TWAS THE MONTH AFTER CHRISTMAS

1Cathi

'Twas the month   after Christmas,

and all through the house

Nothing would fit me, not   even a blouse.

 The cookies I'd nibbled,

 and the eggnog I'd guzzled

 how could I have   done that.

I should have been muzzled.

 When I got on the scales there arose such a   number

 To lose all that   weight, will take me all   summer.

  I'd remember the   marvelous meals I'd prepared; gravies and sauces   and beef nicely rared,

The wine and the rum   balls, the bread and the cheese

And the way I'd never said, "No thank you,   please."

As I dressed myself   in my husband's old shirt

 And prepared once again to do battle with   dirt---

I said to myself, as only I can " You can't spend   all winter disguised as a man!  

 So--away with the   last of the sour cream dip,

 Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and   chip.

 Every last bit of food that I like must be banished

Till all the   additional ounces have vanished.

I won't have a cookie--not even a   lick

I'll want to chew   only on a long celery stick.  

I won't have hot   biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,

 I'll munch on a carrot and quietly   cry.

 I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore--- But isn't that what   January is for?

Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.

 Happy New Year to   all and to all a good diet! "

  Wishing you   Peace, Health, Laughter,   Hope and Happiness in this New   Year