March 2010 Chemo Start

elen

Haven't checked in in a LONG time.  Almost one year post-chemo .. wow time flies ..  Getting ready to move to Shelbyville IN from Florida. Anyone familiar with any cancer dr's up there?

hereandnow

congratulations on your year milestone Elen. Good luck with your move.

Hope everyone is well and doing ok. Our summer feels like it was all too brief, and the Autumn chill has started, fire is going and ugg boots on. Which means for you girls, spring is on it's way - enjoy.

badger

hi elen, good luck with the move and congrats on a year out.

taty, hope it went well with your PS - did you decide on surgery yet?

Lisa, you have end-of-summer chill and we have end-of-winter chill.

Must be warm somewhere LOL! 

{{hugs}} to all.

Yeshua4Me

Badger: Exchange is March 30. I dreamt about it last night. I thought that was odd. I guess it's been on my mind.

Friday I had my onc. app. and was told there is no trace of cancer! So far so good. Because I have that damn cancer gene (BRACA 2) I'm tested every 3 months. My cancer is known for coming back (if it's going to) within 2-3 years. If all tests are clean after the time period then I will be considered a breast cancer survivor. But to tell the truth, I already feel like a survivor. A year ago at this time I had just had a double mastectomy and starting chemo and I'm still here! What a ride.

Charlie: My hair isn't growing very fast either. I never wore a wig (I'm rebellious) and went "naked up top" almost daily while going thru chemo. Anyway, when I saw the dr. last Friday the first words out of his mouth were, "Wow! You don't need a perm!" You see, my hair has millions of tightly woven curls all over my head. Much like the back end of a poodle. I replied to my dr. with, "The first thing out of your mouth should be whether or not the cancer came back and then you may comment on the hair." I don't mean to sound ungrateful for the hair but I hate it when every 65 or older woman stops me and comments on how great my hair is. I want to scream, "Of course it's great for a woman over the age of 60!" (I'm in my 40's) But I don't. I just smile and say, "Thanks."

hmh23

Hello to everyone in this wonderful group of women!  I've been absent from the discussion boards for toooo long.  I guess in some ways that's a good thing that we don't feel that we need to be here daily but then again,  I have to say that I miss your kind words of encouragement and of course, the humor we have all shared.

Lise;  Your meltdown wasn't anything that I don't think we haven't all experienced so forget about it.  I think we all need to let off steam at times and god knows I've done it.

Charley;  I took my wig off in November and believe me, I didn't have much hair at all.  Mine has been growing very slowly as well but boy it feels good not to have to put Wanda on everyday.  Just go for it!!!  Your gorgeous face will detract from your short hair.

Frosty;  Congrats on getting your port out finally. 

Well, I saw my PS and he is going to build two boobs out of my tummy.  I'm thrilled.  From what I gather it is a difficult surgery but then again, I don't think it can get much worse than we we've all been through.  I'm not doing it until August so I can sit back and enjoy the summer a bit.  I was away in Charleston this past week and golfed for the first time in 18 months.  I had a blast and played my best golf yet.  I guess have only one boob is a good thing for golf.

Anyhow, I hope this post finds all of you well.  Take good care. Fondly, Heather

horsedoc

Hi everyone, I've also been absent for awhile but decided to come back and "visit".  Heather, good luck with your surgery; I know a couple people (close friends) who have had that and they are extremely happy with the end results.  Obviously  the recovery is a little longer than the more "simple" surgeries but now I'm almost wishing I had it done!

Has anyone else had a major weight issue since chemo? In the past 14 months (which is when my saga started) I have gained 50 lbs.  I have always had to struggle with my weight but before my surgery and chemo (which incidentally coicided exactly with when I started a new job and moved to a new area) I was working out regularly, attending weight watchers, and had a personal trainer.  Now my finances are so bad I can't have a trainer, there is no weight watchers center here and I don't have the discipline to do it on my own, but I have joined a gym (the YMCA is reasonably priced) and things are going better. 

I'm sorry everyone's hair isn't growing too fast.  Mine was slow at first but then got thick and curly and was getting out of control around December.  I didn't want to cut it at first.  Yeshua I hear ya!!!!  People (usually older women) loved it, but I was like "I'm 38!!!! It's old lady hair!"  (profuse apologies to those who will be offended by that; I'm just tired of looking older than I am.)  Then I realized I was starting to look like Mike Brady from the Brady Bunch.  Or I said you could color it orange and it would be perfect clown hair.  Or Richard Simmons hair. (minus the receding hairline.)  So I got it cut short on the sides; it cut off the curls and matches my face shape better.  So I'm happy about that!  And finally I got a compliment the other day from a client that said I didn't look old enough to have been practicing vet med for almost 10 years.  Finally.  I was feeling like an old maid.

