Starting Chemo April 2009

Karma76

My sister started her chemo today.  so far so good, she feels good.  She laughed a lot and the nurse was awesome.  She has 4 AC every 2 weeks and 12 weeks of taxol....so one down!!!!!  She felt semi queezy but got right on top of it and now feels good.  Resting up!

Lena

Hmmmm, OK, I survived my first chemo (yesterday 4/9/08) a lot better than I thought (er, well, so far). My Pack Rat was able to come with me for the treatment too, and stayed overnight with me (he left at noon this afternoon). And much to my shocked surprise, I only peed red once (while still at the treatment center), AND....I even had both the energy and desire to make love with him last night (this after ravishing him when he got here Tuesday night and again on Wednesday too!)! Nausea -- nope, but after dinner (yeah, I actually was hungry at dinner time) -- a couple hours after eating, my stomach felt a little weird -- not quite queasy, definitely not full blown nausea, just weird -- since I'm so horrified of nausea, I picked up my little bottle of Compazine and took one -- I'm not going to mess with that! And I felt fine. I've had the "weird" stomach twice today, but took the Compazine again and also had started this Kytol stuff my chemo nurse called into my pharmacy for me when she visited me during my infusion (we picked it up after treatment yesterday).

Today I'm kind of tired though (and brain dead). I wanted to take a nap around 1 this afternoon but had to stay up to go get a Neulasta shot at 2:30. The nurse who gave me that said I might feel achy, "bone pain" in a couple days, but if I do, take Tylenol. OK, I've got that. I finally got to take my nap -- after dinner, I actually fell asleep! Woke up at 8 PM, but now I'm getting tired again, so since it's close to bedtime, that's probably a good thing. I was afraid I'd end up awake all night!

Brushing my teeth 3x a day with Biotene toothpaste and using the Biotene mouthwash too. Also taking L-Gutamine for additional anti-drymouth, and chewed a couple pieces of gum today. Actually also drank a couple glasses of water too. I'm not much of a water drinker...I'm a morning coffee fiend, in the afternoons and evenings I drink tea (herbal if it's after 8 PM). I love prune juice too, had bought it in my original "Chemo Survival Supplies" shopping trip in the event the anti-nausea meds made me constipated (so I could knock out two birds with one stone: liquid to drink against drymouth plus help for my bowels), but if anything was making it harder on my bowels, it's the darn Caltrate my chemo nurse told me to take to strengthen my bones -- I wasn't exactly constipated, it was just that BMs were notably firmer than usual -- I could still go, but not as easily or quickly! LOL. Eating some prunes (which I like as much or more than the juice) helped on that end a bit, but funny thing, now that I'm on the chemo, plus having taken the anti-nausea meds (which I had read elsewhere on this forum tended to induce constipation), and still taking the Caltrate. I haven't had any problems with BMs. Hope it stays this way!

Well I'm in my jammies, ready for bed. I hope my brain comes back tomorrow, because I'm going to need it!

How are the rest of you doing?

inthemoment

Hi Tammy,

My hair was moderately short to start with, although I did get it cut even shorter before I went for the wig fitting.  I don't know how long your hair is now, or if you are planning on a wig with longer hair, but I felt that regardless of what wig style I chose, I would still have to get used to being bald, and wanted the supershort cut to ease myself into that...just my opinion.  If you do get your hair cut short before your fitting, bring a picture of how your hair normally is worn if you want to have the wig look similar to it.  Don't forget, we are wearing the wig duriing the summer and you want to keep this in mind for length.

Geri

florbo

sandlee 79--hang in there, think positive thoughts.  the anticipation was worse than the infusion itself and the effects.  remember to drink, drink , drink.

Believe 1 --

I was feeling the same way after having my mastectomy and recon 6 weeks before having chemo! I felt almost 90% then felt shot down again.  After the Neulasta shot put me out of commission last Monday-Wed, I am feeling almost normal.  Keep us posted. 

annadou

 Tammy -Get the wig sorted before-I have got a variety of stuff to see what suits . Im also going to save some hair after the chop- maybe can make a fringe to fit in a headscarf .

