic is beautiful.....

Bugs

What a beautiful picture!

diana50

Beautfiul picture. yes...i am ready to do a calendar**

kittycat

I'm surprised they would cringe.  You look great! 

echosalvaje

Beautiful photo...isn't it interesting how we adapt to such changes? I too have been photographed for an art project. There is an artist that was commissioned to create artwork for a woman that wanted her mastectomy scars tattooed. This artist is known for her beautiful pen and ink and watercolor botanical drawings. She does these amazing vines with flowers etc. After she did the template for the tattoo artist that then replicated the drawings on the woman with the scars, she was inspired to do a whole series of work focused on women that had had breast cancer surgeries. She applied for a grant from the Guggenheim Foundation and has photographed 12 women with different surgical scars from breast cancer. They are big, like larger than full sized images that she then has drawn and painted these beautiful botanical works upon.

When I met her she wanted to use my torso because the other models she had so far had single mastectomies or lumpectomy. I had just finished chemo and radiation and bilateral mastectomy. This gave her a "canvas" filled with gaping scars, the lump from my port and totally fried bubbled skin....she loved it!  WHO KNEW, I would become a "model" after such destruction!!! We had a lot of fun doing the shoot. I have not seen the finished product, but look forward to what comes out from it. I think the opening presentation will be sometime in the fall and I hope to be able to go....just to see how it is all received.

bambers88

I'm no professional, but a decent amature photographer... and all you peeps have got my wheels turning with ideas! Now if I could just remember what they were... LOL , good ol' chemobrain, count on it being there when you need it most..

apple

that's really neat.

thank you

maryannecb

Cool!

jenn3

Absolutely beautiful!!!!  I love the photo and what it represents.  Bravo!!!!!!

Our cancer center has a book of art work, oil/water paint and photos of pictures created by men and women going through cancer (proceeds to fund cancer research), it represents their feelings at the time or photos of themselves.  Two stood out to me and I have found myself just staring at them every time I am at an appt and pick up the book.  One is of a woman from the lower torso to her neck showing her "new" look - masectomy scars and the other is of a woman looking over a pair of sunglasses with the most interesting look in her eyes - she is bald in the picture.  When I look at these pictures I see beautiful strong women. 

A calendar shoot would be interesting......something showing the real side of cancer.

Jenniferz

That is a wonderful photo, and you are an amazing woman! I also like the idea of a calendar...especially since I won't be in it!! I'd break the camera with my scars!



Jennifer

cathmg

Kudos on your bravery and willingness to educate others. Darn good reconstruction, too!!!!

Catherine

MRDRN

Just pouring over everything I can find before my upcoming surgery.  A picture is worth a thousand words, and this one (for me at this time) is priceless.

Well done and thanks for sharing.

cookiegal

wow cool!

PauldingMom

Bravo!! Well done.