I hate October/Breast Cancer Awareness Month

2timer

I hate all the damned pink.  I hate all of the advertisements from different corporations and organizations with their slick promotions telling me how much they are doing to find a cure.  I hate all of the special interest stories highlighting breast cancer.  I hate the fact that October is the month that I get my annual mammogram. 

But most of all ...

I hate being reminded that I had Breast Cancer.

Morgan513

Me too.  The magazine articles just gloss over the realities.  It really bugs me.  I hate having it in my face all the time.  And I hate that people expect me to be Miss BC for the month and think how great this all is.  Makes me want to punch something or someone!

I also have my mammmo in October.  Sucks...

Lorrie 

otter

Hey, you two -- reschedule those mammograms. How about sliding them to November?

My 2nd post-chemo recheck appt with my med onco was originally scheduled for January -- exactly one year after my cancer was diagnosed.  I made them shift it to early February.  And, no way would I do my annual mammograms in January.  Nope.

I'm a bit more immune to the pink stuff this year. Still, it irks me to read about companies sponsoring "free bra fittings" during October, and then finding out that those companies neither fit nor sell mastectomy bras.  They aren't talking about us; they're just trying to sell a product by tugging on other women's heartstrings.  I also am peeved by consumers who are able to soothe their own emotional discomfort or concern about breast cancer simply by buying specially marked packages of yogurt and mailing in the lids, or wearing a pink T-shirt, or eating pink M-'n-M's.

What I wish is that reporters would write about the reality of a breast cancer diagnosis.  Talk about the fear and the sleepless nights; the women who have to start taking anti-anxiety drugs to stay halfway sane during treatment.  Talk about the struggle we go through, trying to decide whether to have a lumpectomy + radiation or lose a breast to mastectomy; and then the physical and psychological issues we face afterward -- regardless of our choice.  Interview women who've developed lymphedema in their hand, arm, and/or chest wall or breast, after breast cancer treatment.  Point out that chemotherapy not only robs us of our scalp hair, but also our eyebrows and eyelashes and every other hair on our bodies.  Talk about the special make-up classes many of us attend, to learn how to make ourselves more presentable and comfortable during those long months.

Speaking of a "cure"... They really, really need to get off this kick of telling the public someone has been "cured" of breast cancer.  Free of cancer?  According to what tests and standards?  For how long?  A more accurate statement might be, "no evidence of disease" -- at least, not at the present time.  It is very hard for some women to get on with their lives while dealing with the constant fear of a recurrence.  Some are able to set that fear aside, or at least put it in a box and hide it somewhere.  Many cannot, even as their families and friends insist that they should be back to their normal selves.  And, the struggles of women with Stage IV breast cancer, or even Stage III, are ignored almost entirely.  All we hear about during "October awareness" month is how important it is to diagnose breast cancer early, because that's when it can be cured. We don't hear about the woman whose tumor was never seen on any of her annual mammograms; or whose doctor assured her the lump she felt was harmless and did not need further workup; or whose chronic back pain turned out to be bone mets -- Stage IV breast cancer from the start.

OTOH, I have a friend who is struggling with Stage IV BC.  Last fall I asked her what she thought of all the pink, October awareness stuff.  She said it no longer bothered her.  She said her thinking was, if it gets one more woman to go to the doctor to have a lump checked out or have that long-overdue mammogram, that's a good thing.

I'm still not thinking that, yet.

otter 

idaho

AMEN SISTERS.  Tami

Jellydonut

Slack,

You're not alone, my dear.  Many of us detest the annual pink hoopla engulfing us from all angles.  Companies who sponsor the "pink behemoth" IMO are wanting to sell their products and see their sales figues raise like Viagra on a limp......you know what .

There may be some good in all of this......but during the entire month of October I would like to forget that I have breast cancer, but all the pink hoopla will never allow that to happen.

vivre

I love October-the real one, not the pink one. I hate the way marketing has ruined the most wonderful month. Even though I was dx in Oct., I was thankful that the beautiful fall weather, got me out and enjoying long walks in the falling leaves. I just wish that my favorite month had not been shanghaied by the pinkwashers. So I intend to just go out and enjoy the leaves changing, and the crisp fall air, and I resolve to not buy anything pink. In fact, I might accidently knock over a pink display here and there. Those shopping cart wheels can get out of control sometimes. Do you guys want to have a contest to see who can knock over the most displays?

Makratz

I agree.  Last October I finished rads and wanted to forget about BC for awhile.  I couldn't, it was everywhere!  I would turn on the radio and cry, turn on the TV, same thing!  I appreciate all that these people are doing for us, but I hate having to watch it/hear about it all the time. It makes me sad.  October is a beautiful month here, with the foliage and nice weather.  That's what I would like to think about. Red, orange, and yellow leaves.....nothing pink!