Everyone -any hair tips welcome

Good luck to all having Tx today and dont eat anything you really like after the chemo -you are never gonna eat it again

Anna 

Anonymous

Tammy - I definitely recommend cutting your hair short before treatment for a few reasons.  I had long hair, past my shoulders, that I have been growing (or, rather, had been) for the last couple of years and it was finally highlighted the right way, etc.  It was becoming a point of upset for me that I knew I couldn't stand watching it fall it while long.  So, one of the more traumatic days was getting it cut into a pixie.  I ordered wigs around the same time, after trying some on but not having any good local wig shops, I found a company online and ordered two that were similar in color and length of my hair before I cut it.  They arrived last week and I have an appointment to get them cut and styled a little better with the wig specialist who comes to the Cancer Society near us.  I want to get them cut a little shorter, because now that I have been living with very short hair, and will be for a while after I finish treatment in June, I thought the long hair on the wigs looked fake.  So, I'll compromise and have them styled a little shorter than my original hair. 

I had my first treatment on 4/2 and haven't had hair loss yet, but with it cut short now into a style I really don't like, it's made it easier not to care so much about it, and come to the "yes, its only hair, it will grow back" state of mind that I could not do earlier.  The wigs will fit easier if your hair is short, too.  I did try some on prior to the cut, and it was hard to tell how they fit.  Now, when the time comes to shave it off, I'll be mentally ready - and actually, I'll be cutting off any other damage that's been done over the years with color, highlights, etc.  Fresh start!!

Good luck on the 20th - know that we are all here with you!

Anonymous

Woke up this morning really feeling the Neulasta - cripes - it felt like nails being driven into my hips!!  I took some tylenol and used a heating pad for about 2 hours.  Hobbling around now, but need to keep moving or it stoves up.  Only thing that makes it bearable, I guess, is that if we didn't feel it, then we wouldn't know it was getting our bone marrow to step it up!

Have a good day, ladies.  And yes, that's great advice about prepping what you will eat during your days 1-4, possibly 5 on from treatment.  You will more than likely lose your taste for anything but bland bland bland.  I am just now (9 days from treatment) wanting to even look at things I ate prior to treatment, and can taste them.  But, at first, even the thought of certain foods was enough to put me off!!  Now, I want my fruits and vegetables again, spicier foods (though, gotta watch the heartburn) and other stuff that last weekend, oh, no way could I have even imagined!

ikat

Geri.

 Thank you so much for the wig information. I will make an appointment. I was trying to figure out how to PM you but I must have pre-chemo brain, because I can"t figure that one out (i'll give it a try later)....Park Ridge Wig is maybe 15 min from my house.

You had asked what I do I work at a local College, in one of the offices.  I really like it there.  It's nice being around so many young people (keep you up with the times)  My son told me that I should go for a blue Mohawk ...Not..I have no ear plugs to go with it (that's a big thing on campus) but I might go with his suggestion of drawing eyes on the back of my head. Make them think I have tattoos.  I wonder how long it really takes for the hair to grow back in. I think you are right a wig during the summer month may be unbearable.

Hope you sleep well, and are having a great day.

kathy 

Nadine54

Just dropping in to wish everyone a Happy Easter!  And have something you may enjoy and make you laugh....laughter sometimes seems a little short right now.  This is pretty funny and sure made my day, hope it helps yours.   http://carolynspreciousmemories.com/Videos/kids_artlinkletter.html

---

Lena

Chelev and Tammy -- about the hair thing, Oh sweeties, am I ever sooo with you on that one! *hugs* I cordially invite the two of you to join me in my Pity Party! -- and this goes for anyone and everyone else here who loved their hair, particularly if it was long (mine was only an inch or two shy of waist length -- the ONLY thing I didn't like about my hair was that it would never grow down to my BUTT! 

Because of the fact that I can't freakin' STAND the sight of myself with short hair (for me, MINIMUM "presentable" hair length is just past the shoulders)..and don't wanna think about bald, hell, I don't even think bald looks good on young MEN who are otherwise handsome but who shave their heads to look "trendy" -- I knew I was going to HAVE TO to do something about the upcoming chemo hair loss issue, and do it BEFORE I even started my chemo! I mean, my chemo nurse told me it would take 3-6 weeks, approximately, for my hair to start falling out from the chemo. Once I'm actually bald though, the wig will be on for all my waking hours short of being in the shower. UGGH the idea of being bald just makes me SICK.

