November 2009-Starting Chemo

micheleboots

Mouse, I had intense bone pain with my neupogen shot...lasted for 7 days.  That was the worse SE ever.  Can't wait to start again this Friday...oh lucky me.

Melinda, Love your new picture....sexy hot..eyelashes or not.  Enjoy your nice juicy stake.

Cathy big hugs for your DH...Mine is great too.

Linda,,, you go girl.   keep shrinking that tumor...

JustmeAlicia

Melinda ~ it is different.  Easier as far as really no nausea.  But the pain was rather unfortunate.  I also have a poison ivy like rash on my right hand that is rather annoying.  I guess all in all it doesn't wipe you out as much as the AC.  AND who knows maybe your SE's won't be that bad.  Keep positive my friend.  AND yes,my eyebrows are nearly non existent and I have a only a few eyelashes.  I truly look like a cancer patient now.  I used a powder eyebrow to color them in today and now I look like Bobo the CLOWN.  Such a joy !! 

Hugs ~

Alicia

mabelle

Happy New Year everyone! 

Cafe - such great news on your shrinking tumor. Congrats!

Treatment # 3 is coming up on Wednesday and I'm with the rest of you... I get sad, angry, grumpy, and just downright emotional in the days leading up to tx. Sort of like PMS! I wonder if we could use it as a defence in a criminal trial?

Michele - my husband is going to be away for my next tx too. He's working in Edmonton for the next 5 weeks, so he'll be missing my next 2 AC treatments (and everything in between). I guess I'll see first hand what it feels like for all you single moms that are going through this. I've got to admit I'm scared and nervous to do this alone. I do have lots of friends to lend support, but at the end of the day, its just going to be me and the kids. 

Melinda - I haven't lost that many eyelashes or eyebrows yet... though every time I wash my face I see one or two little hairs in the sink. I don't have a clue how to draw in eyebrows or put on false eyelashes, but I've heard that they teach great techniques in "look good feel better" classes. Have you been or planning to go? I've been thinking about it. 

One more day till the kids are back in school and I can't wait. Happy Sunday everyone! 

doronet

Haven't been on-line in a while.  Felt horrible since my Taxol TX on Dec. 29th, but the SE's were from cumulative A/C...New Year's Eve morning had terrible burning on the palm of my hands and a massive headache.  I couldn't even touch my finger tips to my palms due to the pain. Called the Onc because I didn't remember reading anything anywhere, to include these postings, about burning hands.  Was told it was from the A/C, and the headache could have been from the Zofran (old news).  Was told to keep hands lubricated with heavy, greasy cream (how that was to help the burning was beyond me) to keep them from pealing, which they are doing some.  Was a total waste of waiting by the phone, but at least I found out it wasn't a life-or-death SE.  Luckily, my daughter was here and she spent the morning preparing food for our annual New Year's Eve buffet (we eat and watch movies to ring in the New Year.)  She had to go to work that afternoon, but by then, I felt good enough to finish the food myself.  The burning was less New Year's day and the headache not as bad, but I still just sat around all day.  Am taking late-morning, afternoon naps, which is weird, but figure I must need it if I'm falling asleep watching TV with my family at noon.  Also have been extremely emotional, crying a lot.  Guess it is the A/C, numerous headaches, and the time of year. (I was supposed to travel with my two kids to a sister's house in NC this weekend for a family get-together, but had to cancel because I felt so bad.  Guess planning to go in the first place was wishful thinking.)  Am hoping the affects of the A/C will soon go away.    Good news, too, that I only have to take 2 Decadron night before and morning of Tuesday's Taxol and I also get half the dose of Benedryl during the TX.  Should make for a more comfortable TX.  I'll welcome my taste buds when they come out of hiding or unmask themselves.

Alicia:  in the past 3 weeks, I have actually "exercised" 2 times, one being yesterday.  I haven't gone this long without working out since my son was born and he'll be 16 the end of this month. Just no energy or motivation.  I do have some joint pain from the Taxol, but nothing like you and mouse6694 (?) are having.  I'm taking Tylenol every 6-8 hrs though, and luckily, that's helping me.  I haven't lost any facial hair yet.   Figure that is coming.   Think I read not to use fake eyelashes, but can't remember why.  The glue maybe?  

mabelle: you can do it, too!  We're behind you!

cafe: Great news re:  shrinking tumors!!!!  hurray!!

I was told I'd have my port out before radiation.  Wonder what the hydration-thing is with the rad?  Hadn't heard of that either.

Happy New Year to everyone and here's to a better spring that can't get here fast enough.

feistybluegecko

warm new year hugs to you all

warm wishes to you all from the other side of AC - 4th and final, on to TX next! Am so glad to be half way!!  I have also found that the AC side effects seemed to bring me further down each time.  and the taste bud problem - yuck, yuck yuck.  Feeling pretty rough but manageable so far.

