thread for middle age to older Christian women.

zjrosenthal

Am I the only one here having a hard time getting back to the land of the living? The life I had before cancer doesn't exist anymore and I feel very lost. I don't know if it's the AI or just everything I've been through but I find myself crying very easily lately. I do read your posts and pray for you ladies as I read every day. I thank God for this thread for I feel very isolated. Love, Jean

Teka

Jean,

This has been an ongoing discussion with many members on the threads. I now think of my once normal life as my somewhat normal life. I had last TNBC treatment during March 2011. I suffered from chemo brain, but during the Summer was once again blessed with the joy of reading novels. I read 1 novel during June then 8 novels during July and August.

Hugs!

Kindergarten

Dearest Jean!! You have so much on your plate!! Feeling sad is normal!! Our Lord does not want you to suffer!! It is OK to seek help!! There are many Christian Psychologists out there!!

Faith-840

Dear Jean, I think so much of what you're feeling is very normal but I also think that the Femara definetly affects your moods and leads to depression. I've just been reading another thread about feeling depressed from the AI's and many women say that taking an antidepressant has made a big difference in their lives. There is nothing wrong with getting some help from medication. God does not want us to suffer. It might be time to talk to your doctor about this.

However, after saying all this, I do think we suffer from PTSD and various stages of grief also. There is life after cancer but it's a new normal. I'm still struggling with living this cancer life once again after it came back again and some days are really hard but then I believe the prayers of so many others help pull me through those days. We sang a song in church today called "Jesus, You brought me all the way". I believe it was so uplifting for the whole congregation but it especially spoke to my heart.

I am praying that you find what you need to get through this tough time.

Faith (in the future)

bandwoman1234

Dear ladies,

I finally have my laptop back. I had a document I had been working for hours on and I thought it was backed up and it wasn't so there were some stressful times this weekend not knowing what was going to happen. My documents are intake and my computer is working praise God.

Jean, I have been through some really down days recently. I have been pulled in a milliion different directions with family, friends, my own regulating my thyroid meds, my cancer AI and my computer problems. These days took me totally by surprise as I have had many things to celebrate lately which I will share one of those things possibly later. I agree with those who have already said that we have to transition into a new normal. Those of us taking pills it is a daily reminder, those who are in active treatment and ongoing treatment certainly always have cancer in the forefront of their brains and emotions. I know for myself that I have to be intentional about being close to the Lord. It is a daily and sometimes hourly thing that keeps me protected and on track. If your situation requires some medical intervention I think you will know that if and when it happens or maybe you are feeling that now there is. There is certainly nothing wrong with getting some intervention if you need it.

Continued prayers for Joanne's granddaughter who had the remainder of her thyroid removed today. Pray for Joanne and her family as they are going through such a hard time right now. Pray protection over the children involved as well.

Also continued prayers for this family in Angie's church who have suffered great loss.

Have a good evening dear ladies. Know I am praying for you.

Love,

Nancy

Kindergarten

Nancy, you have had a lot on your plate as well!! Thank you for keeping track of all of us!! So many trials and storms!! God is in control and gets us through them🙏

Lita57

Jean, I share your pain and despondency. I heard a character on the TV show "Fear the Walking Dead" make this comment last night:

"You'll never be the same. Then one morning you'll start thinking like someone new. Someone you don't know yet...the person who comes after."

This was said by the character named Strand, episode entitled, "Pablo and Jessica." I played that segment back a couple of times so I could write it verbatim. It just made me cry.

Thinking about this in terms of cancer, I'm not the same Lita anymore, and I never will be. Having been dx'd with Stage IV cancer 5 mos. ago, I'm a shadow of what I once was (my face is drawn and I've lost over 30 pounds). I'm trying to figure out who I am now, and navigate thru this nightmare. I haven't started thinking like someone new yet. I don't know how much more time God will grant me w/my family and friends down here on Earth, so, in a sense, I am already a dead woman walking, one of "The Walking Dead."

I try to stay positive and keep praying and staying grounded in the Word, but it's really hard. Our church is starting a support group just for cancer patients. I hope it will help.

Lita

Longtimesurvivor

Dear Jean- No you are not alone! And if each of our stories help you realize that I will share a bit of mine.. As a "longtime survivor" dealing with breast cancer since 1998, there have been numerous adjustments that I had to make or go through. Always while wondering if I'd be normal again. I think what I finally realized is that God is shaping me into something new that He can use and also for reasons only He knows. And I agree with others that continual deep sorrow should be addressed medically to assess whether an antidepressant is a good idea. Yet tears (I have realized for me) must come, break throughs can happen and "new normals" discovered, and the best way I can describe the process is submission and acceptance to His guiding hand trusting He knows best.

