chemo & divorce...wisdom please :)

suez219

I'm handling both well, considering all the changes.  I have 2 sons (19 & 22) who live with me.  I've just completed 6 of 8 chemo treatments.  The first 4, was the red stuff (ACT?).  Now I'm on Taxol. 1 month of rads. in July.  Boobs still intact but somewhat scarred.  Bald as can be.  I have lots of friends, (99% married).  Anyone have any advice?  I have a nice wig and love to laugh.  I'm looking for a male friend kinda thing,  I was with my husband for 28 years.  Married for 22 of them.  I'm sooo not ready for anything more than feeling like a strong, capable, attractive 51 year old woman again.

Thanks in advance-

Sue Z.

my3girls

Hi Sue,

Not sure if I can give you any wisdom...but I will try. I can very much relate to your story. I was married for over 22 yrs (3 daughters from my ex). Remarried 5 mos before my dx..and long story short..he proved to me a real A$$, and not at all the man I thought he was..and he left just weeks after my dx.  Note..I am much better off!!

So, having given you that info...I can talk about the man/dating/friend thing. Do you have any male friends at all that you can hang out with?  I know for me, I didn't, except a few at work. Also, most of my girlfriends are all married as well.  Once my hair started coming back in, and I had my reconstruction done, I started feeling better about myself. So, last July...I went on a dating website...and went out with a few guys from there. I actually got into a 6 mon. relationship. 

You know in your heart that you are a strong, capable and attractive YOUNG woman!! Maybe check out a free dating website and sign up to just look for Male FRIENDS.  One to visit is  Plenty of Fish .com....I am actually seeing a few guys from there right now.

Where do you live? I am in Ohio and just about your age..49 +. If you feel up to making new friends..go for it girl..you deserve to experience it all..and be happy and lively again!

Talk soon!

Lisa

konakat

Another site you might consider is lavalife.  They have 3 profile types -- just friends, looking for a relationship, just sex (or something like that).  You can create a profile for each type, depending on what you're looking for.

What I loved (I have a bf now) about meeting people through these sites, once you weed through the creeps (most have creep painted on their forehead and it isn't hard to weed them out), the people you meet are generally very nice.  Their profiles list hobbies so you can find someone that has interests similar to yours.  If you meet someone and don't click, there aren't hard feelings, you just try the next person.  I have quite a few friends (40s, 50s) that are enjoying meeting people online too -- I say give it a shot!