Um, I have a crush on my surgeon

Raili

Um, I have a crush on my surgeon

Raili

Okay, so here's a topic I have yet to see discussed in a breast cancer forum!!  Someone please tell me I'm not alone??

My surgeon is amazing, and pretty much everyone I've talked to who knows her agrees... OMG she is gorgeous (she's been referred to by patients, and patients' family members, etc as both a "rock star" and an "amazon"), and very talented - trained at a top notch cancer center, and has a reputation for being exceptionally good at communicating with patients (calls me at night, emails me at the crack of dawn and on weekends, etc), and she's so darn funny that I end up giggling my way through many of my appointments with her.  Having cancer sucks but I'm so grateful to have her to go through it with. 

It can be a really bizarre feeling, though, to be crushing on my doctor... I mean, I totally understand that it's a crush that will not/can not go anywhere, and I wouldn't really even WANT it to.  It's just something that adds a little sunshine to this crappy cancer journey!!  Having surgery sucks,but there's a part of me that's glad to be there spending time with her - that's kinda screwed up, isn't it??  I mean, if I had the option of magically becoming cancer-free and thus never seeing her again (never needing to), I would OF COURSE choose that option.  But since I DO have cancer and have no magic wand to wave to make that go away, I am super glad and grateful that she is my doctor.  We talk so easily and laugh together a surprising amount.  I think we are perfectly matched as doctor/patient.  YES as doctor/patient... I have no delusions of romance or even a friendship, much as I would love to be her friend.  I like it that not only is she extremely skilled at her job, but she's a person who makes my insides light up.  (Oh wait, it's the radioactive dye injection that does that... HA!)  

Has anyone else experienced this?  Does it worry you if you have a crush on your doctor?  For me I think it's a safe and fun crush...having cancer is not fun at all, so ya gotta hold onto the moments of joy wherever you find 'em.

Harley44

I also have a crush on my Surgeon... he is so nice, and I just LOVE HIM!!   After my biopsy, and my bilateral mast., I sent him a THANK YOU card... 

No, I realize that it could never go anywhere...  he's married, I'm married...  but he is the only dr. who REALLY seemed to care about me, throughout my tx... 

After my BMX, when I saw him at my follow ups, he would tell me jokes, and he always made me smile...   I started to tell him jokes, too...  

Maybe sometime, I'll tell you about what happened before my surgery...  it had everyone laughing...   

Harley

LRM216

Raili - I don't think it's unusual at all.  In fact, it's probably more common than people write about.  They are there for you completely in a way that no one else can be, and you are literally putting more trust in them and your life literally in their hands  - something you never do with anyone else in the same capacity.  I fell for my ob/gyn after giving birth to my second daughter and was totally besotted by him!  He also delivered my first daughter and I never felt that for him then - so go figure.  Fortunately for me, it never went anyplace as I was happily married - just couldn't get this guy out of my head for months and months.  And who knows, maybe you will have added a friend to your life forever because of this.  Just wanted to let you know - hey - you're not the only one to have ever felt this way.

Best always to you -

Linda

Raili

Thanks, Harley and Linda!  Linda, I think you're right that it's more common than people write about.  Surgeons/these doctors are our "knights in shining armor," and is it any wonder that we'd be swooning a bit??  I bet the doctors are used to it, too.

Harley, I'd love to hear the story of what had everyone laughing, if you feel comfortable posting it!  Or PM me if you want!

crazy4carrots

I know a specialist (not an onc) whose every patient has had a crush on him.  Why?  It's not because of his looks, it's because he makes every patient feel they are the most important, and he gives them the feeling that he really, really cares for them.  I once asked him why he chose his specialty (rheumatology) and he replied that when he was doing his intern rounds (this is 35 years ago, when newly graduated MDs did internships), he noted that the patients who invariably got short shrift were those with rheumatoid arthritis, lupus and the other arthritic autoimmune diseases. And the reason was that, in those days, there wasn't alot to do for these patients, other than to try to relieve their pain.  So that's why he chose rheumatology, and I suspect that there are many docs who choose oncology beause of the challenges involved.

And Madalyn's right -- look for an oncologist who makes you feel you are the most important patient on her roster, because (as far as you're concerned) you ARE.

Linda

foxyroxy2983

I had a crush on one of the radiology technicians because he was so cute and funny and my mom had a crush on my oncology nurse because he was really nice and sweet. Going to treatments aren't fun but knowing that your crushes are there makes going to treatments easier to deal with. Treatments made me feel crappy physically, but I still had an ear to ear smile after I was done with my appointments, hee hee hee .

beaglesmom

You girls are cracking me up.  I just came across this forum and am just sitting here giggling to myself.  Now, please keep in mind I am not laughing at you, I am laughing with you because I too have this warped little school girl crush on my ps.  A friend of mine told me that she presumes this happens quite often.  Afterall, they are there to fix us and make us whole again and we trust them with our bodies in a way we never thought we would.  I had one friend tell me that I should find mine on facebook and that "facebook stalking is perfectly acceptable"  HAHA

For those Grey's Anatomy lovers out there, my doctor is now known to me and my girlfriends (not hubby) as Dr. McCutie Pants.

Hee hee

Beesie

Spam spam spam spam.  I don't think the women on this board - or in this forum  - are overly concerned about erectile dysfunction.

I know that these spammers earn money for placing these links on whatever websites they can find and I know that the economy is horrible and jobs are hard to come by but really, it would be nice if they actually used some intelligence in choosing which websites to bother.  But that would assume intelligence and that's probably a bad assumption....