Emily2008

Oh, I am SOOOO with you!  I went into my local grocery store today and there are all these big pink signs everywhere and then the cashier asks, "Would you like to make a donation for breast cancer research in honor of someone?"  And I think to myself, hmmmm, probably not, considering the $15K I've spent of my own money on tests, surgeries, chemo, yada, yada--and that's AFTER my insurance paid.

So, NO!  I don't want to donate anything and I don't want to be reminded every flippin' time I go into a store that this is breast cancer awareness month.  If anyone saw my scars they'd know I'm aware--very aware.

I need a cookie...

AmyD

I'll admit....I think the pink M&Ms is a little over the top.  About a month after my mastectomy, I ate a 2# bag of "normal" colored M&Ms and should have held out for the pink bag.  Oh, well.  I totally understand the frustrations expressed here (and can relate).  But I also thought I'd share what came to my mind when I thought of October BC Awareness Month: 

Marketing ploys and glossing over the real experiences of breast cancer aside, I guess I can say I'm glad it's everywhere, at least for awhile.   If research dollars are what is needed to keep the scientists ass-up-head-down to find treatments, causes, etc., then bring it on.  If pink is what reminds our friends, sisters, coworkers, mothers remember to feel their boobies and get mammograms, then pink is my color.  I am a testament to early detection (found the lump on my own after a normal mammogram a few months earlier).  The women I know who had breast cancer 15+ years ago and are still going strong are testament to the advances made in treatment through research.  Pink has always been my favorite color.  The fact that I'm alive and well makes me think I love it even more.

otter

Cashier:  "Would you like to make a donation for breast cancer research?"

otter:  "Um, no, I don't think so.  I've already donated my left breast. That's all I can afford right now."

+++++++++++++++++++++++ 

No, I haven't said that, but I've been sorely tempted. Ironically, I was visiting a friend in August 2008 when something similar happened.  I had just finished chemo 2 months earlier and was still completely bald.  I was sitting on her sofa, wearing a ball cap, when her neighbor stopped by to talk to her.  The neighbor did not know I was there. In fact, she had never met me.

Imagine my surprise when the neighbor, after a few minutes of introductions and chit-chat, pulled out a big envelope and said to my friend, "How would you like to pledge some money for the 'cancer walk' I'll be in next week?"

My friend said no, so the neighbor turned to me. "Well, how about you?  Would you like to pledge some money on my behalf?"  I couldn't help it -- I took off my ball cap, showed her my bald head, and said, "Sorry, but I've already donated."

She stammered a minute and then said, "Oh, yes, well, I guess you have.  Thanks anyway.  Oh, and, your head looks great, bald."

otter 

lene17

Today, at Staples - of all places, the pink was rampant.  Pink permanent markers and pink pens with slogans (changed with each click)??  Too many marketing ploys. Just how much money actually goes towards research?  I'm happy the pink brings awareness but I HATE October for pushing it in my face.  Last year, after my Sept. 26 mastectomy, everyone bought something pink for me - coffee cups, bracelets, t-shirts.  I couldn't turn the TV on without reminders of what had just happened to me.  This year, I'm trying to be more upbeat and not dread the deluge of pink. What a difference a year makes! 

bettysgirl

I actually had someone tell me last week that the PINK month was coming...like i should be excited...I tried to be nice and just say that i don't embrace the pink as much as some do. I don't want to wear October like a badge and it does get a little old when all the cashiers want you to donate. Last year i had quite a sore lip!!

I do hope that some of the emphasis will encourage someone to check themselves ( i don't have huge faith in the mamos since it didn't catch mine) Or to encourage someone to be more aware of those around them that are walking the journey..but I also wish people would realize that it is a huge marketing ploy to pad the pockets of retailers and their heart is in the dollars and not the cause. That is not to say that there are some out there that truly do good things to advance research but not all do.

I also wish that instead of the candy coated, happy life, i'm so much stronger for the journey stories would be countered with some real life, this is a struggle stories so that someone out there that isn't candy coated happy knows that there are others out there like her.

lovinmomma

I am 1 year out and not sure how I will feel in Oct! I was diagnosed on 9/26 with bc and on 10/15 with  stage 4. This will be my first full Oct with this knowledge. I do wear a small pink ribbon, but nothing else right now.

Meece

I usually have my annual mammo in October because it makes it easy to remember when I had my last one.  This year my oncologist found it necessary to move it up by five weeks.  Then I spent the next three weeks trying to get in for a stereotactic core biopsy, now, tonight I am on the eve of my return to the oncologist for the results.   All finished before Pinktober! 

