Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

IllinoisLady

Doing nothing for others is the undoing of one's
self. We must be purposely kind and generous, or we
miss the best part of existence. The heart that
goes out of itself gets large and full of joy.
This is the great secret of the inner life. We do
ourselves the most good doing something for others.

Horace Mann

IllinoisLady

A spot of rain through the evening hours that was expected. Maybe some more tonight. It will stay warm for now, but gray still isn't my favorite outdoor color. Dh and I spoke about a family member who dearly loved gray. She painted it over as much as she dared. Last two houses were gray on the outsides. I didn't care much for it. The gray I like, when I like any, is the charcoal shade on some of the cars people drive.

Glad the week-end is coming on. I have some of my cards done now ( actually most of them ) and so I can intersperse the last few with some of my 'normal' things that need doing.

I hope today is nice and productive for everyone.

Wren44

I used to bitch about all the gray houses here in Seattle. We have gray skies, wet gray cement roads and people feel they need to add to that? Now they're putting lime green trim on gray buildings. It doesn't get worse than that IMHO.

carolehalston

Gray has been a big decorator color for the last 10 years. Pale gray has replayed the pale tan that was once the most popular indoor wall color. I like a silvery gray exterior paint. Kind of a driftwood hue. And green with gray doesn't offend me, Wren! Black and red are good trim colors.

Off to the gym. As usual the road trip put some extra unneeded lbs. on my body. But I did enjoy some fast-food meals that I don't usually eat. On the way home, dh and I stopped at a Popeye's in MS and had fried chicken with a biscuit. Popeye's has really good biscuits. In Chicago I had a Portillo's Italian beef sandwich with sweet and hot peppers. Yum.

IllinoisLady

What if we like our outrageous side best?
We "know" that the "right" thing to do is to suck it up,
put the costume and the happy face back in storage for another year,
re-dress in our frown and gray flannel suit,
and trudge back to job, chores, "responsibilities," and "duty."
Stop! Maybe TODAY is the day to put the frown and gray flannel
into that dusty storage locker, and start to LIVE.
Not just today, but EVERY DAY for the rest of your life!
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

IllinoisLady

We have Ivory ( seems you can't get the exact color we have now ) siding with Barn Red shutters. We chose the color to try and come close to what the color of our garage was when put up. We used a carport that was already in place, framed it, and put up siding on the sides that matched the metal of the carport, then put regular siding on the front and back of it. We put a med-sized single door in the front of the garage and a big double door sized one in the back. If Dh didn't have the darn thing full up to the rafters nearly I/we could have our drive-through garage back. Maybe one of these days.

Sounds like the Sears Corporation is getting ready now to dump the home town stores so I do think Dh will retire. He isn't cleared for work in any event and has to do at least 6 wks. of occupational/physical therapy. Hopefully he will just go ahead and quit working entirely. He is 79 and it is well past time for him. He has spending habits he'd like to hang onto but he can adjust just like I did. I do take the occasional job, but it is quite inconsistent.

Warm here today, but we have night rains in order to enjoy it. That's how it goes. Still, I'm more inclined this time of yr. to expect cold or even snow. So, we will enjoy while it lasts. Going to interesting as to just what we see this yr. and how long winter will go on.

Sad to hear of George H.W. Bush's passing last night. He lived a long and good life. I didn't care so much for him but really liked Barbara Bush.

I hope you all have a pretty Saturday.

MCBaker

I haven't checked the news yet today. I agree, when an ex-President dies, it is the end of an era. They still have a role of being consultants.to the sitting president, that is why they retain the title and protection. Won't elucidate further.

Shortly before my marriage turned sour, my ex painted our house a sickly pickle green. Be thankful for grey! And I was left with a house, recently purchased, to sell.

Three to five inches of snow expected for the next 24h.

Mrs. illinois, it is time for him to retire. I substitute taught for several years, until my hearing loss got bad enough that I couldn't tell where sounds were coming from. Around here, there is a lot of seasonal work available, most famously, the cranberry harvest. But I don't have the stamina for that.

IllinoisLady

Should be written on the heart.

