Anxiety

pabbie

Anxiety

pabbie

Hi, I know I heard alot about your 1st mammogram after being treated for breast cancer. I just had my mammogram in January and they said I had to come back and do a second one because they saw some microcalcifications in my left breast (the good one). Wow, what an anxiety-ridden experience waiting for the second mammogram, waiting in the waiting room, and waiting in the mammography room for the dr to look at the second set of slides. The room was closing in on me a little bit. I'm on clonazapem already for anxiety and sleeping problems but this was tough.

The dr said the pictures were benign.(sp) My left breast is OK. But now I'm feeling so drained like I could fall asleep. And why don't I feel more happy about it?

I appreciate this new forum. 

leaf

Maybe its like we don't collapse during the emergency, but we collapse after.  I know that can happen with me.

I can't speak for anyone else but myself, but for me I felt like "Well, I had something weird before.  Why can't I have something weird again?  How can you possibly be sure?  I know for a fact you can't be sure.  I have at least 4 conditions/diagnoses with an incidence of less than 1:10,000. I've been diagnosed with something new every 3-6 months since my LCIS diagnosis in 12-05.  One of my diseases is scleroderma, with an incidence of  5-20:1 million, with a mean survival of 11 years."

I think so many people have trouble with insomnia, they'd feel grateful if they could get a peaceful  sleep.

Hang in there.  We may not be in the exact same situation, but we can sure empathize.

taraleec

I had LCIS, complex sclerosing lesion(radial scar) intraductal hyperplasia and sclerosing adenosis, in March 08 after lumpectomy(mammo & ultras. said "no mass, cyst"), I had radiation.  Before treatments were over, I discovered lump in Rt breast which surgeon couldn't feel in June, my mammo & ultras. didn't show it, so I let it go.  3 mos. later at follow up for Lt, my surgeon could feel the Rt lump, he then did lumpectomy, came back as adenosis.  Then I have a 3 year old son, whose dad is trying to 'take custody' & get me to pay child support, tho' he hasn't paid any in over 16 mos.  3 mos. later I feel more lumps in Rt, which gyn.can feel, but surgeon can't, mammo & ultras. don't show them either.  I'm really scared it's serious, I asked for MRI, which I had today. At procedure, they couldn't get IV in my Rt arm, so they did the left, halfway thru when they began the contrast(dye) flowing, it began burning & hurting, they pulled me out.  My inner arm (where it bends swelled to the size of a golf ball or more, the tech said the dye exploded into my tissue. They then put IV in Rt and finished MRI.  I CAN'T SLEEP either. Sorry I'm no help, just relating,  Good luck to you.

Shirlann

Leaf is sooo right!  Most of the time, we all do pretty well during the "crisis", but when we get through the real intense part of this nightmare journey, then the PTSD sets in.  A lot of women get this during rads, since this is usually the last thing they can think of to do to us.

Oh Tara, honey, ask your doc for some Valium or Zanax, then put it by your bed and if you need it, it is easy to get.  You don't need to go without sleep, you have too much on your plate.  

Get some help from "Better Living Through Chemistry".  No sense suffering.]

Hugs, Shirlann

Dogmom7

When I got my mammogram (that ultimately )showed the cancer, I thought I would die from the anxiety, as my sister had been diagnosed a year previously. To top it all off, the hospital was remodeling and men with hard hats and walkie-talkies were parading past us miserable, frightened women in paper gowns, sitting in a hallway because the waiting room was off-limits. No magazines, nothing. It was awful. One of the worst days of my life. And then having to go in for the ultrasound the following week was even worse! The best thing was dsicovering Xanax the day of my biopsy. I now only use it to sleep at night, but that day it saved me from a breakdown. I'm starting to think I may suffer PTSD just from those horrible visits.

artsee

It's really nice to have these threads so everyone knows they are not ALONE. Last month when I went to see my Onco for the results of my CT scan, he told me the good news and said to me 

" You know you can smile now". Yes it was good news but at the point I was at after all this testing and waiting....my mind was already on the NEXT scan. UGH! Oh the joys of BC. I pray we will all be breakdown free.

Artsee

Marg33

I know this is an old thread now but I have to share. I'm full of anxiety, just been dx and can't get to my dr. till after my surgery, when I'll be too sore to go anyways.  I do have Xanax for night sleep but I need one during the day and just can't get to see dr.  Its hell feeling anxious all day long. I only have enough for 1 at night, scared to take during the day case I run out. Its easter weekend and drs are off and my surgery is early next week. I'll be a real mess by then, but seeing that some other women feel it too helps me to know I'm not just going insane from all the stress of it. Lord love us for our staying power. We have no choice but to go through whatever is ahead, so I'd like some more meds to help me get where I'm going. I'm scared too, just like everyone else.  Hugs to all, Marg

leaf

I'm so sorry you are going through this, Marg.  No, you're not going insane.  We all want to be ready for whatever is ahead for ourselves down the road.  It is normal to want to be prepared for uncertain outcomes. Of course you are scared.  You didn't choose for this to happen to you. You would not be normal if you were as 'calm as a cucumber'.

Some people find distraction helps.  I couldn't do things I liked to do, but could do some things I hated.  It can be really hard to find the inner part in yourself to help comfort yourself, but some people are able to do that.

You don't have to be brave for your surgery, you just have to show up.  Feel free to vent or ask questions.

Katwrite

I was doagnosed 3 years ago, went through 2 surgeries, radiation, placed on Tanoxifen, which gave me hot flashes, affected the most intimate tissue in horrible ways, developed lymphadema, did not feel supported by anyone but my very best friends,(went through lots of other disheartening issues I'll talk about later, became depressed, anxious, sought medical help, started seeing a therapist who asled me on my 6th visit when was I going to get over it?, have trouble sleeping, keep my xanax with me at all times, take ambien several nights a week to sleep, and finally started taking an antidepressant in February of this year.  I can't go to a doctor visit without crying.  I did  join my church choir, which my husband didn't like at first, and have developed a stronger faith, but still have a long way to go.  This is the first time I've chatted and only started viewing this sight recently.  I can see I needed this a long time ago.  Nobody else understands.