 Is anyone growing their hair out long again?  I want to in a way but it looked so ridiculous I couldn't take it. 

hereandnow

Yesh, congrats on your onc visit. What are your final plans for recon? I see my BS this Friday for my 12 month visit, and then I'll have to see PS to plan mine. Good luck for the 30th. I found colouring my hair made a huge difference for me. And Heather, first, great you had a game of golf. I played on the week-end, and it's such a lovely "exercise" - I play the same with one boob as I did with 2, sometimes I'm hitting well, and get par, then next hole, whack, on the next fairway, LOL, it's fun. I may eventually get a DIEP, if I decide that lefty's got to go for peace of mind or there's the slightest suspicion of anything. Until then, I'm getting a gummy on the right. I just want to be able to answer the door in a teeshirt when the pizza guy arrives, without worrying about asymmetry. Horsedoc, great to hear from you, so many images of your hair as it was growing, Richard Simmons? ha. Charley and Heather, I'm sure yours will fill out when it's good and ready. Horsedoc, I've put on 10kg -all in my belly, I have a pot now, and I am determined that eventually I'll get back where I was - but in the meantime, I'm loving every meal, and enjoying my food  and going to the gym, trying to tweek the energy balance. Let me know if you come up with any secrets. I'm sure it takes time for our bodies to adjust to the chemopause and hormonal adjustments.

hereandnow

PS Happy International Womens Day to the strongest women I know. xx

Yeshua4Me

Hereandnow: On March 30th I go in to have my tissue expanders removed and my permanent implants put in. I'm excited because these tissue expanders are as hard as rocks. There is absolutely no give. If I happen to bang into the side of a door jam (I have no feeling or sensation) I bounce away; that's the only indication that I've ran into something! My PS told me that my new implants will feel very real. I hope so. I also think I'm not going to get nipples. I like not ever having to wearing a bra. Only had cancer in left breast but had the right removed also. Gave me piece of mind to a certain extent. Am hoping this exchange of expanders won't be too painful. I've finally, just recently, began feeling good. My muscle and bone pain are almost completely gone; still lingering in my hands and fingers. I'm not on pain pills any longer either. Stopped those 2 weeks ago. Stopped sleeping pills and muscle relaxers also. I now only take Motrin when my fingers hurt. But I'm trying to put on a brave face with this upcoming surgery and act like it's no big deal. We'll see I guess although Charlie made me feel a bit relieved after talking about her surgery.

badger

well ladies, one year ago today was my first infusion.   How far we have come.

hey horsedoc, good to see you!  I've had a heckuva time with my weight.  Used to be, I needed to lose 10-12 pounds, now it's more like 25-30.  I chalk it up to tamoxifen.  Still walking every day and trying to eat healthy.  But, like Lisa said, I enjoy my life and that includes good food (and a nice glass of wine) so it's coming off so slooooowly.

I will keep my hair short (but not this short).  Should've cut it years ago! 

{{hugs}} to all

Charley

Yeshua4me - Woohoo! Glad you are finally getting rid of the expanders!  You will be so much more comfortable.  The exchange is a piece of cake compared to the mastectomies although it seems like I was told the recovery time is similar.  The feeling in my foobs is coming back. When I had my tattoos done the PS. gave me some lidocaine to numb my skin ... needed it on one side but not the other.  He said feeling would come back little by little.

I am dieting to get rid of the extra I gained but I too am not denying myself too much.  Life's too short! So the weight is coming off ever so slowly.

hereandnow

Hi girls, 12 months ago today I started chemo. I look at everything around me now, and think back to how I felt at this time last year. The capsicums are growing well again,the white cabbage moth is eating my pac choy, again.  I still have to do my PhD confirmation LOL (now that's groundhog day for you Badger Although I still have the occasional low day, the vast majority are good, my energy is so much improved and I feel grateful for now. We've come a long way.

Hope you are all feeling well, hugs to you all   Lxxx

carolsue63

Hello ladies -- long time no see!

One year ago today was my first chemo treatment. Last Friday (3/11) was my last Herceptin treatment. YAHOOOOO!!!!!