You have probably heard this song- what if your tears... It speaks to me often.

http://www.metrolyrics.com/blessings-lyrics-laura-...

Praying for you today Jean

Allison

bandwoman1234

I am praying for you dear ladies. More later.

Love,

Nancy

zjrosenthal

Ladies I'm really ok most of the time. I think I am just processing all that's happened in the last 2 years. It's like I been living on the cancer planet and am not sure how to come back to earth. I dont think the world has changed but I surely have. Glad I have Jesus. Love, Jean

Mini1

My sister has asked me to get BRCA 1/2 gene testing. I didn't get it when I was diagnosed. I didn't have a grand-daughter then but since I do now, I'm going ahead and getting it done. I know it doesn't really change anything, but I find myself nervous about it.

Like many of my sisters here, I go in and out of the page to keep up on requests and praises, but don't always comment. But out of sight is not out of mind. I think of you often, and pray that we all stay firm in God and feel his many blessings.

Blessings

bandwoman1234

Allison, thanks for posting that song. If you don't mind I am going to post a follow up from Laura Story who wrote and sung that song. She doesn't go into as much detail as I thought regarding her husbands health but the message is still powerful.

I think that even as Christians we still wrestle with pain and suffering. I like Laura's perspective because I think she is right on in what she says.

God bless you all and I am praying for you.

Love,

Nancy

Longtimesurvivor

Nancy- of course I don't mind!!

Whatever edifies the group!!

bandwoman1234

auroaya200882

Thank you Nancy, I needed that banner today.

Aurora

bandwoman1234

Dear ladies,

I know that so many are going through such very difficult times and you know I am praying for you. I don't want to be insensitive but I think we could use some good news for a change. I want to share some good things that have happened for me in the last couple of months with my photography. My newspaper which covers a large section of suburban Chicago has a weekly photo contest and they select three pictures to put in the newspaper each week. They then select a monthly winner in which the winner is interviewed by the newspaper and an article is printed with their winning photo. I have had three pictures in the paper since July and the last picture of the dragonfly was the monthly winner for August. The article just came out in the paper today and I was so pleased that this journalist included the important things that I said. I made it clear that I was a person of faith and I believe God put me on this journey of photography as a gift while I was in rads. It started with my swan family photo winning exactly two years ago for the August winner and now two years later I have won again. I am praising God for what he has done and is doing. I am going to include my pictures that made it into the paper in July and August. The last picture is the winning photo for August. I did win some money to use at a camera shop. Whoohoooooooooo!

Love,

Nancy

bandwoman1234

I wanted to share that Joanne's granddaughter came through her surgery well and is doing fine. Please keep your prayers going for the kids that are involved in this ugly court case. Please continue to pray for protection for them as half the time they are now with this very ungodly and evil man who is brainwashing them that there is no God and praying is a waste of time. Joanne will have a chance to give her input in this legal matter and knowing her they had better watch out! I am praying that she will speak with force and truth and that her testimony will carry a lot of weight to get the children back with their mom.

The last I heard from G she had got her drains out and was doing well. I am continuing to pray that she has a complete recovery with no setbacks.

I continue to pray for the very serious needs of our ladies. Some are in such dire straights financially as well as physically and I pray that the Lord will come by their side and show Himself strong on their behalf.

Love,

Nancy

Kindergarten

Congratulations, Nancy! You are so deserving!! Beautiful pictures!! Our Lord had given you a skill and talent that brings joy to others!!

Faith-840

Congratulations Nancy, you have a wonderful God given talent,,your pictures are beautiful! Your banners are inspiring! I believe we are all uplifted by good news of any kind. I continue to pray for everyone's needs here that God will give us all the strength and hope we need to get through these trying times.

Faith (in the future)

mysunshine48

Hello all. Congratulations, Nancy. Beautiful pictures!

Jean, you are not alone. I am trying to live a "normal" life with what is the new normal, which only we can understand. Life never goes back to pre cancer. I was having some depression and crying spells and went on Lexapro...10 mg. a day. It is a small dose and I do feel better.

I had a scare recently with an enlarged lymph node, but my oncologist thinks it is a reaction and infection from mosquito bites. Scary because of Zika too and I live in Florida. I am on antibiotics and aside from being tired more than usual, the node is going down. I hope I get better as am supposed to leave on a trip in less than two weeks.

I read but do not post every few days and pray for all of you. We are all dealing with individual problems, medical and financial issues and I pray to our precious Lord to give us the help and guidance we need. We have to put our faith and trust in Him.

I am still dealing with a $9,000 + medical bill from February, 2015 that insurance would not pay. But, I thank God so many times each day for all I have in so many ways, and know that this issue will get resolved. I am blessed and look at things and the world in such a different way now.

Wish I could give you all a big hug and tell you in person how special each one of you are.

Have a restful night.