Last Saturday my friend Kym and I went wig shopping. Found two wigs of acceptable length -- a less expensive quickie which I could get immediately, and I was also fitted for a really nice custom wig which i'll have in a month -- but that's OK, since I got one I could wear right away. Not wanting to be seen in public with really short hair, we went back to my apartment and Kym cut my hair short -- a "transitional" cut, not a super short military buzz cut (that's what my chemo nurse had suggested but I couldn't bear to do it) or actually shaving my head -- so Kym cut it to neck length. I saved the long hair that got cut, but not to do anything with it, just to save it because I couldn't bear to throw it out. I'll probably keep it until -- if I live long enough -- my real hair grows back post-treatment to where it was originally. Kind of like a little kid's "security blanket." Anyway, I askd her to cut my hair in the living room because I knew I wouldn't be able to stand to watch her do it in the bathroom in front of the mirror-- I knew I'd have to go into the bathroom and look in the mirror eventually, but by that time it'd be "too late." I did hear the snip-snip of the scissors of course while she was cutting, and was teary eyed, but managed not to totally burst into tears until I saw it. Yes, I am UG-LEE now. Today is my one week anniversary of UG-LEE. Kym doesn' share my aversion to short hair and she even told me that even though my long hair had been beautiful, I still looked CUTE in short hair! :-O Well, this is a matter of "agree to disagree" -- we are all entitled to our opinions, aren't we? 

So after the haircut I had to practice putting my wig on too, because there was no way I was going to so much as open my apartment door without it now that my hair is so horribly short (and on the way to gone altogether). I have a hard time putting it on (lacking fine motor skills I lost in a stroke 15 years ago), but I can do it. This wig (my quickie wig) looks fine on me -- it's not exactly the right color, i.e., not MY actual haircolor, but the color still matches my skin tone and eye color to look good on me, but IMO it looks a thousand times better on me than my short hair, so I can make myself presentable if I have to leave my apartment. My custom wig actually is my real color, so when I get that, so much the better. Neither wig is as long as my real hair was, but both are halfway down my back, which I can live with easily.

Alas, though, I may still have to get the military buzz cut (or even, horrors, get my head shaved prior to next treatment) after all. But I might find it easier to do now because I already hate how I look without my wig. See, even though I can put the wig on and look nice with it, I think I still have "too much" hair for the wig cap, and if I had less hair, or no hair, it would not only go on faster/easier, but stay on longer (it often tends to slip after a few hours). I only put it on if I need to leave my apartment, but once I do put it on, I like to keep it on as long as it'll stay on my head.

Anyway -- after the initial practice runs last weekend, I've worn my wig a few times when I had to leave my apartment (including to the cancer center for my first chemo -- my chemo nurse said it looked nice on me too, and even though Kym thinks I'm cute with short hair she does agree that the wig is very pretty on me). Another "agree to disagree" case too -- my Pack Rat thinks I'm totally overreacting to the short hair too...I can't sleep in the wig so had to take it off for that, I said, well, if you can still stand to look at me....uh, let me hug you again while I'm still pretty -- we hugged, I took the wig off and he said I was being silly about the hair! LOL, I guess this must be a "girl thing" huh?

Anyway  :::::shudder::::: I'm thinking now that without my wig on I've been UG-LEE for a whole week now (and no, short hair is not really worth the lower maintenance: showers take 15 minutes less time than they used toand I've only needed to use maybe 1/5th as much shampoo and conditioner as I did for my long hair), maybe early this week, unless I get more debilitating side effects from my chemo (I've hardly had any yet, and nothing my meds haven't been able to fix so far) -- I'm thinking of actually taking a walk over to the Scissors Happy Hairdresser I stopped going to for split ends trims several years ago and getting either the buzz cut or my head shaved. I kind of shudder to have to do this in a public place, but Kym is only a hair amateur (she was doing my split ends trims after I stopped going to Ms. Scissors Happy, and she was good enough to be able to do a general short haircut like she gave me last week -- I need to stress to you all it's not that Kym actually gave me a bad haircut, it's just that I don't like how I look with short hair!), but for something like a buzz cut or outright head shaving I'm thinking I should go to a professional. Anyway...I can put on my wig for the trip out, take it off for the buzz cut (or head shave), and then put it back on to go home...and hope the place isn't too crowded!