I had a little bit of a scare a few weeks ago, when my onc PA felt a lump near the end of my incision. Breast surgeon aspirated it and they're calling it fat necrosis. They didn't find any cancer cells, but because there were some "atypical" cells, they're going to excise the tissue and do a biopsy just to be on the safe side. The surgeon said he could do it with just a local, but since I'm such a wuss, he's going to do IV sedation. And he's going to take out my port at the same time. Another big YAHOOOOOO!!!  Can hardly wait til Friday!

 Happy chemo anniversary to all of you!

badger

Hi carolsue, congrats and a big WAHOO!

Lisa, congrats 2u2 and LOL at GH day!

Warmer but windy today.  Took a nice long walk and felt the wind in my hair.  Remembered back a year ago, when I was 2 weeks post-first chemo, my hair coming off my head and floating away like dandelion fluff when I was walking in a spritely spring breeze.  My hair and I are a lot tougher today!  {{hugs}} to all

frosty1

Lots of milestones this month ... it is hard to think about one year ago and how far we have all come.  And the hurdles that some of you are still facing.  I got over my caution about not seeing my onc doc every 3 weeks when I realized the 'date' had passed and I hadn't even thought about it.  Going a full year of chemo was not fun and I'm certainly glad it is over.

Now facing the new me conundrum ... realized that I hate my 'new' hair because it is not the me that was a year ago.  So coming to grips with the poodle hair and the black/gray look.  Ugh.

Yeshua4Me

Today is my 1 year anniversary of my first chemo. Also had my pre-op appointment today for exchange surgery I'm having next week. I didn't realize today was my anniversary until I was speaking with the doctor.

Wow--time passes so quickly.

hereandnow

huzzah,

despite my promise not to drink and post again - I just needed to let you know, I passed my confirmation of PhD!!

I got about 15 questions at the end, I was able to come up with cogent responses, so, despite chemo, despite tamoxifen and its effects on sleep, and despite a degree of PTSD, we will prevail. If I can do it, anyone can,

Love to you all,

good luck yesh with next week,

Lise xxx

Yeshua4Me

Lisa: Congratulations!!!! Well done girl. That is quite an accomplishment. You should know by now that nothin' can keep us girls down for long! Very proud of you.

badger

That's GREAT news ~ congratulations Dr. Lisa ~ so proud of you!!

Yeshua4Me, good luck this Weds the 30th, will be thinking of you.  (IOU a PM)

frosty, I actually like my poodle hair, it has body and wave.  My pre-chemo hair was baby fine and stick straight.  I had already let nature take its course and gone gray, and loved discovering the intriguing thatch of dark hair at the nape of my neck, exposed by a locks of love bob and confirmed by subsequent re-growth.  and BTW, you look marvellous! 

Hope this finds everyone safe and well.  {{hugs}} to all

hereandnow

Oh god, I wish it was finished, I've still got at least 18mths to go. This is one of the formal academic hurdles we have for PhD here, and I'm so glad to be able to move on now. I won't be a Dr squared for a while yet

and re: poodle hair, I'm letting mine grow, it shows no sign of going back to the dead straight hair it was before. I have to use oil in it because otherwise I don't know how to do this new hair yet.

frosty1

The new hair is a challenge ... I just don't know how to manage or style poodle hair, but I"m learning.  I'm just happy to have hair!  A year ago, I was finishing up my 2nd round of chemo and had aching hair follicles.

Lisa -- that is awesome.  In spite of the year you had, you made it through the first big hurdle.  Congrats!  A toast to you from the west coast!

Yesh - I'm jealous of your exchange.  I haven't decided what I want to do yet.  I just decided to focus on losing all my extra weight and then I think I'll go from there. 

horsedoc

Poodle hair!  Great description!  My poodle hair is gone.  I had it cut short.  And I just realized a couple weeks ago that the really soft hair that grew in after chemo is gone and it's back to the coarse hair I had before.  I'm so happy to be getting back to normal though!  Except for the ovaries.  They are still on strike. 

As I was writing the date today I kept thinking there was something about it... then I finally realized that my first chemo was exactly a year ago!  (Like so many others here having an anniversary.)  I'm so glad to have that behind me now.

Congrats Lise! Very exciting!

Charley

Congrats Lisa! What an accomplishment.  Yes, I think we can do anything we put our minds to despite having gone through chemo and taking these funky meds! 

