Is it the A or the C?

Lifeisbeautiful

Is it the A or the C?

Lifeisbeautiful

Hello again!  

I started my chemo on the 8th and it was everything I expected and yet nothing I expected.  Three or four days of my life just gone.  I slept mostly because it was all I COULD do.  My husband was pulling his hair out.  He compared me to a shell and was afraid I'd never come out of it.  Girls, I had nightmares.  One in particular I was lost in blowing white sand and I was begging for someone to find me.  I could hear people in the distance but they couldn't hear me.  Now I'm nursing a UTI and lower back pain as residual effects.  I'm even scared of taking the antibiotics - but I am.  I don't feel there's a choice with this burning.  Kidding you not I burn from front to back.  My GOD this stuff is wicked.  I had my Neulasta the day after my chemo and oddly, no effects from that.  Well, none that I was able to notice anyway.  I think my knees actually felt better - no pain climbing the stairs.  I'm an odd duck.

My question is - who's the culprit in all that horror?  The red devil or the cytox?  My nurse keeps telling me "oh, it sounds like you did really good"!  Yeah, I know that pep talk crap and I know what my body was saying.  I'm no weak individual and I swear I would have rather been in pain than feeling and experiencing what I did.  I know there's women out there that handle the AC fine and God bless you big time!  I don't want to discourage anyone else either because I KNOW we're all different and it affects each of us differently.  

Blessings to all of you on your journeys. 

GryffinSong

I was told it was the adriamycin that kicked my butt. It put me in the hospital twice, for several days at a time, with neutropenic fever. Basically, my immune system totally crashed.

Hugs and good luck! For what it's worth, if you have taxol later, it's not nearly so bad.

KerryMac

Yep, i just think they are all evil! But the good news is you got through it, and thats one less to do! Just keep plugging along, the only way to get to the end is by keeping on going.

Try and do something you enjoy on your "good" days!

clariceak

Sorry you're having a rough time.  I can relate.  I'm normally a tough person, commercially fished in Alaska for over 20 years and was up and walking around a day or two after masectomy.  But A/C knocked me down.

I tried to fight it but realized I needed to listen to my body.  For me, the first session was by far the worst.  You'll start to notice a pattern and you can be prepared for which days to lay low. It might help to think that you're feeling so knocked out because your cancer cells are taking a huge beating! 

Hang in there - you can do this.

Gitane

Hope I'm not pointing out the obvious here, but be sure your oncologist is giving you lots of fluids IV.  Before the infusion, of course, but also the next day when you go in for the neulasta injection get more fluids.  Then drink, drink, drink.

No doubt about it,  this stuff is "wicked" as you said.  I remember I slept like I never have before, and I also wept.  I am not a weapy person, but believe me, I was during treatment.  My onco nurse said it was the decadron highs and lows causing that.  I don't know, but it was an experience I won't forget.  

I think it's the adriamycin, but I don't know for sure.  I had AC so how could you separate it?  For me I became a bit weaker with each blast of treatment and my recovery was slow once treatment was done.  I was told this was normal, but I don't know.  I wasn't a bc.org poster in those days.  If I had known about this site, I sure would have been here comparing notes with others.

Giant hug for all you are going through.  Think of all of us in a circle around you sending warm, loving thoughts for strength and health.  

Hugs. 

apple

oh dear.. i'm sending a hug too.  That sounds awful

5andcounting

The Adriamycin scares me the most. My physician friends call it Big Red but they even have this reverential face when they say it. Big guns for a big solution. I call it friendly poison.Its kicking my butt too. I'm exhausted and have about 3 or 4 terrible days, then they get better.

Its worth the horror, it is a very effective treatment and will help me see my grandkids one day.

karen_in_nj

Yup, you're bringing back memories of chemo. WIll you only have three more doses of AC? It helps to count down. For me the Taxol was much, much easier. The nurse at my first infusion told me to drink as much water as I could after chemo and try to urinate as much as possible (including in the middle of the night). She also recommended using a squirt bottle with warm water after urinating. You might try that after the next round to help with the UTI.

kimber3006

Hang in there!  My first round of AC was truly horrible, but the next 3 were honestly far more managable.  I hope it goes the same for you.  I also got that UTI-type urgency/pain (though I never actually got one) whenever I didn't keep enough water going through me.  I drank water constantly before, during, and after - day and night - with the next 3 which I think helped a lot.  I've had a horrible time actually trying to sleep through this round, but when I did, DH would even wake me up periodically to drink more and go to the bathroom.  I just finished my last AC last week.  You'll be there soon! 

Leah_S

It sounds like you're having normal but difficult SE's. The chemo nurses where I had treatment always told us tht SE's were very individual. So ;whatever you're feeling, it's to be expected.

You might want to try drinking cranberry juice every day for the UTI's - it helps get rid of it & helps prevent new ones. I tried to drink it every day while I was on chemo and found it helped.

Best of luck.

Leah

jenn3

I just finished chemo 12/18 - did the AC first followed by Taxol.  The AC knocked me on my butt.  I had infections after each one and generally stayed in bed or on  the couch for several days after the infusion.  I was told it was the  Adrimycian, but who knows - it could be both.  Start keeping a log, you'll begin to notice a pattern and be able to make plans on the good days. Gitane is right and I may be saying something you already know too - be sure that you're hydrated, drink plenty water before, during and after chemo.  And....... check with the onconologist to be sure you're getting fluids during your infusion. And............ for the bad days here's a ((((HUG)))) , just rest and listen to your body.  It'll be over before you know it.