By choosing your thoughts, and by selecting which emotional currents you will release and which you will reinforce, you determine the quality of your Light. You determine the effects that you will have upon others, and the nature of the experiences of your life. -Gary Zukav

IllinoisLady

A bit cloudy, and rain likely tonight but another warmer day here. Not sure how today will go but that is okay. We will have maybe one of those great eclectic days where 'whatever' can be the order of the day. Those are nice now and then. Dh's computer ( laptop ) is in the process of giving up the ghost. I've been at him for a long time to get a desktop type. He has had a number of laptops through the yrs. and I think decided he liked them for the space issues as well as the overall popularity the laptops had for a variety of reasons. In the end, his eyes and hands I think have come to the time when he needs to make a change.

I have a rather stubby hands so I also hated trying to use laptops. They did made a few bigger ones later on, but I've been a desk-top user so long I just feel like a computer user out of water whenever I'm around a lap-top. Glad dh will switch over. He uses mine from time to time so I think he will adjust pretty easily.

Hoping you all have a marvelous Sunday.

ChiSandy

Another year, another Bar Show under my belt (17 of them). Four performances down, none to go. So long as there's a woman older than me in the cast (she's 74) I will keep plugging away next year. This year, the prednisone kicked in just in time and by yesterday I was in the strongest voice I've had in years. Didn't have to take the high soprano parts down an octave to sing with the altos (been awhile since I'd had to hit a high A in performance, and it felt good). Mics behaved themselves, and on the choral Cats parody ("Jellicle Rats") they finally lit the chorus and turned on the drop mics, so the audience actually saw & heard us and not just the soloists who sang the intro.

Mixed rain & snow didn't materialize--just rain. (Predicting lake effect snow for tomorrow, though).

Now to madly dash off all my holiday cards, and make latkes for tomorrow night (too tired tonight, even for a mix--so followed the tradition of eating foods fried in oil by killing off the last stale Krispy Kreme). Not lighting the real menorah either--don't trust myself around fire tonight, so just screwed in the first lightbulbs in the electric one in the window. Happy Hanukkah!

IllinoisLady

If you want peace, stop fighting.
If you want peace of mind,
stop fighting with your thoughts.
- Peter McWilliams

carolehalston

DH and I both are laptop users. I love my pricey small hp that sits on my lap now as I type. I had to buy a more expensive laptop in order to get a small one. DH occasionally uses his desk in our small office but I seldom use my desk except on those occasions when I tackle clearing away the documents and papers that find their way to the desk's surface. These days I write few checks to pay bills. Almost every bill is set up to be paid automatically or I schedule the payment online at our bank's website.

We both do most of our reading on Kindles. I find reading a bulky printed book very inconvenient. Other readers still prefer holding the books. My sister is in that category. She gave me my Kindle Fire after buying it for herself and deciding it wasn't for her.

Today is a cool sunny day. After running the a/c a couple of days, we're in that ideal state of not running a/c or heat. I skipped WW meeting this morning and will venture out and about for some shopping.

Happy Monday to all.

IllinoisLady

Glad you had success during your show run. You sound a bit exhausted but happy. Likely due to being able to get home w/o trudging in snow. I'm glad for you but we are back to 'colder' again so snow could come most anytime I think. I'll have to watch though.

Dh got another computer and I got a new gasoline mower. Our old one stumbles and could be repaired, but it has a lot of age on it -- about 16 yrs. so we opted with the store going out of business to secure another one on a really good sale. We will see what to do with the old one when Dh gets back in shape where he can really work on things. Not sure what is on for today -- I think mainly the regular things. New glasses will maybe be here today or tomorrow.

Hope you all have a good Monday.

MCBaker

My computer died shortly before surgery, which denied me use of telephone. Got that squared away. My kindle had a nervous breakdown but recovered. However, I got nervous about it, and ordered one which is two versions above what I had on sale. I will be giving the old one to daughter. My sister will be delivering a used laptop to me next weekend. In between the pain and the drugs I got my online banking thoroughly screwed up. Most things take place automatically, and I can do the two most important monthly transactions at an ATM. On top of that, I lost my keys. Things will be better from here on. Only thing that is keeping me sane through this is self-talk. "Resolve one problem at a time." " No need to overreact, that is not such a serious problem. " " Now, creative problem-solving, not rigid thinking. ". It has been rough, but I firmly believe I am on the upswing.

oh-- and there are still problems with the laundry-room.

