Starting Chemo Aug 09

Lilah

YoYo -- that's the spirit!  Count those weeks down.  You can make it through!

Jenn -- wow that party sounds exhausting but totally fun -- enjoy!  What a proud mama -- her first graduate! 

Yeah I did break down and take a few more Vicodin the other night but now I've turned the corner and the tylenol is doing it for me.  Feel MUCH better today!  Can't wait to get the drain out on Monday.

gillyone

Thinking of you through rads Yoyo!

Jenn - have a wonderful graduation party.

Lilah - so glad you are continuing to improve.

Yesterday I had my first haircut since June last year. Today I went back and got color. Oh boy did I get color. It is really in your face color. I used to be a red head and it's faded and got lighter over the years. I said let's have some fun, I don't want the color to be wimpy. DH has been unable to say anything - he is in shock I think. I think it's a red version of Annie Lennox. I will try to post a picture tomorrow!!!

Lilah

Oh Gilly what fun!  I can't wait to see it

msmpatty

Lilah - There is no shame in taking pain pills if they help!   I took a vicodin the evening after my de-porting...which seemed pretty wimpy after such minor surgery,  but it really helped.   Yeah for your drain removal.   Hate, hate, hate those things.

Yo - Radiation certainly does take a bite out of your day.  But the good news is it goes by really, really fast.   You'll be done before you know it!

Jenn - Good luck on your busy weekend.    The last little chick leaving the nest...so happy, yet sad too.

Patty

gillyone

Attempting to post picture.

Lilah

Gilly -- your hair looks terrific!  Not only that, it looks "intentional" -- you'd never know you lost your hair.  I see a fashion statement

jenn3

Gill- I love your hair, it looks great!! I second Lilah, it looks like you choose the style rather than chemo regrowth.

Well, my "baby" graduated yesterday.  The ceremony was at a historic church that I've never been in.  What a beautiful church.  I was taking pictures of the inside of the church like a tourist.  It was a beautiful ceremony, she was beautiful and my oldest daughter and I cried like babies at the end.  Then we came home and had the crawfish boil - we had so much fun!!! The party started @ 1p and the last person left at 11p.  Talk about a long day.  DD left last night to sleep at her friends house, so that they can wake up and head to the beach today. This morning I woke up to a quite house - that needs a little cleaning of course.  Wow - what a year this has been........

Hope eveyone is having a great weekend.

Lilah

Jenn -- what a triumph!  Yay for you

Yesterday I drove myself and my BF to the city (about 30 miles) to meet with some students for about an hour and then attend an end of year party.  Our offices are moving in the fall so it was more than the usual end of year party (they called it a big blowout goodbye to the space party) and I had really wanted to attend what was an hour and a half of reminiscing over the last 12 years (which I've been a part of).  After the hour of meetings I felt dizzy and so tired I told my BF to take me home.  I guess, though I felt really great in the morning, I just over did it so soon after surgery.  I still feel tired today.  I am so disappointed.  It is hitting me harder than I thought it would (missing the event).  I am sort of depressed about it today.  Probably more symbolic than I realized.  It's just been such a year... and basically it was a year ago now that I was first told that I had breast cancer.  So maybe that is why I'm feeling so tired and emotional today.

msmpatty

Lilah...I say good for you for even trying to go to the party!  Less than a week after surgery, I don't think many people (me, for one) would have even attempted it.   Just give yourself some time, you'll be back on your feet and feeling optimistic again in no time.  So set your sights on the "big blowout hello to the new space" party!  

Patty 

buccaneersdj

Jenn, Congrats on the graduation I understand your pride....it brings back memories of last year, I learned I had breast cancer the morning of my daughter and son's graduation. At first I thought I couldn't handle keeping the news to myself all day but there was no way it was going to ruin their day.... and then came the festivities and it was the ultimate distraction, I was so proud of them both; breast cancer could never take that away! {{{HUGS}}} Donna

buccaneersdj

Update: 1st annual mammo since the bad one...Radiologist: "both sides look good...see you next year"..Yeah!

