Young Moms

Lauren3

I'm fairly new to the boards -- I'm 33 years old in treatment for Stage 2A breast cancer and I have a 2 year old son.  Some days it's too much to bear, thinking about possibly not seeing my beautiful boy grow up.  Truly it's starting to consume me.  Any suggestions on how to cope?  My husband is wonderfully supportive but he's so optimistic that I can't even really talk to him about my fears. 

PaminFL

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Lauren3

Pam, thank you so much.  This is the least alone I have felt in a very long time.  I will definitely be PMing you! 

P.S. - I laughed when I read your signature "gentle hugs" -- some days I feel like putting a sign around my neck asking people to hug gently!

lovinmomma

It is hard. i was diagnosed when my kids were 18 to 4. My plan is to see them graduate college. OPnce we get there, then we will move on to marriage and grandkids. I do understand that i may not see that, but that is my plan now.

PaminFL

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Lauren3

Yes, yes and yes!  I am done with 4 of 6 rounds of TAC, my next one is a week from tomorrow.  I'll have radiation after.  I did a mastectomy (just one side) back in June and they did part 1 of the reconstruction at the same time.  I'll have it completed once treatment is over.  I have a port in which kind of freaks me out but definitely has made things easier. 

 Pam your boys are so cute.  :-)

PaminFL

Lauren - 

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Lauren3

Each treatment has been a little different with the side effects, but the first treatment was definitely the worst. 

 I just found out on Monday that when the port comes out, I don't have to be put under anesthesia.  It was the greatest news!  Funny what excites me these days!  LOL

BoyMom_2009

Lauren,

I am a mom of three boys.  I'm 40 years old so I guess that I'm on the tail end of being considered a young mom - lol.  My kids are 6, 9 and 16.   I felt such dispair at the beginning of this journey.  This discussion board was one of the things that made me feel sane again.  It sounds like you are getting the gold standard for breast cancer treatment and you can have great hope for the future.  When you are feeling lonely or like no-one understands - join your sisters here and I guarantee that you will feel better.

Lisa

Bono

Hi Lauren,

I am a 2 + year survivor and was diag. at the age of 39. My kids were 7 and 3 when I found out and obviously my husband and I were devastated. I think the hardest part is that we never wanted our kids to lose their "ideal" life. My daughter remembers alot she is the oldest and at times still struggles with it, especially if I am sick or I have an upcoming appt. I now try my best to remind her that no matter what we have made arrangements to make sure that they will be cared for if I am not around. It does seem to help ease her mind. I think she was worried about what would happen to her if I die. I was a stay at home mom until last year and they were just use to me being there always. Dealing with the cancer was never the hard part, thinking about leaving my kids was, so I can understand your fear. My husband is like yours, he feels we are done with the cancer so lets move on. He does not like to talk about it, so that is why I come here. All of us understand and we feel what you feel. So just remember to smile and know that others get it! 

LynnVA

I am 36 and my daughter is 5.  I worry that I have passed on some of my fear and anxiety to her but I have also seen her show great strength and resilience for a 5 year old.   I try to be honest and reassuring. I do the best I can to make her feel safe.

BoyMom_2009

Hi Andrea,

Just wanted to introduce myself as I am a fellow Wisconsinite.  We live rather close to one another as I am in Sussex.  

Lisa 

Lauren3

This board is definitely great.  I'm glad I found it!

weety

I would love to join in on this board as well.  I am 39 years old with 3 kids--8 years, 5 years, and 9 months.  My husband is a lot like the others I read about.  He will never even talk about the "what-ifs"  as he will only entertain the idea that my chemo treatments and early surgery have gotten the cancer.  I, on the other hand, can't seem to let go of the "what-ifs" and I'm guessing that's mostly because of the kids and the devasting thinking that goes along with leaving them without a mommy.  I am currently undergoing chemo (TCH) and just finished treatment #2.

BoyMom_2009

Hi Weety,

I know exactly how you feel about the thoughts that can go through your head when it comes to leaving kids behind. I hope that I can get to a point where I think about it less than dozens of times per day.  As much as a dread all of the treatment ahead, I think that the treatment will be the easy part of my journey.  The hard part will be moving on with my life after treatment is done.

Lisa

Bono

Hi BoyMom_2009 nice to see other Wisconsin survivors on this site. We are pretty close in range to each other and pretty close age wise also. Welcome also to weety911. Since the subject has been brought up, I was wondering if any of you have had any issues with your kids and BC? I have two children, my daughter was 7 and my son 3 at dx. My daughter just seems to be having a hard time with the cancer thing all together. Every time I get even the slightest cough, cold or any appts. are due, she has such anxiety about it. She worries I will die. We have tried to reassure her that even if that happens we have things in place to ensure she will be cared for. It seems to have helped, but I was wondering if anyone else has experienced this with their kids and if so how did/do you handle them? I don't want to minimize her fears, but we have also taken to not telling her anything. We recently had a friend with kids the same age that we all knew that lost her battle with cancer. We have not told our daughter, we just are to concerned about how she will process the loss. I was just looking to hear from others that may have this going on. Any thoughts?