Wren44

MCBaker, Great self talk! What kept me sane through treatment and a previous ovarian ca scare was deciding to wait until the problem was actually there to worry about it. Worked really well on the OVCA scare and pretty well for BC. One problem at a time. And yay for a sister who can bring you a laptop.

MCBaker

I just vented to a friend. If my drain output dwindles to 20ml, I can see my PCP to get it pulled, then ask her about Xanax or something similar. I got online banking taken care of. Still have to go to an ATM for my cash allowance. I have laundry in the drier.

And I am sure I will get some answers when I visit the oncologist on friday. Just discouraged about my hormone receptor status and wondering if there is anything available to.prevent a reocurrance other than amputating lefty. I really want to keep her, she fed my babies so well.

ChiSandy

MCBaker, AFAIK they stopped giving chemo to DCIS patients >15 yrs. ago. Just like there wasn't anything you could have done to prevent DCIS in "Righty," nothing short of losing "Lefty" will prevent your getting a contralateral recurrence. You can try lifestyle changes, but they're really more useful for lowering recurrence risk of hormone+ bc. Just live your life and roll the dice--chances are this was "it," period. Have the good stiff drink that we ER+ gals need to avoid, and thank your lucky stars you don't have to suffer the side effects of radiation & endocrine therapy. In your case, it's likely that you really are "one and done."

MCBaker

Thanks for the reassurance Sandy. I guess I will have to wait until Friday before making any informed decisions.

IllinoisLady

Genuine compassion is based on the recognition that others have the right to happiness just like yourself, and therefore even your enemy is a human being with the same wish for happiness as you, and the same right to happiness as you.A sense of concern developed on this basis is what we call compassion; it extends to everyone, irrespective of whether the person's attitude toward you is hostile or friendly. -the Dalai Lama

IllinoisLady

Glad you had words of wisdom Sandy for MC. None of us know for sure what will step through the door to our life, so mainly doing what you feel very comfortable with while living your life as positively as you can is pretty much what is open. We don't suspect many things that do happen to us -- even knowing the possibilities. It always seems like something that will happen to the 'other' person -- whomever they are. No rose gardens too much for anyone, but we can learn to be aware of the thorns and find good ways, positive ways, to deal with them. Just like planning trips -- there are good routes, and we can find those and use them to elevate our circumstances. As many here are aware -- that is a large part of what I think we are meant to do while we are here. Elevate ourselves while helping all around us to do their best to do the same.

Snowing a bit outside. I think it may do it on and off most of the day as it won't get warm enough to sleet or rain -- at least I'm hoping it doesn't. I can do some snow now that we are in December.

Still hard to believe we are so close to the end of 2018. I'm not thinking yet of 2019 but many reasons why I'm hoping we all get chances to make that a great yr. for all of us. I'm just concentrating on the nice things that will come with the rest of this yr. Some nice snows maybe, some great meals, love and joy spending time with family and friends during the holiday season and just being grateful for every blessing whether large or small.

Hope you all have a really wonderful day.

carolehalston

Sunny here with temperature in the 50's. DH and I went to the gym where I did 20 minutes on the elliptical and 20 minutes on the recumbent bike. I skipped the weight bearing machines and had a cup of coffee with some of the folks in the reception area. We have "regulars" out there who seem to do more visiting than exercising.

I just finished looking up recipes for crab cakes to jog my memory of the ingredients I use in addition to the lump crab meat. I have a large collection of cookbooks but I often go to Google for recipe ideas. I seldom follow a recipe verbatim.

This afternoon is bingo at the nursing home.

Have a great Tuesday. And you're welcome to your snow, Jackie!

MCBaker

Just finished an OT visit. I need a bit of cheerleading for my exercises. Frustrated with pain doing normal activities, but what else can you expect when you don't follow the prescription? And the usual lymphedema schpiel.

ChiSandy

My sympathies, MC. How are you deviating from "the prescription?" Keep up the exercises--they used to have a post-mx program called "Reach to Recovery;" anything that will improve (or restore) your range of motion is a good thing--might even prevent cording. (Despite my BS' NP advising against it, I did "wall-walking" with my fingers--and both my LE OT and later my trainer had me doing so daily. That NP was a little weird, and the new one is more in line with reality).