But, I have had a pink ribbon magnet on the back of my car continuously for 5 years.  I have a little pink ribbon pin that I had attached to my purse (all the time) since 2000, which now sits in the interior of my car where I see it each day.  Last year I put up pink holdiay lights on my house and pink film over my porch and walkway lights for the entire month, and I plan to repeat it this year.

What I hate is CANCER!  I hate that I had it, and I hate that anyone else has to go through it.  I hate that many women succomb to it.  I hate that some people are aware of breast cancer just one month a year. I hate that people think you are contagious when you have cancer.  I hate that people judge how much "cancer" you've had by how much of your body had to be removed because of it.  I hate the misinformation about BC.   I hate that people think that once you finish treatment, people expect you to "be over it".

Therefore, I love that October brings a focus on our common experience.  I love that those who have made it through cancer, can join here to give hope and encouragement to others who are at different stages in treatment.  I love that some organizations use this time to legitimately get information out to the public to make them aware of BC.  I love this place because it is full to the brim of other women who can understand ME and where I am coming from.

I love pink because it symbolizes that I am alive!

cookiegal

I like that people walk for us, I love that people raise money for a cure, all the pink stuff I can live without.

I wish that people could skip the pink lip gloss and just give all the money to research.

Anonymous

When I was first diagnosed 4 years ago, I really loved the Pink.  The folowing years, I felt like many of you.  I was so sick of it all.  I was diagnosed stage 4 this year and I am into the Pink again because no matter what some % goes to research and I am praying for a cure.

Me 

Morgan513

I so agree with everyone.  I was in getting my hair done last week and browsed through Self magazine.  Yikes...pink products highlighted all throughout the magazine.  "Buy an $85 pocketbook and 10% goes to BC research".  Huh???  Why not just give the $85 straight to research???  

I feel like the exploitation is ridiculous.  How did it get so out of control?  Yes, I know a little money is better than no money at all but come on!  

Sorry, I can't help but rant!

Lorrie 

holtbolt

I get sick of the constant reminders myself at times.. then I stop and think of how it must feel to be battling lung cancer or colon cancer or some other cancer like anal cancer that doesn't get as much attention or money for research.  If I was in a fight for my life with another type of cancer... I imagine the pink might bother me alot more... so I suddenly find myself grateful to be in this group... if I HAVE to be in a group...if that makes sense... but yeah... I hate pink too and I'm not one to wear the ribbons and draw attention to my plight.... maybe that'll change the further I get out from treatment, who knows...

flash

I guess I look at it a little differently.  I don't think the person buying the "pink" would give the amount of the item but is willing to buy that item because a little will go to the research. If that's the only way to get some money out of that person's wallet, then great, go pink.  I don't mind the reminder because it's not a reminder for me.  I get reminded every time I move and think crap, I miss being able to move like I used to move ( AI's take a bow.) I get reminded as my hair no longer swishes on my back. (but it's at least brushable now.) So the additional reminder isn't really even noticable. I live with it all the time, what's a little more.

I do like that it makes my friends remember that they need to check themselves and get the mammos.  If it helps someone, anyone, it's worth it.  None of us need more sisters on this board.

holtbolt

You're right Flash... we all have reminders everyday...  and it makes me sick how many women are on here fighting this disease...  I'll tolerate all the pink if the result ends up being that someday this site won't have cause to exist... wouldn't that be something....

GramE

Last Pinktober I was just finishing weekly Taxol and Herceptin.  Tired, aching, bald, etc, etc.  No one needed to remind me...   So, I did wear pink and one t shirt that is neon green with " Forget the ribbons, Cure it".   I made stickers using large return address labels (on the computer) with this:

"Breast Cancer is a disease, not a marketing tool.  Cure it now."   My shopping cart, purse, elbow and feet often found displays that got in my way.   Stickers got plastered on products and signs.  My most significant act was to go thru the mall and put stickers on the doors and windows of shops that tauted PINK month.   

If a person wants to buy an item to support a cause, so be it.  I am a survivor and I am proud of myself for doing what I had to to get this far.   I will wear pink, because I like pink and I wear it other months of the year also.   My DIL and I will walk the local walk the end of October.  

Each day I am reminded by my scars and that is the way it is.  I also have answered with " I already donated more than my pound of flesh to BC."   Feel free to copy my sticker idea.  But do not bombard me with pink - a little goes a long way.      HUGS,  Nancy 

kim40

Mecee - I'm with you.  That is how I feel.

I hate the fact that I HAD breast cancer.  I was d/x this past January.  Chemo, rads, and now Herceptin.  I know that the risk of reoccurance is high for me - I hate it and I think about it every single day.

