Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

ChiSandy

Termite, hugs and prayers for your bil, and that perhaps the new valve will “take” and stop leaking. Is he on the transplant list yet?

My vision in the operated eye has improved to the point I can’t wear my prescription glasses any more--the distance correction is too strong and I no longer have astigmatism in that eye. So I realized I had to do something--can’t go spec-less because my lid is still swollen and that sub-conjunctival hemorrage, though harmless, still looks creepy. People might think I have pinkeye and stay away from me for fear of catching it. So I called LensCrafters & VisionWorks--the two places with on-site labs--and both said it's against company policy to replace one lens with a blank. (They can replace it with a prescription change--why not a "prescription" that says "no corrections?"--replace both lenses, or simply remove the lens entirely). Removing the lens without replacing it with something not only would look ridiculous, but would be pointless--if anything it would make my bloodshot eye and its swollen lid more prominent, and the point of wearing any glasses now is to camouflage it until it looks normal and/or I can wear eye makeup again.

So what I did was Uber it up to Lincolnwood Town Center mall and get two pair of gradient sunglasses at LensCrafters: one pair of classic Ray-Ban Wayfarers, dark up top fading to clear at the bottom, for everyday till this eye heals; and a big bling-y fashionista pair of Ralph Laurens with darker gradients fading to amber at the bottom for dresswear (like tonight). Both pair accomplish what undereye concealer (still off-limits for at least a weak) would, protect me from indoor bright light (though for sunlight I still have to wear those welders' glasses Solar Shields I was given--or at least the smaller pair I originally bought to cover my old rimless specs), and once this eye heals, I would have them in reserve for the other eye post-op. And if I do still need distance-and-intermediate-vision correction, I can replace the lenses with prescription ones. Meanwhile, while I was waiting the 2 hrs it took to replace the very dark gradients in the Laurens with lighter ones, I shopped at Old Navy. Got a bunch of T-shirt dresses on sale (still an XL, not XXL, thank goodness) and then saw some even bling-ier mirrored sunglasses for $15 a pair. Not gradients, too dark for indoors, but perfect for outdoor use if I don't want to look dorky. (Had planned to try Sunglass Hut first--but it was replaced by a cellphone store, so that's why I went on to LensCrafters). Had I seen the Old Navy shades first, I might have saved a bundle, but then I wouldn't have these uber-cool hipster-ironic Wayfarers. Was surprised how easy it was to get an Uber back home too (had I not been carrying packages, I might have taken the Pace bus to the CTA Red Line and walked home from my neighborhood station).

Gonna head upstairs, put together my outfit for tonight (dressy black shell or tank, palazzos, sheer black jacket and whatever dressy shoes or sandals are comfy and don't aggravate my blisters or give me new ones), and take a shower. Too bad I can't wash my hair yet--and my stylist is off today. Even if I could Uber it over there; I don't trust anyone else to do a shampoo & blowdry without stripping the keratin treatment from my hair. Not every salon uses sodium-and-sulfate-free shampoos & conditioners, and I feel ridiculous bringing my own. So I'll have to trust dry shampoo, my styling tools and maybe a bit of shine spray (all with my operated eye closed of course).

Speaking of which, after I put my first set of drops in this morning, I closed that eye, and gasped--the vision in my left (not-yet-operated) eye is like looking through a yellow frosted window. How on earth did I function with both eyes like that???

MinusTwo

Sandy - My friend was able to get plain glass lens put in at WalMart on one side while waiting the required time before the second operation.

IllinoisLady

Hmm, as always the value of sharing here is being able to tap into what each of us ( though for me that is darn little ) has done to get through life before, during and even after cancer dx. I hope to never have to replace any lenses in my glasses, but I do have a non-correctable eye so there is always a plain lens on that side. It is great to know where I might be able to myself get another should ever do something.

Sandy, sounds like tonight is going to be great with your complimentary "specs" to get you through. Good for you.

ChiSandy

Minus, I’m going to try I.F. Optical on Mon.--he’s “shomer Shabbos” so he’s only open M-Th and closed during Jewish holidays and their eves. When I had a pair of drill-mounts that developed a cracked lens and LensCrafters wouldn’t touch them, they sent me to him. He charged me less than $100--for a progressive prescription lens--and it was ready the next day. I like those frames, so I’m not going to buy a whole “dummy” pair.