Never having had cancer before, everything I'm doing to deal with the hair business is all coming from my chemo nurse and women in this forum who've been through it themselves. Everyone with experience seems to strongly agree that it's way less emotionally disturbing (and less messy) to get rid of most or all of your hair BEFORE it actually starts falling out of your head from the chemo. I shudder to think my chemo nurse and all these women here could be right, because I'm finding this plenty damn traumatic and disturbing!

Ummmm, taking a poll here for curiosity -- presuming I stay well enough to go out this week, what do you ladies think: should I go from neck length to a buzz cut as a slower and hopefully emotionally easier transition, or get it all 'done and over with' (get my head shaved)?

Anna, a question if I may: now that I've started my chemo, what am I supposed to eat -- food I DON'T like?

I happen to love Italian food (among other things), and so does my Pack Rat...when I came home from my first treatment and I was actually HUNGRY (something I NEVER expected to happen on chemo at all: I'd been expecting to barely have enough appetite to get a bare minimum amount of nutrition down me so I wouldn't die of starvation), I was so happy my Pack Rat (who also loves Italian food) wanted to order in some Italian dinner for us. He had an onions sausages and peppers wrap, and I had tossed salad, eggplant parmigiana -- and CHEESECAKE for dessert, too! We each also had a glass of rose wine with our dinner, too. It was wonderful. Look, the way I see this whole chemo and cancer thing, it's HELL -- so if there's any possibility at all of being able to enjoy ANYTHING at all here and there while we endure it, IMO that's an opportunity NOT to lose! Perhaps, as my chemo progresses (one round down, five to go), my taste buds will eventually "shrivel up and die" for awhile, or I'll lose my appetite and only barely be able to force myself to drink the Ensure or eat the oatmeal, soup or canned fruit I bought just in case, but without being prescient, I don't know how anyone can consider anything less than enjoying what's possible, while it's still possible to enjoy, and if later on things start to suck worse than they already do, deal with it as it comes.

Yeah I did preparatory research, bought anti-side effect stuff/got compazine and atavan prescriptions filled before starting chemo, prepped my laptop so I can lay in bed and play my Sims if I'm too weak or tired to sit up at my desktop, at least started to deal with the hair business before it falls out because one need not have precognition to know the chemo WILL make it fall out -- but none of us can know everything, exactly how OUR bodies will react and when. Someone in another area of the forum said her mother (who had IBC, which is what I have) ate fine all the way through treatment (I believe the phrase used was "she ate like a little piggie" or something like that). Maybe my appetite and still functional taste buds won't last, but for now if I can eat OK and enjoy it, I'll go with it. I still have the Ensure, soup, oatmeal, canned fruit and so on here ready and waiting if I lose my desire or ability to eat normally. I'm not eating like a pig, but I'm eating normally for me so far (1-2 meals a day). And unlike that lady's mother (who threw up once because she chose not to take her anti-nausea meds), I take my compazine immediately if my stomach starts to feel "funny" -- I'm not letting myself GET anywhere near nauseous if I can help it!

Mmmm. My next oncologist appointment (and blood workup) is for 4/20/09, next round of chemo is 4/30/09. 

Good luck everybody! Hope you're feeling as OK as you can, and please, because this whole business sucks to hell, if it's even remotely possible given your bodies' reactions to your chemo cocktails -- TRY TO ENJOY ANYTHING YOU CAN! 

Off to brush and gargle with Biotene now...

~Lena.

Anonymous

Lena, you are so funny!  I agree - the hair issue, and getting the first chemo treatment were what had me freaked out so badly too.  Everyone who I've either sent photos too (I must be a masochist!) or who sees me loves the pixie cut, with the exception of myself and my husband.  I don't know if they're saying it to be nice or if it does look okay, but I'm with you - ugh!  But, I would advise you to at least get it cut shorter, to both deal with the fact that it will fall out (hard to come to terms with, but once you're over it, you're over it), and to fit your wigs on better now.

I have been eating like a pig too - well, once my appetite came back on day 4 following treatment.  My brother, a nurse, says to keep eating to keep up my suffering immune system, and do lots of protein and carbs.  My doc warned not to put on weight.  I ate well the night of chemo, but had wicked heartburn from garlic bread, and then my appetite went into bland food mode, so we went back to the store and got things like rice pudding, chicken (for some reason I was craving it) and I hardboiled eggs, etc.  Now, it's back to normal and I am eating regular foods, at least until the next treatment on the 23rd, but I'll know what to expect, more or less, and will be prepared for 4 days of ugh and then start coming back to normal.