October is awareness month.  I volunteered this past Friday with the Tour for the Cure for Breast Cancer.  And you know what?  The girls on the bus showed ME how to do a proper BSE!!!  I was and still doing it all wrong!!  Imagine, I was d/x with BC and I'm still doing BSE wrong!!

If I can help someone by telling them, please, go have you mammogram or to show them how to do a proper BSE, then I feel like I have done something to help.  I don't mind wearing my pink hat in public.  Yes, I see people looking at me, but what they are looking at is a young 41 year old woman that had breast cancer.  Makes them think twice that they are too young to get it.  I'll do what I can to promote awareness, by volunteering, doing the Run for the Cure, fundraising etc.  Just knowing that I am doing something to help, makes me feel good.  Very theraputic. 

coonie

Well, I guess I'm in the minority. I LOVE pink........I buy pink whenever I can.......I have a pink ribbon on my car.....I have a pink cap with the breast cancer emblem.......I just feel like maybe, just MAYBE one billionaire will see the pink breast cancer awareness "stuff" maybe he'll feel it in his heart to donate to the cause and they can actually CURE breast cancer FOREVER!!! Maybe I'm just being a little overly optimistic

barbe1958

Spontaneously disappearing tumours....okay, you wanna take that risk and not have your cancer removed? Go at it! But, get it OUT of me. Every single cell in our body can become cancerous. As far as disappearing tumours, did they not consider that maybe they reappeared somewhere else? There was a thread about that a long time ago and it pissed me off. Would scare newbies to not do anything.

I bled all over the mammo plate last October 1st. My journey began that day. I was in a major department store in December after my surgery buying flowing tops when the clerk said that there was a free bra fitting in the lingerie department that day. I said no thank you. She said But it's FREE (like when do they ever charge for it?) I said that I had just had a double mastectomy. She said Oh, they can fit ANYONE. I said I didn't have BREASTS to fit anymore. She went quiet while she thought about that.

ALL cancers have colours. I just find it interesting that they found a cure for prostrate cancer BEFORE breast cancer, though breast cancer is so widely spread! Typical medical history of men getting the diagnosis and treatment/cure first. Sheesh! Did you all know that ALL medical theory was based on a (I'm trying to remember exactly, but I'm close enough) 34 year old male, 175 pounds. That was until only about 1974!!! Women have different heart attacks and other medical issues than men. That's why we are so grossly undertreated!

I had a young grocery store lad last winter ask for a cancer donation. I opened my coat and flashed my flat chest covered in a sweater and told him I had already donated my breasts to cancer. He flushed. I would love to have been at his dinner table that night. Come on! I had to go around the display as he was blocking the entrance to force us to look. Then he had the balls to ASK me! (I mean that in a good way) But I just couldn't resist!

This year, someone at work has already asked me if I'm going on the walk for a cure. I told him I had just applied for handicapped license plates (I have!).

Pink, my ass. That's the only thing that is right to be pink!

I apologize now for anyone I have offended. Those of you who know, and love me, understand my rant.

Morgan513

Barbe, I love your post.  And also Athena's post.  I wonder how much at Komen is going to overhead vs. research?  I guess I should be appreciative of the monies donated by them and their contribution but I can't help but think that they've created this Pink monster.  

Oh well...

Lorrie 

ADK

Amen to all - I hate the commercialization of this deadly disease.  I am going to go find a rock to hide under until November.

lassie11

Otter - I love your response to the clerk or anyone else who asks if I'd like to donate to breast cancer. Yup, my left breast is enough of a donation.

And I am just hoping for someone to say something that causes me literally to flip my wig. Maybe one of those people who say oh you have finished chemo, you look really good now that it is all over. It's not over, it's never over, especially since I am still on herceptin, and femara and have radiation to do. And I spent some time assembling myself so as not to look too scarey.

I actually like the colour pink, started wearing it in my mature feminist stage, but as many of you have pointed out, while we sure know more than we ever wanted to about this disease, there are a lot more diseases out there that could stand some research too.

The pink toilet paper at the grocery store yesterday nearly caused me to drive my cart the wrong way. Really, pink toilet paper!!

Morgan513

LOL-pink toilet paper--wow

lassie11

Really - I wonder what the pink dye would do.

hollyann

Well I will like it a whole lot better if they focus on the CAUSE...Only THEN will we find the CURE!.......And unfortunatley I am one of those cashiers who must ask would you like to donate...BUT I ask if you would like to help in the fight against bc...NOT if you would like to donate for research........ Enough with the research already!...Find us a freaking CURE!.....

(edited for spelling...Too early in the morning!..LOL)

Sandygirl

Vote me in as anti-pink.  Did you see in yesterday's Walgreens advertisement , the "Y me bracelet" for Breast Cancer awareness month?  I know I am going to rush out and buy one.