Lets get to know each other :)

NoH8

I've missed you Laura.

Golf, what do you store the ashes in? Little One's came in a tiny box-- but since I had a house fire last year I want to get something that won't burn in case of fire...

We've gotten awfully quiet here....

Lovegolf

Yeah those tiny boxes are not that good.  We have one in a wooden Chinese incense box and the in an old ginger jar.  Neither of these are fire proof. 

It was been quiet.  I am going back to Dr. today and I know she is going to drain off more fluid.  Had it done 10days ago too.  after last visit i have been so good, not picking up anything over 5 lbs. etc now I wonder if i should just go ahead and start working out to push fluid through.  Have had acupuncture 3 times and that helps.  I feel so good after that I could go to sleep.  Everyone keeps saying you so good hard to believe you have had major surgery....amazing what keep a good tan does.  I am starting to realize I had major surgery i made it through but still major.  I was reading Mx path report the other day. There is wording in there "nipple unremarkable".  I thought to myself, might be unremarkable to you but I had taken them on one hell  of a tour for the 47 years I had them..( i know that is Dr. speak for nipple not scarred or anything), but one some level it pissed me off.

saw a t-shirt on a breast cancer site that said"Hell yeah they fake the real tried to kill me"  I laughed out loud.  If I had fake one I would have to have the shirt.  NoH8 how long was it before your skin quit burning like? 

Got to run hope to hear from everyone else soon.

TorchSong

Hi all--

Real life just gets in the way sometimes...!

No decision on the church, Golf--the congregation is meeting in July to decide, but I'm "exploring other options," as they say, just in case.

I'm more and more at ease with the change in relationship with my ex--had dinner with her on Friday and it was OK. And I've even found myself cruising women again...!! Now I know I'm getting over it!

Nex weekend--the 19-20th--is the Relay for Life here. I'm planning on writing names on my t-shirt--all my online friends who can't be here but supported me. My ex is actually going to try to come to the Relay for Life next weekend and walk with me as my caregiver for the Survivor's Lap--since she was the one who walked with me through some of the worst of it (surgery, first chemo, and for me, hair loss and mood swings), not to mention the clueless oncologist (when I asked if my partner could come in to discuss treatment options, he asked what "his" name was; I replied Steph, he said, Steve? This went on for a couple of exchanges until the nurse finally said, "I'll go get her..."). lol

Feeling pretty good--although I get tired more quickly than I think I will, and have over-scheduled myself a couple of times. I just feel like I should be able to do more than I can. But my hair is coming back nicely, which means more than it probably should.

Wow, this is long...

Hope everyone is well!

Martha

Lovegolf

Martha

If you are cruising women then that is great sign...You are back and getting your life back too.  Take it easy on the over working. I understand the desire. I just keep wanting my life back to normal ASAP.  Did get more fluid drained this week.  Until that stops I am on restriction from Dr. and partner; no lifting more than 5 pounds, no golf....

Good luck with the church issues I alway tell folks you think politics are nasty try church politics.

I love the Relay for life idea.  Wish i could be there 

Ab

TorchSong

Hi Ab--well, I think it's a good sign!

Hope your healing continues. I hear you about back to normal...whatever that is!

And hey, Happy Pride Month, everyone! Stonewall was 40 years ago. How far we have come and how far we have to go...

Martha

NoH8

I never had any problems with excess fluid after my mastectomies. How do they drain the fluid? That t-shirt is hysterical, omg I love it!.

Martha- I went to a relay for life before, they're really special. I know the feeling of being glad your hair is coming back. For a while it seemed like the hair in my front wouldn't come back and then I worried it would always feel like pubic hair. Thank goodness that wasn't true.

Today is a year from the fire. It's raining buckets and if it had been like that last year, I would have never had the fire, but there are no do overs. Looking back I can't believe how much life changed for me over the past year. It's also one year to the day one of my favorite people, Tim Russert, died. He was such a great man and he made following politics so exciting. He would have loved to see the past election and Barack's inauguration. He was such a great student and teacher of American history.

Lovegolf

They drain it with a needle...take picture and guide needle. Yeah loved the shirt..They have lots of good one.  I am going to have this done I guess every 10 days or so....for awhile.

dswope

Hi again everyone,

Golf, sorry I haven't responded....I've been in a bit of a funk, not wanting to talk to anyone.  Feeling too sorry for myself!  I also am having to have fluid drained from my right breast area.  Today will make the third time.  I'm not sure why they took the drain out so soon.  I developed a hematoma the week after the mast. (on my left side)  My partner rushed me back to the emerg. room.  They had to open me up again to try and get rid of all the blood, so it's taken a little longer to heal.  I'm finally back to work.  I find I get tired quickly, however that may have something to do with the fact that I have done next to nothing for a month!  I'm waiting on the oncotype test now to determine the next step. Thanks for asking.

Deb

Lovegolf

Deb

sorry you are having hard time...i know the fluid build up SUCKs but we can ge through it.  I go back in the AM to have saline injected then drained.  Salt shoould help pullout fluid. Hope the oncotype does not require too much. Hang in there we can do this.  