Nadine54

Lena:  I had long  beautiful hair years ago.  Little by little for some unknown stupid reason I started having it shorter and shorter...this past summer I had it short.  It was so easy to care for, cool and great when I was riding my motorcycles.  Then as I always seem to do I decided no more short hair I want it long again.  My poor husband has seen every hairstyle there is I believe over the years and when I told him I was growing it long long again he was so happy.  Well the damn cancer had other ideas...I had my mast and figured I was home free.  NOPE, now comes chemo.  And the Onc says what???Loose my hair also???? Poor doc (NOT) when I asked WTF!  I was told by the doc's and family experiences that the hair was going to go.  Now my deal was I am growing it (trying to) and in a matter of days I may wake up with hair every where.  So a few mornings ago I felt this weird feeling in my hair.  Hubby was home and I had planned on telling him I felt it was time to shave the head.  Nope, call me weak, I didn't say a word.  Later that day I called one of my daughters who is also fighting another kind of cancer and has lost her hair many times and asked what do I do...after a good ass chewing and more tears that could fill a ocean in its self I knew the time had came to cut all of the hair off.  During this day I had just enough hair to make a pony tail and as you can imagine it felt so good.  My last day of hair and by darn I was going to do it my way.  A couple anxiety pills later I was able to get myself under control and tell hubby take it off.  Hubby is Marine, so he knew what I was saying.  I closed my eyes and off the hair fell.  My fears were to open my eyes and hate what I saw.  What if I opened my eyes and had a odd shaped head or who knows what.  After all was done I slowly opened my eyes and asked for a mirror, took a deep breath and looked...damn I didn't look half bad at all.  I had hubby take before pics and some were pretty sad with all of the tears...suddenly I was the "bald is beautiful".  I started laughing and told hubby, "hell its only hair".  My precious temple greys are gone (loved those)...I have many different goofy pics because I felt in control.  I beat the mess of the hair falling out probably only by hours...I showed the chemo and cancer who was in control and it was me!  Never knew I had perfect ears...the list goes on.  I feel liberated and finally in control.  I have 3 wigs and more hats and such than I can imagine.  I had such a fear of no hair and because I feel so free I can actually now laugh and smile about it.  I loved my hair as I know you do yours.  Be proud of you, everyone will love you with no hair.  We never asked for this crap, but in our own ways no matter what that may be we can come to terms with it all.  And just think maybe you will have that butt length hair after everything is all done.  Sure my goal!

Nadine

Anonymous

Nadine - what did you head/hair/scalp feel like?  Mine hurt like hell on Sunday, from the SEs, but I've not noticed any thinning or loss (9 days from 1st treatment) yet.  I'm debating about whether to shave it this weekend before I go back to work or wait until I get my wigs cut and styled on Wed.

Believe1

Hi Ladies, glad to hear everyone is plugging along.  Well, my first one is done and though the tx itself wasnt that bad at all, I do notice I am a little fuzzy and sleepy, and my appetite isnt there.  I am sooo sick of water already, but I guess I have to go pretty heavy on it for the next 2 -3 days or so.  Today I had one bowl of Total cereal and a 8oz cup of that new Fusion thats out.  Its suppose to have you daily amount of fruits and veggies in it.  I rented some movies and plan on just laying around watching some movies and dozing on and off.  The sun is shinning today, but just dont have the drive I guess.  I think part of it was the ride I put myself on getting here, and it wasnt a fun one.  I did write down the name of the Ambien for sleep and will ask my doctor about that........Thanks!!   Hope everyone else will have a fine day!

inthemoment

Hi Kathy,

Glad to help with the wig info, and  love your son's idea of the eyes tatooed on the back of your head!  Today is day 3, and the only real s/e has been some middle of the rad heartburn - went to the store today and just took mylanta as onc suggested, so hopefully that will help.  Only had about 5 hrs sleep last nite.  I'm pretty sure it's from the steroids - only one more day for them.  I am going to try to rest this afternoon and get out for a little while tonite with bf.