Lynn

bandwoman1234

Thank you Kathy, Faith and Lynn. It has been a crazy day and still dealing with insomnia but feeling so grateful in this second chapter of my life.

Kathy, do you have your condo on the market or are you in the initial stages of getting organized. Praying that you can sell quickly when you need to.

Lynn, glad to hear from you and glad the lymph node was nothing to be worried about. I just started on Medicare a few weeks ago so I am waiting to see what fun I am in for! Hopefully your bill will be paid.

Faith, did you get all of your dental work out of the way now? Praying for you for strength in your ongoing treatments.

Have a good night dear ladies. I pray for all of you regularly and by name. I know there are some great prayer warriors here and I know we all need it. Our collective issues can seem mind boggling at to our human minds they are but God is a big God with a plan for each one of us. We must trust in that and not go by sight because we all know that we have very limited vision. God will let us know His plan in His timing and not ours. We have to trust in that timing and I know that is the very difficult part.

Have a good night's rest dear ladies.

Love

Nancy

Kindergarten

Nancy, aww, you are always thinking of others, would love to give you a hug in person!! Our condo here is up for sale, and we are in the process of closing on our condo in Palm Desert! Our Boise gang is visiting us next week!!

Lynn, so glad your lymph node was a benign issue!! Prayers for safe travel on your trip!!!

Faith, thank you for your prayers!!

bandwoman1234

Kathy, praying that the sale goes quickly. I am sure you will have a great time with family coming in.

Have a great day ladies. I am praying for you. May God be your refuge and strength this day.

Love,

Nancy

zjrosenthal

Ok thanks Nancy for the admonition to provide good news. I have done quite enough whining here lately. FIrst of all I am very grateful that my daughter was transferred back to teaching in the middle school. She is glad to be back there where she belongs. My hubby and I are making great progress in learning to cope with our health problems and encourage each other. God is using this time to grow us closer to Him and to each other. I am getting a little stronger each day and am beginning to think my health issues are resolved for now rather than waiting for the next crisis. We both saw an orthopedist this week and I will not need surgery on my knee. Hubby had a shot that seems to have healed his hip pain. My granddaughter Alexia is still on the wait list for rehab. It is a lovely cool and sunny day so I'm going to take a walk outside with no cane and no pain! Praise and glory to my Savior Jesus. King of kings and Lord of lords, Lion of the tribe of Judah, Rose of sharon, Lilly of the valley and the Bright morning star. He is truly amazing wonderful. Love, Jean

zjrosenthal

Nancy, I am just an amateur but thought this might en courage someone here today. Here are some pictures from my 2 mile walk in our local park. What a blessing to have this beauty so close to home. Love, Jean

Kindergarten

wow, beautiful pictures, Jean!

Faith-840

Jean, what great pictures! There is some thing very uplifting about being able to walk outside on a beautiful day. It really helps to lift the clouds.

Nancy, thank you for always remembering the problems we are dealing with, such as my tooth thing. I hope to be able to finish up on Monday when the dentist puts the final fix on the crown that was drilled through and get an overdue cleaning. Right now, I have a sore throat and mouth sores so I hope that's gone by then.

I'm so sorry you are dealing with insomnia, that can be so depressing. My DH has it and I'm worried he is becoming seriously depressed and all my encouragement for him to get some help is falling on deaf ears.

I do have some good news to share. One of our grandsons has aspergers and social interaction is not one of his strong skills. He is a soph. in college and we had to pick him up after class today (since he still refuses to drive) and it was like a new person got into the car. He is usually very quiet but today he was very engaged and talkative about his history profs. in the middle eastern studies classes and also about the mandarine class he is taking. If you know anything about kids with aspergers, you know why. I'm thanking God tonight.

I pray everyone has a pain free and very good nights sleep tonight. God is good, all the time God is good.

Faith (in the future)

Kindergarten

Faith, that is so uplifting about your grandson!

Faith-840

Kathy, thank you so much for appreciating how wonderful it can be for us to have that interaction with our grandson. It is a very rare thing with this child. We are so blessed with 10 great grandkids and being able to connect with him has always been a worry for me. Prayers do work!

Have a wonderful weekend and I hope that everyone has as an uplifting service to attend to praise our good God. I'm really looking forward to ours tomorrow as we are blessed to have an occasional artist in residence with us. Her name is Jeanne Cotter and she writes, sings and plays such wonderful Christian music. She has some things on YouTube if anyone is interested in hearing her message.

Peace to all,

Faith (in the future)

Faith-840

Jo-5, I also want to thank those who pray for me and to share something I heard at Mass today. "If the devil can't make us bad, he keeps us busy". There's a lot of food for thought in those words. It's so important to take time everyday to thank and praise God and find a few minutes to listen and just be with God.

May God bless you all.

Faith (in the future