Lilah

Donna -- wahooo!!!

Patty -- you're a doll   You are right!  I am already looking forward to that   Also that new avatar is adorable!

msmpatty

Lilah - The new avatar is my new "do" after visiting the hair salon yesterday...my arms aren't long enough to get the hair and the face in the frame!   Anyhoo...no more grey!   My hairdresser also gave me some pointers on how to calm down the curls and told me more eyeliner and earrings are essential for pulling off what we decided is the Mia Farrow look (think: Rosemary's Baby).   Despite all the advice...plopped my wig on this morning. HA!

Patty

Lilah

Aw petty I totally see the Mia Farrow look going on!  I love the way we can only see your eyes... very mysterious

Wear your wig if you must be really Patty you're good to go for going topless!  I've pretty much stopped wearing my wig... too much trouble and I'm kinda liking my own Mia Farrow (but with black hair).

jenn3

Patty - I love the new avatar - your hair looks great!  I really need to get my picture up.  It seems to be about like yours in the picture, it does have some length, but it's so incredibly curly it's hard to see the length.  I do get compliments on my "haircut" from strangers that don't know what I've been through - go figure. 

Lilah - I'm sorry you couldn't make the party, driving 30 miles each way, visiting and doing what you did took a lot of energy for someone who just had surgery.  But.... I get it, you're moving to a new space, it was the goodbye to the old space, seeing work friends and the year long fight with this disease. 

Donna - yes....I am so proud of my baby.  Wow, I can't imagine getting the news the day of graduation and having to hold it in.  Congrats on the good mammo news!!! Whoo Hoo!!!!

Lilah

Thanks Jenn -- as Patty said, I'll be there for the celebrate the new space party   And my boss -- a truly wonderful human being -- sat on the phone with me the next day and gave me a blow by blow description of what I missed and it made me feel almost like I was there.

buccaneersdj

Our lack of activity on this board must mean we are all somewhat enjoying getting our lives back....I booked my first cruise for October 9th.....yahoooooooooooooo!!!!!!   {{{HUGS}}} Donna

gillyone

Yes - I guess we are all doing well!!! Good ofr you Donna - and keep stretching your arm! I actually got de-ported yesterday. It was just an in-office procedure and he went in via the implantation scar. It is a bit sore - swollen and bruised but fine. Now I can't even visit the oncology nurses every month to get a port flush. Weirdly I liked going in to visit.

Lilah

Wow an in-office procedure to remove the port!  Did they knock you out or just do a local? 

gillyone

Just a local!!  Two days later it is still a little swollen and lots of bruising - but that is typical for me.I bruise very easily. Five steri-strips to come off in the shower in a few days and dissolvable stitches that will take care of themselves.

Did others have a general for de-porting?

msmpatty

Gilly - I thought I was going to have a general for de-porting, but ended up having the same office procedure you did.   Perfectly painless after the numbing shots, just some pulling sensations.   I had mine out 3 weeks ago.  The incision is healed and it isn't tender anymore.  Even at this early point it looks a whole lot better than it did when that lump of a port was in!   Did you look at the port device?  It looked huge to me.  Had I seen it before they implanted it I may have made a different decision. Yikes!

Donna - Great news on the cruise!   A friend and I are thinking of taking our boys on one in August.   

Lilah - How are you feeling?   Healing up okay?   Enjoying having boobs again? HA!

Patty

Lilah

LOL Patty -- well I only lost one of them... and had immediate reconstruction so it was never a feeling of not having any.  More a feeling of being a FREAK with one giant one and one small one... I DO love having two that are about the same size now.  The reduction side is still swollen - so still a bit larger than it should be -- but very close to the size of my implant (and I haven't gone for a proper bra fitting yet, but I think I'm going to end up a small D).  Also waiting for the bruises to completely heal -- at the moment my reduction breast is a sort of greenish-yellow (horrible color) ... but I gather this is normal considering that the week after surgery it was dark purple!  I for some reason bruised massively there.  Oh the joy of BC.