I celebrated my one year anniversary on 3/11. I'm not feeling much like a cancer victim anymore.  People ask less and less the polite 'how are yous'. I gave away the pink lanyard I faithfully carried all year. Just don't need it anymore.  Perspective has certainly changed - I don't get caught up in all those silly little office dramas, the house doesn't have to be spotless,  I take the time to just hang out and play with my dogs and talk to my kids. Yes, life is good.

((Hugs))  Charley

hereandnow

Thinking of you Yesh, hugs and warm thoughts today, let us know how it goes.

xx

Yeshua4Me

Thanks Lisa. I'm leaving for the hospital now. Will post when I can.

Kayne

Been away for awhile-  having  fun with my daughter and her college letters, buying prom gown and yes, being asked to the prom.  I'm enjoying watching her through her last months of High School.  No decision on college yet! 

I turned 50 on Feb 5, and was sick and had to cancel my little party.  We celebrated the next week, which was the 1yr anniv. of my BMX.  Funny how things work out, so I had 2 Cosmos to celebrate each milestone.  My first in over a year! 

I've been getting filled on my left side again.  Doesnt' hurt as much as the first time.  Surgery is scheduled for May 9th for my exchange!!

Yes- thinking of you today!

Lisa- congrats!  I can't imagine accomplishing something so important at this point.  Way to go!

So happy to hear of everyone in a positive way!

Last night my son Gregory, 16, had to give a presentation about someone he admires.  He had written his report about Drew Brees, the quarterback of the New Orleans Saints.  He changed his power-point presentation to Me!  I was so surprised and very honored.  He cried through the whole presentation. (we all did). But it was very nice.  He talked about the past year and all I had been through, etc.  He had a picture of me with my mohawk.    I felt so bad that he was so emotional, but I think it was good for him to let it out.  He is so sweet. 

Have a good night (sleep) everyone!!

Michelle

Yeshua4Me

Hello everyone. Well, I did it. The surgery is over. I'm home now. Surgery was 3 hours and was out-patient. No hospital stay this time.

It hurts but not as bad as mastectomy. This was an exchange of tissue expanders to implants. I am bound very tightly but when I move to get up off of the bed I can actually feel my new breasts jiggle. It's true and it hurts but I'll take the pain just to get rid of those "hard rocks" I had with the expanders.

I'm pretty drugged up but wanted to let you all know that I'm fine and just about at the end of my journey. Tattoos next. I'm ready!

badger

Yeshua4Me ~ congratulations!! on your exchange and thanks for checking in.

Michelle ~ Happy 50th Birthday (belated) and welcome to the new age bracket.  :-)

Charley ~ I'm with you, don't sweat the small stuff, and more stuff seems minor now.

Lisa ~ doctor or not, I'm still so very proud of you!

And to my sisters here, on this last day of March 2011 ~ it's been one hell of a year! 

Thanks for helping me through it.  {{hugs}} to all

staceyt

Hello Ladies,

I, like many have not been on the boards, but I have been reading every ones 1 year accomplishments, Congrats to all of us.  Michelle I cried when I read your post (btw Happy belated B-Day) what a fabulous son you have, you have raised a great boy.  I'm sure that those of you who are mothers have children who admire you and they should this was not an easy year for anyone in the family, but without them it would have been even harder. 

I am so sorry to hear that people are having problems with their poodle hair.  I, for one, am not because I had it before chemo and was hoping that it would come back in curly.  It is so much easier to take care of.  I have heard that after a few cuts your hair goes back to the way it was, so maybe there is a glimmer of hope. 

 I am so ready for winter to be over and have been counting the days before I set sail on my cruise (36 days).  Of course like some of you, I also have gained the pounds.  Between the tamox and menopause my hormones are just fighting it out in there, but I'm not sweating the small stuff like Charley, I'm still sweating with the power surges though.

Lise congrats and to anyone else that has reached a milestone through all of this.  I wish everyone a Happy Spring (those who are headed into it) and make sure that you take the time to stop and smell the flowers!

Love and hugs to all - Stacey

hereandnow

I have tears about gregory and his talk. Blessings to you both.

Yay yesh, I hope it all settles down ok, and you are comfortable soon..

Badger my sweet friend, I'm already a bloody doctor, if it hasn't filtered through with our correspondence, I was trying to be subtle over the last year, for your sakes, and mine. you didn't need someone giving too much advice, and I needed to be a patient.

But if I'm able to persevere over the next 18 months then I'll be a doctor doctor. I do miss my clinical work, but I am happy that my brain is working again.

hugs xx