I think I am probably feeling a lot better than the mosquito that bit my ankles not long after the treatment though!! I imagine the unsuspecting mossie got way more than it bargained for. A double dose of chemotherapy and all its attendant side effects!!! I can see it groaning as it lurches around in its state of extreme nausea. And the horror when it experiences the pink urine effect!!!

Hugs and smiles to you all

philippa

JustmeAlicia

Philippa ~ your mosquito story is so funny !!!  if we all put our funny comments together we would have a damn fine book ! 

Nettie ~ I too had the burning in my hands, but it was in my fingertips ~ they felt like I burned them on something hot.  It only lasted for a day.  I believe it was some type of neuropathy from the Taxol.  I then went on to develop a poison TAXOL like rash on my right hand.  I am glad you seem to be feeling a bit better.  The false eyelashes my onco told me the adhesive can cause an allergic reaction or infection.  Not to chance it. Uglier here I come !!! 

Hugs ~

Alicia

sueinfl

I really hate the idea of anyone else having to go through chemo, but I am so grateful knowing I am not the only one who cries the day before. It is just pure anticipatory fear, misery and a huge dose of self pity on my part. Except for being hairless, tiring easily, and having a port that still bothers me, I have no SE's at the moment. Although, my fingernails are starting to darken at the cuticle, like bruising under the nail. Toenails are fine so far. It doesn't look like the blackening that can happen with Taxotere, but will ask the onc about it tomorrow before TAC #4.

I still have eyebrows at this point and half my eyelashes (I really miss them more than my hair!). What I want to know is why I still have arm hair? Weird. At 54, I can just see my facial hair growing back before my head!  I won't have to worry about it until March in any case.

((((((hugs))))))) to all my fellow Warrior Whimps!

Mouse6694

Day 6 after Taxol and finally pain is tolerable was not expecting that much pain at all. I figured since I handled neulesta bone pain that this would be easy but maybe the combo of both was too much. I am definetly talking to onc about this. No fake eyelashes you could get an infection just draw eyeliner on lids to fake the appearance of lashes.

Alicia:Sending thoughts and prayers your way for your dh's appt. tomorrow.

kyasou

I am starting up weekly taxol x12wks tomorrow and found all the comments here helpful.  Thank you all for sharing your stories.  I am a nervous wreck but am hopeful I will do better on it than AC.  I am wondering if weekly Taxol is easier than every 2 weeks?  I was told that it is a lower dose.  My onc. also has me on a heavy dose of glutamine to help with SEs...is anyone else taking it?  I wonder if it will actually help or not. 

suzieq60

All the best to everyone having chemo this week.

msmpatty

Kyasou - I'm on the weekly Taxol regimen and I do think that the SEs are less on the weekly than on the every two weeks schedule.  On the weekly regimen the protocol is  80mg/m2  for each TX versus 175mg/m2 on the bi-weekly...so the weekly dose is a little less than 1/2 the bi-weekly dose.   Plus, with the bi-weekly I think it is common to get the Neulastra or neuprogen injections which you don't usually need on the weekly, so you don't have to deal the SEs of those injections along with the Taxol.   I'm on my 8th weekly Taxol TX and so far no problems with pain and only minor intermittent numbness in my fingers.  My only major SE has been fatigue ... but we are, unfortunately,  used to that.  HA!  I take a daily B complex vitamin, but haven't tried the glutamine since I haven't had the nueropathy problem.   We all react so differently that is really hard to predict what your SEs will be.  I agree with Alicia, the way you feel on Taxol is definitely different than on AC. For me it has been much, much easier!

Patty

Edited to add:  Here's good news...lots of people start growing hair on Taxol!   Mine started growing about 10-weeks after my last AC TX.

kyasou

msmpatty:  Thank you so much for replying...I will sleep much better tonight because of it (at least as much as the steroid lets me). 

Mouse6694

Went to see my onc yesterday about the intense bone pain and she gave me more percocet and is gonna lower my neulesta shot. She doesnt know whats going on with stomach pain and ordred a pelvic ultrasound and gave me some spasm meds. My stomach feels like I did 1000 crunches. Worried about Alicia and her dh appt at onc yesterday she didnt post hopefully everything is ok send out good thoughts and prayers everyone.

JustmeAlicia

HI ~ sorry to worry you.  Really don't know anything.  Sounds like some complex thrombosis blood syndrome where the bone marrow tells the blood to make too many platelets.  They did some genetic blood test.  May have to go in for a body scan make sure he has no tumors anywhere.  I am too scared to think about it.  We are awaiting test results will have in about a week, and we go back to redo blood work in 2.  Hoping it goes down.  It did go down by 100 but it still nearly double the normal.  He is on baby aspirin regimen for now.  So best case scenario they don't find anything wrong and it is a blood disorder that can be managed with medication.