My cataracts are caused by age and heredity, not by bc or AIs (though Tamoxifen can cause them). They developed a dozen years ago and the optometrist told me they were beginning to ripen in 2013, but not so I could tell until spring 2015--when I was looking at Bob across the table in a restaurant in Vegas and couldn’t make out his features, because he was sitting in front of a sunlit window. I asked him if that’s how he knew his cataract was ripe, and he said it was one symptom. (He had the R one done in 2008, and will get the L one done next month. I will get my L one done a week after him).

Wren44

Sandy, When you wrote about the yellow frosted glass, I tried covering one eye at a time. I've had the left one done, but not the right. Sure enough, the screen looks yellowish beige with the unoperated eye and white with the one that was fixed. Are you getting both close or distance or one of each? I'm trying to decide.

ChiSandy

I got distance correction alone, because first, Medicare won’t cover the multifocal lenses; and second, the multifocals tend to cause more glare and halos around lights at night. I do a lot of my driving at night, especially while traveling, so that was a dealbreaker for me. I was considering getting a toric lens for astigmatism correction--but surprisingly, the irregularity that causes astigmatism wasn’t in the shape of the eyeball but just the shape of the lens. (In retrospect, I didn’t start needing an astigmatism correction until my early 30s...just about the time a cataract is born. Could have been the opacification of my lenses was distorting their shape). I’m not “farsighted,” aka hyperopia (caused by too short an eyeball, whereas myopia is from a too-long eyeball): my reading correction is for presbyopia, the age-related gradual stiffening of the muscles that focus the lens. Correcting the other eye for hyperopia would be pointless, as I don’t have it. When I was a kid, i was 20/100 in my L eye and 20/80 in my R--corrected to 20/40 in both. Just before surgery, my R eye was 20/40 and the L 20/80, both corrected to 20/20. My presbyopia started out in my late 30s at 1.0 diopter, eventually reaching 2.50, which is the reading portion of my progressive eyeglass Rx. But it turns out the stronger correction was needed because the cataracts were making it harder to see through the lens. My pre-op glasses are useless--they overcorrect for the right eye for not just distance but reading. Without glasses, I have to move the page up & back till I find the “sweet spot.” If I put on an old pair of 1.50 drugstore readers, I read fine. If I put on 2.50 drugstore readers or try to read with my pre-op progressives, everything swims and my head hurts. So I think I will get distance correction alone in the L one as well. Meanwhile, rather than replace the R lens of my glasses with a blank, I will just get a “dummy” pair with just enough tint to camouflage my dark circles & bags.

ChiSandy

This is what my R eye looks like (mirror image--it's on the right in the photo). I'm opening it as wide as I can.

Post-op eye, pre-op glasses:

With my Wayfarers on:

Drives me nuts that I can’t use eye makeup till at least next Fri.

IllinoisLady

We find by losing. We hold fast by letting go.
We become something new by ceasing to be something old. This seems to be close to the heart of that mystery. I know no more now than I ever did about the far side of death as the last letting-go of all, but now I know that I do not need to know, and that I do not need to be afraid of not knowing. God knows. That is all that matters.

Frederick Buechner

IllinoisLady

Whoever you are, there is some younger person who thinks you are perfect. There is some work that will never be done if you don't do it.There is someone who would miss you if you are gone.There is a good reason for becoming better than you are.There is a place that you alone can fill. -unattributed

IllinoisLady

Positive thinking is not the destination; it is the journey. An optimistic person will be constantly challenged-- by external circumstances as well as inner fears and doubts. Always remember that these tests are like a ladder you must climb.As you move past each rung, your optimism strengthens and your confidence begins to flex newly found muscle that you might never have developed otherwise.

Montague Ewards

Anneb1149

To Jackie,

This just about says it all!

Have a great day!

Anne

DaraB

OH, Happy Birthday, Jackie! Thanks for all you do for us on this thread!! Dara

Wren44

Happy Birthday, Jackie! Celebrate for the whole week.

ChiSandy

Have the happiest of birthdays, Jackie!!!

MinusTwo

Jackie - have a marvelous day. I love the 'celebrate all week' advice from Wren.

ElizabethAM

Have a wonderful day Jackie.