I still get tired some too and it is beensix weeks, but it is getting better. Let us hear from you.  You are alone..folks are here.

Ab

dee1961

Hi ladies,

I feel the same as you Deb.  I just can't get with it anymore and can't get out of this depression. I've just been lurking around here and reading everyones posts.

Take care,

Dee 

NoH8

Deb that sounds so scary!

Ab- it takes a LONG time for all the anesthesia to get out of your body and your body is still healing, It needs time to rest and restore the energy to continue to heal. Be patient with yourself. In my personal experience, overdoing it means the healing takes longer.

Dee- I got really depressed after I was done with treatment. For the surgery and chemo I was on overdrive, hypervigalent about taking care of fighting cancer. Once tx ended I crashed and was depress for quite a while. Therapy and meds helped a LOT.

TorchSong

My port is out! Had it out yesterday, with a lot of struggle--apparently it was adhering to my vein... Anyway, it's out, so that's one more step out of treatment!

Deb what a hard row to hoe...

Be good to yourself, everyone--BC is tough and we are amazing!

Doing the Relay for Life this weekend--all but two members of the team are "members of the team." And there are at least two other teams are totally made up of lesbians. Woot! Have I mentioned how much I love Canada?

Hugs to all

Martha

NoH8

I bet you're glad to have that port out! The removal was weird. I bet you're glad not to have that huge bump sticking out of your skin. I saved my port-- I told the surgeon I wanted it back. I'm glad I never saw the thing before it went it because it's scary to think of that inside my veins!

I love canada too---the USA could use some lessons on civil and human rights from you guys.

Lovegolf

Martha

So glad your port is out.  Enjoy th Relay or Life...maybe it is good place to cruise chics...

I know I am still healing.  Got right side drained againthis week and go back next.  If not better she is going to inject salt water in site and then place a drain back in.  Will see.  Canada is so far ahead on many issue healthcare, gay rights...although Obama signed for same sex benefits for gov't employees.  That's a step

dswope

Hi all,

Torch,  when I consider all you have been through I feel guilty for feeling so sorry for myself.  I guess it's all relative.  Happy you got rid of the port finally!  I'm lucky to not even know what it is used for!   The drains were enough for me.  You have such a positive attitude, you inspire me to keep plugging along.

What I need to do is focus on the positive things about all this!!!!  Really though, I'm lucky to have an employeer that offers really good insurance.  They've paid for the gene test and for the oncotype.  I understand both of those are around $3000.00, and are not covered by a lot of companies.   

And, I'm a grandma for the first time!  A healthy baby boy.

Golf,  the phys. asst. at my docs office told me the same thing about re-inserting the drain.  I've had fluid removed 3 times and I believe it's stopped draining now.  I refuse to let them cut me again!  I'd rather have them stick the needle in there.  I wonder why they think they need to put the drain back in?  I didn't have the saline injected into me, maybe that's the difference.

I had to laugh when I read about the possibility of "cruising chics" at the Relay for Life.  I am such an old stay at home married lady, I hadn't heard that phrase in ages!  Thanks for the giggle!

Dee, I'm sorry you're feeling low.  I know this would have been much more difficult for me if I hadn't had the option of an anti-depressant.  It isn't always the answer, however it might be an option for you.  I'm pretty sure it's fairly normal to get so caught up in this crap that there sometimes seems like it will never end, and there's no way out. 

Big hugs to you all!

Deb    

NoH8

Congrats on becoming a grandmother Deb! When was he born?

Golf- looking closer at just how few benefits same sex couples are getting from the federal gov. left me disappointed.I can't wait until doma gets repealed. It's so frustrating, like running on a treadmill.

Martha- did you pick anyone up at the relay LOL.

TorchSong

LOL No, we were too busy staying out of the rain!

We had a torrential downpour--off and on--and we were cancelled. The walk part anyway. We did have the opening ceremonies, including the Survivor's Lap, nad the luminaris were lit... But we couldn't do the visiting around from site to site. At about 11, the tenters were sent home because of the amount of water on the ground and all the walkers were cleared from the track, because of lightning.

Some of us stayed and we had a great time playing women-oriented pictionary and eating wings!

 Hope everyone had a great weekend!

Hugs

Martha

dee1961

Hi all,

I did the relay Friday night starting with a survivors dinner at a local church. There were 425 at the dinner and I am not sure how many turned out for the relay but it was packed. I have to say the weather was HOT & HUMID! A lot of people couldn't stay due to the conditions. It was also pride weekend here so I went downtown for that Saturday. Great fun!    Tired and burnt but all in all a great weekend. I hope you all are well.

Take care,

Dee 

Lovegolf

Deb

Was glad to hear about your grandson..and yeah it is been 10 years since I was cruising so I am out of it too. I go back Wed and I know they are going to drain me.she will put a small drain back in at her office. Will see.  I am still holding fluid on right and now some on left. 