Mouse ~ I had shooting pains in my pelvis area (low stomach) from the Taxol.  Radiated down to my toes.  It was insane.  Hoping it is just the Taxol killing your stomach. 

Hugs ~

Alicia

BrendaSharon

Hello Warriors!

Sorry I haven't been much good to anyone lately, not even myself.

SueInFlu, I too have been crying a lot lately, and YES the day before I loose it badly. I'm so frigging ready to be done with all this crap! I realize that each TX I feel worse and worse. Bad enough I'm already 56, but because of this I am now beginning to look it. I was always told I was young looking, but this crap has made me look really old, wrinkled, and all dried up. I miss my LIFE and the things I once done such a short time ago. Enough of the pity party.

Littlebird,

Good luck to you on your 3rd AC today, I wish you the best and pray you have little side effects!

You deserve a turn to feel as well as can be expected! My heart is with you!

Kyasou & BoxerSue, #1 Taxol today.

Doronet #2 Taxol today,

Omarsmom7, #3 Taxol today

Thank you Pattyfor giving some encouraging words to our warriors on their Taxol journey now ~ Thank you, Sweet Jesus they are nearing the end! ~ We all need all the hope and faith and encouragement we can get.

Alicia,

Thank you so much, for picking up my slack while I was absent. I don't know what's up with me, but I had begun to feel overwhelmed with reading everyone's pain and misery. I thought I was going to just continue with my smooth sailing and boom not as I wished and hoped for. When I get really sick I don't deal well with life. I sometimes wish my life was over so I don't have to continue to deal with this crap. I don't want my DH to have to keep dealing with my crap either. He is so good to me and this is so unfair to him. Speaking of DH's, I pray and wait to hear that all is going to be OK with yours ~~ I will try to perk up, I'm just depressed. I've lost my fountain of youth that I held for so long and was so proud of and that is what depresses me the most.

I also hope your burning sensations stop in your hands.

Doronette,

I'm sorry you also have had such problems with your hands burning. EXERCISE, what is that?!!! Too funny to even think about. I haven't been a good girl at all as I haven't exercised a bit since day one of diagnosis. Probably won't start either. My headaches are also worse after each TX and I'm bginning to get worried as I am fixing to get #5 TX next. The "Red Devil" is gonna kill me!~

Phillipia,

Thank You for the SMILE! ~~~~loved the mosquito story~~~

I must say that one thing I notice is we all seem to have some wonderful DH's!!!!!

To all I may have missed~~~ know that my heart and my thoughts are with each of you

(((((((((((((Warrior Hugs))))))))))

micheleboots

Brenda, I know how hard this is on us, but we are STRONG WARRIORS, and this too shall pass..we must take one day at a time and look to the bright future..remember we are always here for venting, crying and laughter.

Mouse6694

I think it just must be in the air because I had the most depressing 5 days I have ever had on chemo. Yesterday I broke down in the dr. office telling her I could not take that pain again and she is gonna try lowering my neulesta shot, she said it must of been a combo of period and bone pain from both taxol and shot. I am going for another ultrasound to check on my ovarian cysts and see if they could be the reason. For some reason my heart rate is high 145 so she did a ekg and she said everything looked fine and to drink more water and rest I am tired of resting I have been in bed literally for 5 days. And now the anti spasm meds she gave me are giving me a rash......Well off to go get a heceptin tx. hopefully no more new side effects for my supposedly good weekend. Ok positive thinking from here on out.

BrendaSharon

Micheleboots,

Thank you for always having a kind word to say. I will try to be the 'Strong Warrior" You know.

Mouse,

Totally understand and I too will try to be positive from here on. Just remember (TRY)is the operative word at this moment. Tomorrow we may feel different, hopefully we will feel awesome!!!

Love to all ((((HUGS))))   

Psalm121

Hello Beautiful Warrior Ladies!

Oh, I'm so sad, sad, sad!!  and then I log on and see other warriors in the same predicament, we are (a lot of us) in the dreary midst of winter and it is so difficult to be energetic and optimistic.  Yet even when we are miserable, we are supportive and loving. You, my friends, are what help keep me going.  We are collectively a group we did not seek to join but rejoice in the knowledge that we have "sisters" we can lean on, and know that we are accepted no matter what.  Unconditional Cyber-Love!!  I also was thinking this morning of all of you and thought we are "Bosom Friends"!!  Anyone remember "Anne of Green Gables"?

