Starting Chemo Feb 2010?

me2u

hi february sisters, signing in with bald head again

had hubby shaved off my colorless short fine hair cos it looks weird with colorless fine hair in front and mix with short stubbly hair at the back (leftovers hairs which did not fall off from initial chemos). taste buds are definitely off and being such a food lover myself, this is no good. i cant really taste the food that i cooks for the family.

me too, trying hard to maintain the weight that i have lost in previously months and have started jogging once a week. so far able to jog 3km and hope to increase the mileage gradually. coming monday is my #5 taxol and 6 more to go. can't wait for mine to be over soon!!!!

aside from me, my father-in-law discovered a swelling on his right testicle and is seeing a urology specialist on monday, praying so hard that its gonna be alright as i cant imagine him going through as he is already 79.

mofend

Good Saturday morning, everyone!  Got my biopsy results back from the re-excision of the lumpectomy and the removal of the lump under my armpit (note to everyone - don't EVER google lump under armpit - you'll crawl in a hole and hide, if you do).  Everything is clean and clear from the biopsy!  Wohoo.  I feel like I can start living again - that was hanging hugely over my head and I was in a sort of shut down mode because I didn't want to plan anything until I knew what the immediate future held.  So, now I plan to pop some champagne at my friend's party tonight and get back to living!  Radiation will begin in August, but I'm feeling confident that that will buzz by and then just herceptin until February.  Each milestone feels so incredibly huge with all this. 

me2u - prayers for your father-in-law.

Have a wonderful day, ladies!  I am definitely going to seize the day, as they say - new attitude and a new beginning.  Take care - hugs - Mo 

writer

That's so wonderful, mofend!!!

My surgeon thinks the little red hard bit in my "cancer" breast is a clip that she left in there for the radiation folks to get oriented. She said sometimes the body fights to expel them, and they work their way to the surface (my tumor was deep). It doesn't hurt, and she's positive it's not cancer, so I'm not worried; if it starts to hurt she'll go in and take it out.

My taste buds are slowing returning-- about 50% of normal now, compared to 5% a week ago-- and my intestines are finally calming down. All that should be normal for good soon! The new bummer is this weepy-eyes thing-- I'm crying all the time, and walking (my favorite exercise) is particularly challenging, because fresh air makes it worse. I was hoping it was from the chemo, but the forums make it seem to be Herceptin, which is distressing-- that means I could have 7 more months of constant crying, even when I'm happy!

But I guess it's a small price to pay for getting rid of cancer.

Happy weekend, all

Colleen 

burley

Oh Colleen!  Do you mean your eyes are constantly watering?  I thought it was just me!  I can't do anything without my eyes welling up-SO ANNOYING.  It's hard to drive and wipe my eyes constantly-wearing makeup is pointless-I'm creating huge bags under my eyes from the constant rubbing and wiping.  Ugh.  It's been doing it for about a month now, so I'm assuming it's a side effect from my Taxotere.  Gotta be-no other reason for it.

I'm so happy for everyone that has finished and has taste buds returning, hair growing, etc.  Yea you!  I can't wait until I'm part of that group too-5 more weeks, 5 more weeks...I keep telling myself it will fly by.

No neuropathy or nail problems to speak of.  Although my nails don't seem to be growing at all.  I cut them really short and they've stayed that way.  I can't wait until this is all over and I'll go back to my acrylic nails.

Yea for you, Mo!  Gulp that champagne and celebrate!

Me2u-sorry to hear about your father in law.  Jogging?  Really?  Holy cow, that's awesome!  I wonder if I'll ever be able to jog again with these fake boobs.

For everyone else-have a terrific weekend!

retrievermom

Colleen:  I had a sore spot near my chest wall that I complained to my onc's about.  After checking the ultrasound, my rad onc concluded it must be one of the clips bothering me.  Weeks later, the pain has gone away.  Hope your issues resolve without them having to go in to remove it.

Good to hear everything came back clear, Mo.

Iamstronger

Mofend-Celebrate!!  As we all know, waiting for the results are agonizing.  Glad to hear everything is clear!  Woo Hoo!

Writer-my eyes have been watering a lot lately too.  so annoying.  Glad to hear the lump is nothing.

I had a bit of a scare this week.  I have been fightring a cold and each time I coughed, my chest would hurt pretty intensely.  So, onc ordered a chest x-ray.  That came back clean.  So that is good.  So relieved.  Gone are the days of "ah, i'm sure it is nothing".  I do hope that eventually those thoughts and feelings come back.  But, I have a feeling that the luxury of thinking like that may be gone.  Prior to cancer, i NEVER got sick, and rarely went to the Dr for anything other than annual physicals.  So, this is an entirely new way of living for me. but, I guess it is a small price to pay in order to remain healthy.