IllinoisLady

Stopping in to say hi and so far -- so good. A great birthday. I went to work and then came home and washed my car for the first time. Now, just to be clear, I have gone to the car wash but it was a much cooler day here -- about 80 and so I wanted to try out a new car washing recipe. I'll have to wait till the morning I think ---it's late but it sure looked shiny to me.

My cousin told me ( and I have to say his very old truck ( about 18 yrs. old ) looked brand new to me, to take some med hot water, put some Murphy's Wood Soap in it, wash and rinse the car. Take an old clean regular towel and wipe down good ---- then take one of the bigger lint free ( sorta fuzzy type ) cloths and just go over the whole car sort of buffing it up. I have to say it looks quite good to me.

My car is a dusty blue color so with the evening dimness I'm not totally sure, but at least I'm happy that it is much cleaner. I do think I see a nice improvement from going to the car wash. Even their $10.00 washes don't seem to do quite as good as this one seems right now.

Hmm, not much of a celebration huh !!! but we will go out to find something to eat and Dh will take me to the movie --- whenever we are both off. Hoping to see Sully but don't know if it has been in our little town as yet.

Thanks for all your Happy Birthday wishes again. I feel great gratitude for having actually gotten through 3 major health incidents ( the last one was the BC ) and still be here feeling most days none too worse for it all. Blessings to all of you.

Jackie

bonnets

Enjoy your quiet birthday , Jackie!

Luvmaui

HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY JACKIE!!!

IllinoisLady

A rich mind and noble spirit will cast over the humblest home a radiance of beauty which the upholsterer and decorator can never approach.Who would not prefer to be a millionaire of character, of contentment, rather than possess nothing but the vulgar coins of a Scrooge?Whoever uplifts civilization is rich though he or she die penniless; and future generations will remember them fondly. -Orison Swett Marden

termite

Jackie,. happy belated birthday!

ChiSandy

Eye update--I see my surgeon tomorrow, and he says it’s okay for me to drive there (to the relief of my husband and housekeeper, who can both sleep in a bit). Here’s what I look like today (still no make-up). I am so vain that I normally edit out some wrinkles, but I’m among friends here.

Here I am without my glasses--well, at least without them on my face:

And with my glasses:

As Nora Ephron wrote (title of her book) back when she was 67, I hate my neck. Well, actually, I wince at it and want so badly to grab the “retouch” tool in my photo program!

DaraB

Looking GREAT, Sandy!

Wren44

You look just fine, Sandy. I have to admit I'd like to do something to my neck when I see it in photos.

IllinoisLady

Well everyone, my neck --- can I just say ick. Had a stroke and seems my face never regained its totally proper place. As I had a bad thyroid ( not found for 7 yrs. until I had a major-sized goiter ) I already had a sort of pocketety protuberance -- then add my face not lifting up where it should have --- but oh well !!! The good news is as long as I refuse to have a love affair with a mirror I can be as good looking as I feel like on any given day --- so chin up or cheer up and put on a happy face, hmmmm I guess.

IllinoisLady

"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things."

– Robert Brault

carolehalston

Happy Birthday, Jackie!

You look great, Sandy. One request. Could you break your posts up into shorter paragraphs for easier reading? It's much easier on aging eyes to read smaller blocks of print.

Termite, it sounds like your move to FL is going well. It will be good to become acquainted with neighbors.

We're having fall weather here in the north country of MN. Yesterday started off in the 30's but warmed up to 60's. We played golf with a friend who'd driven up from southern MN for a day or two. There couldn't have been a more perfect day for golf. I even had a decent score, for me. Afterwards we went to a restaurant on Island Lake (our lake) and had hamburgers out on the patio overlooking the lake. We could see the Pine Hollow Resort docks.

Today it's cloudy and cool with drizzling rain. Forecast calls for possible thunder storms.

Yesterday we added to our non-pooping animal collection. We found a carved bear we liked and negotiated a reasonable price. I'll post a picture, also the picture of Puffin and me taken in her back yard. I enjoyed the hours spent with her. She has accomplished wonders in organizing the garage and her dh's workshop during the months following his tragic accident and death.

I'm looking forward to going home soon!

My reference to golf made me think of Rita. She has been absent for quite a while. Are you out there, Rita?!!

ohiofan

Belated Happy Birthday, Jackie !!!!

carolehalston

Puffin and I in her charming back yard in Fargo.

ohiofan

Great picture!