 The two sites I used for ordering head coverings are www.tlcdirect.org and www.womanspersonalhealth.com (that on-line store is owned by Barbara Zarrell who is a nurse I worked with who has moved to California, but has been an enormous help in this - if you contact her, use my name.

Hope you have a good day - and for everyone here, long hair, short hair, buzzed, shaved or bald...we are all beautiful, just for being here for each other, so pat your head, love yourself, and we march on, arm in arm, giving and getting strength for the fight.

 Geri

Nadine54

If hair could hurt it did.  I thought I just had a headache, but this felt so weird.  As the day went on it seemed the hair itself hurt.  When my head was shaved (buzzed), every place that had been hurting all day was screaming cries of relief...My only person that I knew as fact who could explain this to me was my daughter...her words were, "Mom, you waited to damn long, now its going to hurt bad".  Yup it hurt.  The hair trying to pop itself out of the folicales must be why there was pain.  This all happened on Thursday the 9th.  No more headaches....or hair pain.  It takes no time now to shower and be dressed....all of my foo-foo hair things are not needed.  This was my control over my hair....I wasn't going to wait and see....I can only speak for myself...but I feel so much more in control over something as buzzing my hair away! 

Hugs to everyone....Nadine

pdlc436

Hi,

I am starting TCH on Thursday, and I am glad we can support each other through this process.  My oncologist really recommended TC over AC/T due to the A effect on the heart.  I have prepared cold packs for nails, lots of coconut water bottles and I also found a site that sells www.artofbeauty.com formaldehyde-free nail polish. Also cut my hair really short. Has anyone heard of coffee enemas?  Sounds disgusting, but a friend who did chemo swears by them...

Happy Easter! 

P. 

Anonymous

You were getting headaches?  I've had one all day that just won't quit.  Maybe that's a sign . . .

comingtoterms

You gals are a hoot!  You make me laugh, even when I don't want to!!!!!  Ok - I don't mean to be a PITA, but:  How much does an average wig run - and I thought I heard a someone say that sometimes your insurance company will pay for it?  Who would you ask for a script for that???  And, last but not least, I have an appt. w/ The American Cancer Society for a wig "fitting", but was too embarrassed to ask about prices - has anyone gone through them?  Thank you all, and to whomever it applies, "Happy Easter!"

Anonymous

Comingtoterms - Hi!  I purchased my wigs, because I didn't like the ones the Cancer Society had for free - they were too old-lady looking, at least in our wig closet.  I have a cutting / fitting with their hairstylist on Wed., and it's free - they provide all services for free.  I am also scheduled for a "Look Good, Feel Better" session on Wed. night - that will be my "beauty" day.

bombus

i have a big case of the pre-chemo blues. i can't seen to get myself motivated to do anything and i cry at the drop of a hat. i hope i feel better once this thing gets started. 

comingtoterms

Let yourself do and be and feel whatever you need to do and be and feel.  Just put a time limit on it, whether it's a a day, or an hour.  Something concrete.  And agree with yourself that when that time period is over, you will refocus your energy in a positive way.  It's when we don't acknowledge our feelings that we get into trouble.  I start the 20th - when is your start date?  Be kind to yourself.  Be as kind to yourself as you would be to someone else who was going through the same thing.

Tammy

ikat

bombus,

Its the waiting that kills me, I have committed to have this done....so lets get it started already. I've already done my surgery.  That was the hard part. Made a appointment with my hairdresser (haven't been there in at least 2 years) for tuesday. I have started to collect my Chemo supply kit.  The things I will need or might want during that first chemo. Have made a appointment with the wig shop. Have to call the insurance co. on monday to see if they will pay for a part of it.

Trying to keep my mind off Wed with list of thing I have to do.  Staying positive is on the top of my list. I try and think of the things I am thankful for. It helps some. I have been trying to get rest so I won't be exhausted going into chemo. I also think that some of what we feel is the fear of the unknown. Because we haven't been there yet our minds can make it a lot worse than it might be.

Maybe your Drs could give you something to settle you down. Get some rest it really helps. You really want to be in the best shape you can be on Wed. 