Gilly -- so cool that it was a local and no more anesthesia!  I hope mine is that way too.  I will have to have it til I am done with Herceptin in the fall, though.  Sigh.

Off to Atlantic City for the long weekend -- so I'll catch up with you all when I'm back!

buccaneersdj

Gill, Congrats on the deporting...someday I will get deported too..lol! My surgeon also said it will be an in office with local procedure. Onc wants me to wait a year, I don't know if that means a year from diagnosis or a year PFC?? I'll have to remember to ask her that one! I bet we are all coming up on some cancerversaries (if thats how you spell it) Mine is June 3rd! {{{HUGS}}} Donna

msmpatty

Lilah - Sorry about the bruising!   I had almost none this time around, but I had a two lumpectomies in college (both B9) and turned all kinds of vivid colors after those.  Greenish-yellow is good...almost over!

Donna - Yes!  Happy cancerversary to you and everyone else coming up.   Mine passed in May and I didn't even realize it until it was already over.  Man...what a year, huh?

Patty

weety

I  haven't really had a chance to get up to date with everything until today.   It looks like lots of us are coming up to/just passed our cancerversaries!  YAY!!!!  I'm just still so scared that I can't think straight sometimes.  Does anyone else experience the intense fear anymore? I hate it! 

Lilah, Congratulations on  the reconstruction!  I still don't know what I'm going to do.  In my case, since I am so small, it is more of an annoyance than anything else.  I usually just wear my A cup bra empty on the one side.  The annoying part is that because there is no boob to keep it down, it just tends to work it's way up and then I find the top of it peeking out of my shirts.  It's not a big deal, but definately annoying.  I just don't know if it's enough reason to reconstruct.  I've never really had cleavage or boobs anyways. . . I'll probably give it a year.. . maybe I'll be in a better frame of mind next summer.

Congrats also on all the port removals!  I had a PICC line during chemo and got that out when chemo was done. 

Have a great holiday weekend everyone!

jenn3

I haven't checked in for a while, but wanted to check in and say hello to everyone. 

Gill/Patty - Congrats for having the port removed.

Lilah - have a great weekend - sounds like lots of fun.

Donna - Whoo Hoo and Yipeeeeeeeee - for the cruise.  If I forget when the time comes I'm saying it now - have a great time.

Weety - I'm still "getting there" with reconstruction - I'll be having DEIP.  I visited with one PS, he was okay, but I want to visit with a few more.  I'm meeting with two others, both trained by Dr. Allen (created the DIEP).  Hopefully, I'll like one of them.

Next month will be my cancerversary, not sure how I'm feeling about it - happy to be where I am, but finding that I just want it to go away and never have happened.  Guess it's all part of the emotional roller coaster we're on.

gillyone

It's probably been asked many times on many threads - how are you counting cancerversary? From finding lump, diagnosis, surgery????

gillyone

Patty - yes I did look at the port after it was removed. I was shocked at how long the tube was! As Patty and I both said, with the numbing, it is a painless procedure, but a bit weird as the doc has to snip away at scar tissue that attaches itself to the port. So it takes a bit of time and the port looked a bit gross when he showed it me. Five days after removal it is no longer tender but does look bad as I have a lot of bruising - normal for me. (You should have seen me after I had my wisdom teeth out!!!!)

jenn3

Gill - I've really thought about it and decided that I would start at 06/12 - mammogram date, the date that led to 06/19 - diagnosis and 06/25 - surgery, 08/07 start of chemo 12/18 end of chemo. For me all of these dates stick out in my mind and I couldn't decide where to go, so I decided on the where I started 06/12.  I guess it's whatever date really sticks out in your mind as the date that started it all or has the most impact on you. 

weety

I think I will go by either the date I found it (4th of July weekend) or date of diagnosis (July 17th).  I probably will go by the latter, because that is the first day that I KNEW for positive that it was cancer.  I feel like that is when my journey officially began.  I agree with Jenn, though, choose the date that seems to be the most significant in your mind.

What date is everyone else using?