Brenda, my heart goes out to you...I'm not the best at keeping up with everyone and so admire those of you that do.  Just know that I pray for everyone on a daily (and throughout the day) basis.  Whenever I think of you individually or as a group, I say a prayer for everyone.  I firmly believe that when we are given such an  impression, it is from God and He is giving us an opportunity to lift up our loved ones in prayer.  Hope everyone has a Blessed day!

micheleboots

So I am still on the fence with the cleritin before neupogen shots...who tried this?  Did it work...I guess I should figure it out soon..I just am sick of putting drugs in my body.  Why does this work?

Psalm121

Michele,

So sorry you're in so much pain...I don't have Neupogen/Neulasta shots, but I tried the Claritin for bone/joint pain....didn't help.  It has helped watery eyes...some.  My right eye is constantly watery and still has that aggravating nerve twitch.  I'm two days away from chemo and am so dreading the days afterward, I know what to expect and it makes me want to cry.

suzieq60

Mouse6694: I had really bad stomach/bowel cramps from the taxotere. I spent the best part of a week in bed groaning and bent at the middle. My onc put me on Somac which I start taking the day before chemo. It fixed it. I was a different person after the 2nd treatment. Only got bowel pain when I had to go to the bathroom.

JustmeAlicia

Michele ~

I take the Claritin the day of my Neulasta shot and for a week after.  Not really sure if it helps or not.  My sinuses are always hurting so maybe it helps them.  That Neulasta pain is awful and now adding that onto the Taxol pain.  I CAN ONLY imagine.  Monday's chemo I am blessed with the darn shot the next day ~ Painkillers here I COME.  Give the Claritin a try for a few days see if it helps any. 

Wishing everyone a good evening.  Hope all our girls that had an infusion today are feeling ok.

Thinking of u all ~

Alicia

Melinda41

We need to cheer up things in here. Watch this video and imagine ourselves all living to be grandmas hamming it up. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7G3bTuHo7qw

JustmeAlicia

Melinda ~ Thanks for the laugh.  That granny in the green shirt is sooo funny !!!

sueinfl

Day two after chemo and the usual "gee, you are doing great after a round of chemo" which precedes a killer third day where I lay on the couch all day in the fetal position hugging my midsection which is a painful knot and dreading every thing that has to go into my mouth, be it meds or food or even water. Then it will slowly get better the next day and on we go.

Brenda, everything you said about becoming an old lady overnight I second. I am not ready for crone status. I don't have the insight, patience, and wisdom to pull it off yet.

Alicia, I am so sorry for the extra stress and I hope his is a quick fix as is yours. 

As for the dreariness of this time of year, keep one string of xmas lights out and find some corner to hang them to add some light to the evenings or middle of the nights when the hot flashes or insomnia hits. A ficus makes the perfect xmas tree substitute.

Thank goodness for the support and company we have through all of this.

Sue

micheleboots

have any of the ladies on neupogen tried the claritin?  I see that only the ladies who get neulasta responded...

BeccaS

Was feeling so much like many of you --- tired of this, dreading the upcoming tx (Thursday), legs twitchy, mouth awful, unsettled...just YUK. Hadn't checked in here for awhile, busy with holidays and trying to work. Finally read all your posts and somehow feel comforted and understood. Wish I could meet you all in person - wouldn't that be fun!

Becca

suzieq60

Tx No 3 out of the way - half way hurray!!!

 Had good talk to my onc today as I hadn't seen him since the first treatment. He answered all of the questions on my long list. He didn't bat any eye when I asked him about pleomorphic lobular cancer. He so used to me pulling technical terms out of thin air. He did say that most her2+ve lobular cancers are pleomorphic - that puts me in the 1% of the breast cancer population. I've not seen my path report so I've arranged for him to get me a copy - hence all my questions about the sub type of the lobular cancer. I must be bored.

 Hope all of you warriors with treatment this week do well.

Cafelovr

Well, I got the results of my breast MRI. By physical examination, my onc said the tumor shrunk by at least a half. I can't even feel it anymore. However, the radiolgy report of the MRI said there was no change to the tumor. It's still 11 cm. My onc pulled up the pictures and said there were changes. What used to look like a solid mass now looks like swiss cheese. There are holes where the chemo has penetrated it. It was kind of depressing, knowing that the tumor wasn't shrinking. In my head I had this vision of being cancer free. I do have 12 more weeks of chemo to endure, so hopefully that will do some more damage to the site. Just so it blasts away the spot on my liver. Ugh! I don't know if I should be happy about the results or so so about the results. I cried all day yesterday and am crying as I type this. At 38 years old, I didn't expect this to be my life.

Warrior Kick Ass Power. Damned Cancer! I will beat this crap!!!!!!! I've got plans!