What part of the country/world are you from. I am in the Greater New York area. I will be going in first thing in the morning. I will keep you in my thoughts on tax day..

kathy 

joanmac52

Just started chemo on Thursday was very scared waiting for the unexpected waiting for the unknown. Have been fine, no symptoms so far a little flushing and a little diarrhea that's it. So happy. Don't know if this is it but I can live with this. 1 down 3 to go Taxotere and Cytoxin anybody out there doing the same would love to hear from you and maybe get each other through this . Thanks Joan

joanmac52

Went for my wig fitting last Tuesday and the woman was so nice she said whatever the insurance company pays she will accept that. So relieved, she was so professional and took alot of pictures of my hair now. Can't wait to hear from other April chemo ladies so we can support each other Joan

aoandrews43

Hi,

I had my first TC on 4/3, have had minimal side effects. Although it may be that what I've experienced isn't so bad as what I expected - I had an image of me being wheeled out of the hospital looking like  Violet Beauregard in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (the blueberry). And that didn't happen ,so whatever I've experienced has been mild compared to that image. I've felt like I've had a minor cold, bad taste, some headaches, but I've been able to do most activities. I have found ginger candies to be helpful when I feel a bit queasy during the day (once I got past the first weekend of more serious nausea).

But now I'm waiting for the hair to come out and dreading it a bit. Nadine54 --thanks for your story, it is great to hear you felt okay bald once you went ahead and just did it. I didn't have great hair to begin with, but I did cut it from mid-length to short a few weeks ago. That really has helped me deal with the loss. I wanted a short wig for summer and actually am liking my shorter cut--but it took me about 2 weeks to get used to it. I go Monday to have the wig I picked out styled (and thinned--much poofier than I'm used to). I went to a "Look good, feel better" session last week and it was really fun.I'm going to try acupuncture next week for the first time as well. I figure I should try to do anything that might help me manage my feelings about this process.

Wishing everyone a healthy, feel-good rest of the weekend.

annadou

If you can eat food you love thats great-that was just a warning to anyone who may have the same SE'S as me-I was starving after the first chemo -had some food I loved and now 6 days later the thought and smell makes me feel sick-maybe we are not all the same though-will try mashed potato next time

Tired -tired -tired -feel as if I wont have got over this before the next time is due-bad taste feel like I have a dose of flu-slight 'not all there feeling"-wasnt expecting it to last this long

Why are some AC treatments every 3 weeks and mine every 2-I know its dose dense but does it depend on the agressiveness of the cancer or what? any comments

Happy easter to all -we are Greek Orthodox here and ours is next week

Anna xxx 

Laurie09

Good to read all the hair stories.  I'm about 9 days post 1st treatment and am anticipating losing mine in the next week or 2.  I was fitted for a wig a week ago and am going end of this week to get it.  Also have ordered some hats.  I'm thinking I'll be wearing the wig primarily at work but outside of work probably not as much.  I guess I'll see how it goes. 

My hair is really long right now and is driving me a little nuts, so I'm thinking of going to have it cut short beforehand. 

Nadine54

Another early morning for me here in my little Idaho town...hair topic again.  I have had very thin hair on top for so long and can't recall if it ever was thick and full like the models seem to have.  I mess around with my wigs and man I laugh because there is so much hair!!! Loosing my hair was the hardest thing...once it was gone...no more trying to figure out how to disguise the years of thinning anymore.  I felt strongly and as hard as it was to say "buzz it off", that was my control over something.  My life was turned upside down in a couple of weeks...lost a boob...felt like a freak for a spell...got over that emotion and dealing with the fact I had lost a boob and that was okay because I was alive...then now your going to give me drugs to kill any cancer cells left and I get to loose my hair and be sick....again..again...what a deal I felt...NOT!  I often talk of one of my daughters in Washington State who has done so many chemo treatments, radiation and barometric treatments and some of the discussions she and I have had over the effects and yup hair loss was and continues to be a big one we still talk about.  Yesterday she and I talked again for several hours long distance about hair.  Her hair was long, butt length and I thought always so beautiful, her hair was who she was.  WRONG!  She told me yesterday her "new" hair is yes short and growing, but its thick, soft and beautiful.  I told her that her hair was always beautiful before.  This daughter is days short of turning 35 and she told me no matter what she loves her new hair and it is the one thing that she can say was worth all of her treatments and continued fight on her type of cancer.  We talked and laughed because little did I realize her hair was also thin on top and she was good and fixing it and not letting even her own mother know.  I told her the wigs have just to much hair...we laughed and laughed.  Girls, our hair is us...its only hair...easy to say??? Nope!  But you know I wanted wigs with long hair, I decided on mid to short wigs.  My wigs were free with the Cancer Center I am a patient with.  Damn that hurt a bit, "PATIENT", I am not a bit patient...need to change that word for sure.  I was going to spend what ever it took to find the perfect wig.  My feelings were why spend money on something that I may not wear much and for sure once my own hair comes back probably never again.  I love the outdoors..you know all of the stuff...riding motorcycles...can you imagine a wig flying off going down the road?  NOT!  ATV's would be a problem since I love the mountains and climbing hills and trails...constant dirt in the wig...NOT!  Other things like fishing and hunting...man what a bad thought of terrible hair days there...cast the fishing pole and poof goes the wig in the water.  Its just hair girls, do what is right for you.  Buzzing my head took care of the mess of waiting for the hair to fall out in clumps...took care of those weird headaches.  Coming from a long line of cancers in my family I have seen more members without hair than I care to remember, each had their issues with hair loss...each dealt with it in their own way...each had new growth thicker and more beautiful than before.  I would be happy to respond to PM's on this hair topic (of course any topic).  Girls, remember we are the backbone of our families...no matter what you choose to do it has to be your decision and yours alone. 