Anyway, hope everyone is enjoying the weekend.  We have finally had some sun and boy, does that make a difference on your outlook.

faithfulc

writer/burley, sorry to hear about the eyes watering.  Could it be the tear ducts partially (and temporarily?) blocked?  I've read that this is one of the SEs. 

vmarie, I'm like you - never went to the doctor's more than just an annual checkup (and perhaps an occasional visit due to seasonal allergy).  Gone are those days...

writer

Burley, thanks for the input-- if the watery eyes are from Taxotere, that's good news, because I'm done with it, so hopefully that will stop soon. When I go in for my Herceptin and Avastin this week I'll ask about it, and maybe there's something to do about it-- like if it is a blocked tear-duct thing, perhaps there's a treatment. It's not painful, just annoying. I have to go find some old-fashioned cotton hankies and carry them around like a Victorian lady!

Taste buds are returning and intestinal trouble abating... now comes the challenge of not gaining back the weight I've lost! Party last night, dinner with friends tonight, my birthday this week, etc etc... desserts and wine and other fun stuff to tempt...

But it's nice to have fun again.

swiftbird

Hi February sisters, did my last treatment on thursday (yippee!). Coping with the normal SEs.  This time though, got to have a wonderful transfusion yesterday. First timer. Have to admit I feel better than same time last time after #5.  Did anyone else have to have a blood transfusion? Kinda weirded me out but I feel just a bit better, so am hopeful I won't have such a tough week ahead of me (as was #4 and #5).  

July surgery all set. Not sure whether lumpectomy or mastectomy. Good news is my tumah shrunk from the initial 9+cm to now 3.3cm, so we're hoping this last round takes it down even more. Major shoutout for my oncologist. Because before I went to him, my surgeon before him was trying to schedule me into immediate surgery for full radical bilateral mastectomies. And I came back BRAC negative. Can't say enough about second opinions.

retrievermom

WOW swiftbird!  Gives "shrinkage" a whole new meaning (remember Seinfeld?).  That is wonderful.

Have a great birthday, Colleen.

Ado

My 51st Birthday today and my kitchen looks and smells like a florists. Isn't it good to have true friends and loving family aound us at this time. My last chemo is on Thursday. Number 5 was horrible but I just want to get on with number 6 and recover. Like many of us I hardly ever went to the doctor before this. How life has changed since I my 50th birthday last year which prompted the call up for my first mammogram. Thank goodness I went. I cancelled it at first as I didn;t fancy the discomfort but somehting told me to go and here I am hopefully on the way to recovery and a long life.

leta17

Ado - Happy birthday!  You are almost finished!!

Swiftbird - That is great news you are finished and the tumor shrank! Second opinions are good!

I had the MRI guided biopsy today, they took tissue right by my scar, now I wait for results....even if negative I am seriously considering a BM...the poking and proding etc is dreadful and I can't imagine possibly going through this every 6 months and why a good friend chose the BM as well.  We shall see.

Take care ladies!

swiftbird

Ado, Happy Birthday !! ALmost done; I am in midst of #6 SEs... as usual, not fun, but I keep my eyes on the prize and it's helping me. This time around I'm giving myself some time off - I've worked through my entire chemo regime, but I'm taking some R&R this time. Good thing to do. Maybe a little past due.

leta17, I am still trying to decide but the whole lymphodemia (sp?) and major reconsruction questions seem just as overwhelming. Have a lot of analysis and praying to do between now and when I have to decide my surgical options in a few weeks.  

burley

I don't envy those of you having to make surgical decisions.  My BS basically told me I was having a bilateral mastectomy, and I completely trusted his opinion (recommended by 3 people.)  Plus, there's 5 women on my mother's side that had breast cancer, so I was kinda expecting it to occur at some point, and that I would opt for a mastectomy.

I honestly can't imagine having only a lumpectomy.  It would really freak me out to have remaining breast tissue.  But that's me-fammily history, and all.

Happy Birthday to the birthday girls!  Definitely something to celebrate this year.

I'm supposed to actually have a one-on-one dinner with the hubby tonight, and it's going to look like I'm crying the entire time!  I constantly wipe my eyes, especially my left.  If I don't, tears actually run down my face.  Oh!  And I broke out in a rash all over my face-little bumps that look like bad acne.  REALLY?  Can't a girl catch a break?

CinD

Ado and Colleen, I hope both of you have great birthdays this week!