Kodapants

I think the nightmares are from the Predisone, on about day 2-3 I would loopy as all get out. I could not watch T.V. or read. I would just lay on my side in bed. I had chemo on Thurs about 3pm and I was back to work on Tues/ half there. You'll make it!!!

jenn3

Koda - You may be right about the steriods and the bad dreams - coming down from the steroid high was the worst - terrible dreams, night sweats, crying and in general just feeling terrible.

cherneski

YOU CAN DO THIS!  I did not have the same cocktail, but chemo kicked my arse something fierce!  I made it and you can too!  I cried more than ever before in my life.  It plain old sucked!  But I am here to tell you that I did it.  Of course your body doesnt like it.  It is poison.  But it is doing all the right things for you to make sure this devil is GONE.

Love you bunches Mamma!  Hang in there!  Remember the 2 things ...

Tell you Dr. EVERYTHING

and...

IT WONT LAST FOREVER!  

I promise.

Hugs

Anonymous

I was absolutely fine the first and second day, but then on the second day a few hours after the Neulasta shot I was miserable.  Exhausted and lot's of body aches and flu like feeling,  Also the beginninngs of mouth sores I rinsed with baking soda which helped to keep them from progressing.  Hang in there you'll do it.  I attributed  it all to the Neulasta, but it must have been the Red Devil kicking in that got me good.

Lifeisbeautiful

*found by the Deb*  haha

Yes, I get 4 rounds of the AC and then 4 Taxol.  I did really good the first 2 days but that third day hit me like a 1, 2 punch and I was out.  The next 3 days were a total blur and it seemed like all the days and nights ran together.  I remember forcing myself to shower every day because frankly, I couldn't stand the smell of myself.  (or anything else for that matter)  I didn't even want my husband to get close to me, it just made me feel more sick.  I drank a TON of water the day of my infusion and was already peeing red during my C infusion.  I walked the halls the entire time thinking I was doing myself a favor.  I even drove the 3 hours home!  Of course I was so hyped on the steroids I needed something to do for a distraction.  

Aloxi sounds familiar.  I know they injected me with a steroid and 2 anti nausea meds.  One was supposed to last 24 hours and the other was a longer lasting one.  I also took Emend.  I made the mistake of thinking I had it made because on day 2 I could still function.  LOL  Yeah.  Won't make that mistake again.

One thing I shouldn't have done (and thought I was doing right) was cutting my caffeine.  So, on top of all the other crap I was in withdrawal too.  My heart was pounding non stop at 100 which scared the crap out of me but the oncologist on call said it was most likely a combination of withdrawal, steroids and a lack of sugars and not the red devil since my heart rate was steady.  She told me to get off the water for a while and drink juices or clear sodas.  So, I sucked on Sprite with splashes of cranberry juice.  

Seriously, I begged my body not to give up on me.  I thought I was dying.  Not a doubt in my mind.

Thanks for the advice on the water bottle.  I'm prone to UTI's anyway and this certainly didn't help me in that department.  I am happy to report though that I finally have enough macrodantin in me that I've stopped burning CONSTANTLY.  lol  What a truck load of sh*t we have to endure!!!  On a happier note, my bone and CT scans were NED.  

(love you too Debbie) 

Claire_in_Seattle

Having just finished AC, I would say the Neulasta was as bad as either one.  Agree that Days 3-5 are the worst, but I can see I was one of the fortunate ones in that I was able to do most things including exercise.  However, not with much enthusiasm.  Wasn't exactly in a fog, but was seriously dragging.  Mornings were the worst.

Drinking enough liquid was no problem as really thirsty throughout this period.  And agree about the nasty sweat.  Talk about washing sheets.  Eeeeewwwwww!!!!

Off to take a bath right now as sweaty from my bicycle ride and one of my neighbors has clam soup for me.  Hoping Taxol is much kinder to my body.

I found the back end of AC cycle harder than the initial two infusions as my red cell counts were fine then.  But now that they are lower, yes I do lack my usual energy.  And as getting every two weeks, I never fully recover.

Yes, do get a water bottle with a SCREW TOP.  I tried using one of my cycling ones and ended up drowning my cell phone.  Well worth the investment to have a good one.

Brenda_R

It's the Adriamycin. It kicked my butt too. Unlike a previous poster, my se's got worse with each treatment. It has a cumulative effect. By #4, I begged the doc to give me less, and he did cut the dosage.

Also the first day or 2 after tx weren't too bad. It hit me on day 3 and stayed until about day 20. I just started feeling a little better and it was time for the next treatment. 

But just remember that all the se's mean it's killing those BC cells, and at a point, it will end, and you will recover. 

Billynda

Like you said, everyone is different!  With me, I couldn't see any patterns.  My SE's were different every single time, then at the end when I thought I was in the clear, BAM I got the worst case of bronchitis - I think because my immune system was non-existent by that point.  It wasn't easy but I got through it, too!  I just didn't expect anything out of myself for my chemo weeks either, and so if I felt good, great!  If not, well hey, it's to be expected when you get bags of poison (friendly poison is still poison:) pumped into your veins!  It's all about the lesser of 2 evils, right?

Diana63

Chemo was very hard on me too, I had 4 AC & 12 Taxols. I had an insurance glitch, so they sent me to a clinic. Not a problem or so I thought, because they didn't think I had Ins. they didn't give me my piggy back drugs. They changed it because I kept throwing up during chemo, then I found out why they didn't give it to me in the first place. Talk about mad, I was beside myself. You can get through this, and it will become a distant memory someday. As far as sleeping, thats exactly what your body needs right now. God Bless

EGAL

I had 4 AC's and then 4 Taxotere's.  I had an UTI after the first AC and it was miserable.  Someone told me to drink a lot, but I am not a drinker.  I tried my  best but still got the UTI.  I did better the next 3 AC's but the Taxotere's did me in.  The bone pain was incredible.  I did not work thru those chemo's or the 6 weeks of rads.  I went back to work until I just got laid off.  You'll do fine, just remember it will be over! 

Ellen