I've hit on a good regimen for sleep: CDB oil + 1/8 (not a typo) of a 25mg. blue raspberry Indica gummy (or a whole regular CDB gummy plus a square of CDB chocolate--you don't need an MMJ ID card for these, which I get at the health food store). No booze or Xanax necessary. Sleeping 8-10 hrs with no hangover.

Just signed up for a pop-up dinner by "Table For Twenty" (pun intended by the organizer--and coincidentally, the expiry date on the credit card I used is 4/20). Every course will have some element infused with CBD. (Until recreational weed is legalized here--and presumably, there would be permits to allow distribution outside a dispensary--no THC, ID card or no). Then we get sent home with a CBD swag bag. Saw it featured on "Windy City Live," and the hosts pronounced the sampled dishes delicious.

MCBaker

What led me to asking for a ROM eval was actually a bit of cording. Instead of three times a day it has been once every three days. We had a major talk about my goals and frustrations.

Yes, I would be much less happy.without the CBD.

ChiSandy

Bet the cording eases once the drains are out--they could be irritating adjacent lymph nodes.

MCBaker

She suggested so, too. But I have no control over that. Dehydrating myself is not advisable.

IllinoisLady

Love is something you and I must have. We must have it because our spirit feeds upon it. We must have it because without it we become weak and faint. Without love our self-esteem weakens. Without it our courage fails. Without love we can no longer look confidently at the world. We turn inward and begin to feed upon our own personalities, and little by little we destroy ourselves. With it we are creative. With it we march tirelessly. With it, and with it alone, we are able to sacrifice for others. -Chief Dan George

IllinoisLady

Our snow did not develop too much since all day yesterday it was thin and intermittent. A bit more consistent through the night-time hours, but still very little accumulation. Should get up to 39 degrees or so today so I don't think we will have much by day's end. We won't be a lot warmer at any time through the next week either. No day past 45 and maybe only one day that high.

I will continue to wonder what sort of 'winter' we will really have. The propane company ( they have generally been good indicators ) did raise our monthly level but they were off last yr.( causing us to go higher our last few months last yr. if we didn't want to have a lg. make up chg. on the last month of payment for the yr. ) and I've wondered if maybe they didn't want to get caught out again.

Hoping for a slightly warmer winter again. Hope you are all going to have a really good day.

IllinoisLady

Remember, there is no situation so completely hopeless that something constructive cannot be done about it. When faced with a minus, ask yourself what you can do to make it a plus. A person practicing this attitude will extract undreamed-of outcomes from the most unpromising situations. Realize that there are no hopeless situations; there are only people who take hopeless attitudes. -Norman Vincent Peale

IllinoisLady

Hmmm, snow turning to rain today since it will warm in the later part of the day. Doesn't sound too appealing but it is winter -- even if we seem to have more rain in view for actual precipitation. We don't have any snow leftover from the last little overnight episode. Won't have any today if rain turns up -- assuming some snow comes first and there is very much.

Thrilled to have been able to go pick up my new glasses yesterday. Shortly ( 2 yrs. ago now ) after getting a new prescription and a new pr. they were knocked off my nightstand by careless me. Hit the floor just right I guess and a mar turned up. Fortunately it was on the left side and that eye does not work real well. I could not find the pr. of glasses I had been wearing so could not take the new glasses in for repair which actually had a very sturdy warranty. I wore the glasses because I needed them so badly, but I was constantly aware of the 'mar' on the left. If that eye was as strong I don't think I could have made it for two yrs.

I'm told now that the new warranty policy stipulates ( wondering how many times this may have happened ) that the store that sold you your glasses can now order just the lenses --- and change them out for you, so that you don't have to go w/o your new prescription while you are waiting. This would have worked so well had it been the policy two yrs. ago. Glad they changed this.

Nothing special today which is good. Dh is having his first therapy since his operation. He is scheduled for 6 weeks of it. Hopefully he will do well and really be back in the groove. I/we were told though that it really does take about a yr. to fully recover from this type of surgery. Got my fingers crossed. He gave up his walker which was good and since he got a prescription for Lyrica from the V.A. he is going w/o the cane now too. So progress is being made.

I hope you are all going to have a great day.