Switfbird, congratulations on finishing chemo!  Your tumor shrinkage is amazing. Most of us can't really see the results of our chemo, but your incredible shrinking tumor is evidence that it does work.

VMarie and Mo, that's great that both of you had clear tests!  After what we've all been thru, I don't know if it will be possible for any of us to not freak out a little with every future test. I know I've been worrying about my next mammogram on my remaining breast, which should be done over the next month or so before my exchange surgery.

Leta, I hope you get your results soon and that everything is good. 

Good luck to all making surgical decisions. I went round and round, beginning with a lumpectomy and SNB but going back for a mastectomy and full lymph node removal on that side when one node came back positive. 

I'm happy to report that my new hair growth is my normal color, red. I had that clear stuff sprout first but now the real stuff is coming back. I had worried it might be gray or white, so I'm thrilled to see I'm still a strawberry blonde.

Sending out good thoughts to all still having treatments. Take care, all.

Cindy

leta17

Thanks for all the good wishes, the biopsy was B9!  Phew!!! 

I also cleared a 4 day weekend, now in the middle of rads, with my Radiologist!!!  I so didn't want to miss my daughter and her dance troup dancing in Disney!!!  Then right after I finish rads, we all head to England for 2 1/2 weeks.  It will be a true celebration to be finished!!!!

My hair too is coming in dark brown, my nomal color and the wig is getting itchy, but at least it is growing!! 

Have a great day ladies!!!  

riley702

Congrats, leta. That's fabulous news. Have fun at Disney and in England.

faithfulc

Leta, so happy for you!!

retrievermom

My hair is coming in grey and white, and I certainly don't feel I look like myself, but it's growing fairly quickly.

Great news, Leta.  Your trip will be a wonderful reward when you finish rads, too.

burley

Surprisingly, with still 2 treatments to go, I've got some hair still coming in and it's a mix of brown (my color) and white.  Weird.  But I'm still losing eyebrows and eyelashes!  Aaaaaaah!  And I've got more hair on one side of my head-the side I lay on the most doesn't have as much.  Fun.  I have a feeling I'm going to have to do a shave at some point-maybe after my last treatment-and start fresh from there.

Feeling good-normal.  Except for the constant eye running and hot flashes, that is.  I haven't experienced any neuropathy or problems with my fingernails-yea!

Rash on my face is slowly going away-still looks like acne.  I'm afraid to put anything on it, even moisturizer (and my skin is practically flaking off.)

I hope everyone has a great evening!

swiftbird

retrievermom, so how long has it taken for your hair to start coming in?

retrievermom

My last chemo round was Ap 8.  I've had significant hair growth the last two weeks; it's not stubbly anymore.  Still too short to spike, but it's even and soft.  I know some folks experience patchy growth. I go out without head coverings, but it's so cold in my office now that they've turned on the air that I take a scarf to work.

kshep

Congrats to all those finishing up! I finished Taxol number 8 yesterday- 4 more to go. I did get to escape to Colorado last weekend and it was wonderful to spend down time with my DH. Weather was cool and rainy- and I was disappointed in my stamina on the simple walking trails we did.  Came home and bumped up my walking routine here.

I forgot to ask my onc last week, but asked the chemo nurse yesterday about timing of port removal. Was extremly bummed about her response of usually a year before removal- and that some C patients leave it in forever- considering it challenging the gods..or luck or something to remove it.   However, she said they may make an exception based on my prognosis and the fact that I am wanting to do the reconstructive surgery to replace this damn TE with the silicon as soon as they will let me. There would only be one reason not to remove the port...and I just don't think I can go there right now.

I am thinking about making an appt with the social worker- feeling stressed and down about the whole "life after" chemo..cancer..whatever.  I should be excited about being almost done and instead I am feeling pretty low. I probably shouldn't be surprised, I have way too much time to think when school is out.

One more point- I think I made a discovery about the hot flashes. I think mine is triggered by caffiene.  I couldn't get decaf tea in Colo and drank the regular and my HF's increased dramatically.  When I got home and went back to the decaf it has been much better- so- watch for triggers- caffiene, alcohol and stress seem to be the ones most frequently mentioned.  Well off to my 3 mo follow up with the BS, probably a waste of time.

mofend

kshep - I don't have a port and have had great luck with my veins through all this, but it sounds awfully morose to think that people keep it in "just in case".  I'd be getting that thing out asap and moving on.  Life after cancer is a funny thing and I don't feel like I'm after cancer yet because my hair is still not here so much and that is sort of definining this stage in our lives - "wouldn't we have hair if we didn't have cancer," is what I think most people think when they see us.   Wish we could all get together and have a grand spa renewal visit - I think that's something I could really use about now.  Hugs, kshep, just take it one day at a time and remember to breathe!  Mo 

burley

Oh no, tell me I don't have to wait a year!  I was hoping to get all my surgeries done before the end of this year since I've met my out-of-pocket with my insurance.  I'll have to ask my Onc next week.