Martha

Sorry about the rain bu sounds like you made the best of it.

Dee I am sure between Pride and Walk you had great weekend

Lovegolf

Deb Was glad to hear about your grandson..and yeah it is been 10 years since I was cruising so I am out of it too. I go back Wed and I know they are going to drain me.she will put a small drain back in at her office. Will see.  I am still holding fluid on right and now some on left. 

MarthaSorry about the rain bu sounds like you made the best of it.

Dee I am sure between Pride and Walk you had great weekend

NoH8

Hi All! I think I'd rather have pouring rain than hot and humid-- I have developed a no tolerance for that kind of weather.I get sick to my stomach and violent headaches.... guess I better move!

Lovegolf

Ok you guys are wimps  it was over 100 here for the weekend...this is more like July August.  It was "cooled" down to more normal 93 ....but hey I NEVER shovel snow. I did go to Chicago the first on Dec last year and has there for 1st snow. It was lovely-- lighted up for x-mas. I went shopping for my partner on Michigan Ave.. Please send more positve thoughts...my partner ended up in ER with cheest pain etc.  We are seeing cadio guy Friday She saw her PCP today who said could have been slight heart attack or she stressed an old muscle pull at the back of shoulder.  I am holding out for shoulder....If is heart I am sure she is going to need to have angioplasty.  We have been together 10 years. Her daughter whio is 30 is great. She has known me all her life.  She walked in in Atlanta Pride few years ago.  She got married 10/13/08 and we are waitng on grandkid that has 2 legs.

Sorry do not mean to be so down  just scared.  We have been talking about getting married, not the GA will care...but maybe.  I said I would hold out until GA came around will we both may be died if ever it comes...Maybe be could travel to Windsor and Martha could do it.  Who knows I can get through what is left for me, but I need her too.

TorchSong

Lovegolf, Hang in there! Positive thoughts, prayers, vibes going up for the shoulder! Hugs and hugs... and i would be  proud to officiate at yoru wedding!

holtbolt

.Let's help one of the good guys win for once!! Will you help a bc sister by voting today?

http://www.aeroforceone.com/index.cfm/pk/view/cd/NAA/cdid/1177058/pid/1175576

NoH8

I am the biggest weather wimp ever!

Golf, I'm sorry to hear about your future wife's health problems. I hope you'll keep us posted. I'm thinking happy positive thoughts for her. Please keep us posted. Scary stuff.

I adopted a new kitten yesterday. Monkey is 11 weeks old and a lovebug. There isn't a lot of hissing from the other cats, but they are avoiding him and shooting me daggers as if to  say WHY AMY? LOL.

TorchSong

Golf, how your honey doing?

Amy, that is too funny. As I type this, one of mine is sitting under the table lamp, baking her brain. Cats are strange creatures.

Lovegolf

Well she aced her stress test and does not have blockages in blood supply.  We are getting more tests results today.  She may have infectin around her heart....is feeling better, but still sacred.This has atleast slowed her down. 

Amy congrats on the new baby......I am looking forward to nice long weekend floating in the pool.

NoH8

I haven't been hear for a while because things are crazy. Right after I posted about Monkey, I had to take him back to the spca for treatment. He was drooling something awful and sneezing up a storm. He has a virus that causes ulcers on his tongue, which caused the drooling. He's been there a week and I've been there every day to visit him. He's finally out of the woods, his drooling has stopped and his eyes look a lot clearer. I've been spending about an hour a day with him and today was the first day he purred and was playful. 

Golf, I was in a chatroom the other day and there was a woman with a pink ribbon on her profile named LuvGolf--- I assumed it was you and I started saying -- we know each other.... well it wasn't you, but it was pretty funny. I guess I should have realized that you're not the only breast cancer suurvivor who loves golf LOL.

What did ya'll think about Obama's speech to the LGBTs at the white house at the end of June? I liked what he said about how we'll feel at the end of his presidency, but since that'll be 8 years away-- I want things to start happening. What I find ironic is that the speech took place the day before Lt. Choi's hearing and I think Obama could have done something by executive order--- calling a halt to DADT ousters until congress has time to repeal DADT.  We need strides, not baby steps.

TorchSong

I'm ambivalent about what's happened, Amy--the proclamation of Pride Month and the reception are historic, no doubt about it... But I'd like to see something substantive now. As you say, very ironic about Lt. Choi.

I guess we'll see. I know that any change requires political manuvering, but there are things he could by executive order. 

Here's hoping!

NoH8

We share the same sentiments Torch! I love Obama and am thrilled with a lot of what he's done so far. Of course, I don't like that he's walking on egg shells around the conservative minority. I understand and laud the need for bipartisanship, but there are some things that are not open for compromise and civil rights is first on that list. I guess because our expectations are so high we want more. If Bush had given us our month.... that would have been more to celebrate (after someone got the smelling salts). Nothing Obama does rin favor our civil rights will be shockingly wonderful, since we desever and expect this. That's not an negative, but a positive that rights are coming soon.