Nadine

TBB

Hi Ladies,

I keep writing and erasing because sometimes I am at a loss for words.  I can say right at this moment I want nothing more than ice cream.  It is such a good mood lifter...I hope that everyone enjoyed Easter with the Family and friends.. was a great day all around....

I read all of these posts about the SE's on the chemo, the Neulasta shot, the steroids, the sleeplessness that everyone is experiencing and just want to pull my hair out in bewilderment on how our bodies can actually handle all of this crap that we are actually putting into it.  If you read the SE's that are listed on each of the medications you are taking you could go crazy with wonder any way.  TAC is the chemo that I start next week.  The Adriamycin is the strongest med and the SE to that med is heart failure... WOW.... My ONC had to explain all of this to me before agreeing to go that aggressive...  It is so hard to be so strong knowing that we have to put more toxic crap into our bodies to kill off the toxic crap that is already there.... The neulasta shot is the next topic I have to deal with.. Bone pain is one of the SE's but read the label on the others... YIKES... Luckily I am not doing the steroids... My chemo has been put off a week due to the fact I had an allergic reaction to the tape on my incisions (bilat mastect) which then got infected and could not have expansion done so my drains are still in going on 6 weeks.  I have not been able to take a SHOWER in 6 weeks, (bird bath only), can only wear Mens button up shirts because of my attachments (drains) and am not able to use my arms to do anything AT ALL until my drains are out... My PS is great and I mean great but a little on the anal side.... (about the drains) so hopefully tomorrow is the day he pulls them and I will be in the shower for the next 72 hours.  Then the Port placement which means another 3 days without a shower.  It is amazing how we take showers for granted...

So I cut the hair super short last week and going shorter next week.  I think it is fun trying all the new hair dos before it actually falls out.  I went to ACS to look at wigs but decided not to do wigs at all... I am determined to be HAT girl since apparently I was meant to go through BC and experience what I have to date.  Being Self Employed means hat friendly.    My DH shaved his head 2 weeks ago and he actually looks great. He is 34 and that style works for him.  He has a nice shaped head for it also.  

I am so glad that we have this forum to be able to vent whatever our feelings are. We seem to be very strong, wonderful woman that have to fall back a few spaces at times.  We have lessons to be learned from this experience and different lessons to each of us.  Not sure right at this moment what mine are but just take a few moments each day and think back to what kind of person we were a year ago or even 6 months ago and see what has changed in each of us.  See what good we can pull out of this and make our lives better after all this is behind us.  I have already said that I am going to travel more and enjoy life way more than I did 6 months ago.. I am going to take at least 3 showers a day instead of one, I am going to shave my legs each day until the hair is gone, and I am doing RETAIL THERAPY (shopping) every time I can to make me feel better...

Hats off to all of us for getting through each day, smiling more, and sitting back with our feet up wondering why the hell we are going through this and what are lessons are.... Each and every one of you have inspiring words and you make it a great day when I turn on this computer and read what everyone has gone through to this day and how we are all getting through it...

Be strong! tbb