Sorry you're feeling low, kshep.  Definitely make an appointment with someone to talk it out.  There's no reason to feel bad when there's so much help out there.

I have my low days, for sure...mostly from being bored and lonely.  It's hard when all your friends work full-time, and you hardly see your husband.  It's been nice having my daughter around for the summer.  And I'm counting the days until my son gets home from summer camp in 2 weeks!

I hope everyone has a great rest of your day!

faithfulc

About port - I'm hoping to get it out before the end of year as well.  Same as burley, I've met my out of pocket max for the year.  More importantly, I don't want the port there to remind me what I went through.  It was a big help during chemo, but now that chemo's over I'll gladly say bye bye to the port.

Nurse also said 2 years and onc said at least through rads - "in case" I get infection it'll be easy to administer strong antibiotics through the port etc etc.  I'll insist on taking it out by November, for sure.  My rads will finish by first week of August.

I'm a month out chemo - a layer of soft hair but not too thick yet.  I still look bald, probably because the "hair" I have is still mostly the transparent type.  Hoping that things will get better next month.  The good news is that my white blood cells have bounced back to above 5, when it hovered just above 3 when I was on TC.  ("when I was on TC" - sounds so bizarre...)

To those who are finishing soon - hang in there!  You are almost at the finish line.

Ado

Last chemo done yesterday and amazingly I am ok and up and about already. No sickness, 30 minutes of nausea before a sleeping tablet and an ok night sleeping in between the hot flushes. Sleeping on and off throughout today but otherwise good. My chemo was delayed for 3 hours as 12 people were booked in for 9 and only one nurse there! The sisters sitting in their office were too grand to step in and help and avoided eye contact with all of us throughout the morning. I felt sorry for the 3 nurses who did actualy start as they were under so much pressure. It is a disgrace when so many unwell women were kept waiting. Herceptin in 4 weeks. I'm putting it out of my mind for now. Good luck all of those with chemos to come.

leta17

kshep - very common to feel down prior to end.  My onc told me that many feel 'protected' while undergoing treatment and the routine of it all.  She said that I should call her if I have any significant change in my modes and asked my DH to keep a watch.  It doesn't always happen, certainly, but she has some great people that I can talk with, should I need it.  Perhaps meet with a social worker in the hospital, talking out feelings is helpful as well:) 

Hot flashes do seem to have triggers!  The frequency of mine has gone down significantly since my last tx but a few sips of wine and bamm, hot flash!   Pizza and deserts/sugar are 2 other triggers for me.  All of these things are on many 'no, no' lists of what to avoid to fight/prevent cancer:  alcohol, fats (cheese) and sugars.  I was a big consumer of cheese prior, but cut out everything but the occasional pizza with my kids, wine down to a social glass or 1/2 glass on the weekend and still working on saying no to chocolate cake or chocochip cookies:)

Ado - Congrats!

 Be well!

grdnslve

no way am i keeping this port in.  i will demand it comes out as soon as treatment is over.  how can you feel like this is over with that thing in there still?  plus-as someone else referred to-my deductable has been met--don't want to pay even more to take it out by waiting.

they finally burned me with the radiation..so bad they changed areas to treat and will finish up there later.  ugh..was so hoping to get through this with minimal damage to my skin as that will effect the reconstruction success.  sniff...

neurontin seems to be helping the hot flashes..not quite so bad anyway.

have a good weekend ladies.

kshep

leta- No Pizza?  No wine?!? What will I eat?? Actually wine just still does not taste good...unfortunately we have a whole wine storage unit filled with the stuff.  DH is buying less now tho. But pizza...might be worth the hot flashes.

Thanks for the support ladies, I was really feeling blue on Weds.  I am doing much better. I had a follow up with my general surgeon on Thurs and she brushed off the waiting a year thing too.  She said I can take it out whenever I want- still have not talked to the onc about it but she was reassuring. (She has always seemed to be the one with reasonable answers and common sense explanations)  Ideally I could have the PS take it out while replacing the TE with the permanent silicon implant.

Its so warm and humid here now I am not sure if its a hot flash or the weather! Thanks again for the safe place to have a "melt down"- both emotionally and physically!